We broke up because...

Swam off with the cruise ship entertainment director

swam off with the cruise ship captain - we needed Coast guard assist to get back to dry land

She was always using big words for things that could be summed up easier. For example, one time, when we were discussing having a fear of the ocean....she kept calling it thass...thalla......thalast......thelassandaphobia........something like that

didn't like tuna

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I wanted to move in with her and her non ex....but they would have none of it

he didn't know his multiplication tables...............

Always spoke using big words!

Her mother wasnt a fan of me

She claimed I always poked her eye, but i'm a girl!

Wasn't really into girls

Couldn't handle my risqué behavior

Well like the State Farm commercial says...."well she's a guy..."

didn't like to party.

Her parents didn't accept me.