Bummed by friend's comment

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2

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  • navvs15
    navvs15 Posts: 165
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    :huh: Sniff....sniff.... I'm smelling a jealous :grumble: friend...

    Hollycat
    :flowerforyou:


    I second that!
  • CommittohealthCHANGED
    CommittohealthCHANGED Posts: 436 Member
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    Be proud of your accompplishment and flaunt your stuff. I had friend tell me I look like a dried up crack head and I should stop losing weight. Congrats on your weight loss.
  • Roseapples
    Roseapples Posts: 11
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    This person does not sound like a very good friend.
    You should be proud of your weight loss!
    When you have accomplished something like that you should show off a little. I love when I am feeling good and I jave a confident group of friends around me. Good for you!:happy:
  • heather0416
    heather0416 Posts: 118 Member
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    sounds jealous!

    go for it, you've worked hard, if you can't enjoy the fruits of your labour (by feeling confident and sexy) then whats the point?

    I agree. She is probably jealous.. maybe she doesnt want you to get more positive attention than her?! You should feel good about yourself.. be proud of all you have accomplished and dont let anyone bring you down or make you feel bad .. youve worked hard to get where you are at.. smile and enjoy!!!
  • maryruth
    maryruth Posts: 1
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    Thats not concieted at all. You should be able to say that to a friend and be just fine. She should have just said "good for you!" or "I be you will look great!" Congrats on your weight loss!
  • barefootbeautiful
    barefootbeautiful Posts: 144
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    Go flaunt it! You earned the right to show yourself off, and it sounds like you're owning that work, which is a BIG step. Confidence can often be intimidating, and maybe that's what happened to your friend. She's probably watched you go from wall-flower to full-bloomed, and that can be hard for a friend (especially if she's been struggling herself?). As hard as it is to hear that from friends, you can't let that hold you back! There is nothing wrong with being confident and self-assured. Maybe she'll pick up some tips from you. And knock 'em dead at that wedding!
  • skinnyinnotime
    skinnyinnotime Posts: 4,141 Member
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    OMG, she calls herself a friend, pah, i think not. Don't let her nasty comment get you down, you've worked hard to get where you are, be proud and enjoy...definately not conceited!
  • shonasteele
    shonasteele Posts: 473
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    I agree that you deserve some attention & to feel good after all your hard work. And I agree that she *might* also be jealous. But I have one other thought too...

    I know I'm kind of obsessed about food and exercise and how well I'm doing lately. It's all I talk about to my husband and I'm sure he must get SO sick of it (but he's so supportive!) so I'm wondering if you might be doing some of that with your friend? My BFF lives far away so I haven't even told her I've lost weight (I want her to be surprised when I see her this summer) but I suspect that I'd likely be the same with her if she were here with me every day. So, I guess the question is, do you talk a lot about your weight loss and food choices with your friend? And if so, might she be tired of hearing about it all the time and feel like all the attention is on you because of your success?

    Please don't get me wrong, I TOTALLY GET the need to talk about it & 'toot your own horn' to stay on track, but is there a chance that she might feel like she (and your friendship) is taking a backseat to your weight loss?

    And CONGRATS!!! on your success - you should totally strut your stuff at that wedding and love every minute of it!!!!! We were supposed to be going to a family wedding next weekend but can't make it now cuz hubby has to work and I'm SO bummed cuz I'm getting my braces off on Monday (after 18 months of agony) and between that and losing 17 pounds, I was planning on strutting around like a peacock but now I can't :O( It's just not the same getting gussied up and strutting around the mall. So you have fun for me too, ok?
  • FaithandFitness
    FaithandFitness Posts: 653 Member
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    Well, if it does make you conceited then perhaps you and I should be charter members of The Conceited Club! I would love for someone I haven't seen in a while comment that they noticed my hard work, and that it didn't look like I was a mom of 4 (whatever a mom of 4 or 5 SHOULD look like, I don't know)
  • i_love_vinegar
    i_love_vinegar Posts: 2,092 Member
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    :huh: Sniff....sniff.... I'm smelling a jealous :grumble: friend...

