nothing can motivate me ..
hiraraeesi
Posts: 16 Member
i need help badly... i wanna lose ove 30 kgs but i cant even achieve 1 kg goal.. nothing can motivate me.. i hate my body but i still cant resist food.. sometimes i feel like i m not normal... if i m not comfortable with my body then y cant i stop eating..
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Replies
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Well, for me, it was what I believed. I thought I could never change.....but I did. You can too. It does take time. I hated my body and honestly I still do. Believe you can create change for yourself. It truly does help.0
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thanx for replying.. i hope u can understand what i m going through with.. bcoz of this self hatred i ve lost my confidence and motivation.. i only find releif in eating.. i even am in the edge of losing the love of my life just bcoz he thinks i am selfish and just dont care about my body and the way i look..0
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You have to believe that something can motivate you, I am convinced there is something to motivate you, the only question is what is the thing. For me; jeans. You know that we should always remember, we can do it, we will do it, nothing will stand our way, I am sure you can lose all 30 kg! Do it! Don't ever think you can not.
Do yourself a list of benefits you will earn by eating healthy and be thin.0 -
It is a struggle to get started, but trust me you don't want your motivation to become mine. I'm not even 25 years old and I weigh over 300 lbs. I was just diagnosed with high blood pressure and type 2 diabetes. That is my motivation. If I don't change my life, I won't have one to live. My advice to you is to not think about how much you weigh or what you want to lose. Instead, think about what you want to gain. You want to gain confidence. You want to gain health. You want to keep your relationship. Don't do it just for your looks. Do it for everything else. And then take it one day at a time. When you find yourself wanting or reaching for something unhealthy, stop yourself and debate what would be a better alternative. Want a glass of soda? Reach for water instead. Want a chocolate chip cookie? Get your sugar fix from a serving of fruit. Moderation and proper serving sizes is keep to keeping a healthy life. Don't plan too far in advance and try not to get down when you have a setback because it will happen. But keep in mind what you want and put the work into and you'll get there.0
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I think, looking at 30 kg from the very beginning is not a productive approach.
Break down your goal into small ones like 5 kg loss/month (realistic goals).
You are going through comfort eating. I have gone through it as well so have many others.
And trust me, if you expect someone can motivate you more than yourself then it is not true.
As adults, we have the capacity to change the course of our lives.
Check success stories in the community section.
You will be amazed to see pictures of so many people who have lost incredible amount of weight.
I love to read stories of real mums who did it for their kids and families, very inspiring!0 -
You just need to start. Once you start exercising and paying attention to your calories/nutrition you will get into a rhythm. You will slowly see results which will encourage you to continue and form new habits. Hopefully by then it will turn into a lifestyle change. The hardest part is starting though and committing to it with purpose. Good luck.0
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You have to want to change to change. if you don't, failure is imminent. bottom line0
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Motivation only takes you so far. Discipline is what enables you to push on even when you don't feel like it.0
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No one can motivate you but yourself. The only advice I can give is just to start. Start eating healthily right now, this second. I'm only a month in, my main motivation is that I've done it for 20 odd days and I'm not going to undo all my hard work. Plus I've lost 12lb. It's an amazing feeling. Try it!! Do it now. You absolutely can!!!0
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hiraraeesi wrote: »i need help badly... i wanna lose ove 30 kgs but i cant even achieve 1 kg goal.. nothing can motivate me.. i hate my body but i still cant resist food.. sometimes i feel like i m not normal... if i m not comfortable with my body then y cant i stop eating..
Its really hard to do anything when you hate your body.
Thinking the time you put in wont change anything.
Asking your self, why even bother. You could do this for weeks at a time and not see the changes you made.
So here is the deal
The 1st thing you need to do is find the body that you want.
Go to www.bodybuilding.com
2nd step. On paper, write down the steps, you need to take to get the body you want.
3rd step. On paper, write down what you typically eat. And ask your self, will this help you get the body you want?
Figure out where you can reduce the size of your portions.
4th step.-- When you eat, ask your self, will this help you get the body you want.
Find the people/classes at the local gym.
Once you can do this for 1 day.. then it will be come 2 days.
2 days will be come 3 days, etc... etc.. etc..
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http://www.amazon.com/Smart-Why-Cant-Lose-Weight/dp/1419618474
I understand where you are coming from, I feel the same way a lot. I have a long way to go, but it seems like I'm always just starting over. This book has helped me a lot.0 -
tigersangel247 wrote: »http://www.amazon.com/Smart-Why-Cant-Lose-Weight/dp/1419618474
I understand where you are coming from, I feel the same way a lot. I have a long way to go, but it seems like I'm always just starting over. This book has helped me a lot.
thanku so much..
