Anyone else have to struggle like me?
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So, I have been overweight since a kid. 164 lbs at age 9 and 218 by age 12. I was born into poverty. 25 years later I fought and escaped. I lost 120 pounds Biggest Loser style (literally, I was a contestant). But have found that 1 hour a day and watching calories simply doesn't cut it for me for losing weight. I put back on 25 lbs and although I am proud to still be down over 90, I just cannot fathom that my life requires 1-1.5 hours a day, plus saying below 1500 cals to MAINTAIN! Losing is a whole different game for me. Is there anyone else out there that just has to workout A LOT, and REALLY hard, and REALLY watch everything and cut out almost everything (grains, alcohol, etc) JUST TO lose weight. I saw a girl on Instagram and she lost 110 pounds in 11 months. I asker her how she did it, she said working out 2-3 hours a day, no alcohol, and low carb. I mean for those who REALLY struggle. Im talking those who have really had to fight for it-not just someone who got lazy and gained weight later in life. I am talking about those who have ALWAYS been overweight. Is this your life now? A daily fight? I am not complaining. I am just really trying to comprehend that it truly requires this much work to get and keep it off. ANYONE else out there relate? And yes I have had thryoid tc checked. If I work out hours a day, cut back cals, and do not drink I lose. If I workout 1 hour a day, watch cals, and even go out to eat 1-2 times a week, I gain or just maintain. CAN ANYONE relate?
My social worker told me to view overrating the way alcoholics view drinks. You take it one day at a time.
You've struggled a lot, and yeah it sucks, but reality sucks.
As for the hour a day exercising, maybe exercise harder? Heavier weights etc?0 -
So, I have been overweight since a kid. 164 lbs at age 9 and 218 by age 12. I was born into poverty. 25 years later I fought and escaped. I lost 120 pounds Biggest Loser style (literally, I was a contestant). But have found that 1 hour a day and watching calories simply doesn't cut it for me for losing weight. I put back on 25 lbs and although I am proud to still be down over 90, I just cannot fathom that my life requires 1-1.5 hours a day, plus saying below 1500 cals to MAINTAIN! Losing is a whole different game for me. Is there anyone else out there that just has to workout A LOT, and REALLY hard, and REALLY watch everything and cut out almost everything (grains, alcohol, etc) JUST TO lose weight. I saw a girl on Instagram and she lost 110 pounds in 11 months. I asker her how she did it, she said working out 2-3 hours a day, no alcohol, and low carb. I mean for those who REALLY struggle. Im talking those who have really had to fight for it-not just someone who got lazy and gained weight later in life. I am talking about those who have ALWAYS been overweight. Is this your life now? A daily fight? I am not complaining. I am just really trying to comprehend that it truly requires this much work to get and keep it off. ANYONE else out there relate? And yes I have had thryoid tc checked. If I work out hours a day, cut back cals, and do not drink I lose. If I workout 1 hour a day, watch cals, and even go out to eat 1-2 times a week, I gain or just maintain. CAN ANYONE relate?
Growing up I was the only overweight person in my family. Now, I'm the skinniest. It took a long time including hours at the gym but anyone can do iy0 -
Quit blaming everyone but the one who puts the food in your mouth. Sorry. Just reality.0
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And oh, by the way, I grew up in an 8 x 35 trailer and I don't blame it for my weight issues.0
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It takes a lot of self control.. I've been using this app for almost 4 years I managed to maintain myself now at a healthy weight. It's not easy but it's just a life style change I don't see it as being on a diet nor do I count my calories daily (I pretty much already know my intake)but I do try to work out 5 days a week and it seems to keep me at the heathy weight I should be.0
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Why are there so many mean people on these threads?0
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If the OP said something you don't like, that doesn't allow you to say something not nice back. She is clearly struggling and in a down/bad mood, no need to be picky on her words. << this doesn't allow her to say something bad too, we agree on that.
Anyway, don't let yourself be discouraged, everyone is different and what works for me maybe doesn't work for you. Maybe the problem for you is not just the carbs but something else too, there are so many nutrients in food. Track down what you eat and keep an overall view of the foods. If you weight daily and track that down too, you can maybe see a "pattern" ?
I'm not an expert so I can't say much, hope this helps or inspires some other advises.0 -
I have no excuses other than I just love food, it's like being a drug or alcohol addict the only difference is that you do not need drugs or alcohol to live so you can abstain from those whereas you obviously need to eat to live how can you abstain from food, it feels like a punishment. An alcoholic would find it difficult to drink in moderation or a drug addict to use in moderation but that is exactly what foodaholics have to do, yes it's difficult.0
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When you have a bad food day don't beat yourself up about it just say to yourself that was bad I'll do better tomorrow and keep going that is what I do.0
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OK, i'm a bit confused by this post...
