More Women Than Men
Ashalahn_LMT
Posts: 342 Member
I have only been on MFP for a few weeks. Although I have been on other tracking websites for years. I have noticed there appear to be far more women using the tracking features than men, and exponentially more women posting on the forums than men. Rarely do I see a post from a guy asking for friends, support or motivation. Honestly, I rarely see many posts asking for help of any kind from guys. I am guilty of this. I don't think I've posted asking any questions, usually just supplying answers and advice.
Do you think this stems from the independent nature of us guys? Our stubborn, bull headed approach to life in general? Our inability to "ask for directions"? Are we really all self motivators, or do we just think we are? Or do we think we know it all?
Or is this because there is (in my opinion) far more pressure placed on women to lose weight, be thin, get skinny, etc? Guys seem to get a pass in many respects regarding their physical appearance.
Just a thought. Open for discussion, though please refrain from bashing the opposite sex (at least not too hard).
Do you think this stems from the independent nature of us guys? Our stubborn, bull headed approach to life in general? Our inability to "ask for directions"? Are we really all self motivators, or do we just think we are? Or do we think we know it all?
Or is this because there is (in my opinion) far more pressure placed on women to lose weight, be thin, get skinny, etc? Guys seem to get a pass in many respects regarding their physical appearance.
Just a thought. Open for discussion, though please refrain from bashing the opposite sex (at least not too hard).
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I think there is a huge amount of pressure on women to loose weight however not just from other people but we do it to our selves. Women are looked at as a sexy object. the taller skinnier and more beautiful she is the farther she will go in life. I don't see that when it comes to men so much. when a woman looks at a man most of them like meat on thier bones and when some one is going to have a man work for them they want some one with muscle. Society as a hole has put so many labels on everything that there is no way to be perfect you can have the best bosy in the world but some one will find a flaw in it. And as for the posting well we are women and we love to chat and let it out. Here you can say what you want and not worrie who is going to say what back to it. We can let out how we feel about some one not helping us or that stupid co worker where most of the time guys don't care. A bunch of guys work together and well they work together a bunch of women work together and there is back stabbing and I am better then you attitudes. So in general I feel it is just the over all of a woman is a woman and a man is a man ...Just my thoughts however.0
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God or bad guys just don't ask.0
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I think there is a huge amount of pressure on women to loose weight however not just from other people but we do it to our selves. Women are looked at as a sexy object. the taller skinnier and more beautiful she is the farther she will go in life. I don't see that when it comes to men so much. when a woman looks at a man most of them like meat on thier bones and when some one is going to have a man work for them they want some one with muscle. Society as a hole has put so many labels on everything that there is no way to be perfect you can have the best bosy in the world but some one will find a flaw in it. And as for the posting well we are women and we love to chat and let it out. Here you can say what you want and not worrie who is going to say what back to it. We can let out how we feel about some one not helping us or that stupid co worker where most of the time guys don't care. A bunch of guys work together and well they work together a bunch of women work together and there is back stabbing and I am better then you attitudes. So in general I feel it is just the over all of a woman is a woman and a man is a man ...Just my thoughts however.
Totally agree! It doesn't matter how thin or in shape I have been in the past, there have always been snide comments "well, you could work on THIS or THAT, and look even BETTER!" It just can't be, "Girl, you look amazing, great work!"
Men as a whole, from my experience, aren't usually the type to ask for much help.0 -
Personally I think a guy can weigh 300+ pounds, have a greasy 6 hair comb-cover that looks like a spider clutching an egg and wears suspenders...and thinks he is just one small step under Brad Pitt looks wise.
...and to those comb-over 300+ pound guys I meant no offense. You look good...really!0 -
They don't ask for directions and they won't ask for help. Sad0
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...and to the ladies that says we don't ask for help. Totally untrue. I often consult the instructions when building something...when i have an alarming amount of left-over parts, or it isn't working.0
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...and to the ladies that says we don't ask for help. Totally untrue. I often consult the instructions when building something...when i have an alarming amount of left-over parts, or it isn't working.
Those left over parts are extras, right? In case something breaks? And honestly, have you tried reading those instructions? Part A into slot ZZ with 3 #54 bolts attached by 3 #76 nuts. It takes an engineer and a cryptographer to decipher those things.
Seriously though. Perhaps we all wouldn't be struggling so much if we were to extend a hand to ask for help.0 -
The ladies tend to be more insecure... and with insecurity comes the paranoia and the need to have those insecurities quelled. Needing to hear or read that they are pretty, they are doing well, they aren't alone. And on the flip side, when finally that girl is confident in her appearance and those insecurities vanished, other women can be judgmental that they are cocky or the like. Vicious cycle! Luckily MOST the women I've befriended on here are pretty down to earth :bigsmile:0
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I wouldn't have thought God would have to ask. :bigsmile:God or bad guys just don't ask.
