Barre...disappointment...trying...turning 40...ha
joyzoso
Posts: 66 Member
I have been going through some positive changes... one being a huge career change that I have been working my butt off (of course the hustle continues to move up, but...). I have been so wanting to get back to what I was 6 years ago and now, at almost 40 and the biggest I have ever been, trying out new things, feeling completely unmotivated or useless (even though I jogged 3 X this week).
So I tried a Barre class last weekend. I think I was the only one who had an actual day job and no make up on... oh and of course not a twig in lulelemon (sp?) gear. While I can see how great that class would be, I am all about efficiency, having time for my outside projects (and jobs), and not having to spend 20 dollars per class and feeling completely out of place.
Since moving in with my boyfriend, I don't love too close to my old gym anymore and know that has been an excuse (though it takes me not even 10 mins from my new job to get there). I feel like I just need to bite the bullet and jog, take the extra time to cross the river and go to my old gym where I can comfortably lift weights to complement my jogging and maybe even catch some classes that I used to love. I wanted to like Barre, but just don't fit in... and don't believe in targeting muscle groups so one can look hot in 6" heels and bootie shorts.
Do you ever go through this, knowing what is right, trying to be as efficient as possible, getting completely down despite other aspects of your life going really well? Is this all because I am turning 40 in 2 months? Gah!
Jogging and lifting weights. To me this is the ultimate combo for fat burning when it comes to efficiency. I just want to drop grasping for new things and get my *kitten* back in the game. Focus factor and such.
Thanks for letting me ramble...
So I tried a Barre class last weekend. I think I was the only one who had an actual day job and no make up on... oh and of course not a twig in lulelemon (sp?) gear. While I can see how great that class would be, I am all about efficiency, having time for my outside projects (and jobs), and not having to spend 20 dollars per class and feeling completely out of place.
Since moving in with my boyfriend, I don't love too close to my old gym anymore and know that has been an excuse (though it takes me not even 10 mins from my new job to get there). I feel like I just need to bite the bullet and jog, take the extra time to cross the river and go to my old gym where I can comfortably lift weights to complement my jogging and maybe even catch some classes that I used to love. I wanted to like Barre, but just don't fit in... and don't believe in targeting muscle groups so one can look hot in 6" heels and bootie shorts.
Do you ever go through this, knowing what is right, trying to be as efficient as possible, getting completely down despite other aspects of your life going really well? Is this all because I am turning 40 in 2 months? Gah!
Jogging and lifting weights. To me this is the ultimate combo for fat burning when it comes to efficiency. I just want to drop grasping for new things and get my *kitten* back in the game. Focus factor and such.
Thanks for letting me ramble...
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Replies
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I'm 46, and yeah, finding fitness classes at our gym that aren't full of shallow 20-somethings complaining about how they might get wrinkles if they lose weight just strips any fun there is out of it.
Honestly, though, you don't need to go to the gym. Go to Walmart fitness section and pick up some dumbbells and a set of the rubber fitness bands. (I get the Golds Gym bars and then I can just add more weights as I improve). You'll spend about the same as a $20 class. Check out some of the Pilates DVDs (Walmart has a decent selection) or watch some free Pilates workouts on Youtube!) You don't need to go to the gym to lift, don't need to go to the gym to work out, and you can bring the classes right into your living room with videos.
(And you can wear what you want and not have to worry about what anyone else thinks. Except the cat. The cat can be very judgmental, especially about footwear.) 
If you're one of those people who really enjoys classes, instead of checking the gym, check with your local community centers and YMCA- A lot of time the classes are cheaper and the people involved are of wider backgrounds and age-groups. The hip hop class at our community center has 60 and 70 year olds in there with the teen-agers, just hippin and hoppin and having a blast.
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It is always good to have a ramble.
I think you know what to do. Ditch the barre and go back to the gym and lift, jog. If that is what you like to do, do it.
The gym is still close enough to get to 3 days a week.
Congrats on the new job and moving in with your fella.
