Boyfriend wants to gain weight while I want to lose it...suggestions?



  • NaturalNancy
    NaturalNancy Posts: 1,094 Member
    People can be seriously rude on here... Ignore them...
    Meal prepping is a good idea.
    Can u make a menu for the week then shop for it every Sunday... ?
    In this situation I think planning could be really helpful.
    When you have time you could try to cook simple things you enjoy...
    For example you could buy fat free stuff etc. and his could be full fat.

    If he's cooking you could eat what he cooks and log it and pay attention to portion sizes.

    Also, keep healthy snack on hand and available;
    Fat free cottage cheese
    Apple slices
    String cheese
    Boiled eggs
    Baby carrots
    Snap peas
    Low fat popcorn

    So you're not starving.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,426 Member
    edited June 2016
    A lot of people live with others who are a different age, height, weight, gender and activity level. We need different amounts based on all of that and our goals. A bigger or more active person needs more calories. A child needs different calories than a 30 year old.
    The best advice I have is you both take resposibility for yourselves because you are adults. Are you sharing every meal together? Probably not. This isn't that big of a deal to each make your own choices.
    If you eat out look up nutritional info and make better choices.
    Put more vegetables on your plate. Take smaller portions of higher calorie stuff. Log everything. Stick to your own calorie goal.
    He should eat more calorie dense foods or take larger portions. Log everything. He should stick to his own calorie goal.
    Here are some foods he can add to his day-> You should limit or moderate your consumption of those foods.
  • amusedmonkey
    amusedmonkey Posts: 10,331 Member
    In addition to portion size, the same thing can be made low and high calorie with only small modifications. Popcorn: butter on his salt on yours
    Mashed potatoes: extra gravy for him
    Pizza: sprinkle less cheese on the portion you plan to eat and extra cheese on the rest
    Fried chicken: he eats the skin and you peel it off or only eat some of it
    Salad: hold the dressing, then each of you could add as much or as little dressing (or even a different dressing) to your portions and he sprinkles some nuts on his
    Pancakes: butter for him berries for you
    Grilled chicken: he gets the thigh you get the breast
    Yogurt: you get reduced fat he gets full fat (or adds sour cream to his, trust me it tastes amazing)
    Sandwich: yours is open face with mustard instead of mayo and his is not, with extra mayo and cheese

    Not saying you can't eat thighs, gravy or skin, it's just sometimes we make certain choices where the calories feel more valuable elsewhere, wherever you deem them valuable.

  • ASKyle
    ASKyle Posts: 1,475 Member
    You eat less than him. Period.

    He gets rice with his stir fry, you get whatever amount fits in your calorie goal (even if it's none!)

    He gets a footlong, you get a 6 inch. Etc etc etc.

    Learn to cook basic things! Just think a protein, a vegetable side, and a starch. Not everything has to be a complicated recipe. Weekly I just throw some chicken thighs and asparagus on the grill. No mixing or measuring (besides the raw chicken weight of course ;) )
  • brower47
    brower47 Posts: 16,356 Member
    Eat the same foods. Eat as many calories to put you in a deficit. He eats as much to put him in a surplus.


    This works for at home and for eating out!
  • gradchica27
    gradchica27 Posts: 777 Member
    My husband is 6' and maaaaybe 143, so I understand. I give him more food, bread/rice/pasta, and I eat more vegetables and skip/limit the high cal carbs bc they don't fill me up.

    I also structure my eating to have more calories available for dinner, so that makes it easier. I keep yogurt (Noosa...yum!) for evening snacks while he eats cookies or ice cream.
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,465 Member
    I'm in the same boat. It's not as easy as many people on here act. I know your problem because he consumes an enormous amount of calories and junk food and he never gains weight! So all of these foods are in the house and I have to try to ignore them. It's really hard. Until I started this app I was consuming an immense amount of calories with him. Now that I'm aware it helps me. I do the majority of the grocery shopping and if I didn't come home with snacks he would hate it so I buy snacks that aren't tempting to me but that he likes. He also eats a lot late at night so I just give myself a cut off time and don't join him in the late night binges. At first it was hard but now I don't want to late at night because I have goals I want to achieve. Sometimes I'm envious that he can eat anything but I remind myself how good I will look if I don't. My father also has health issues and it is a good daily reminder for me to eat healthy and workout because life is short. Good luck with your journey. : )

    The information IS simple, CI<CO. Eat less, move more. The mental part is hard. OP was asking what to eat, so that part is simple. If she were asking about the mental aspect, it would be a completely different discussion.

    OP, please don't get hung up on a few comments. Ignore them and search for the gems. Unfortunately, that's one of the pitfalls of an open, public, discussion forum.
  • fishshark
    fishshark Posts: 1,886 Member
    as pretty much everyone else said just eat less. My husband is a pro athlete and good lord that guy can eat. (i could probbaly eat more then him but i clearly dont burn like he does) he wants chicken alfredo i weigh my stuff out and eat less... he wants pot roast and mashed potatoes i weight my portion out. its so simple.
  • Huffdogg
    Huffdogg Posts: 1,963 Member
    Is your problem not getting satiated or not liking the same foods? Everyone who says "order something different when you go out" is pretty much on point as far as that goes, but for the at-home stuff, there's plenty of ways for him to dress up a meal to add calories, and for you to dress it down to reduce them. Prepare a base meal of protein and vegetables, for instance, and while he can afford to add a fatty sauce, you cannot. Or he can add a dessert or second (even third) helpings while you need to replace those with leafy greens or the like.