Men: Dating a woman with kid/s

Options
Lovely0770
Lovely0770 Posts: 876 Member
in Chit-Chat
If you're dating a woman with a kid, does this and should this really matter? I am all about if you accept the woman, you accept her kid or kids and if you don't accept her kid or kids, then you really don't accept the woman. I thought that was just a given, however, doesn't seem to be the case.

Men, what are your thoughts?

and women feel free to share your thoughts as well.
«13

Replies

  • Lovely0770
    Lovely0770 Posts: 876 Member
    Options
    Sugar_Pill wrote: »
    In for responses...

    Right? I am waiting and no one seems to have an opinion on this. Given the current statistics I find that highly unlikely lol
  • ClubSilencio
    ClubSilencio Posts: 2,983 Member
    Options
    I'd date a woman with a kid, maybe 2. But if she doesn't get along with the father of her children I am not in for the ride. Needs to be love coming from all sides. :)
  • Bonny132
    Bonny132 Posts: 3,617 Member
    Options
    I am dating a single dad who gets on with the parent of one of his two children. His daughter does not get on with her mum either. I know why, and I know both have tried but sometimes relationships breaks down and cannot be repaired.
  • BringerOfGainz
    BringerOfGainz Posts: 51 Member
    Options
    It doesn't matter for me but I also have a greater awareness of her flaws. Taking on her kids is a huge commitment so she better be rock solid, especially emotionally.

    Men don't like drama at all.
  • DrFever100
    DrFever100 Posts: 5,899 Member
    Options
    I've raised two boys.... I wouldn't be put off if she had kids. It would just mean we have more in common.
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
    Options
    ClubSilencio wrote: »
    I'd date a woman with a kid, maybe 2. But if she doesn't get along with the father of her children I am not in for the ride. Needs to be love coming from all sides. :)

    Interesting. My ex simply has nothing to do with our children since he married again and has new children. Hard to get along with someone who refuses to reply or talk to his kids.
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
    edited December 2015
    Options
    If a man does or doesn't have kids, that's irrelevant. If he has kids, how much a part of their life he is says a lot. I have two kids from a previous marriage. I don't want some guy to step in and be their father figure or try to act like their dad. I want him to develop a friendship with them. I have been handling it all on my own for 5 years and I'm fine doing it for 50 more.
  • LJT253
    LJT253 Posts: 676 Member
    Options
    I hope wen wud
  • LJT253
    LJT253 Posts: 676 Member
    Options
    Men lol
  • Spinner_
    Spinner_ Posts: 244 Member
    Options
    If he doesn't accept your kids. He doesn't deserve you
  • BigDougie1211
    BigDougie1211 Posts: 3,530 Member
    Options
    Personally, I don't really think it should be an issue.
    But I can also understand why it might put someone off.
    In the early " can't keep your hands off each other " phase people might want to be spontaneous and parents ( rightly ) have to be much more responsible and level headed.
    I also think sometimes people think if they're dating someone with kids then there's an immediate seriousness expected of them, which doesn't suit some people. ( even though they may be wide off the mark in terms of what the other party actually wants )
    Like I say, children wouldn't be something that would put me off at all.
    But just because someone might be, doesn't necessarily make them bad.
  • LJT253
    LJT253 Posts: 676 Member
    Options
    Good for u
  • katievo92
    katievo92 Posts: 31 Member
    Options
    What about women getting with men with kids? Now I have kids and I have enough kids I really wouldn't want anymore as I wouldn't want them to have less in life and have to share with more siblings. . Sooooo I really wouldn't want to take on a man with kids for this reason :/
    It's not always men taking on women with kids?
    But saying that I'd want some one to take me and my kids on so am I just being a *kitten* now or what :0
  • BigDougie1211
    BigDougie1211 Posts: 3,530 Member
    Options
    katievo92 wrote: »
    What about women getting with men with kids? Now I have kids and I have enough kids I really wouldn't want anymore as I wouldn't want them to have less in life and have to share with more siblings. . Sooooo I really wouldn't want to take on a man with kids for this reason :/
    It's not always men taking on women with kids?
    But saying that I'd want some one to take me and my kids on so am I just being a *kitten* now or what :0

