I am so scared...

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Replies

  • jokoh92
    jokoh92 Posts: 112 Member
    rockmama72 wrote: »
    I had a good long think about this topic yesterday. I'm 43, and in my teen-through adult life I've ranged from quite thin to a bit chunky. I've lost over 30 pounds twice in my life through exercise and food control. (Not counting calories, but just "watching it.") And then a LOT of other times I've taken off 5 or 10 pounds and then gained back 10 or 5. And then a little more...

    When I look back at the times where I was at a healthy BMI and maintaining, what was the trick?

    It was getting regular exercise. I am naturally lazy, so this is big for me to admit! Sure I can lose weight by counting calories alone. And I have done, over and over and over! But it's the exercise habit that kept ME going in those glorious times of thinhood. It gave me energy, confidence and motivation to eat better, drink less alcohol, etc.

    I'm crossing my fingers that this time it sticks. It sounds sad that I can't fully commit, but it's the hard truth... It's all up to me! I have to find it within myself to form habits that I keep forever.

    I totally am with you on the lazy thing. I have spent most of my life just being a couch potato but once I got serious about working out, I realized how much better I felt and how easier it was to lose or maintain my weight loss versus just cutting calories.

    I’m hoping though that once I get to my goal weight and add on some muscle mass that the workouts will not seem so much as working out and seem more like just taking a shower or brushing my teeth.

    I don’t think though I will ever understand why bad habits are so hard to break and good habits are so hard to keep lol
  • jokoh92
    jokoh92 Posts: 112 Member
    Bonny132 wrote: »
    I think we need to deal with it as an eating disorder, lets face it we know we over eat. Sometimes for comfort, sometimes because the food just tastes so good, but we know we overeat, therefore we cannot trust ourself once we get to goal to keep on track without supervision. We need some accountability, which an app such as MFP offers. We all know that it is not going to be easy to loose the weight, and even harder to keep it off, as we might relax our habits a bit and there comes the slippery slope and the pounds comes back on again.

    I think we all need a plan for what to do once we have reached goal (apart from the massive shopping trip) How will we keep it off? Tracking, exercise, a mix? Without a plan and sticking to it, I do think the majority will be putting a considerable amount of weight back on again. A lot of us have been overweight for the majority of our lives, being slim and fit will be a new experience, fun yes, but new to us.

    So for me, I am not treating this like a diet, this is a lifestyle, I treat myself, I go out, I do not deprive myself, I work my butt off in the gym, eat healthily most of the time and have made new habits, such as walking a lot and cycling instead of taking the bus/public transport. I think it is all about making long term plans and starting to incorporate them now and making them part of your lifestyle, so when maintenance comes you have your base already in place.

    My gym work consists of a lot of weight work and some cardio as I want to build muscles and tone up. If you compare 1 lb of fat to 1 lb of muscle it is like comparing a grape to a raisin size wise.

    Yes! I totally agree but I just wonder can I learn to be accountable without counting calories or will I always need MFP or some other calorie counting tool?

    Even though it’s a great tool for weight loss and I don’t know what I would do without MFP, I don’t want it to always consume my life. I want to be able to know how much to eat on my own. I know with being an obese person all my life, its going to be hard and almost impossible but I feel like having to depend on anything all the time is a bad way to live after a while.

    5-10 years of this, I’m all for but 20-30 years down the line, I just don’t know.

    Right now I don’t have kids or a husband or even a career really to consume my life, so its easy for me to log every day with no problem. But when the family comes a long and when I get into my big career, I sometimes wonder if I am going to have time for it.

    That is why I want to learn how to do this independently but I know right now or even five years from now, that’s not going to happen but I hope that one day it will come naturally to me like it does with naturally thin or fit people.
  • jokoh92
    jokoh92 Posts: 112 Member
    Depends on you! The reason your wanting the weight loss..temporary for reunion or a fad etc or is it a true life change for you? I have seen people use the "quick" weight loss methods and programs like WW, Jenny Craig and the thousand more out there! They usually gain the weight back because those programs are not setup for long term use. Long term weight loss comes from your choice and lifestyle! Hardwork, dedication, healthy eating choices, willpower, mental motivation....YOU HAVE TO WANT IT FOR YOU! After a while it becomes who u are which makes it your life style change..

    This is definitely for the long haul but I can’t say it started out that way. In the beginning it was for the short term and dealt with rage and vanity reasons but after years and years of this, I have come to realize that those things are so trivial now and pointless.