I think that there are a lot of reasons people join this site - some of these things apply to a higher number of women than they do men:
1. Societal expectations regarding appearance
2. Being so overweight and unfit that it's stopping you from doing fun outdoors type stuff (men are generally stronger, even when they're in bad shape)
3. Having expensive and well loved clothes in your wardrobe that no longer fit
4. Being concerned about health
5. Trying to combat an eating disorder
6. Having a generally lower ability to "just cut back a little bit" due to having a lower overall maintenance intake.
By the last one, I mean a woman eating a set amount of food as per quantity sold, eg one chocolate bar, or one portion of fries, or one cupcake, is eating proportionally more of her daily intake than a man eating the same item. This is why I hate you men. :bigsmile:0 -
I have been on for awhile, a couple of months. Most weight loss sites and products are geared towards women. I would say all, but I am sure there are a few out there for men, but I have not found any. Most of the sites and products for men are for muscle building. You see infomercials for women which include, turbo-jam, jazzercise, Weight Watchers. Guys infomercials include, P90X all though they show women as well most of them are men, Power trainer, Perfect Pushups, although they don't come out and say it you have to follow some kind of nutrition guide which is supplied with the product. Even P90x and Insanity come with an eating guide. Of course they don't tell you that you need to follow that closely to see results and of course they don't tell you the people you see on the TV are trainers and pros. And the real life people you only see pictures of are all photo-shopped to look perfect. These products do work, but not as fast as they say they do and it takes a lot of effort.
OK sorry got off track, men in general don't get into patting each other they seem not to need the affirmation that women need to feel good about themselves. Women compare each other even when just walking down the street they might see another woman about her size and think is that what I look like or does she look better than me. Guys don't think that way, well at least I don't. I work out because I like the way I look and feel not because some one else thinks so. Women in our society seem to need to feel like they look good they are the ones who are attracting or what to keep attracting men or partners so they keep them or don't want them to stray. So they need that reassurance that they are still attractive to their mates or when trying to get a mate. Weight loss for women is harder and I think the need to see that they are not alone with issues and men just don't understand, the only ones who will listen are other women. The men in their lives don't fill that gap of having the same issues as women. So they look to each other for that support and affirmation that we as men lack in giving them.
I myself answer posts, but have never started one, I am in the same boat you are. I am guilty of that as well. I don't have any friends on here that are guys they are all women. Not because I asked them to be, but most of them are because I posted an answer to a question they had or know them from some place else.0 -
I've posted on here a few times, but mostly in response to others' questions. I've actually had a few people just friend me based on a couple of posts I made and they've been ridiculously supportive (considering they're total strangers). I mean the kind of thing where they say "Great Job!" on my posts when I'm under calories or when I have a kick *kitten* workout. I like that kind of stuff. Makes me proud of what I'm doing...0
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I don't mind asking for help, but I tend to obsess. So when I was ready to loose weight, I read books. I subscribe to 3 magazines. I research what I am taking. I try different variations of work out plans. I listen to knowledgeable people here.
Normally I don't ask because I research first...then ask.
(Yes, I intentionally used "loose" just to upset my fellow grammar nazi friends. You have no idea how dirty it felt typing that.)0 -
i believe it is both..
guys, even my DH, seem to have it easy as far what society thinks of them.. the older they get, the sexier.. not the same for women... even if they get a lil beer belly they still look good.. plus the whole "manhood" thing gets in the way of them asking for help with ANYTHING!
women, have it hard all the way around. when we go through pregnancy, our bodies become stretched in all ways, it's hard to get that back. esp, after more than 1 child. Society does play a lot on what we see as beautiful & sexy. in today's world we need to be skinny with long hair & a good tan.. centuries ago, it was the opposite.. the thicker a lady was meant she had plenty to eat & was wealthy, if she had pale skin, that also meant she didn't have to work outside..0 -
Oh and I am totally ok with the inordinate amount of ladies here.
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I haven't started any posts, because I don't have any questions....
I read. And research. And read some more. And I have been struggling with this stuff for many many years. So I have slowly figured out what works for me.
In regards to the motivation and support. I enjoy giving it to those who are struggling the same as me. I could care less if people comment on what I'm doing, not that I don't appreciate it. It's sad in one sense that we seek the encouragement from total strangers rather than those closest to us. It doesn't say much about those people in our lives. But, then it's a testament to the rest of us that are willing to support a total stranger, because we share similar goals and journeys. Bitter and sweet, I suppose.0 -
I'm similar to Binary_Jester in the sense that I am much more likely to research my question before I ask someone. No offense to anyone on here, but I like to know what the experts think. And, you can research mutliple points of view with resources supporting both and come to your own conclusion. Then I don't have to filter through, "No, THIS is much better . . . I read an obscure study five years ago that I can't remember the name of . . ."
