A Whole Lot of Haters!

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  • maggie4097
    maggie4097 Posts: 156
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    I agree that many posts get way too nasty on here. I don't know the specific situation to which you refer, but eating disorders are real and dangerous, so I'm not sure that ignoring what you think is unhealthy behavior is really a good idea either. But it should be done in the spirit of being helpful, not as an attack.

    good point!


    Just wanted to say that your before and after pics are awesome! Way to go, girl!
  • fidgekitty
    fidgekitty Posts: 43
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    Wow, I guess I'm shocked by that, I've never seen anyone outright attack someone one here (but I'm new so I haven't really gotten to know a lot of people yet lol) I'm curious now as to the thread you're referencing, what has is about? What could the person have said to start such an inflammatory response? I can't see why people feel the need to gang up on someone because they don't agree with their opinion, some people can be just outright mean :( Fortunately my own experience on here has been nothing but positive
  • maggie4097
    maggie4097 Posts: 156
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    I agree that many posts get way too nasty on here. I don't know the specific situation to which you refer, but eating disorders are real and dangerous, so I'm not sure that ignoring what you think is unhealthy behavior is really a good idea either. But it should be done in the spirit of being helpful, not as an attack.

    good point!




    Just wanted to say that your before and after pics are awesome! Way to go, girl!

    I didnt' copy that right, but this was for Alicia!
  • ItsTerriC
    ItsTerriC Posts: 436 Member
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    I'm in. I've been logging here for a few months and it seems that lately there is an increase in nastiness. Maybe I just didn't read the boards often enough when I first started. I love that we can post almost anything without too much censorship. Just because someone posts their opinion about something doesn't mean that they want to be attacked for it. If I read a post that I don't agree with, I will normally just move on. I have found myself defending the OP just because the attacks are so personal and nasty. I love MFP and all of my super supportive friends, but the meanness has almost made me want to stay away lately.
  • Sweetlvr
    Sweetlvr Posts: 10 Member
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    My momma was raised southern, and believe me she drilled that into us about not saying anything unless it was something good, and never hurt anyone's feelings! I'm onboard with you.
  • SeaChele77
    SeaChele77 Posts: 1,103 Member
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    I'm with you to a point. As a recoverying bulimic - I have to say its nice so many people were concerned for her. Yes, some were not nice comments and I agree we should remain positive. However, if someone is entering the danger zone of going too far with their weight loss - I think people should not ignore it and say "well its her life her body". As someone who struggled (and stuggle daily) with self image - what *you* see is not what *I* see!! The girl you are referring to, is indeed too thin. She said she spoke with a doctor, which is great - but she is very much on the very thin line of danger!

    If there are concerns I'd rather people tell me than to turn a blind eye!!
  • BigBoneSista
    BigBoneSista Posts: 2,389 Member
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    My conscience won't let me ignore behavior that I believe may really hurt someone, but there's no good reason to be ugly about trying to help.

    This.
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
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    I would just like to say I am tired of multiple posts telling me what I should say or do. People need to learn to be adults. People need to learn that a person expressing their opinion is just that. Everything should be taken with a gran of salt. People need to learn that expressing a view contrary to theirs is not a personal attack.

    People need to put their big boy/girl pants on.
  • fitaliciag
    fitaliciag Posts: 373
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    I agree that many posts get way too nasty on here. I don't know the specific situation to which you refer, but eating disorders are real and dangerous, so I'm not sure that ignoring what you think is unhealthy behavior is really a good idea either. But it should be done in the spirit of being helpful, not as an attack.

    good point!

    Just wanted to say that your before and after pics are awesome! Way to go, girl!

    thanks!
  • BigBoneSista
    BigBoneSista Posts: 2,389 Member
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    My conscience won't let me ignore behavior that I believe may really hurt someone, but there's no good reason to be ugly about trying to help.