    Now I am doing this because I want to live a long healthy life and I want to not only see my grandchildren and possibly great grandchildren one day but I also want to play with them and be active with them. I want to be a testament to them and for them to see that no matter what they may go through, they can succeed even if it takes over five, ten, fifteen years to do it. Success has no time limit.
  • jokoh92
    jokoh92 Posts: 112 Member
    Versacam wrote: »
    I lost a lot of weight about 7yrs ago (100lbs roughly). I distinctly remember laying in bed one morning and admiring my slim tummy and saying to myself "No way am I ever getting fat again". Well... I got fat again. :( In some ways I think that people get complacent and it's not until you have regained weight that you realise that you approached it the wrong way.

    The fact you are considering this now is great!

    I also think exercise is key. When you lose weight exercise is easier and more enjoyable and unless you want to count calories forever, then it's a good way to control weight.

    This time, once I get to goal, I will give myself an upper weight limit or fat % to stick to.. maybe 7lbs, or 1% body fat.. I will weigh myself every day like I already do now and track it.. if it gets to my upper limit then I have to "diet".

    Sounds exactly like what happened to me except I wasn’t quite at the slim tummy phase. I still had miles to go but I was getting there and I started letting people feel my head up and it cost me two years I could have been working on or possibly at my weight loss goal.

    I think between ceasing the exercise and logging, I gained it all back rapidly but had I just kept doing one or the other, I probably would have not gained so quickly and eventually got back on course.

    But you live and you learn and I’ve learned that while I need to do both, if for some reason I can’t do both, at least keep doing one no matter what.

    But I definitely think exercise is really important in keeping the weight from creeping back up.
  • jokoh92
    jokoh92 Posts: 112 Member
    WBB55 wrote: »
    So I thought I'd share my experience.

    Lost 100 lbs 7-9 years ago (down from a size 24 to a women's size 6 bottom, size small top in two years of weight loss). Kept it off +/-10 lbs for 3 years. There was a funeral in there, so there was plenty of stress I managed. Kept it off mainly by eating like I was more-or-less still on the diet during the week, but ate treats on the weekend.

    THEN the smoking ban went into effect and I started going out to bars again. Gained a few pounds. No biggie, I'd stopped running, so I joined roller derby to stay active. At first I didn't really gain or lose weight, maybe 5 lbs of muscle and lost 5lbs of fat. But then I wanted to put on some more muscle to increase performance, so I gained 15 lbs (10 of which were muscle -- now a size 8/10 bottom but still - usually - a size small top). So there I was 20 lbs heavier than my lowest weight. But fairly happy since really I didn't much go up in size (except for my glutes, which I needed larger for my sport). Then injuries. Then I quit drinking. Fast forward a little to a year ago. 33 of the 100 lbs re-gained (back to size 10/12). But that's ok, since I already knew how to lose weight and keep it off. So I'm losing again, running, reffing. Lost 12 lbs so far of the total regain and haven't lost any muscle, by my measurements. (Back into the size 8s now.) I'd say it's way easier now to lose weight since I have more muscle than last time. My BMR is way higher than before (but I'd put on those 10-15 lbs of muscle, keep in mind).

    But honestly, at my lowest weight my body fat% was still quite high. What I'm working towards this time is that goal weight, but a lower body percent, too. We're NEVER going to be a finished product. It's worth the effort to maintain. It's worth the effort to stay active.

    That is exactly what I am trying to do. I am trying to lose most of my excess body fat and eventually want to gain at least 15-20lbs of muscle mass. I’m estimating 125lbs will get me where I need to be as far as losing most of the excess body fat and gaining 20lbs of muscle will put me at 145lbs but I will still look fairly healthy hopefully. But I won’t know where I need to be until I cross that bridge so for now I am just going to continue to focus on losing the fat.
  • jokoh92
    jokoh92 Posts: 112 Member
    DataSeven wrote: »
    I have lost 128 lbs in the past year and a half. I can't see how I can regain the weight as long as I don't go back to my old ways.

    Wow congratulations on the weight loss! That is so inspiring. And you shouldn’t as long as you stay on top of it like other posters have said.
  • jokoh92
    jokoh92 Posts: 112 Member
    I resent that kind of studies. They are not helpful for people who need to be inspired, not told they are most likely to fail, and they do not take into account what the subjects may have done to maintain or regain weight. I really don't understand what they are good for. They show that we as a population are gaining weight, but we already knew that.

    The good thing is that the body doesn't want or remember a particular weight - but habits are hard indeed to break. Once we get down to a comfortable weight, it's easy to forget what brought us there, and that we need to do the same to stay there. And most of us who had to lose weight, like to eat, and it's easy to overeat if we aren't careful.

