When nothing appeals to you at a restaurant...

Francl27
Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
edited December 2 in Food and Nutrition
What do you do? Sigh.

Going out for lunch with family, and I didn't pick the place, and there's just nothing on the menu that appeals to me. It's an Italian with a lot of high calorie options, pizza, pasta in sauce, sandwiches (that come with chips), fried meat with sauce, the only 'light fare' options are basically overpriced greens with a piece of protein... ugh no, thanks. They have more interesting salads but they are tiny and expensive.

I absolutely don't want to waste a ton of calories on something I don't even want (and this week has been bad and I don't want to make it worse).. but we're going to go rowing after and I need some food.

What do you do? Thinking of asking for that grilled salmon but with veggies instead (but I usually need some complex carbs to feel full so it sucks either way). For all I know it's going to be a special menu for Father's Day too...

Eating before is not an option as we have to drive 1.5 hour to get there.

Seriously I hate eating out and having to be social sometimes.
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Replies

  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    bpetrosky wrote: »
    Generally, I pick something that is closest to my needs. For me, that's usually something with a grilled or sauteed protein and roasted vegetables, but sometimes I go with soup or a salad. I often am in situations where I don't have the choice of restaurant and have to make do, so knowing that I won't do any real damage and can go back to my routine when I'm home is empowering.

    Honestly, it sounds like your ambivalence has more to with not having control over the day's plans with your family. Do you frequently feel this way when you're not the one making the decisions?

    Not at all. I just don't like that restaurant because the only low calorie options are salad, like I said. And salads don't fill me up and I find them extremely boring. I'm a foodie. I don't like boring food. Going to a restaurant and having to eat boring food makes me sad.

    But I can't really tell myself that it's just one meal etc... it's been a bad week, as I said. And wasting calories on high calorie foods I don't even want just annoys me. I haven't found food cooked in sauce appealing in years, so Italian restaurants are often a problem.. that's why I almost never pick those. And I've been dealing with hypoglycemia symptoms (normal for me before TOM shows up) and want to avoid high carb foods too.

    I just don't get why restaurants never offer some simple grilled protein and veggies (which I don't find boring when cooked properly). It's always salads. Ugh.
  • bpetrosky
    bpetrosky Posts: 3,911 Member
    Would you feel better if your family picked another restaurant that had items you preferred?
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    edited June 2016
    bpetrosky wrote: »
    Would you feel better if your family picked another restaurant that had items you preferred?

    Yeah definitely, lol. The problem isn't that others pick, it's that a lot of restaurants just don't have much in term of lower calorie options... Eating out is always a pain for me as a whole though, to be fair (because I'm sick of salads). Italian restaurants are the worst too... I don't mind spending more calories on an entree once in a while, but it has to be something I really want (I totally indulged on some schnitzel the other day, for example). Otherwise I'd much rather save my calories for something else.

    The joys of having to watch what you eat. I wonder how low carb/paleo people do it.
  • CaliforniaAJ
    CaliforniaAJ Posts: 196 Member
    It's easy, order 'off menu'!

    Let's say there is a meatball pasta dish and you fancy the meatballs. Ask for the meatballs, no sauce, and some veggies.
    Or choose a bolognese and have it with veggies rather than pasta.
    If you make an effort, you can always find something that works.
    Alternatively, don't eat! You can always say you are not feeling well and just enjoy the outing and sip water and have something at home later.

    As a low carber I have been faced with a bacon butty being the only option and just ate the bacon from the middle! There is always a way :-)
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    It's easy, order 'off menu'!

    Let's say there is a meatball pasta dish and you fancy the meatballs. Ask for the meatballs, no sauce, and some veggies.
    Or choose a bolognese and have it with veggies rather than pasta.
    If you make an effort, you can always find something that works.
    Alternatively, don't eat! You can always say you are not feeling well and just enjoy the outing and sip water and have something at home later.

    As a low carber I have been faced with a bacon butty being the only option and just ate the bacon from the middle! There is always a way :-)

    Yeah I just avoid conflict as a whole so I never really feel comfortable doing that... sigh. I'll probably do it though... grilled salmon with veggies. At least it beats salad.