Cheers, h.3 -
ElizabethOakes2 wrote: »I'm 46, and yeah, finding fitness classes at our gym that aren't full of shallow 20-somethings complaining about how they might get wrinkles if they lose weight just strips any fun there is out of it.
Honestly, though, you don't need to go to the gym. Go to Walmart fitness section and pick up some dumbbells and a set of the rubber fitness bands. (I get the Golds Gym bars and then I can just add more weights as I improve). You'll spend about the same as a $20 class. Check out some of the Pilates DVDs (Walmart has a decent selection) or watch some free Pilates workouts on Youtube!) You don't need to go to the gym to lift, don't need to go to the gym to work out, and you can bring the classes right into your living room with videos. (And you can wear what you want and not have to worry about what anyone else thinks. Except the cat. The cat can be very judgmental, especially about footwear.)
If you're one of those people who really enjoys classes, instead of checking the gym, check with your local community centers and YMCA- A lot of time the classes are cheaper and the people involved are of wider backgrounds and age-groups. The hip hop class at our community center has 60 and 70 year olds in there with the teen-agers, just hippin and hoppin and having a blast.
My cat is very judgmental!middlehaitch wrote: »It is always good to have a ramble.
I think you know what to do. Ditch the barre and go back to the gym and lift, jog. If that is what you like to do, do it.
The gym is still close enough to get to 3 days a week.
Congrats on the new job and moving in with your fella.
Cheers, h.
Indeed. Pick up an espresso after work and get to it.
Thank you!
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I felt that way about a Les Mills class I attended - not the class contents itself, but the participants and instructor weren't particularly welcoming to me. My Barre class, on the other hand, couldn't have been more accepting, and more perfect for me. The teacher (an ex-dancer, also highly qualified plates instructor) works everyone really hard, but understands good form, and what individuals can do at their particular fitness level. I also don't pay anywhere near $20! More like £7.50! Don't feel obligated to stick with any exercise routine that you don't enjoy - there's so much choice these days, that I just couldn't bear doing something I didn't enjoy.
Part of the reason people are successful at long-term exercise plans is that they find things they love, and keep doing them until it becomes such a habit that it's completely second nature to them. Exercise, in my opinion, shouldn't feel like a punishment just to walk into a class/gym - although feeling like hard work is OK!!!3 -
If the issue is not liking the gym or the classes there or convenience, what worked for me (and did in the past) is finding a gym I liked right by my office. I know myself enough to know this makes a huge difference as to whether I go regularly, and therefore it's worth it to me to just make something so much easier.
As an added benefit, the gyms by the workplace I've joined are ones where everyone else also seems to be fitting in a workout around work (including in the classes, even the barre class) ;-), and of course has some obvious timing patterns that you can avoid if you have a flexible schedule.
You shouldn't feel you need a gym, of course, there are loads of exercises you can do without it (in the summer I mostly bike and run outdoors).1 -
Can you find a gym closer to your new place? I can't imagine having to spend $20 per class either!0
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You know you can find Barre classes on YouTube and online subscriptions! I'm not doing this now but it's on my list to try in the future!! 0
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It's okay to try new things and decide you didn't like it. That just means you tried and know a little better what you like and don't like. I think more people should spread their wings, step out of their comfort zone and try new things.2
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Do you ever go through this, knowing what is right, trying to be as efficient as possible, getting completely down despite other aspects of your life going really well? Is this all because I am turning 40 in 2 months? Gah!
Jogging and lifting weights. To me this is the ultimate combo for fat burning when it comes to efficiency. I just want to drop grasping for new things and get my *kitten* back in the game. Focus factor and such.
Thanks for letting me ramble...
Do what works for you. Jog and lift weights if that is your thing.
I have not been to a gym or a class. It isn't an option where I live. I prefer to exercise solo. There are tons of free workout videos on you tube for free and I use those to try different things.
I kind of really like being on the other side of 40. It feels very freeing to me compared to my 20's or 30's. I know who I am and care so much less about what other people think or do.