    The studies aren't done to inspire people, they are done by doctors and scientists so that they can understand the problems and challenges. That understanding ultimately leads to useful interventions. I suggest the problem isn't the study, but the media's presentation.

    Some research suggests that the body does have a set point and that the body does try to regulate weight. Body chemistry does change when in deficit for long periods. This chemistry change drives the body to try to get back to previous fat levels. However, physiology is only part of the equation. There is also psychological/behavioral. It is pretty obvious from the number of success stories that one can overcome this set point via behavior. This is what many people here are saying - you have to continue to be vigilant when you reach your goal weight. Going back to the habits that got you overweight in the first place will give you the same result you had the first time...weight gain.

    I saw a special on HBO once about how when you start getting toward about 20% of weight lost, your brain and your body try tricking you into thinking you're way hungrier than you really are in an effort to get back to your original weight (and then some). It goes into defense mode, so to speak. They also said that once you've programmed your body to be that heavy, it will always want to go back to that weight and there's no way to stop that other than with drugs that aren't approved by the FDA.

    This definitely happened with me once I hit roughly the 30 lbs lost mark. My weight loss stalled and I felt like I was starving at all times, even after a decent meal. I powered through it and came out ok on the other side, but I was glad I had seen that special. Maybe it was just a cooincidence, but the science does make sense if it's really true.

    I think that is what I am going through now. I have lost a little over 20% of my body weight since I started last July and I feel like an animal at times with the cravings I get especially when I am hormonal.

    I could drink a gallon or more of water after a meal and still be hungry. I am trying to push pass it because I know its more mental than anything else but sometimes its almost unbearable. I hope this phase ends soon.
  • ebbingfat
    ebbingfat Posts: 117 Member
    edited August 2015
    I tend to take statistics about weight regain with a grain of salt because there are so many factors that could apply to the people used in the statistics that may not apply to me.

    The first being, how much weight did the people lose in the first place? If somebody is 20 pounds overweight, loses it, and then eventually gains it back that is a lot different than if someone is 120 pounds overweight and loses that. If statistics include smaller losses, then that would definitely at least partially explain why "most" people gain their weight back. I don't feel like it's too uncommon for someone to gain or lose 20 pounds depending on what's going on in their life. Whereas if I were to lose the 120 that I want to lose, it would take time for me to gain all that back, and I feel like it would just be less likely to happen.

    On top of that, you've got to consider how the people involved in the statistics lost weight. There are so, so many people who lose a lot of weight through some sort of crash or fad diet. My sister and her husband are a good example of this. They both lost probably about 50 pounds on the Atkins diet, only to eventually gain most of it back. The reason was because for them, Atkins wasn't sustainable. It wasn't how they wanted to live their lives. They dieted, and once they got to a weight they wanted to be at, they started eating "normal" again and gained it back. This is why it's very important, in my opinion, to take it slow and eat in ways you'd be comfortable eating your whole life. I don't cut foods out of my diet, no matter how junky they are. I just learn to make healthier choices where I can, and portion better.

    For example, I used to live on Mountain Dew. I know that it's bad for me, so in the past I've always tried cutting out soda when I want to lose weight. Eventually, I give up and start drinking it again. This time, I've just switched to the diet version. I used to not be able to stand the stuff, but after a week of drinking it in place of the non-diet stuff, I like it just fine. Would it be better if I only drank water for the rest of my life? Sure. Would I ever sustain that? No. I can, however, comfortably sustain drinking diet soda instead of regular. That easily cuts out a bunch of excess calories. Another thing that has never jived with me are salads. I used to always try to replace my lunch with salad, and would eventually get sick of it and stop. Now I have what I want for lunch, even if it's something junky like pizza rolls, but I just limit myself to a serving and have some veggies (typically carrots and cauliflower) on the side.

    It's easier to sustain a style of eating if you don't feel like you're missing out. And if you can sustain the style of eating you lost weight on, then you should be able to sustain your weight loss.
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
    jokoh92 wrote: »
    I have been reading up on some articles that say the likelihood of regaining weight is greater than keeping it off long term, especially for those who have always been overweight or obese.

    I can't imagine getting down to my goal weight only to regain most of it back. I think that would kill me.

    According to some sources, most people who have kept the weight loss off for a significant amount of years was either once small or fit to begin with.

    I have never been small, even at 3 I was chubby. So its like will my body just eventually go back to being what it knows best?