    Hollycat
    :flowerforyou:


    I second that!

    Third that! Sounds like she is jealous of your success. Don't let her get to you, maybe gently tell her that you are sorry if you sounded like you were being conceited, but you are just extremely happy with your weight loss. Then let her know that she hurt your feelings. :smile:
  • dawnw30
    dawnw30 Posts: 270
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    Thanbk you everyone! You have all made me feel better and not so bad about what she said. I don't talk about it alot wiht her and she hasn't had success with her weight loss efforts through the years so I guess it may be as you all say - she may be a bit jealous! Thank you for confirming I wasn't being a bad person, lol! :flowerforyou:
  • Noctuary
    Noctuary Posts: 255
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    I know everyone says she might be jealous. That's the go to answer we all go to when we don't want to think of things a little deeper. She could be. Of course. Or maybe she think you think the wedding is all about you. And not...the bride.
  • katie_on_a_mission
    katie_on_a_mission Posts: 112
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    Wow, what your friend said was so rude and wrong!! You weren't being conceited and the fact that she said you were makes me think she's jealous.
  • garysgirl719
    garysgirl719 Posts: 235 Member
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    Sorry, I know this is the unpopular opinion, but I think I would have reacted just like your friend did. I love hearing compliments from my friends right now on my success, but that it is because it is coming from them. It's not something I expect or even something I see in the same way they do. I think perhaps to your friend by saying what you did, you came across as bragging on your looks.
  • dawnw30
    dawnw30 Posts: 270
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    I know everyone says she might be jealous. That's the go to answer we all go to when we don't want to think of things a little deeper. She could be. Of course. Or maybe she think you think the wedding is all about you. And not...the bride.

    Well, anyone who knows me knows that is so not true...she knew better...it was just kinda on the mean side how she said that to me...had to be there I guess :wink:
  • dawnw30
    dawnw30 Posts: 270
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    Sorry, I know this is the unpopular opinion, but I think I would have reacted just like your friend did. I love hearing compliments from my friends right now on my success, but that it is because it is coming from them. It's not something I expect or even something I see in the same way they do. I think perhaps to your friend by saying what you did, you came across as bragging on your looks.

    Not bragging at all...and "looks" didn't really enter into it - just a healthy body immage. I gained so much weight with 9 pregnancies and 5 kids that I still looked pregnant. Would just be nice to be seen as "normal" again and not huge. :bigsmile: Over the years the thing has always been..."Oh, so you have 5 kids"...like that explains everything...you let yourself go sorta thing...was just thinking it would be nice to hear the opposite for once :wink:
  • dawnw30
    dawnw30 Posts: 270
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    Well, if it does make you conceited then perhaps you and I should be charter members of The Conceited Club! I would love for someone I haven't seen in a while comment that they noticed my hard work, and that it didn't look like I was a mom of 4 (whatever a mom of 4 or 5 SHOULD look like, I don't know)

    I don't know how a mom of alot of kids should look...but an awful lot of people use it for an excuse to let themselves go - me included! :embarassed: Just would like to not have to use any excuses for me looking bad anymore!! It would feel awesome to not have to hear the "Oh, well that explains it!" like I am a bad person or something...
  • lajuice24
    lajuice24 Posts: 409 Member
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    I think your friends comment was over the top. You ahe done a great job and should feel good about it! I have to disagree with the poster who said you were bragging. Five kids and nine pregancies will pack on the weight! Feel good about what you have done!
  • tmacs
    tmacs Posts: 60
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    sounds jealous!

    go for it, you've worked hard, if you can't enjoy the fruits of your labour (by feeling confident and sexy) then whats the point?

    EXACTLY! I know this is bad, but I'm wondering if she's overweight?
  • TS65
    TS65 Posts: 1,024 Member
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    Really? Why would you call this person a friend? It's obvious she's not. Ignore her comments as they aren't supportive in any way shape or form. Then, re-evaluate what defines a friend for you (stick with those that support you! Everyone else is an acquaintance not worth fretting over. JMO.)

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