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tigersangel247 wrote: »http://www.amazon.com/Smart-Why-Cant-Lose-Weight/dp/1419618474
I understand where you are coming from, I feel the same way a lot. I have a long way to go, but it seems like I'm always just starting over. This book has helped me a lot.
thanku so much..
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thank you so much guyz.. i wasnt expecting this much support ... i ve tried everything and every diet.. but never succeeded coz i couldnt continue for more than a week.. but this weight amd body ruining my life.. but i beleive this time i will do it for the sake of my happiness0
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Stop seeing it as dieting and denying yourself food. That's not what weight loss is about. It's about changing your relationship with food. If you eat foods that are better for you you can often eat more volume because "empty" foods like chips and sweets are loaded with calories (let's not even get into the sugar, salt, and chemicals). You'll also start to feel more motivated. Your energy levels will rise as will your general outlook on life.
The key for me, with sweets, is to not even start. Some people have a "cheat" day where they go out for beer and pizza or something like that. If I did that I'd end up eating a whole cake then I'd crave sugar all week. I'm better if I just say "No" to sweets. No cheat day. I do, however, keep high quality dark chocolate in the house. If I get that sweet tooth in the evening I grab a square of chocolate and that works for me. I got something sweet and didn't wreck my day and start myself on a down hill slide.
Good luck. Only you can change you. No matter how many people support you it's up to you in the end. Is it easy? No. Is it worth it? Yes. Will you have set backs? Without a doubt. Welcome to the club.0 -
Commander_Keen wrote: »hiraraeesi wrote: »i need help badly... i wanna lose ove 30 kgs but i cant even achieve 1 kg goal.. nothing can motivate me.. i hate my body but i still cant resist food.. sometimes i feel like i m not normal... if i m not comfortable with my body then y cant i stop eating..
Its really hard to do anything when you hate your body.
Thinking the time you put in wont change anything.
Asking your self, why even bother. You could do this for weeks at a time and not see the changes you made.
So here is the deal
The 1st thing you need to do is find the body that you want.
Go to www.bodybuilding.com
2nd step. On paper, write down the steps, you need to take to get the body you want.
3rd step. On paper, write down what you typically eat. And ask your self, will this help you get the body you want?
Figure out where you can reduce the size of your portions.
4th step.-- When you eat, ask your self, will this help you get the body you want.
Find the people/classes at the local gym.
Once you can do this for 1 day.. then it will be come 2 days.
2 days will be come 3 days, etc... etc.. etc..
That advice is far to practical and will only help to achieve the desired results. Nobody wants to hear that kind of planned, rational thinking on this forum.
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It's very hard to motivate yourself to lose a big amount of weight.
Here's the deal.
Tell yourself that you will lose 1kg in one week.
Just 1kg. Just one week.
People (family especially) may not be on your side - deal with it. It's your body not theirs.
Tell your friends that you are not going out this weekend. (If you have to go, drink so you don't drink or just tell them you don't want to drink.)
Do your grocery shopping in the morning, or shortly after a meal. Don't allow yourself to have crap in the house - the Pope isn't going to call in for a visit.
Write down (or record on this app) everything, and I mean everything, even the good stuff.
Drink eight glasses of water/day but mix it up. Just have one when you get up, another shortly after breakfast.
Take all the candy/cakes/biscuits/white bread and throw it in the bin. (Or give it to a homeless charity.)
It's very hard. Everybody here has been throw what you're going throw and we feel your pain.
YOU CAN DO IT but only when you stop reading people who write "You can do it" and start being the person who writes "I am doing it." There's no magic formula. You know it's in your control.0 -
@hiraraeesi I also struggle with motivation. When everything just seems too hard to care. I've been trying to lose weight on here for 18 months. I started out strong and lost 35lbs. Then I lost motivation and have been trying to get it back for nearly a year. My problem is the opposite end of the spectrum. I'm totally ok with how I look. Seriously, I'm cute as hell even though I'm 40lbs over weight. Yes, and humble too. lol.
But, I'm scared of dying young and leaving my small children. (OK. let's be honest. I'm scared of dying in general). So, I want to get healthy to live as long as possible and with good quality of life. Yes, I'm only 37, but from what I hear weight loss only gets harder.
I think motivation has to come from happiness, not fear and that is probably why I'm failing. I'm much healthier than I was when I started this. I can run 5 miles even being overweight. But, if I was 40lbs less maybe I could run a marathon? Maybe I would have more energy? I've tried fat. It's not that bad. But what if I'm missing out because thin is soooo much better?
Just keep trying. If you want this to work forever, you have to change for life. That is a long time. Focus on one day. Don't beat yourself up if you have a day where you overeat. Seriously? Are you going to be able to avoid overeating every day for the rest of your life? Nope. Not realistic. I think we win when the good days outnumber the bad.0 -
As others have said, only you can motivate you and, really, motivation only takes you so far. The reality is, motivation comes and goes. You can't rely on it to carry you through any long term "project", weight loss included. The secret to success is a combination of determination, dedication, habits and commitment.
