We broke up because...
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Only went out with him because I misread his name as "Baskins" and I really like ice cream.
Ended it when I found out the truth...0 -
Everything was a competition.0
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She would only let me wear stripes! I looked horrible in stripes!0
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She didn't like that I was a champion spelling bee champion and could out spell her. Bitter!0
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Thought she was a champion but couldn't perform where it counted........
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Caught him jello wrestling another lady, in the nude.0
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She only wrestled in Metal Armor0
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When she said "my body was banging" I didn't realize she meant banging her in the head.0
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His hands were always oily...0
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He hated my job as a Masseuse and got super jealous!0
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She didn't charge for happy endings! How am I supposed to be a kept lady if she's giving it away for free?0
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He wouldn't stop massaging my taint0
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He was always riding the bike0
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Not as beasty as lead to believe.
More meow than rawrz.0 -
didnt like that i didnt ride0
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He wasn't my ride or die0
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He didn't get me sense of humour0
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Laughed at my expense0
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he always thought I was laughing at him0
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She was wittier than me0
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It wasn't me, it was him0
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neck hurt from looking up all the time0
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He never took his hat off0
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She became a lesbian pirate and left me to scissor her timbers.0
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I didnt like my Timbers getting Scissored! ;p0
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Too dark for me0
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She was practicing Witchcraft in my home! 0
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