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We broke up because...
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He was too buff0
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She cut all her peas in half before eating them0
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She wouldn't have my babies0
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he wouldn't let me have his babies
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I couldn't get her preggaz!
![:\](https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/resources/emoji/confused.png ":\")
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She kept hiding my nutella
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she ate the last of my nutella
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She would come to Nutella-aholics anonymous with me0
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I had pocket sized nutella pouches in my purse.... she found them it didn't go down well I've stopped now though!
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Nutella junkie 0
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she preferred peanut butter 0
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She was a liar!
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She couldn't keep her story straight0
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she said our life was a book... and I was just a chapter that could be re written
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Didn't want to re write me into her story0
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he likes to pee off the balcony0
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Was too far into a fictional world0
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took reality a little too seriously... I needed laughter ;p0
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oh go lick yourself
he couldn't handle me 0 -
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she saw the birds about to take a dump on my head but didnt warn me0
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He had bad karma, birds pooped on him relentlessly0
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Got tired of the Cow bell! Wouldn't ever stop clanking it, even during sexy time!0
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would deliberately hug me tightly in front of guests so i end up farting0
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He had a problem with Flatulence and If I didnt help him he would seriously Explode!0
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She kept hugging me, REALLY tight.0
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Her eyebrows were fake!0
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I realized I like girls0
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He reminded me of a caveman!0
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