    Not eating is not an option at all unfortunately, don't want to crash in the middle of our canoe ride.
  • Timorous_Beastie
    Timorous_Beastie Posts: 595 Member
    If you're going to be rowing a whole bunch, get some pasta. I'd get pasta with chicken breast and vegetables. Ask for the sauce on the side and only add a little, if you're worried about the calories.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    If you're going to be rowing a whole bunch, get some pasta. I'd get pasta with chicken breast and vegetables. Ask for the sauce on the side and only add a little, if you're worried about the calories.

    The only chicken on their menu is breaded and fried though... that's why I was going to go with salmon. I don't think that canoeing will burn a ton of calories either. And all the pasta dishes come with cream sauce, of course. I guess I could ask for shrimp scampi without sauce, lol. I'd just rather have veggies than all that pasta.

    They had a smaller menu on Mother's Day too, so who knows what will actually be available. Bleh.
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 18,326 Member
    Crazy thought - give them a call and ask if they have a special menu for Fathers Day?
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    edited June 2016
    Crazy thought - give them a call and ask if they have a special menu for Fathers Day?

    Doesn't really matter, I'll find out anyway, lol.
    Over the years I have found that most restaurants are used to having people order something different from time to time, especially as people have become more aware of food allergies, etc. I don't think it unusual anymore.

    I find that I am always accommodated and usually fussed over more than a normal guest, to make sure I have something I can eat and will enjoy.

    If you want control over what you eat, take it! Just order confidently. You can say things like 'I hope it's not a hassle, but could I please order...." or "I would LOVE the ...., but can I have it with just..."

    I have never been told that I can't order that way. Remember, they have all the ingredients anyway, you are just asking for a different 'mix'.

    True. Although some places don't have veggies (crazy, I know!). Or some already have things ready and can't make things without sauce/dressing (yep... happened to me too).
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    edited June 2016
    rainbowbow wrote: »
    I'll be honest, I used to experience what you're feeling but that has changed since i've learned the following technique.

    -> Dont eat anything else that day.

    There, i said it. That's it. Don't want to worry about the calories in your meal? Don't want to feel like you have to eat a 1/4 portion in order to not go over total calories? Don't want to pay $$$ for a salad which doesn't fill you up or satisfy you? Then just Intermittently Fast that day and only eat that meal.

    This has seriously changed the way i feel about eating out as a female who maintains on ~1,600 calories (max 1,700 if i've just really pushed it that day). I am an active person, i hit the gym 4x a week, I'm a personal trainer, HOWEVER, I am hypothyroid and have some issues with other hormones (like prolactin, and other pituitary hormones) so I can't just eat a crap ton of calories. My maintenance is about 20% lower than it should be because of these issues.

    When i used to eat out i would feel guilty, angry at my options, resentful that i have to watch what i'm eating, and all of this was compounded by the fact that i've been a vegetarian my entire life and there is usually 1 MAYBE 2 vegetarian options I can eat when i go out. Imagine that. Going into a restaurant and you can literally only eat 1 item on the menu.

    Now, if i know i'm going to out i plan the rest of the day accordingly. Maybe i'll fast, maybe i'll have some BCAAs, maybe i'll have a protein bar or a cup of greek yogurt. Otherwise I know that when i go to this restaurant i can usually eat to my heart's content without worrying about destroying my total daily calorie goal.

    As someone who used MFP to lose weight (when i joined in 2011!) this has been absolutely crucial in my maintenance phase and switching to this routine has allowed me the sanity of eating out with friends and loved ones without being the "debbie downer who needs special treatment".

    But I can't. I have hypoglycemia issues so I typically can't skip meals or I get weak/dizzy. It would be so much easier otherwise! Same reason I need breakfast... can't go much later than 9am without food (plus TOM is due soon and I've been hungrier lately, hence the bad week).

    I feel bad for vegetarians though! Must be even worse. Ugh.
  • rainbowbow
    rainbowbow Posts: 7,490 Member
    Francl27 wrote: »
    rainbowbow wrote: »
    I'll be honest, I used to experience what you're feeling but that has changed since i've learned the following technique.

    -> Dont eat anything else that day.

    There, i said it. That's it. Don't want to worry about the calories in your meal? Don't want to feel like you have to eat a 1/4 portion in order to not go over total calories? Don't want to pay $$$ for a salad which doesn't fill you up or satisfy you? Then just Intermittently Fast that day and only eat that meal.

