Stuck up *kitten*.

Options
idreamskinny85
idreamskinny85 Posts: 38 Member
in Chit-Chat
I don't know if I am just a stuck up *kitten* or I expect a lot in a relationship. Ok so my male coworkers brags about their wives making more than them. Significantly more! One is gloating about being a stay at home dad and chilling at home. Note that I work with these guys and I constantly have to clean up after them. Picking up their trash, correcting mistakes. They literally play videos games all day long at work. What exactly would they do at home other than sleep on the couch?? I just look at their wives as settling because they do all the cooking, cleaning, child care, and make more than their husbands. I am just like " what is the point of being with these guys, they make your life harder because he has nothing to offer". I just think the responsibilities should be equal or close to equal. I don't see how working full time being the breadwinner and then coming home and doing ALL of the housework would make any woman want to get married. Seems one sided. I also don't like the reverse, a lazy housewife with a hard working husband. If you are going to "stay at home" you need to be working, not just chilling. That's just my opinion. I actually prefer for me and my spouse to both work and contribute equally to the relationship. Thoughts?? (lol I know I am going to regret this)
«13

Replies

  • idreamskinny85
    idreamskinny85 Posts: 38 Member
    Options
    They are leaving work to become "stay at home " dads. lol
    should have clarified that
  • synchkat
    synchkat Posts: 37,369 Member
    Options
    I'm unclear how they can be stay at home dads while working

    and as a stay at home mom lots of people think I just sit at home doing nothing all day long. You aren't stuck up you are just ill informed and judgmental. You might clean up after these guys at work but you don't know what they do at home. I stay home because often my husband's pay cheque is more than I'd make a year. We'd rather I raise our child than a nanny.
  • MsAmandaNJ
    MsAmandaNJ Posts: 1,248 Member
    Options
    Sounds like they have their lives made! I like when things are fair. Some women like to take care of others or are so independent hubbies like that just slide right in.
  • idreamskinny85
    idreamskinny85 Posts: 38 Member
    Options
    ok see that's fine!!! You are pulling your weight in the relationship. I am not attracted to the "stay at home dad" but I know many career minded women could probably benefit from that type of person. Hell, I don't even want to be a stay at home mom, I want my own funds.
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    Kinda odd that your male coworker brags about being a stay at home dad, yet is your co worker?

    But I don't disagree with you. My DW makes the money in the house. And though I do work part time as a trainer, I do all the cooking, cleaning, homework help, etc. and don't mind it.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png

  • StealthHealth
    StealthHealth Posts: 2,417 Member
    Options
    The way that people behave at work is not a reliable indicator of how they behave at home.

    My 1st wife worked very hard in her job: she was paid by per product she produced and was a top earner at her company (I had a scientific based job: Our wages were about equal) but when she got home she did nothing. Her argument was that she worked incredibly hard for 8 hours a day and, that because I had an easy job which involved sitting down a lot then, the household jobs were predominantly mine.

    It wasn't the deal breaker in the relationship but it was sometimes a source of tension.
  • toned_thugs_n_harmony
    toned_thugs_n_harmony Posts: 1,001 Member
    Options
    maybe their wives like to take care of them?

    maybe they are the greatest dads ever and they're gonna, idk...spend their time with their kids?

    or maybe you're just jealous that they don't have to work anymore because their significant other makes enough money for the both of them?

    either way, it's not your life so who cares.
  • PintsizedPunky
    PintsizedPunky Posts: 22 Member
    Options
    Meow
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,182 Member
    edited June 2016
    Options
    #idreamskinny85, I hear you. When by daughter was working as a nurse and taking classes on-line to complete a bachelor's degree, she met a dude on some site and in her words, "found him to be sufficiently boring". She was willing to form a friendship with him. It blossomed into a serious intent to marry. She graduated with her bachelor's degree and got a pay raise. By the time they did marry she was earning 2x his income. She was not finished with school, and she made sure he wasn't either. She kicked his posterior into college and made him complete his Associates degree and get a better job while she went back and got her Master's degree. She's still making 3x to 4x his income, but he's aware that he has to earn his truck and his toys. They have a real nice house now.
  • enterdanger
    enterdanger Posts: 2,447 Member
    Options
    I've got 2 kids with a 3rd on the way....I'd rather go to work than stay home with them. It's nice. I get to talk to adults, eat a hot meal, and be some where clean for 8 hours. Hubs and I both work although I dare say I've edged him in income the past couple of years. ha...sorry we are really competitive.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,523 Member
    Options
    newmeadow wrote: »
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    Kinda odd that your male coworker brags about being a stay at home dad, yet is your co worker?

    But I don't disagree with you. My DW makes the money in the house. And though I do work part time as a trainer, I do all the cooking, cleaning, homework help, etc. and don't mind it.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png

    But do you make the kitchen sink gleam and sparkle?
    Every night after dinner.
    Is the laundry pressed, starched and infused with the aroma of wildflowers?
    Lol, no way I'm ironing clothes, but it is infused with nice smelling Downey.
    Do you secretly ignore the crumbs underneath the couch cushions?
    Lol, I used to sell vacuums door to door, so I'm kinda of a clean freak. Are there crumbs? Maybe if you looked really hard like a forensic scientist.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png

  • 2011rocket3touring
    2011rocket3touring Posts: 1,346 Member
    Options
    Due to circumstances beyond my control, I've been house husband a few times....
    I kept the house clean, laundry done and had dinner for my wife ready as soon as she walked in the door. I was a hairy chested June Cleaver...
  • idreamskinny85
    idreamskinny85 Posts: 38 Member
    Options
    Actually my significant other is a psychiatrist, but I still work. :)
    toni_leigh820 wrote: »
    maybe their wives like to take care of them?

    maybe they are the greatest dads ever and they're gonna, idk...spend their time with their kids?

    or maybe you're just jealous that they don't have to work anymore because their significant other makes enough money for the both of them?

    either way, it's not your life so who cares.

  • idreamskinny85
    idreamskinny85 Posts: 38 Member
    Options
    synchkat wrote: »
    I'm unclear how they can be stay at home dads while working

    and as a stay at home mom lots of people think I just sit at home doing nothing all day long. You aren't stuck up you are just ill informed and judgmental. You might clean up after these guys at work but you don't know what they do at home. I stay home because often my husband's pay cheque is more than I'd make a year. We'd rather I raise our child than a nanny.

    If you are amazing at home that is wonderful. However, I met some guys with wives who don't really do anything at home. I am just saying if you are going to stay at home, be amazing!!! Have a home cooked dinner ready, clean the house, etc etc. Dont just chill at home. Yes, I am judgemental. Everyone is judgemental to some point. You judge people when they enter the room for an interview, you judge someone based on their attractiveness, you judge someone based on their actions. For example, if someone is never doing anything, you may consider them lazy. Everybody is judgemental to some extent.
  • toned_thugs_n_harmony
    toned_thugs_n_harmony Posts: 1,001 Member
    Options
    idreamskinny85 wrote: »
    Actually my significant other is a psychiatrist, but I still work. :)
    toni_leigh820 wrote: »
    maybe their wives like to take care of them?

    maybe they are the greatest dads ever and they're gonna, idk...spend their time with their kids?

    or maybe you're just jealous that they don't have to work anymore because their significant other makes enough money for the both of them?

    either way, it's not your life so who cares.

    congrats to him!

    so maybe I shouldn't have judged you, just like you shouldn't judge them when you don't know what goes on in their home. all I'm sayin.

  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,595 Member
    Options
    newmeadow wrote: »
    All I really want to know is, why are you cleaning up after them at work?


    That's my question too!!

Categories