Weight loss is HARD. End of. Do you have a medical condition which makes it near impossible to lose weight? If not, you should count yourself lucky because that truly is difficult.
We all struggle; in fact, losing weight is as much a mental thing as it is a physical thing. Take those with eating disorders for example, especially something like Binge Eating Disorder. I struggle with BED, and i can lose weight, but very slowly; for example, i'll lose 3lbs, binge and put on 1lb, eat healthily again and lose another 4lbs, then gain another 2lbs....and unless you've been there, you have no idea the mental 'difficulty' and hardship that comes with trying to keep control over something like that to lose weight.
I was very overweight as a kid, and then i lose all the weight after anorexia. It was going through recovery that i went in the complete opposite side of the scale and found myself binge eating, and ended up gaining 30lbs. So are you calling me lazy? Because i find that extremely insulting.
I feel like i'm rambling, but as i said, i'm a bit confused by this post and how to react about it. I know OP is just venting about how difficult it is, but the 'lazy' quote was out of order and actually quite offensive to everyone who has struggled with weight loss goals. We all struggle, you're not a special snowflake, and if it really is that difficult then go and get yourself checked out by a doctor and make sure there aren't any medical conditions stopping you from losing weight. I do wish you all the best, i really do, because i can appreciate how difficult it is and how disheartening it is to put in so much work and not see the result you want straight away, but you're not the only one who struggles. And that is one of the reasons MFP is such a great place, because there are people who are struggling who are willing to support each other.0 -
Woah. Why so many people being so resentful, bitter, and mean. Yes, sure, the OP spoke in a way that belittles the efforts of other people here, and fell into the trap and the bias of experiencing her own difficulties and struggles as supremely hard compared to that of others. So what? Let her know politely that everyone struggles, that everyone has to fight for their results, and that the size and nature of our difficulties are a completely subjective experience, and no one's are for some reason "so much more unfair" than everyone else's.
No need to be rude and poisonous.
As for people saying "Well, it's not like you need a cheeseburger...". Stop. You don't know what someone needs and doesn't need; there are people who have very strong psychological attachments to food, who have been comfort eating through hard times and developed emotional addictions. Don' be drill sergeants. Tough love is good, but it should still be love. Discreet condescension helps no one.
Finally, someone says "The OP asked for sympathy", as if that's a bad thing. It's not. We are all human, and need support and sympathy and attention and encouragement and comfort; some need more, some need less and are tougher and more decisive, and that's alright. We're not all as willful and weathered. Let her be.0 -
CrazyMermaid1 wrote: »Why are there so many mean people on these threads?
I am fairly new to mfp and this was my first thread. When I saw how negative some people were being towards the OP, I am not sure I want to continue with the "community" part of mfp.0 -
livieandevie wrote: »CrazyMermaid1 wrote: »Why are there so many mean people on these threads?
I am fairly new to mfp and this was my first thread. When I saw how negative some people were being towards the OP, I am not sure I want to continue with the "community" part of mfp.
A lot of it comes from people who have been here for a while (this is a new account, i've actually be lurking around here for a couple of years), and who have seen it all; so, so many posts from people saying how difficult it is for them and them alone, how they are SURE they are doing everything right but still can't lose weight, etc....a lot of these topics and the answers people need are there if they just use the search function, and so people get annoyed at having the answer the same things over and over again. But then again, i suppose just don't answer the post at all.
Also, a lot of people here practice the tough love approach. And, you have to remember, that just because someone says something you don't agree with, or is quite blunt about the way they say it, it doesn't mean that they are being nasty. Tough love. I know that i have posted posts like this in the past and received the same response, and at least now i can look back and understand why i got those responses and that the majority of them were justified.
There are lots of supportive people here, and as with anywhere on the internet, you will get the tolls. Don't let this put you off! No matter how blunt some people are, on the most part they are most definitely worth listening to as these are majoritively people who have been here for a while and know what they are talking about. They just don't take any of this whiny 'everyone it's so hard for me and me more so than any of you' attitude, because it is quite insulting to those of us who have struggled.
Forum etiquette can be quite difficult to master
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livieandevie wrote: »CrazyMermaid1 wrote: »Why are there so many mean people on these threads?
I am fairly new to mfp and this was my first thread. When I saw how negative some people were being towards the OP, I am not sure I want to continue with the "community" part of mfp.
