We broke up because...
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Frightened to easily0
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Wouldn't let me have my toys
..he was a nice guy too 0 -
Enjoyed her toys more than me...0
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Got a sex change and is now a dude0
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3.5" ..nuff said
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don't go sharing how far my tongue sticks out of my mouth! That's private!
She couldn't keep secrets1 -
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dumped her for sticking me in tighty whiteys0
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for trying to stop me from seeing Metallica in august1
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shouldn't be hard to do with the tongue-ACK! What am I doing?! That was supposed to be a secret!0
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Still not letting me out of the closet!0
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He came out of the closet!! (yikes...)0
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She drank the last ounce of bourbon.0
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He never bought top-shelf. Thought I was only good enough for well drinks.0
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She was never supportive of my super villain ambitions...0
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He tried to kill Thor1
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She was afraid of thunder0
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Always had to have the last word0
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Her mother sleep-walked into our bed0
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Caught him with my mother 0
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she wasn't as flexible as her mom
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Never let me call her Mami!0
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she slipped me a Viagra mickey
they had to draw the blood out with a needle 
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..we are never breaking up...in fact he is cuffed to my bed right now 
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