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It's great that you tried something new, too bad it didn't work out. I've always wanted to be one of those pilates/barre/yoga/boutique fitness class people, I forced myself for years to incorporate the classes into my workout routine, but i never looked forward to them and always felt out of place. I like to work out hard, get sweaty and ugly, don't want to have to "dress up", put on makeup or do my hair. I also have limited time to workout and it always made me so disappointed when that one hour of me time i had was wasted on something that didn't make me feel great afterwards. So i finally conceded to the fact that going to these outside studios was not for me and cancelled my memberships. i am happiest working out at home in my own gym and environment, and it is very convenient, i don't have to waste any time getting to a gym and can fit working out in between other things i need to get done in the house.
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I have done Jazzercise and yoga, and nope, nobody is in there all made up and looking cute, they just come to work out. It may depend on your city though. I really like going to an organized fitness class with a teacher, it helps a lot.
Dancing for an hour leaves me feeling really great, better than any other kind of workout. I think it satisfies something in my soul, not just body. Ballet, bellydancing, even silly Jazzercise, all of them work better for me than running or lifting.
But as all the dancey fitness classes are out in the suburbs but yoga studio is 1 mile away from me, and there is a good assortment of plates and 2 bars in the garage, courtesy of the fiance, what I do at this time in my life is jogging, yoga, and some lifting.0 -
Totally depends on the gym.0
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I just wanted to pop in here and say I'm on the verge of turning 49 and my 40's have been my BEST DECADE EVER!
Welcome to the club! 1 -
Lift and jog! You're speaking my language.
41 years old, and feeling and looking as good, if not better, than I did in my 20's. I'm loving my 40's so far!1 -
Jogging and lifting weights. To me this is the ultimate combo for fat burning when it comes to efficiency. I just want to drop grasping for new things and get my *kitten* back in the game.
It's fun to try new things once in a while, but I'm also a big fan of getting to the point and doing what I know works well for me. Since it sounds like you already know what works for you, get out there and do it! You got this!
P.S. Jogging and weights works for me, too.
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geministyle67 wrote: »...my 40's have been my BEST DECADE EVER!
Welcome to the club!
Agreed! It's been amazing so far...
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geministyle67 wrote: »...my 40's have been my BEST DECADE EVER!
Welcome to the club!
Agreed! It's been amazing so far...
Loving the 40's too!
If you know that jogging and lifting weights are your thing, then go for it. You don't need a gym if there is not one close to you. Get some weights for home and start pounding the pavement. You can do it! 0 -
Turning 40 was a hard transition for me; hang tough it will lighten up!
The real always kicks whoopass on the ideal, so start small and do what you can. Think of it as a large knitting pattern and add a stitch when what you are already doing feels easier. A slightly frayed month of overall consistency will get you further than isolated days of ambitious perfection followed by nothing.1 -
ElizabethOakes2 wrote: »Honestly, though, you don't need to go to the gym. Go to Walmart fitness section and pick up some dumbbells and a set of the rubber fitness bands. (I get the Golds Gym bars and then I can just add more weights as I improve). You'll spend about the same as a $20 class. Check out some of the Pilates DVDs (Walmart has a decent selection) or watch some free Pilates workouts on Youtube!) You don't need to go to the gym to lift, don't need to go to the gym to work out, and you can bring the classes right into your living room with videos. (And you can wear what you want and not have to worry about what anyone else thinks. Except the cat. The cat can be very judgmental, especially about footwear.)
I'm 64, and I need to go to the gym to get the results I'm looking for. I don't need the distractions from my husband. I don't need the distractions from the phone, the pile of laundry that needs to be done, or the garden that I think needs my immediate attention. I don't need to go to WalMart, either. I don't patronize stores that exploit their employees to the point that they need to go on public assistance to feed their families.