When you make the decision to make the necessary changes and are truly committed to it, it will happen but you have to want it first. The sad truth is, until you really want it, it's just not going to happen. Ask almost anyone who has been in your position and they'll tell you it's almost like a light switch being flipped; you're suddenly just ready and willing to do what is needed to make it happen.
The good news is, MFP makes it easy. You don't need to change what you're eating, you just need to eat less. You don't have to go hungry, you don't have to eat rabbit food and dry chicken breast or buy expensive organic food, you simply need to let MFP figure out your calorie goal, log absolutely everything you eat and make sure you're staying close to that goal every day. If you can do that, you can lose weight.
Whatever decision you make, I wish you the very best.0 -
Just wait til he thinks your selfish bc you want to workout!lol for reals will happen.hiraraeesi wrote: »thanx for replying.. i hope u can understand what i m going through with.. bcoz of this self hatred i ve lost my confidence and motivation.. i only find releif in eating.. i even am in the edge of losing the love of my life just bcoz he thinks i am selfish and just dont care about my body and the way i look..
look here I know where you are. I have been there. But the only way to get that confidence back is put down the (whatever your fave food to munch out on) and go walk! Like now! So you don't probably hace energy for a full workout so walking is perfect. Make a 5 min goal do something for just 5 min a day then bump it up as you go. You will get more energy, you will accomplish things you never thought and then comes the confidence and wait what? Omg my shirt looks like pajamas bc I lost so much weight! Yes I am frickin serious! This can and will be you if you want it! I know no amount of cookies or ice cream can ever make me feel that good, I like myself so much more for my food choices are healthier than ever:)
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I can relate. Last year, I was over 400 lbs, but really got sick of myself to the point that it made me want to do something about it. I'm with the ones that say to list realistic goals (example: just cut sugar and sweets out). Looking at 30kgs seems like a lifetime, but I tell you that I'm 303lbs now, in just a year. That's over 100 lbs!
You can do this. If you have the want for it, it might take you some time before you find the motivation that'll help you stick with it (took me years), but it's achievable. Just realize this one thing: whatever diet plan, exercise plan, eating schedule or whatever you choose to do; isn't important. You have to realize that you're changing your life. If you constantly think of it as a plan that you have to stick to, it will be something that you can ultimately quit at some point.
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I've been fighting trying to "regain my motivation" for a long time now. I'm starting to think that maybe "motivation" isn't the best word for it. I've heard people talk about doing the work and "walking on faith" until the belief catches up with you.
I started on this path in 2011. By the start of 2013, I'd lost about 115 pounds. I had my "act to-ge-ther!" I had surgery to remove some of the "overhanging belly", and had a rough time recovering, went to Disney, then the excuses started coming out of the woodwork, my dad passed away, and I've been trying to get my motivation back ever since. Here it is now 2 years later, and I'm sitting at 60 pounds lost.
Maybe it's just having enough discipline to get things moving in the right direction and the motivation comes later.
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hiraraeesi wrote: »i need help badly... i wanna lose ove 30 kgs but i cant even achieve 1 kg goal.. nothing can motivate me.. i hate my body but i still cant resist food.. sometimes i feel like i m not normal... if i m not comfortable with my body then y cant i stop eating..
Have you considered seeing a counselor to talk to about some of the issues you are having?0 -
hiraraeesi wrote: »i need help badly... i wanna lose ove 30 kgs but i cant even achieve 1 kg goal.. nothing can motivate me.. i hate my body but i still cant resist food.. sometimes i feel like i m not normal... if i m not comfortable with my body then y cant i stop eating..
If you want "Real Motivation" Buy your self a $1000.00 dress that 5 sizes to small.
Now.. get on the path to be able to wear it, before it's too late0 -
hiraraeesi wrote: »i need help badly... i wanna lose ove 30 kgs but i cant even achieve 1 kg goal.. nothing can motivate me.. i hate my body but i still cant resist food..
Most of us who gain a bunch of weight dislike what we see and feel like. You are not alone in your feelings there.
Within you is the power to do something about it. So what's stopping you?
I can tell you what stopped me: Buying my own bull$hit excuses. I told myself every fairy tale known - that it would be "hard" or "take too long" (too long for what?) or "that I'd fail".
Complete BS.
Here's the reality: if you adopt a healthy diet featuring a caloric deficit (fewer calories than your body uses every day) and supplement your efforts with some exercise to improve your fitness and health (not to lose weight, to be healthy and improve self-image too)... you will be much lighter but even more importantly feeling much better mere months from now.
You can do a lot in a year. I lost 34kg in about 10 months.- Was it too hard? Nope. It was easy. Truly.
