We broke up because...
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Everything was funny to her, even our times in the bedroom0
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he had no sense of humor0
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Laughed about everything...was never serious0
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Seriously... She finally realized that she was out of my league.0
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He brushed his hair constantly0
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she won every staring contest. and i hate to lose0
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I couldnt take a good enough selfie0
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She was all about her self, never thought of me0
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He called me all the time to tell me he was thinking of me. 50 calls a day!0
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He didnt take a pic of himself in heels0
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She only wanted to eat pasta!0
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She only cooked me meat, never any pasta0
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He didn't like that I was a scavenger and would get dinner off the side of the road, hey it's a lifestyle!0
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I would rather have her be a freegan and dumpster dive instead -- roadkill could be several hours old....0
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never brought home fresh meat0
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He's a two timer.0
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She kept turning the sprinklers on on me0
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She would not stop watching teletubbies!!!!!0
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She never believed that back in the day I was Tinkie Winkie0
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He was always on the go, I couldn't handle it any more.0
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She just couldn't handle me0
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He wanted me to carry him piggy back, i'm strong, but I got tired after a while.0
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I wasn't cool enough to wear glasses0
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He wasn't turtley enough for the turtle club either!0
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She knew too little about WWII fighter pilot drinking clubs (but she'll always be welcome)0
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He spent his whole time at some club I didn't know about, I'm thinking it was a fight club and he wanted me to come!0
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She all of the sudden started fights with me because she said she needed practice!0
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She got on a bus and just rode it….rode it far…and long0
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She talked dirty all of the time!0
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mmm dust, grime, filth…she just wouldn't clean!0
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