How I feel about weighing 235 lbs at 32 years old

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I can't believe I have gained all this weight. It seemed to happen so fast. One day I looked down and wondered "when did my butt get this big?" literally. I get winded walking up short flights of stairs. My clothes don't fit, and I am embarrassed leaving the house. I can't believe that scale has a 2 in the front instead of a 1.

I'm 32 and 235 lbs (3 lbs down already..yay!), and I am disgusted with myself. I used to be beautiful, definitely a 9, but now I see myself as a 4. And it kills me because I know I have the power to change my weight. I've just let myself go. I luckily have a loving boyfriend (of 11years) who always makes me feel beautiful. I feel bad he has to be with me now, since I had been so pretty before.

I have to lose this weight..but the healthy way. I've been logging on here for 17 days straight, working out 30min on my stationary bike everyday. So I hope I'll see some results. But weight loss is a painfully slow process. To think it could to take years to get to my goal of 155.

I can do this. I have to. Just one good choice after another. Baby steps.
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Replies

  • KareninCanada
    KareninCanada Posts: 795 Member
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    You'll get there the same way you got here - one day, one hour, one minute, one choice, one bite at a time. :) Good on you for taking the first step.
  • Soloflyergirl2
    Soloflyergirl2 Posts: 127 Member
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    Eat protein in the morning.... like even peanut butter on wheat toast .. and a banana... you will feel full. Have cut vegetables in a container ready for " snacks." Don't buy chips, doritos, cupcakes, or popcorn.. all my favorites. Try to eliminate sugar out of the diet, not completely... but watch sugar packets in coffee... put a halt on candy for a while.
    This should get you to mid day. Have a salad with vegetables, maybe some skinless chicken breast, and put the dressing on the side... if it's creamy...and just dip the lettuce in it. There are a number of habits to create and to break.
    Add fruit to your day....
    You can do this. You have a lot of life ahead of you.
    By evening...... plan your dinner.... don't gorge. Don't binge.. Don't wait until you are starving because you might over eat.
    Get your guy to support you by taking a walk with you ... ten minutes... twenty minutes.. at a nice clip if you can.... not run... I said walk... every night at a certain time... or in the early morning... It sounds like he is with you through thick and thin... so maybe he will enjoy the time with you to walk and talk.
    Look online at calories for various foods that are your temptations.... and allow yourself some of it... but in moderation. Don't eat the whole pizza... I've done it... .so I'm not innocent.
    You can do this.
    You are beautiful on the inside and out..... you can do this.
    All the best.
  • whatdietnext
    whatdietnext Posts: 34 Member
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    You can do it! And don't beat yourself up for where you are. You can't change yesterday but you can make healthier choices tomorrow - and as I type that, trust that I'm always trying to remind myself of the same thing!
  • jenifferlopez718
    jenifferlopez718 Posts: 25 Member
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    I know how it feels the frustration and the anger... it is hard on our selfsteem. .. this is my 2nd time here and although I gained the weight back not all of it I learned that I was able to do it and if I did it once I sure as h $#@ going to do it again. Feel free to add me. We need all the support available
  • Annr
    Annr Posts: 2,765 Member
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    Congrats on being here! Its the best place really. First I have some things to say to you.
    You are still beautiful, (your boyfriend sees that) and don't ever think he has just settled being with you. After 11 yrs, hey its not just about the phsyical anymore. My husband and I have been married for 31 yrs, and he has always said that I was beautiful, I just never believed it, my heart never quite heard it. We are our worst critics you know.
    So how do you start feeling like your old awesome self? Well for me I started to not just settle for the crappy way I was treating myself. We are worth taking extra time and shop for healthy food instead of grabbing the quickest thing from the frozen or deli isle. We are worth taking the time to prepare food that will fuel us instead of stuff that just sits in our stomach. I love visuals so I have copied down sayings that speak to me and motivate me. I then go thru them a couple of times a week. I need to reprogram my way of thinking. I need for my body to truly lose this weight for good.

    Great sayings to put on your frig or chalkboard:

    LOSING WEIGHT ISN'T THE KEY TO HAPPINESS, HAPPINESS IS THE KEY TO LOSING WEIGHT.

    WHEN YOU FIGURE OUT WHATS EATING YOU, YOU WON'T EAT SO MUCH.

    THE MOST IMPORTANT INGREDIENT IN FOOD PREPARATION IS MY MOOD.

    Keep it simple:
    -You bite it, you write it....so log on here every day. I figure out my dinner mid-day and copy it out for my kitchen.
    -move every day. Walk, swim, whatever just MOVE. Make a mental appointment with yourself and keep it.
    -drink 8 glasses of water a day at least.

    add me if you wish to. You can vent, yell, scream at me, I'm a tough cookie. My food journal is open so you can see what I eat.



  • mariebmcd
    mariebmcd Posts: 16 Member
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    I weigh 235 too, and I can't believe I got to this point. For me, it's mostly baby weight that won't come off (but I hate that I gained 50 lbs during pregnancy). My clothes don't fit. But I know I can do it- so can you! Feel free to add me, because it looks like we have the same journey.
  • ksellers500
    ksellers500 Posts: 12 Member
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    Im also 209lbs gained after been unwell also looking for support feel free to add me
  • hammergirl0801
    hammergirl0801 Posts: 11 Member
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    Your story is so much like mine and we started a few days apart from each other. I could feel your emotions when reading your post and know what it is like to be in such a dark place. But you took a great first step and I feel truly blessed to have found MFP. Take it one day at a time and don't beat yourself up to much. It WILL take time, but you WILL get there!