There are still a lot of positive responses and even more helpful - if a little blunt - responses. Sadly around here you won't find people sugarcoating their answers, you'll find people giving helpful advice whether it is 'supportive' or not. I just think most of these people are telling the OP that she should change her attitude towards her weight loss. They don't think that they should support her way of thinking and are telling her so.
If this is your first thread then stick with it, there are a lot of other threads out there with some very helpful advice.
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Im talking those who have really had to fight for it-not just someone who got lazy and gained weight later in life. I am talking about those who have ALWAYS been overweight.
I think this was the offending sentence. Tbh they got overweight by the same way the people who have always been overweight except they started the lazy phase earlier.
They get rid of the weight in the same way.
Where they may differ slightly would be that a person overweight all their life has a longer experience of being overweight and may have less capacity/ skill or mental resilience to put a weight loss plan into action. This wouldnt be correct in all cases though and many who have put on the lazy weight could fin it just as hard as an overweight lifer.
Your distinction isnt really a good one , OP. Doesnt help by insuling many thousands on this site who pit on weight no diffently, want to get rid of it just as much and find it just as hard.0 -
NoIdea101NoIdea wrote: »livieandevie wrote: »CrazyMermaid1 wrote: »Why are there so many mean people on these threads?
I am fairly new to mfp and this was my first thread. When I saw how negative some people were being towards the OP, I am not sure I want to continue with the "community" part of mfp.
A lot of it comes from people who have been here for a while (this is a new account, i've actually be lurking around here for a couple of years), and who have seen it all; so, so many posts from people saying how difficult it is for them and them alone, how they are SURE they are doing everything right but still can't lose weight, etc....a lot of these topics and the answers people need are there if they just use the search function, and so people get annoyed at having the answer the same things over and over again. But then again, i suppose just don't answer the post at all.
Also, a lot of people here practice the tough love approach. And, you have to remember, that just because someone says something you don't agree with, or is quite blunt about the way they say it, it doesn't mean that they are being nasty. Tough love. I know that i have posted posts like this in the past and received the same response, and at least now i can look back and understand why i got those responses and that the majority of them were justified.
There are lots of supportive people here, and as with anywhere on the internet, you will get the tolls. Don't let this put you off! No matter how blunt some people are, on the most part they are most definitely worth listening to as these are majoritively people who have been here for a while and know what they are talking about. They just don't take any of this whiny 'everyone it's so hard for me and me more so than any of you' attitude, because it is quite insulting to those of us who have struggled.
Forum etiquette can be quite difficult to master
I suppose that I did not take the OP's post the way others did. It was the first one I read, and I identified with some of the things she said. I guess I am a little naive to think everyone would take it the same way i did. Thank you for your words :-D0 -
I echo everyone stepping in after the "negative nancy" jumped on.
Just to be blunt (and I am not one of them) MFP members are sarcastic and lack tact. Just know when you post to a thread it is up for scrutiny, debate and all out meanness. It is cyber space and folks hiding behind a computer screen (like me)... LOL
You ask why do they do it? Because they can! They will jump back and say just because you do not like what I said, does not make it un true, yadi, yadi yadi..
OP keep your head up and just ignore those folks that do not contribute in a manner no so pleasing.. 0 -
MarziPanda95 wrote: »livieandevie wrote: »CrazyMermaid1 wrote: »Why are there so many mean people on these threads?
I am fairly new to mfp and this was my first thread. When I saw how negative some people were being towards the OP, I am not sure I want to continue with the "community" part of mfp.
There are still a lot of positive responses and even more helpful - if a little blunt - responses. Sadly around here you won't find people sugarcoating their answers, you'll find people giving helpful advice whether it is 'supportive' or not. I just think most of these people are telling the OP that she should change her attitude towards her weight loss. They don't think that they should support her way of thinking and are telling her so.
If this is your first thread then stick with it, there are a lot of other threads out there with some very helpful advice.
Thank you for your kind and helpful words :-D
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livieandevie wrote: »CrazyMermaid1 wrote: »Why are there so many mean people on these threads?
I am fairly new to mfp and this was my first thread. When I saw how negative some people were being towards the OP, I am not sure I want to continue with the "community" part of mfp.
Welcome to the internet
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badgerbadger1 wrote: »livieandevie wrote: »CrazyMermaid1 wrote: »Why are there so many mean people on these threads?
I am fairly new to mfp and this was my first thread. When I saw how negative some people were being towards the OP, I am not sure I want to continue with the "community" part of mfp.
Welcome to the internet
Lol! Thanks!0
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