Are you honest about how much you currently weigh / did way weigh with your partner?

melissakunimitsu9232
melissakunimitsu9232 Posts: 13 Member
edited November 22 in Motivation and Support
I've just gotten off to a good start on my weight loss journey. I was weighing myself yesterday morning while chatting with my husband and I was thrilled by a good reading so I told him how much I'd lost and remarked that it was more than I'd aimed for or expected. And then he asked the dreaded question "So, how much do you weigh?" I froze then freaked out and declared it a secret then stood there with my foot covering the readout panel. My husband knows I really big but the thought of him putting a number on what I've let happen to myself terrified me. He tried to guess and was way off the mark. Maybe I'll be able to tell him once I've finally lost it, I don't know. On the flip side he is honest about his weight with me. He's a little over by Asian standards but not too bad by Australian standards (I'm an Aussie).
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Replies

  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,242 Member
    Haahaa my husband knows way more than he probably cares to about how much I weigh and have weighed!
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    I just tell him the number... no big deal. *shrug*
  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,573 Member
    Once I lost it, I didn't care. He knows how much I weigh now and how much I've lost...so he has to know that I was at least his weight or heavier when we met. Many people still don't discuss it because it doesn't matter, and if you want to keep it private that is your prerogative.
  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,088 Member
    Yeah I remember that feeling all too well! When I first started I would only weigh myself when I knew he couldn't walk in the room. I couldn't bring myself to talk about the actual numbers then.
    But now , I don't mind. I'm 135lbs and weigh myself at the gym in the locker room , in front of all the women and at home in front of the husband. So the good news is, you won't feel like this for long. Soon , you'll have no problem talking about the numbers because you'll be proud of yourself !
    So keep up the good work !!
  • melissakunimitsu9232
    melissakunimitsu9232 Posts: 13 Member
    randomtai wrote: »
    I just tell him the number... no big deal. *shrug*

    It should be no big deal. I was surprised by how much I freaked out. My husband does know way more than he'd probably like to through having to accompany me on Doctors visits due to language barriers.
  • Ninkyou
    Ninkyou Posts: 6,666 Member
    Yes. I tell him even when I only lose .2 lbs
  • CoachJen71
    CoachJen71 Posts: 1,200 Member
    Hubby and I tell each other nearly every day.
  • melissakunimitsu9232
    melissakunimitsu9232 Posts: 13 Member


    thorsmom01 wrote: »
    So the good news is, you won't feel like this for long. Soon , you'll have no problem talking about the numbers because you'll be proud of yourself !

    I've got a lot to loose. Probably once I've lost a solid chunk of it I won't be able resist bragging to him and my family. The thought of my parents or sisters knowing my current weight also makes me squirm. I guess it's just that my weight is an emotional hot button for me (and plenty of other people too)
  • AZnewbie00
    AZnewbie00 Posts: 70 Member
    My husband knows how much I weigh and I am very honest with him about how much I gain or lose. I feel its helps me be accountable. He is very open with his weight too.
  • Zombella
    Zombella Posts: 491 Member
    For some reason I don't want to weigh myself with my husband in the room but he knows how big I've been so I'm not sure why I even care? He was there when I cried when I heard how much I weighed at the highest weight that I know that I was.
  • oh_happy_day
    oh_happy_day Posts: 1,137 Member
    Mine is usually still half-asleep when I weigh myself in the mornings. I still tell him because l like to share my victories, even small ones. I doubt he clearly remembers these conversations though :p
  • minkky
    minkky Posts: 73 Member
    I tell my hubby when I lose weight, but not that much. I would never tell him how much I weigh though. Maybe if I was in onederland ... I just don't feel it's his business. I consider it more of a girlfriend/bestie conversation.
  • sls450
    sls450 Posts: 20 Member
    your weight is only your relationship with gravity
  • Achaila
    Achaila Posts: 264 Member
    I've never felt ashamed with my partner. But one day he told me how much he weighs and I realized I was 20 pounds heavier than him and felt a ridiculous sense of shame. I don't care tho. He doesn't care how much I weigh so, fat or thin he's just like "as long as you're happy and healthy."
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    Yes. I've stuck his **** in my *** so a number on a scale is hardly a blip on the radar.
  • MKEgal
    MKEgal Posts: 3,250 Member
    The closest thing I have to a partner has been on MFP along with me, and we often go walking together, and we
    used to go to the gym together, and we frequently compare weight & how much we've lost.
    In addition to all that, my weight is on my profile, and ticker.

    I've had other people ask how much I've lost, and I'm OK with that, but I think for a stranger I wouldn't tell my
    current weight.

    .
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  • melissakunimitsu9232
    melissakunimitsu9232 Posts: 13 Member
    AZnewbie00 wrote: »
    My husband knows how much I weigh and I am very honest with him about how much I gain or lose. I feel its helps me be accountable. He is very open with his weight too.

    That's a good attitude to have.
  • retirehappy
    retirehappy Posts: 4,757 Member
    edited July 2015
    Hubby and I have a note pad by the scale for daily logging of weight. There have been times when I weighed more than he does and he is 6' while I am 5'3".

    Standing in my truth has helped me with weight and personal financial issues, I have no intention of not being truthful. It did hurt coming clean originally, but now, it is just how we live.
  • z304
    z304 Posts: 84 Member
    Yep. He knows when I gain or lose, and I know when he gains or loses. We encourage each other to keep working towards our fitness goals more than we talk about weight though- weight more comes up occasionally, we talk about working out and eating better at least every few days (aside from the last few weeks when every time I exercise he hears about it immediately, sometimes via a snapchat of me disgusting and sweaty when I've just stepped off a treadmill lmao).