    You sound as though you are reading yourself into trouble amd starting to prepare your min for excuses into not doing something.

    A high % of people will regain because they dont adopt a lifestyle change and fail to realise a larger task is not losing but keeping the weight off. You should be ready to protect your losses if its importnat to you. There are many examples of people on this forum who maintain successfully.

    What you need to realise you will be 100% overweight if you do not eat less and lose the weight, so dont let it be an excuse to do nothing. Do get smart and learn that maintaining is a bigger challenge. Take it one day at a time and focus on what you want and what you have to do.
  • xX_PhoenixRising_Xx
    xX_PhoenixRising_Xx Posts: 623 Member
    I was obese my whole life. I lost 155 lbs over 2 years of actively trying to lose, and I have been successfully maintaining for a year now. I made sustainable changes while I was losing weight.

    I still weigh portion sizes 99% of the time and I roughly track in my head rather than logging all food on MFP. I thought I was going to have to log everything forever, but I track maybe 2 or 3 days a week on here now. My head counts even when I don't log, turns out I can't switch that off! (Not that I would).

    I am always aware of what I'm eating. I actually went a few months not tracking at all and didn't gain weight, but I don't want to get complacent. I am very aware of how quickly the weight could sneak back on, but I eat much differently now to what I ate before! I still enjoy food, I think the key really is moderation and portion control. And to keep moving!
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    Very interesting and important thread. Thanks, all.

    Did a bit of googling and found this:

    http://ajcn.nutrition.org/content/82/1/222S.long

    "There is a general perception that almost no one succeeds in long-term maintenance of weight loss. However, research has shown that ≈20% of overweight individuals are successful at long-term weight loss when defined as losing at least 10% of initial body weight and maintaining the loss for at least 1 y. The National Weight Control Registry provides information about the strategies used by successful weight loss maintainers to achieve and maintain long-term weight loss. National Weight Control Registry members have lost an average of 33 kg and maintained the loss for more than 5 y. To maintain their weight loss, members report engaging in high levels of physical activity (≈1 h/d), eating a low-calorie, low-fat diet, eating breakfast regularly, self-monitoring weight, and maintaining a consistent eating pattern across weekdays and weekends. Moreover, weight loss maintenance may get easier over time; after individuals have successfully maintained their weight loss for 2–5 y, the chance of longer-term success greatly increases. Continued adherence to diet and exercise strategies, low levels of depression and disinhibition, and medical triggers for weight loss are also associated with long-term success. National Weight Control Registry members provide evidence that long-term weight loss maintenance is possible and help identify the specific approaches associated with long-term success."

  • DeguelloTex
    DeguelloTex Posts: 6,652 Member
    Orphia wrote: »
    Very interesting and important thread. Thanks, all.

    Did a bit of googling and found this:

    http://ajcn.nutrition.org/content/82/1/222S.long

    "There is a general perception that almost no one succeeds in long-term maintenance of weight loss. However, research has shown that ≈20% of overweight individuals are successful at long-term weight loss when defined as losing at least 10% of initial body weight and maintaining the loss for at least 1 y. The National Weight Control Registry provides information about the strategies used by successful weight loss maintainers to achieve and maintain long-term weight loss. National Weight Control Registry members have lost an average of 33 kg and maintained the loss for more than 5 y. To maintain their weight loss, members report engaging in high levels of physical activity (≈1 h/d), eating a low-calorie, low-fat diet, eating breakfast regularly, self-monitoring weight, and maintaining a consistent eating pattern across weekdays and weekends. Moreover, weight loss maintenance may get easier over time; after individuals have successfully maintained their weight loss for 2–5 y, the chance of longer-term success greatly increases. Continued adherence to diet and exercise strategies, low levels of depression and disinhibition, and medical triggers for weight loss are also associated with long-term success. National Weight Control Registry members provide evidence that long-term weight loss maintenance is possible and help identify the specific approaches associated with long-term success."
    To be fair, I doubt NWCR members are a random sample of those trying to lose weight. Though I do hear that some of them are very tall and charming.

  • vivmom2014
    vivmom2014 Posts: 1,649 Member
    JoRocka wrote: »
    don't over think it- just do the things and then keep doing the things.

    It's not that hard to get on track once you have the habits firmly established.

