Men: Dating a woman with kid/s

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  • ryry_
    ryry_ Posts: 4,966 Member
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    I think it depends on the mindsight of the guy. If he is not sure he wants to have kids or if he is sure he doesn't want to have kids right now, he is likely not a match for a single mom (I'll throw in the caveat that maybe he has such a strong connection with you and the kids it changes his mind but I have no experience in this arena and only see that on romantic comedies). But if the guy is in a place where he wants kids or has kids himself then I don't think it would be an issue.

  • JessicaJS23
    JessicaJS23 Posts: 1,863 Member
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    ryry62685 wrote: »
    I think it depends on the mindsight of the guy. If he is not sure he wants to have kids or if he is sure he doesn't want to have kids right now, he is likely not a match for a single mom (I'll throw in the caveat that maybe he has such a strong connection with you and the kids it changes his mind but I have no experience in this arena and only see that on romantic comedies). But if the guy is in a place where he wants kids or has kids himself then I don't think it would be an issue.

    Im dating a guy that does not want to have his own kids but is happy to have mine as a part of his life. So it can happen ... My brother is the same way. Doesn't want to be a bio father but would be willing to adopt or take care of children that aren't his. It's all about love and I'm sure lots of men's minds change when they are in the situation.
  • KD454
    KD454 Posts: 1,548 Member
    edited December 2015
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    JessicaJS23 wrote: »
    ryry62685 wrote: »
    I think it depends on the mindsight of the guy. If he is not sure he wants to have kids or if he is sure he doesn't want to have kids right now, he is likely not a match for a single mom (I'll throw in the caveat that maybe he has such a strong connection with you and the kids it changes his mind but I have no experience in this arena and only see that on romantic comedies). But if the guy is in a place where he wants kids or has kids himself then I don't think it would be an issue.

    Im dating a guy that does not want to have his own kids but is happy to have mine as a part of his life. So it can happen ... My brother is the same way. Doesn't want to be a bio father but would be willing to adopt or take care of children that aren't his. It's all about love and I'm sure lots of men's minds change when they are in the situation.

    First off in this day and age there is almost zero chance of meeting someone who doesn't have a kid/kids. And if you do find one of the few that do not have any then you have to wonder why they don't. (unless they are 20) Dating a woman with a kid/ kids is a man's game and not for boys. There's an easy way to separate the two for you single moms.

    Secondly, you're dating? Wtf..... lol haha (inside joke)
  • robs_ready
    robs_ready Posts: 1,488 Member
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    If you want someone enough you'll look past potential barriers
  • JessicaJS23
    JessicaJS23 Posts: 1,863 Member
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    KD454 wrote: »
    JessicaJS23 wrote: »
    ryry62685 wrote: »
    I think it depends on the mindsight of the guy. If he is not sure he wants to have kids or if he is sure he doesn't want to have kids right now, he is likely not a match for a single mom (I'll throw in the caveat that maybe he has such a strong connection with you and the kids it changes his mind but I have no experience in this arena and only see that on romantic comedies). But if the guy is in a place where he wants kids or has kids himself then I don't think it would be an issue.

    Im dating a guy that does not want to have his own kids but is happy to have mine as a part of his life. So it can happen ... My brother is the same way. Doesn't want to be a bio father but would be willing to adopt or take care of children that aren't his. It's all about love and I'm sure lots of men's minds change when they are in the situation.

    First off in this day and age there is almost zero chance of meeting someone who doesn't have a kid/kids. And if you do find one of the few that do not have any then you have to wonder why they don't. (unless they are 20) Dating a woman with a kid/ kids is a man's game and not for boys. There's an easy way to separate the two for you single moms.

    Secondly, you're dating? Wtf..... lol haha (inside joke)

    I never expected you to be in here. Yes I go on dates with a real life person but don't worry he's totally not into me. I should really go to Tracy about this.
  • Peter_Brady
    Peter_Brady Posts: 3,750 Member
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    Excellent post @MuscleAndMascara

    To OP and anyone else in this situation.

    I am sure that being a single parent can be lonely, and certainly it is a must that future partners be accepting of your children. That being said, in my opinion, you should date a person for quite awhile before considering introducing them to your child. Even if your and his/her intentions are pure, your child is going to have to adjust if it does not last. Put your child through that enough times, and it can cause behavioral and emotional issues with your child. I have witnessed it from a sibling's dating habits.

    If I were in this situation, I would get a babysitter and not bring my dates home until it materialized into something more serious.
  • brandid34
    brandid34 Posts: 154 Member
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    I've just resolved that it isn't going to happen. He'd have to be pretty amazing to be willing to accept me and my kiddos. So I'm just doing my thing. It's lonely sometimes and I would love to have a meaningful relationship, I actually think I'm a catch ;) but I think it's easier for women to accept men with children than men to accept women with them.
  • Dez11B
    Dez11B Posts: 1,542 Member
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    I've dated women with kids. I have no problem with it at all.
  • Derp_Diggler
    Derp_Diggler Posts: 1,456 Member
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    Why not? Bonus: once the kid's old enough to drive they can chauffeur us around while we make out in the back seat
  • pierportbeach
    pierportbeach Posts: 647 Member
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    I married a woman with two kids. It hasn't always been easy. But I don't see it as a prohibition at all
  • LAMCDylan
    LAMCDylan Posts: 1,214 Member
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    If a woman has 2-3 kids I usually won't ever bother with her. She'd have to be really, really amazing for me to consider. Having no kids is preferred but I MAY accept her if she has a single kid AND the father of that kid is cool. Meaning, there is no *kitten* and games and there are boundaries in place. Nothing worse than some insecure *kitten* who wants his GF back and tries to do whatever he can even using the kid as leverage to control his ex-GF and ruin her life and chance at new relationships. If I recognize this I am gone right away.
  • moya_bleh
    moya_bleh Posts: 1,375 Member
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    I'm perfectly happy to date somebody with children.

    What I'm not happy to do, however, is date somebody who merely sees me as a billpayer/schoolrun taxi service of convenience simply to fit in where the last ex left off (children or no children.) I've been subject to many a rude and intrusive financal audit on various dating sites, the motives were obvious.
  • chamzlila
    chamzlila Posts: 189 Member
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    If you get close enough to me to even meet my son you are extremely lucky. Its not about a man accepting my child, its about me accepting a man to be in his life. And know you will always come second to him. True men will expect this

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