    Also, I would feel weird deliberately not telling him something.
  • IILikeToMoveItMoveIt
    IILikeToMoveItMoveIt Posts: 1,172 Member
    My husband has flat out told me he's sick of hearing me talk about my losses and struggles...he tolerates it when I do and when I loose more he says good job...He says he doesn't care how I look that I'm sexy no matter what though it comes out kinda robotic sounding at times...I told him I'm not ugly, just fat. I still get hit on etc. just not on the same scale. Point is, he's a supportive as he can be and I don't care that he knows... Do what you feel comfortable with. My best friends wife if almost 400 lbs, I knew that before he told me...so it's not like he or I don't know she's already a high number. They've been together 18 ish years and she was bigger when they met, if that helps...
  • _cdaley
    _cdaley Posts: 79 Member
    My boyfriend and I have lost weight together, so he knows. I weigh myself first thing in the morning and if I lost I usually text him at work about it. He probably gets annoyed by it, actually. Maybe I should adopt a bit of your method and keep it to myself, haha. Way to go on the weight loss, btw!
  • Lourdesong
    Lourdesong Posts: 1,492 Member
    edited July 2015
    Nope, never. As in, I've never said "I weigh x". However, he knows how much weight I've lost, and once I told him how much % smaller the MFP app says I am, and then right after I did, it hit me that he could easily do the math and figure out my starting weight from that % number and from knowing the amount of weight I lost.

    Of course, he could also easily just go into the MFP app or website and find out if he's nosy. I'm always logged in. He could also snoop at Fitbit.

    I've lost over 100 lbs, and I think what has concerned me more than anything is him thinking I was much heavier than I was at my starting weight. My starting weight was a big number, but I don't like the idea of any presumption that it was even bigger than it actually was. Still, I'm not concerned enough to bring it up, and he doesn't and hasn't asked, so... yeah. I'm not sure what I would do if he did. I'd like to think I'd be open, but given that I never have been open about it with him I really don't know.

    ETA: He also knows my BMI and height, so yeah, he could also mosey over to a bmi chart and put 2+2 together as well.
  • rebeccaEsmith
    rebeccaEsmith Posts: 1,136 Member
    My husband and I train together and weigh in on the same day, at first it was hard knowing the fact there was a 10kg difference between us (him heavier) where now there is more of a cap and he can see how much hard work I am putting in to get the results I want.
  • RegainFiks
    RegainFiks Posts: 180 Member
    My husband doesn't know I am just too embarrassed of the number, I will tell him once I have lost the weight.
  • xX_PhoenixRising_Xx
    xX_PhoenixRising_Xx Posts: 623 Member
    My husband knew at my highest and he knows now - I'm 70kg lighter than I started and maintaining. The further I got from my start weight the less I minded other people knowing where I started . I'm pretty open about my weight these days.
  • lovabee
    lovabee Posts: 30 Member
    I have always been open about how much I weigh. I used to be 200 lbs, now I'm around 150lbs and I never had problems with telling people how much I weigh even when I was at my highest. It's basically just putting a number to what they can already see...
  • Becca_250
    Becca_250 Posts: 188 Member
    I know the feeling, I refused to tell my partner what my weight was until it was the same as his weight. It now is, so he now knows what I weigh and how much I lost (and how much more to go!). Seems trivial now but I remember just feeling too ashamed to admit it in the beginning.
  • gothomson
    gothomson Posts: 215 Member
    I have a story to tell. When I was overweight I put up the exact amount I weighed in mfp when I started (though I’d lost 7lb prior to joining) and I religiously put in my weight every week; up or down. I have now reached my weight goal and I don’t record my weight every week unless I put on a lot – to me “a lot” is a gain of 4 – 5lb then I work it back to the weight I want to be (175lb). But I don’t tell my wife. At first she was supportive then she started saying I’d lost too much. She admits that most of this is through jealousy that I lost so much weight – 45lb, so if I go less than 175lb – and I do sometimes – and she asks if I’ve lost more I say “no”. Fact is I’ll put it back on again so it only temporary anyway.

    Bottom line: I still weigh myself every week and log my food but for the sake of not going through the “you’ve lost too much weight” over a couple of pounds I tend to keep my weight to myself and MFP.
  • icck
    icck Posts: 197 Member
    It's never really bothered me, but then he's far heavier than I am - he hasn't a clue what he weighs, but it's a good 20-25kg more than I do, so it wouldn't even occur to me to be bothered by my own weight. We're both obese. Maybe if he were slimmer it could bother me, I guess, but I can't imagine keeping it a secret.
    That said he's never asked, and likely never will. It just isn't something we talk about.
  • mystgrl1604
    mystgrl1604 Posts: 117 Member
    sls450 wrote: »
    your weight is only your relationship with gravity

    WORD! Hahahaha!

    Both my boyfriend and I started our weight loss journey together so we each took each others measurements and weights and everything. It was very embarrassing for me as he's a big muscly guy with just a bit of podge on him while I'm a big fatty with little to no muscle on me, but he's been so supportive! And I can't tell you how much relief it gives me that he accepts all of me no matter how big I am.

    We've been at it 3months and he's lost 10kg and is only 6kg away from his goal weight of 110kg and here I am. Lost 5.6lbs and still 100+ to lose. I joke with him that he's not allowed to weight less than me (I'm 110kg). I'm glad that's his goal weight. Sometimes I moan about the fact that he's dropping the kgs like it's nothing while I struggle to drop even one, but he's been active all his life and his metabolism is all revved up, while I've been sedentary all my life and has just started getting a wee bit active.

    My point is, it was very hard for me to agree to let him do my measurements, but the relief that came after he knew was immeasurable. I had nothing left to hide, not even my red face. Hahahaha!
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