- Is losing most of the weight I gained in 13 years over a mere 10 months too long? Nope!
- Did I worry constantly about failing? Nope. Within about four weeks I noticed my clothes were already fitting looser and my fitness was improving. I knew I would keep going because results matter.
Suggestion: Don't look at the motivation threads for support, look instead at the SUCCESS STORIES forum section.
In there are thousands of threads and posts from people just like you who made a commitment to themselves to improve their health and committed to themselves to keep going. You'll find photos of amazing transformations and stories that will bring tears to your eyes. If you read enough of these stories you'll soon realize that many of the stories about their weight issues before they started will sound just like you. They just decided to start changing.
You can do it too. We all can do this.
You can do a lot in a year.
I hope you do because I want to read your exuberant posts during your transformation and read your success story at the end.
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hiraraeesi wrote: »i need help badly... i wanna lose ove 30 kgs but i cant even achieve 1 kg goal.. nothing can motivate me.. i hate my body but i still cant resist food..
Most of us who gain a bunch of weight dislike what we see and feel like. You are not alone in your feelings there.
Within you is the power to do something about it. So what's stopping you?
I can tell you what stopped me: Buying my own bull$hit excuses. I told myself every fairy tale known - that it would be "hard" or "take too long" (too long for what?) or "that I'd fail".
Complete BS.
Here's the reality: if you adopt a healthy diet featuring a caloric deficit (fewer calories than your body uses every day) and supplement your efforts with some exercise to improve your fitness and health (not to lose weight, to be healthy and improve self-image too)... you will be much lighter but even more importantly feeling much better mere months from now.
You can do a lot in a year. I lost 34kg in about 10 months.- Was it too hard? Nope. It was easy. Truly.
- Is losing most of the weight I gained in 13 years over a mere 10 months too long? Nope!
- Did I worry constantly about failing? Nope. Within about four weeks I noticed my clothes were already fitting looser and my fitness was improving. I knew I would keep going because results matter.
Suggestion: Don't look at the motivation threads for support, look instead at the SUCCESS STORIES forum section.
In there are thousands of threads and posts from people just like you who made a commitment to themselves to improve their health and committed to themselves to keep going. You'll find photos of amazing transformations and stories that will bring tears to your eyes. If you read enough of these stories you'll soon realize that many of the stories about their weight issues before they started will sound just like you. They just decided to start changing.
You can do it too. We all can do this.
You can do a lot in a year.
I hope you do because I want to read your exuberant posts during your transformation and read your success story at the end.
Great Post! Thank you...0 -
In my opinion a great motivator is motivating friends. Let's be friends!
I don't know much about your story, but my comfort eating had a lot to do with my relationship with my family and some people around me. They make comments or judge, which made me eat and hurt my confidence--just proving them right and the cycle continued.
It seems to me like the problem might not be food, it might be what's around you. The question to ask: am I happy? If the answer is no, that's the problem.
Take it from me, losing weight won't solve feeling negative about yourself and your life. However, stepping out and treating whatever is hurting your soul, finding what makes you HAPPY (and it's not food, because you feel worse after) will motivate you.
When you help heal your mindset, fitness and healthy eating will follow. I promise. I like to travel and try new foods--just focus on moderating and experience the beauty in the world. Some of my MFP friends like to hike or cook. Whatever it takes the real goal is to find HAPPINESS. The motivation will organically follow and you'll enjoy the process.
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You can always start small. Eat what you want, but give yourself a calorie limit. Make yourself accountable for how many calories you ate today. Keep that momentum going for a week. Then try cutting back a little more the next week. Go for a walk by yourself every day and clear your head. Think about why you want to make a change. Think about all the ways you can help motivate yourself. Hatred is so destructive and defeats us before we start. Ask yourself, is it really yourself you hate, or just your situation? Hope this helps. 0
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thanks to all.. i m really feeling better after reading all above posts and a bit motivatedn its just may be that no one motivated and ever understood what i really wanted.. i always wanted support which i never had..
if i 'd asked my family plz not to bring fatty foods they were always like .." its not our fault that u r fat.."
my friends always complimented that" ya u lookin good today if u were skinnnier u wd 've looked more beautiful"
and today i was so motivated to join a local gym.. when i informed my brother he was like.. " ya ya.. i ve been watchin u struggling to weight lose from my childhood u still the same"
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@hiraraeesi You have to make your own conditions of success. Your family might not care (deep down they do) or more likely may simply be insensitive or may not know how to support you.
Shake that off.
You can do this on your own, really you can. You are an adult and can make your own choices. If the family brings in fatty foods (nothing wrong with healthy fats!) that don't work for *your* plan, bring in something tasty that works for you.
Maybe in watching how you conduct yourself over time, they'll make some changes too. Maybe not. But you can still do this on your own, support from family or not.0
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