We Broke Up Because....... part 2 .....
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He's a pu$$y0
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would blare disco first thing in the morning to wake me up0
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Wouldn't go to Funky Town0
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told me I was too freaky0
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Her friends were all freaks0
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she did not like my friends... really freaky.0
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No, no, I wanted to watch Bobby Carnavale. He didn't like Boardwalk Empire0
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Was always about the tv0
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painted cartoons on the tv0
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graffiti'd the house to piss the neighbors off0
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thought stick figures were artistic0
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She wanted me to be a stick. I liked a little meat on my bones.0
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took all the steaks out of the freezer and duct taped to herself0
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Encouraged weird meet fetishes0
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Wanted me to dress like Lady Gaga0
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Wanted me to cover her in hot bacon fat..0
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Strangely, dogs were always following her and sniffing around her. Must have been the bacon.0
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served me bacon even though she knew I was vegetarian0
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wouldn't eat anything unless it had bacon on it0
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Preferred fake bacon bits to the real thing0
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had to tell her it was fake bacon when really it was chocolate0
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killed my pet pot belly pig out of desperation for bacon0
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Made fun of my pot belly one too many times0
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thought it was cute to draw pictures on her pot belly and make them dance0
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Was only interested in pot0
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tried to tell him Canada wants it legal0
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put LSD in my kool-aid0
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Put roofies into my drink and seduced me. She really wanted to have my kid!0
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Never knew when to stop kidding around0
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Turns out "my kid" was a reference to my baby goat - she curried it.0
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