    This.
  • deeharley
    deeharley Posts: 1,208 Member
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    I think I know which thread you're talking about and if they got nasty it was after I read it. I saw a lot of concern for what looked unhealthy. And she seemed like she expected that - like she knew the photos COULD cause that reaction. She didn't seem to take it as hurtful and the responses to her responses were more positive.
  • fitaliciag
    fitaliciag Posts: 373
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    I would just like to say I am tired of multiple posts telling me what I should say or do. People need to learn to be adults. People need to learn that a person expressing their opinion is just that. Everything should be taken with a gran of salt. People need to learn that expressing a view contrary to theirs is not a personal attack.

    People need to put their big boy/girl pants on.

    like.
  • SarahofTwins
    SarahofTwins Posts: 1,169 Member
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    People need to put their big boy/girl pants on.


    I sold those big girl pants! :laugh::tongue:
  • AngieM76
    AngieM76 Posts: 622 Member
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    I am with you! I read the post you are referring too and because of my opinion, I chose not to say anything at all. I felt bad that she was happy with her results and then people were not so nice.
  • Losingitin2011
    Losingitin2011 Posts: 572 Member
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    I'm with you.

    There was a thread earlier that the OP deleted their account because of people being jerkoffs. I really wanted to post one last time on there calling them out as pathetic immature jerks, but that is a "personal attack" and would get me in trouble. Good to see that the people doing it never get in trouble for it. So sick of it.
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
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    People need to put their big boy/girl pants on.


    I sold those big girl pants! :laugh::tongue:
    +1...first post of the day to make me LOL
  • binary_jester
    binary_jester Posts: 3,311 Member
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    I'm with you.

    There was a thread earlier that the OP deleted their account because of people being jerkoffs. I really wanted to post one last time on there calling them out as pathetic immature jerks, but that is a "personal attack" and would get me in trouble. Good to see that the people doing it never get in trouble for it. So sick of it.
    You call it being jerkoff's. I call it making a point. Different POV's so it is nearly impossible to make everyone happy.
  • Thriceshy
    Thriceshy Posts: 707 Member
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    I read the thread, and while some of the responses were quite blunt (and maybe not as kindly phrased as they could have been), I didn't see anything I would call "hatefu" or "mean." I, too, was taken aback at how thin the OP was, and would have said something, had others not, though I might have taken it to messaging. As someone who starved herself down to below 100 lbs as a teenager, I definitely feel concern when I see someone who has lost enough weight that bones protrude. I think that wanting to keep things supportive and kind is a fine goal, but I also think that expressing concern over someone's excessive weight loss is also a good thing. Perhaps the phrasing wasn't so good, but I think the intentions were good.
  • l3ugjuice
    l3ugjuice Posts: 233
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    People need to hear opinions, sure...but this site (particularly the forums) are really set up to form a support system. As a general rule I'm all for brutal honesty on 'social' media (forums, etc)...but not in every circumstance. I can be downright nasty when discussing partisan political politics, for example, but I'm really not going to do that here as I just dont feel it's the proper venue for it. Everything in it's proper time and place & all that.

    I have no idea what the OP is referring to, honestly. I dont recall reading a post where anyone was being downright rude and nasty (other than in one of the marathon Atkins GOOD! Atkins BAD! threads that spring up every day or so). Just saying in more of a general sense than a specific one. I'd rather be helpful and supportive here than, well...mean.
  • Losingitin2011
    Losingitin2011 Posts: 572 Member
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    I'm with you.

    There was a thread earlier that the OP deleted their account because of people being jerkoffs. I really wanted to post one last time on there calling them out as pathetic immature jerks, but that is a "personal attack" and would get me in trouble. Good to see that the people doing it never get in trouble for it. So sick of it.
    You call it being jerkoff's. I call it making a point. Different POV's so it is nearly impossible to make everyone happy.

    Mocking, insulting, and being nasty is making a point? I think there is a big difference between making an opinionated statement and just being nasty for the sake of being nasty.

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