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I was the chubbiest person in my yoga classes that I attended for 3 months. I don't care I used to be really anxious and imagine what other people thought of me, or assumed about me, but that's all it is-- assumption and imagination. The reality is I'm a person that wants to be fit and take yoga (and barre so I can relate to this, but I can't afford the barre in my area so I am doing an at home system). If someone happens to look at my body and judge me that's their issue that they are caught up in. It has nothing to do with me. 0
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Absolutely put a priority on doing what is fun for you - that makes it so much easier to stick to it.
That said, if I decide to do something like a class or club, I try really hard to make myself stick with it for a few sessions. Sometimes as I get to know people better, and they get to know me, it turns out the situation is more socially comfortable than it was when I was brand new to it. (I'm a no-fancy-gym-wear, no-makeup kind of workout gal, too - and even more oddball, I've had bilateral mastectomies with no reconstruction and never wear prostheses to work out, so I am really, really not much like the appearance-focused young women.)
In fitness classes, I also have found it kind of fun in the past to be the old (I'm 60), fat woman who can out-work the svelte kids. (That doesn't happen immediately, of course. ;-) It also isn't quite as much fun now that I'm the old, thin woman - people don't underestimate me as much as they used to.) It's also utterly hilarious to me to hear the 20- and 30-somethings say things like "I'm starting spin class now, because I won't be able to do things like that when I'm older." Heh.
But for you, it sounds like jogging/weights is really what works for you. So, do that. I'll bet you can find a way to make it work enough times a week to thrive.0 -
celadontea wrote: »I was the chubbiest person in my yoga classes that I attended for 3 months. I don't care I used to be really anxious and imagine what other people thought of me, or assumed about me, but that's all it is-- assumption and imagination. The reality is I'm a person that wants to be fit and take yoga (and barre so I can relate to this, but I can't afford the barre in my area so I am doing an at home system). If someone happens to look at my body and judge me that's their issue that they are caught up in. It has nothing to do with me.
Yep. Nobody cares. If they do, they are just happy for you that you are working out. Also there are some heavier ladies in my yoga classes who are amazing, can do really cool stuff, strong and flexible.
In Jazzercise it was so much fun to watch the ladies shrink. They would start out fatter and get leaner. I was in a M-F 5:30 AM class.
In my experience anything works, IF you do it often enough, consistently, and with your full effort and attention.0 -
just because the class didn't fit for you doesn't mean you should rag on the people attending.
find a different class or do what already works for you.3 -
I loved my 40s. It was an awesome decade. Turning 50 hit me really hard, and now I'm worried about wrinkles, health, etc. (I'm 52 now).0
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I am exactly the same way at the ripe old age of 43. I like to keep it simple. I can see my friend doing her Bootcamp class from my squat rack in the morning and she will NEVER talk me into doing that nonsense! They're always fiddling around with steps and balls and dumbells. Too complicated for me. I tell her there's only two workouts I like: Run Really Far And Run Back or Lift Heavy Things And Put Them Down. She just laughs at how bored she be with my workouts. Good thing there's something out there for everyone!0
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I had eight years of ballet when I was a kid and am intrigued by Barre and have been meaning to get to a class, but I'm not a fan of group exercise classes anyway and last I checked there wasn't one during off work hours. Plus it's gardening season. Went for my first hike today in a long time - that garden is very demanding.0
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I'm also 40 and am often the largest (frame size more than fat) and oldest person in such classes. I don't feel uncomfortable at all. I used to be a professional dancer though, so my body can do unexpected things. I am a lot fitter than I look.
Anyhow, while I agree that you should find things that you like to do...you are the one responsible for your own feeling of emotional comfort. If you don't care, it's likely that nobody else will either.
If Barre doesn't work for you, don't give up on dance. Zumba, hip-hop or social dance might be a useful part of your fitness plan.
I don't buy from unethical companies...and for me, both Walmart and Lululemon fall into that category. There is nothing wrong with looking nice to exercise--slap on some mascara, put on a nice outfit (Target C9? Athleta? Title9) and go do whatever you want.0 -
Find what works for you. Don't disparage others for choosing something that works for them.1
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