Know what I mean?
I definitely do a lot of reading on here though. Even if I may not have thought of a particular question, I've learned a lot from these boards.0 -
Oh and I am totally ok with the inordinate amount of ladies here.
I was just thinking "And thank God for that" when I read the title of the thread. :drinker:0 -
My asian heritage wants to rike your comment.Oh and I am totally ok with the inordinate amount of ladies here.
I was just thinking "And thank God for that" when I read the title of the thread. :drinker:0 -
i post all the time and will take help for all !!!!0
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I ask questions all the time.0
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well as a guy who has asked a few questions on MFP, I usually dont get many responces. which is discouraging.
I have posted about different workouts and asked for peoples thoughts but hardly ever get any feed back. i have had maybe two or three questions actually answered when opening up a topic.
I do agree that women have a lot of pressure on them, weither that be from men, other women, or themselves. they are held to a standard that is set far too high.0 -
I don't post threads that ask questions because I search to see if it's already been asked first. The search feature is my friend. When I find what I'm looking for, I will browse through the replies to see if someone brings up a point that I should research further. If I can't find what I'm looking for, I will ask my friends whatever is on my mind or even send a pm to someone I know is well educated on the subject. I'm planning for my introduction and before/after pictures to be the only threads I ever create on mfp.0
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well as a guy who has asked a few questions on MFP, I usually dont get many responces. which is discouraging.
I have posted about different workouts and asked for peoples thoughts but hardly ever get any feed back. i have had maybe two or three questions actually answered when opening up a topic.
I do agree that women have a lot of pressure on them, weither that be from men, other women, or themselves. they are held to a standard that is set far too high.
I have noticed that when a guy posts there aren't as many responses. Perhaps that is because women don't feel comfortable giving advice to a guy? Or don't feel their knowledge applies? And as others have said, guys just aren't as chatty. Though I tend to ramble on and on when people send me questions as private messages. I get carried away.0 -
Hit me up on a message and I will do my best to answer.well as a guy who has asked a few questions on MFP, I usually dont get many responces. which is discouraging.
I have posted about different workouts and asked for peoples thoughts but hardly ever get any feed back. i have had maybe two or three questions actually answered when opening up a topic.
I do agree that women have a lot of pressure on them, weither that be from men, other women, or themselves. they are held to a standard that is set far too high.0 -
Pretty much agree with everything that's been said.
I post a fair bit on the forums but don't usually have questions, usually just links to interesting articles I have come across and recipes and stuff. Definitely spend more time answering other people's questions I would say. (as well as random jibber jabber ) 0 -
I post quite a bit and have started some threads, but those are mostly fun. As others have said, I research on my own and find the answers I'm looking for. I will say I have no problem asking for directions or reading the instruction manual, sometimes to the embarrassment of my wife :laugh: .0
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The ladies tend to be more insecure... and with insecurity comes the paranoia and the need to have those insecurities quelled. Needing to hear or read that they are pretty, they are doing well, they aren't alone. And on the flip side, when finally that girl is confident in her appearance and those insecurities vanished, other women can be judgmental that they are cocky or the like. Vicious cycle! Luckily MOST the women I've befriended on here are pretty down to earth :bigsmile:
Maybe actually the ladies are MORE secure and that is why they are ok with asking questions.
Plus guys always want to "fix" everything, so I guess it's a perfect balance. I choose to embrace the differences that God created into men and women. It's hard to understand each other sometimes but if we realize we were made to balance each other out, it all suddenly makes much more sense.0 -
As a side note, I don't think I've ever posted a question on the forum. I have posted a few interesting things or I'll join a group with a common goal. I read the posts a lot but I interact more with those who are my friends, through the newsfeed and messages.0
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I have asked a few questions, but I find if I do I don't get many responses either. If I let my mind take over I think it's b/c I am not pretty enough. I know thats not all together true b/c I reply to as many things as I can when I see it and don't discriminate. But I just don't get responses like a lot of people do so I tend to just do the research myself.
On a side note, I do think women have more pressure to lose weight, but men have more pressure to look "buff" so I think it's equal but different. My husband would like to lose his belly, but he mainly works on his arms if he works out. He wants nice muscles, thinks that makes him look more manly. I don't think so, personally, but really its not about what other people think completely. its about what we see. I know I'll never look like I want to look b/c I can't see improvements. I keep working hard and have lost weight, but when I look in the mirror I see a big fat manly looking plain woman. No amount of positive feedback seems to help with that.
We are our own worst enemies. IMO.
Sorry for the blabbering rant.0 -
We are our own worst enemies, indeed. Or our own best motivators. I prefer the latter.0
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