    Yeah, you are. Hang your head in shame and think about what you've done! :)
  • JessicaJS23
    JessicaJS23 Posts: 1,863 Member
    Options
    I have a 12 year old and 10 year old that I've been raising by myself for 6 years. My husband simply checked out one day and has not been in the picture since. When I began to date again I was not interested in having a relationship with someone else who had children. My son is special needs and I couldn't picture myself taking on more kids and also there was the worry of dealing with another child's mother. Well to try and keep it short I ended up falling for a friend who had also recently become a single dad of 3. Dating him and having his kids in our lives was one of the most fufilling things that I have experienced. I did not know I could love kids that weren't biologically mine the way I loved them and still love them. The mothers got a little bitchy sometimes but I just minded my business.. Kept cool and eventually we came to respect other. My point is never say never and give things a chance : ) you never know what your capable of feeling until you try it.
  • Rawlings124
    Rawlings124 Posts: 278 Member
    Options
    A small bit of men's perspective. Went thru a divorce not of my own choosing but am sure I contributed to it. At the end of the day no matter how you score it a failure. My ex made my life miserable scheduling every event imaginable for the kids on my weekends so that I was constantly running around as I lived about an hour away. Long story short she got remarried to a man with kids. She became much more considerate and I credit her new husband for giving her perspective of what it can be like that she did not have before. They are grown now and on their own - we both had made a pact never to say a cross word about each other to the kids - something that was very challenging to honor but now grateful we did.
  • ValerieMartini2Olives
    ValerieMartini2Olives Posts: 3,024 Member
    Options
    Since having my kid, I have dated men with and without kids. I prefer to date men with kids since they are more understanding to my situation.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    Options
    When I met my wife, she was coming to me for Massage because of an Auto Injury. She was a single Mom with two little girls. Many times she would have to bring her little girls with her because there was no one to watch them. They would wait in the reception area. Normally, I would bring her in the massage room and then wait out in the reception area while she changed. I would listen to the little girls talk and play.
    It was about 18 months before we went out for the first time. Took me a while to work up my nerve. That was 27 years ago. Those two girls are 34 and 32 now. Jan and I had a girl together. She is now 22. I always treated the girls the same. There were no step-kids and kids. There were three daughters. I went out of my way to make friends with the 2 girls' father. We do birthdays and Thanksgivings together with the girls' Dad and stepmom.

    It wasn't always easy, but both of the older girls have told me, on separate occasions, how great the family blended and how happy they were about it.

    25th Anniversary coming up next year. I couldn't be happier. If I had walked a way because children were involved I wouldn't be this happy.

  • JessicaJS23
    JessicaJS23 Posts: 1,863 Member
    Options
    TheRoadDog wrote: »
    When I met my wife, she was coming to me for Massage because of an Auto Injury. She was a single Mom with two little girls. Many times she would have to bring her little girls with her because there was no one to watch them. They would wait in the reception area. Normally, I would bring her in the massage room and then wait out in the reception area while she changed. I would listen to the little girls talk and play.
    It was about 18 months before we went out for the first time. Took me a while to work up my nerve. That was 27 years ago. Those two girls are 34 and 32 now. Jan and I had a girl together. She is now 22. I always treated the girls the same. There were no step-kids and kids. There were three daughters. I went out of my way to make friends with the 2 girls' father. We do birthdays and Thanksgivings together with the girls' Dad and stepmom.

    It wasn't always easy, but both of the older girls have told me, on separate occasions, how great the family blended and how happy they were about it.

    25th Anniversary coming up next year. I couldn't be happier. If I had walked a way because children were involved I wouldn't be this happy.


    That is so awesome

Categories