    I'd also not get to wrapped up in reading fitness articles- they wind up distracting you from the focus. Training/technique articles yes- but fitness/health/wellness- they get you in to a state of what I call "frothing" where you're churning up a lot of thoughts intentions and emotions and drive- but the reality is this is a slow process- so getting yourself all lathered up into any sort of frenzy just makes you feel inadequate and frustrated that you aren't doing enough- when you probably are. "Doing enough" is usually less than you think- and LONGER than you plan. Most people think "doing enough" is DO ALL THIS STUFF- but they only do it for a week or two- and then wonder why they weren't successful.

    Slow down- small changes- take your time.

    JoRocka, you rocka!!!! Thanks for this.

    Also, is there any correlation between how slowly the weight was lost and long-term prospects of keeping it off? I wonder.

  • suzettedees
    suzettedees Posts: 85 Member
    Your story sounds similar to mine. I've been healthy and fit and I've been chunky and unfit. I'm back on the journey to healthy and fit again.

    There are alot of informative comments that people have made. So I'm only going to comment on your comment of being naturally lazy. I sometimes think that about myself too too but, I have been weight lifting and love it. It gives me time to focus on me and not my family, my job or anything else. I do cardio workouts too but, it's not the same feeling I get. Find an exercise you love, it doesn't matter if it's walking, swimming , bowling, or volleyball.if you love it you will continue to do it.

    I have a busy household, 3 kids a husband 2 dogs a cat and a job. Something I am learning is making myself and my needs a priority. When I feel good, my family feels good too.

    I'm not looking for a temporary fix, I know there will be times when I eat to much and times when I'm sick and can't exercise but, I'm looking to change me life and be an active participant in my life.

    Good luck on your journey.
  • megantischner
    megantischner Posts: 85 Member
    Someone in another thread compared continuing to log after maintenance to getting glasses. Nobody thinks twice about needing help to see. A food scale and MFP help me to stay normal sized. I'm still hoping that one day I'll learn to eat like this on my own, but one year into maintenance I'm still having to make decisions on what not to eat and what fits into my goals. If I have to always track, then that's what I'll do. It's just not my preferred path. In any case, I don't intend to be one of those statistics...So whatever that means I need to do, I'll do.
    This is a great way to put it! At least for me, this really resonates. Thanks for sharing.
  • Orphia
    Orphia Posts: 7,097 Member
    I resent that kind of studies. They are not helpful for people who need to be inspired, not told they are most likely to fail, and they do not take into account what the subjects may have done to maintain or regain weight. I really don't understand what they are good for. They show that we as a population are gaining weight, but we already knew that.

    The good thing is that the body doesn't want or remember a particular weight - but habits are hard indeed to break. Once we get down to a comfortable weight, it's easy to forget what brought us there, and that we need to do the same to stay there. And most of us who had to lose weight, like to eat, and it's easy to overeat if we aren't careful.

    The studies aren't done to inspire people, they are done by doctors and scientists so that they can understand the problems and challenges. That understanding ultimately leads to useful interventions. I suggest the problem isn't the study, but the media's presentation.

    Some research suggests that the body does have a set point and that the body does try to regulate weight. Body chemistry does change when in deficit for long periods. This chemistry change drives the body to try to get back to previous fat levels. However, physiology is only part of the equation. There is also psychological/behavioral. It is pretty obvious from the number of success stories that one can overcome this set point via behavior. This is what many people here are saying - you have to continue to be vigilant when you reach your goal weight. Going back to the habits that got you overweight in the first place will give you the same result you had the first time...weight gain.

    I saw a special on HBO once about how when you start getting toward about 20% of weight lost, your brain and your body try tricking you into thinking you're way hungrier than you really are in an effort to get back to your original weight (and then some). It goes into defense mode, so to speak. They also said that once you've programmed your body to be that heavy, it will always want to go back to that weight and there's no way to stop that other than with drugs that aren't approved by the FDA.

    This definitely happened with me once I hit roughly the 30 lbs lost mark. My weight loss stalled and I felt like I was starving at all times, even after a decent meal. I powered through it and came out ok on the other side, but I was glad I had seen that special. Maybe it was just a cooincidence, but the science does make sense if it's really true.

    Does anyone know more about this? I googled hyperphagia and polyphagia and weight loss strings but didn't find anything like what's being said here.
  • 10075678
    10075678 Posts: 13 Member
    My mum lost 100lb in 2 years with Weight Watchers. Over 8 years, she regained most of that weight (She had stopped Weight Watchers). She had never been slim as a child, so from my experience, what these reports are saying resonate with me.

    However, I believe changing your mindset, determination, a good support network and a constant reminder (e.g. keeping a photo of how 'big' you were and how amazing you look now) should sway you from regaining.
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