    Feel free to add me!

  • GsKiki
    GsKiki Posts: 392 Member
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    When you have such a strong will power you will definetely be able to do it! Step by step the weight will go back down. Good luck :)
  • eussoob
    eussoob Posts: 6 Member
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    I've been up and down in my weight so many times in my life, I can understand where you are coming from. I'm tired all the time and I don't have any energy. I've started on this 21 day reboot and it's helping me a lot to focus on healthy food only. I'm making all my own food and eating nothing processed. It's called a detox and I see why. no sugar, no processed anything. I'm feeling better. One week in and I'm down 7.7 pounds. I think the most important thing for me is to break my bad habits. Chips, cheese, processed foods, and Takeout... I love to eat out, but I think that gets you in this position. http://www.wholeliving.com/216880/2013-whole-living-action-plan#212867

    You can do this. A lot of shame comes with gaining weight, and feeling like you have lost control. Focus on whole foods. The less processed your diet is the more full you will feel and the healthier you will be. Good luck... :smile:
  • WendyLaubach
    WendyLaubach Posts: 518 Member
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    I know what you mean about the flabbergasting appalling sense that the weight just suddenly appeared out of nowhere. At least, in more recent years I was aware of it slowly creeping up, but there was a period some years ago when I can remember being in the low 140s and then suddenly I was in the 190s. For the life of me I can't reconstruct the process between those two points! Is it possible I simply avoiding thinking about it all that time and didn't get on a scale? I just kept buying bigger clothes. Then for a long time I simply couldn't put it together that I could do anything effective about it. Finally, I came here a few months ago, calculated a daily calorie goal, started logging all my food and keeping under the calorie goal, and voila! The weight comes off steadily, easy peasy. It never was that complicated, after all. I don't eat it unless I log it first, and I don't log it if it would put me over my goal. No surprises, no drama.
  • deniseteas
    deniseteas Posts: 42 Member
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    you can do it...I was 265 and im now 173 and still losing...much slower now but it is still changing and I love every minute of it...its an amazing journey!
  • GBrady43068
    GBrady43068 Posts: 1,256 Member
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    The good thing about being 32 is if you take care of your skin (lotsa moisturizer as you go) you may be able to avoid the dreaded "loose skin" issue. Read the Success stories for information about how to do it...what works and what doesn't. Good luck..
  • JillPoverud
    JillPoverud Posts: 27 Member
    edited January 2016
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    When I started (again) on MFP on Jan 1 this year I was 235 and I'm 34. About 6 years ago (before kids) I was 145. I had worked on healthy eating and lots of exercise to get to that point and it will take time to get back to a healthy weight.

    Because the next few months will go by whether you work out or not. Make them count. This quote has helped me a lot lately. And also, the next few months will go by whether you eat healthy or not. Choice by choice.



    Good luck!
  • areallycoolstory
    areallycoolstory Posts: 1,680 Member
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    I'm 32 and 235 lbs (3 lbs down already..yay!), and I am disgusted with myself.

    :) Stop being disgusted. Be patient and love yourself as you work to reach your goals.

    I used to be beautiful
    :) I am certain you are still beautiful.

    I feel bad he has to be with me now.
    :) Stop saying this. Just focus on the awesome job you are doing to be healthier and fitter now.

    I have to lose this weight..but the healthy way. I've been logging on here for 17 days straight, working out 30min on my stationary bike everyday.
    :) Way to go:-) You got this :)

  • FabianRodriguez94
    FabianRodriguez94 Posts: 221 Member
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    I started at 230 on February 19th 2014. I'm at 145 today and still losing. You got this!
  • javabean161
    javabean161 Posts: 10 Member
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    I was at 235 Lbs in Jan 2015 but I've lost 65 Lbs since then by using a Low Carb (high protein and fat -- healthy fats) and exercising regularly. By exercise I started walking just a couple miles EVERY day and kept increasing the pace, duration so that today I jog/walk 7-10 miles almost every day. Follow this kind of program and you will lose the weight too.
  • cleverlycutemuffin
    cleverlycutemuffin Posts: 3 Member
    edited January 2016
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    You are not alone. I'm a few years older, and many pounds heavier, but a similar thing happened to me. It's been a rough 6 years for me. Now, I'll spare you those details, but I'm an emotional eater, and between those 5 years, I ate my way from 330 pounds to 414. I started logging in December, when I had to park farther away at work one day and couldn't make it to my office because I felt too fat to breathe. It was scary. It was eye-opening...so I started logging what I was eating, and I started changing my habits in this new year: cutting out breads so far, grains to follow, and I'm walking...not too much right now, but I'm getting there. We can do this. But I only meant to comment to say, that beauty is not in your size. Your boyfriend loves you for WHO you are. And when you get the extra weight off, you'll know that he loves you regardless of how you look. Hang in there!! Baby steps, one at a time!!
  • skinnyinnotime
    skinnyinnotime Posts: 4,141 Member
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    You can do it...great mind set.

    Keep at it!
  • ErinR82
    ErinR82 Posts: 50 Member
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    It sounds like you have awesome motivation! :) You can do it!