We broke up because...
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Too much of a ladies man!
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Didn't like my afro. Yeaaa0
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he had creatures living in his afro!0
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She didn't like me keeping minions in my afro0
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she wouldnt flirt with me anymore ;p0
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He kept running away0
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she wouldnt chase me0
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Always expected me to do all the chasing.Pfft!0
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Only got lovin' if I chased her around the house and caught her -- last time we ended up running a 5K before bed.0
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I'm apparently not worth the chase!0
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kept moving house so i couldnt stalk her anymore0
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Never cared where I went or what I did....0
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she went to rub-n'-tugs and did my best friend0
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Named his pecs after his protein shakes: Syntha and Cellucor0
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Made me watch so many stupid movies0
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she thought Prison s|u*s 3 was a stupid movie0
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He got a job as a Fluffer on a Porn Movie!
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she wouldnt hold my hand in public0
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i couldn't keep up with her crazy lifestyle.0
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Snores like a bear. And I REFUSE to sleep elsewhere.0
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Never combed her hair the other way!0
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Would forget to take his head warmer off when he went to the bank...tired of bailing him out0
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Every time he smile he would radiate and get me dizzy!
(And when with me he smiled constantly!
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she was out of my league0
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Burnt a piece of my toast....I refuse to have burnt toast appear at any time in my life, if I can help it.0
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She turned into a girl0
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She was too young and too girl!
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she kept bragging to her friends at the dinner party how i was hung like a horse. It was embarrasing0
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Wasnt old enough0
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I was too old...0
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