Just a perspective shift, someone here wishes they were as fat as you are!

aprilkorn wrote: »

I have 40 lbs to lose and right now I am really not happy with my body. My mother has about 140 to lose and she just rolls her eyes at me because I'm trying lose weight. She said she would kill to only need to lose 40lbs and tries to make me feel bad about not being happy with my body. I am overweight but it's almost like my struggle is trivial to her. Does anyone else who has large amount to lose feel this way about those who have less? I mean I would rather start trying to loose 40 now than wait until I have 140 to lose before doing anything. And I agree with above you have a great attitude.

I think my only advice for handling situations like that is this: Think about the way that you're talking about your weight around her. Are you talking about the extra weight you have like it's disgusting or it makes you ugly or things like that? Because if so, think about how she must feel about herself with 3.5x as much to lose. She might feel like you think SHE looks gross, even if that's not true!

With that said, it's unfair for your struggle to be minimized. It's hard to lose 140lbs, but it's also hard to lose 40lbs. It requires the exact same effort, lifestyle changes, attitude changes, everything! It's not easy! Separate yourself from that negativity emotionally. How she feels about herself, and even how she feels about how YOU feel about yourself, has nothing to do with you.... it only has to do with her own feelings about her own situation. Take care of yourself FOR YOURSELF, not in spite of anyone else. Celebrate your success and maybe seeing you be positive, working hard, and seeing results will inspire her to take on the same attitude and see changes in her life. If it does, great! If it doesn't, that's not your fault/problem/concern.

makingmark wrote: »

You put it very well. I have thought the same thing as I am losing weight. There was a time when I was at the weight I am now that I was so ashamed of that weight. Now I am happy to be that weight again and feel good about.
I was ashamed when I was 60 pounds less than I am now, 100 pounds less, even 150 pounds less. I will not be ashamed the next time I hit those weights. I will be ecstatic and I will be comfortable in my own skin this time. It is so hard rebuilding self esteem and it is an ongoing process to fight my own negative thoughts.

I know exactly what you're feeling. I had to make the decision to be comfortable in my skin though. It is as easy to hate yourself on the way back down... when if I first started losing weight again, and started realizing that my body would never fully recover from what I had done to it, I was pretty hateful toward myself. My inner thighs are probably going to have loose skin, and probably my lower belly and under arms too. I know I can minimize these things with weight lifting (which I do), but they will still be there. For JUST A MINUTE, I thought, "OMG WHAT IS THE POINT IF I'M STILL GOING TO HATE MY BODY!???" and like I said before, I needed that perspective shift and all of those things matter so much less to me now than feeling great, being strong, and reaching goals.

4evrazen wrote: »

It helps me to read your posts and remind myself that I am not alone in this and that I am worth the effort this is going to take. My children are more than worth every lb I can lose to be a better mother. They are worth every bite of ice cream and nachos I don't eat and every sip of Mt. Dew I don't drink. I want to have the energy to run and play with them before they are too old to want to. I want to have family pictures that I am actually in. I want to be the mother that my kids deserve and can be proud of.

I totally cried reading your posts this morning. Yes, that was the driving factor for my starting all this. You should message me and I can show you some of things that I've found that have really helped me get where I needed to be emotionally to face all the emotions you go through with weight loss. I feels awful to turn away compliments because you honestly do not believe them. I have felt that and I know. I feel so connected to your story, I really hope that you stay with this course and find yourself. I'm going to send you a friend request. If you need someone, I want to be your cheerleader.

RandiNoelle wrote: »

Well put! I'm a size 14-16 down from a size 24 (and over 50 lbs down from when I started last November). My family is all overweight and look at me now thinking I'm where I need to be in terms of weight loss, but I still feel I have a ways to go. They scoff when I weigh all of the food I eat at home and look up the nutritional values while out to eat. This is for me, not for them. I'm comfortable. I'm getting healthy and fit, and I feel really good about that.

You should feel really good about that. It takes so much discipline to be consistent with that. I fail at that all the time. Usually when people are negative about positive things you're doing, it has everything to do with them judging themselves when reminded by your success that they are not doing what they should be. If they were comfortable with themselves, it wouldn't matter to them what size you were or what you ate. Keep going girl!

terrileighfit13 wrote: »

I started out at 5'6 230 and now I'm 174 size 8. I feel like I did when I was 230. Dieting is a struggle. I'm feeling like I can't get back on track. ):

So you can see that the problem isn't your body, it's what you THINK of your body. You should message me and I will send you some ideas and things I did to change my perception of myself. You are beautiful and you're doing great, but the only person that really matters for, is YOU!