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    Yes or No : would you be pissed

    Posts: 411 Member
    edited November 2024 in Chit-Chat
    425am here. My pal calls me up, tells me he just found out his wife cheated on him before they got married 10 years ago. She also got an STD, which she covered up(told him the pill was for some type of infection).

    My question: would you be pissed..? Yes or No.

    Yes, was my reply.

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    Replies

    • Posts: 624 Member
      Yeah, but I've a short fuse
    • Posts: 3,665 Member
      oh yea. I'd be pissed. I think he has a hall pass now. I'm not sure I would get divorced or anything. do they have kids together?
    • Posts: 411 Member
      Yes, kids.
      griffk00 wrote: »
      oh yea. I'd be pissed. I think he has a hall pass now. I'm not sure I would get divorced or anything. do they have kids together?

    • Posts: 184 Member
      Nah, not after 10 years. Disappointed though, certainly.
    • Posts: 2,758 Member
      What's the whole point of getting angry on something that happened 10 years ago... Although about the STD, I'd be f**kin pissed! I would just hope this thing hadn't passed on to the children!
    • Posts: 411 Member
      I have to confess, I am curious how it plays out this weekend.
      The girl, has a guy she almost married, that pops in and out of the picture all the time. Was he the deed that had to be done 10 years ago..?

      LOL, it's soap opera like.
    • Posts: 144 Member
      I'd be very disappointed, but not pissed.
    • Posts: 285 Member
      I'd be pissed and I'm not one to really get pissed.

      I would be upset for 2 reasons: (1) they felt they couldn't tell me (I think I would be more disappointed than pissed), (2) they jeopardized my health by not fessing up and lying about an std (I would be very angry). Seriously, I hope your buddy has had an STD test because it's not uncommon for males to be asymptomatic.
    • Posts: 68 Member
      I'd be disappointed and pissed! They lied for all that time and were clearly unsure about getting married....what else have they been lying about? I'd want to know what STD it was too and if it was gone or not. Some can be treated but never go away.
    • Posts: 1,761 Member
      I would be hurt, but I mean 10 years together. They obviously love each other. Something that happened a decade ago is not something to jeopardize a life together. It could however be used for a bargain chip for a threesome. >:) jk. :p
    • Posts: 2,019 Member
      Id be more pissed about the std than the cheating. What else will they lie about.
    • Posts: 481 Member
      Oh god. I'd lose it.
    • Posts: 342 Member
      Yes, I would
    • Posts: 5,235 Member
      probably yes, but id go back to sleep if its waited ten years, then it can wait till morning.
    • Posts: 8,588 Member
      I would more hurt than anything. However 10 years later, that's a decade ago. I probably wouldn't end the marriage. Especially if she hasn't been cheating. But at the end of the day, they are the two in the covenant joined by God

      My best wishes and regards goes to them.
    • Posts: 3 Member
      I'd be more pissed about the STD than the 10-year-old cheating. I would be very disappointed in the cheating, but it obviously did not mean anything to her - it was a stupid mistake. If she hadn't loved your friend she wouldn't have married him. It would put a bit of a trust issue in for me, though. If I'd found out that my partner had cheated on me at the beginning of our relationship I would have a harder time trusting him now, even though it's been many years. It's a sucky thing to do, no matter what.
    • Posts: 69 Member
      So out of curiousity... what brought it up at 425 am? Or really I guess my question would be what happened last night to generate this disclosure? Obviously he (the friend) hasn't figured it out on his own in 10 yrs, so there must have been something said or something that happened that caused this conversation to occur.
    • Posts: 6 Member
      Yes, I would be. That's stupid.
    • Posts: 7,088 Member
      Yes I would be. Even though it was ten years ago, I'd still be mad
    • Posts: 4,088 Member
      I'd still be pissed, probably not as much as I would if it was more recent though. It definitely would make me question the last 10 years of our relationship.
    • Posts: 1,020 Member
      Yes. Off with their heads!
    • Posts: 3,225 Member
      Going crazy!!!
    • Posts: 109 Member
      I didn't care when I found out about my ex and a similar situation... we were doomed anyways lol.
    • Posts: 3,779 Member
      RedRockChic wrote: »
      So out of curiousity... what brought it up at 425 am? Or really I guess my question would be what happened last night to generate this disclosure? Obviously he (the friend) hasn't figured it out on his own in 10 yrs, so there must have been something said or something that happened that caused this conversation to occur.

      this is what i was wondering. why would she tell him now? were they fighting and she said this to hurt him?

      it's a complex question, because while it was 10 years ago, it's just a few hours ago to him. and he'll have to ultimately come to the realization that it was a long time ago, and whether or not that matters. And what was the context of the cheating? was it with a co-worker or someone she hangs out with to this day? or some random person, and does that matter.

      the STD... what was it, is it treated, is he still at risk, is he getting tested... all that.

      how old was she 10 years ago?

      honestly, i wouldn't be "pissed." i would be terribly disappointed. i would have to do some major thinking about the marriage, and if i could continue in it not only because she cheated and may have given me an STD, but because she lied about it for 10 years and the marriage began in a cloud of deception.

    • Posts: 8,646 Member
      I'd be livid...sure it's 10 years in the past...but that's no "minor" detail (in most relationship) to not tell someone.

      The not telling is just as bad as the act IMO. I have a list a mile long of stuff that I'd feel guilty about NOT telling my wife before not telling about getting an STD while cheating on her before we got married...
    • Posts: 8,680 Member
      999tigger wrote: »
      probably yes, but id go back to sleep if its waited ten years, then it can wait till morning.

      Yup
    • Posts: 31 Member
      I'd be pissed with the std part. The cheateing part after that long ya it would hurt but depending on how far into the relationship I was at the time would determin how upsert I'd be at that. And I personally don't believe in the once a cheater always a cheater statement. She probly was afraid of ruining there relationship so kept it a secret and it was probly eating away at her so she finally let it out.
    • Posts: 1,527 Member
      Cheating before you're married, I can let that slide. STD? I would be pissed!!
    • Posts: 57 Member
      PISSED, HURT, DEVASTATED. all in caps.
    • Posts: 8,680 Member
      Becka4prez wrote: »
      Cheating before you're married, I can let that slide. STD? I would be pissed!!

      So you be find if you knew about the affair before marriage?

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