    This has seriously changed the way i feel about eating out as a female who maintains on ~1,600 calories (max 1,700 if i've just really pushed it that day). I am an active person, i hit the gym 4x a week, I'm a personal trainer, HOWEVER, I am hypothyroid and have some issues with other hormones (like prolactin, and other pituitary hormones) so I can't just eat a crap ton of calories. My maintenance is about 20% lower than it should be because of these issues.

    When i used to eat out i would feel guilty, angry at my options, resentful that i have to watch what i'm eating, and all of this was compounded by the fact that i've been a vegetarian my entire life and there is usually 1 MAYBE 2 vegetarian options I can eat when i go out. Imagine that. Going into a restaurant and you can literally only eat 1 item on the menu.

    Now, if i know i'm going to out i plan the rest of the day accordingly. Maybe i'll fast, maybe i'll have some BCAAs, maybe i'll have a protein bar or a cup of greek yogurt. Otherwise I know that when i go to this restaurant i can usually eat to my heart's content without worrying about destroying my total daily calorie goal.

    As someone who used MFP to lose weight (when i joined in 2011!) this has been absolutely crucial in my maintenance phase and switching to this routine has allowed me the sanity of eating out with friends and loved ones without being the "debbie downer who needs special treatment".

    But I can't. I have hypoglycemia issues so I typically can't skip meals or I get weak/dizzy. It would be so much easier otherwise! Same reason I need breakfast... can't go much later than 9am without food (plus TOM is due soon and I've been hungrier lately, hence the bad week).

    I feel bad for vegetarians though! Must be even worse. Ugh.

    damn, that sucks! doing IF atleast makes it tolerable :(

  • amyk0202
    amyk0202 Posts: 666 Member
    I am a horribly picky eater. I always special order my food at restaurants. They are always happy to do it. Really, the server probably won't think anything of it. Order the salmon & veggies or pasta with sauce on the side or whatever you think you might want when you get there. They will make it for you.
  • dlkfox
    dlkfox Posts: 463 Member
    I'm on team Off Menu. I have a dairy allergy, so I've learned just to do what I gotta do. Grilled salmon and veggies sounds good -- just have them add some plain pasta or potato for your carb. You'll do just fine.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    Sounds like you've kind of decided something to order with salmon and vegetables.

    You could pack food from home for yourself and just not eat while at the restaurant. Eat your preferred food in the car or right before you go rowing and just get a drink at the restaurant.
  • teagin2002
    teagin2002 Posts: 1,900 Member
    I always look for a protein they don't have to add lots of fat too like a lean cut of steak or salmon and either 2 portions of vegetables or one vergitable and while grain bagget

    If it's an Italian restraunt I stick to the 2 veggie portion, the tend to be more calories then most other restraunts
  • Triathlete1502
    Triathlete1502 Posts: 103 Member
    Does the restaurant have Risotto? Quite a few of my Italian friends have risottos as a staple. And if I'm not mistaken, risottos fall under the complex carbs category.

    In any case, you'd be needing some energy to canoe afterwards. And Father's Day happens only once a year.

    Enjoy your family outing!
  • RodaRose
    RodaRose Posts: 9,562 Member
    Order off menu or ask the restaurant to give you a half portion of one if the pasta /breaded dishes (they will probably charge you the same )
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    minizebu wrote: »
    This thread reads like a lot of threads where one person says they've "tried everything" but they can't lose weight no matter what they do. People respond and the OP raises an objection to every single suggestion, explaining why each suggestion won't work because of XYZ reason.

    @Francl27, If you reread this thread today, I think you'll be able to see that you were doing exactly that. I think that maybe you were just not in the best of moods yesterday. I don't think that you even realize that you were doing this.

    If I had to guess, I think that the first person who responded might have hit the nail on the head
    bpetrosky wrote: »
    sounds like your ambivalence has more to with not having control over the day's plans with your family
    but you said that is not the case.

    It's too late now, I suspect, because you've probably already set off on your journey and you won't see this until later, but, if you don't want the "conflict" of ordering off the menu, then Lounmoun's suggestion seemed like a good one: pack some food from home to eat in the car in route to your destination and then just enjoy your family's company while they eat.

    Your point would be a good one... except that I typically only post on the forum when I've considered most of the options already... so yeah, obviously I will object to most suggestions, because if it was actually an option, I would probably have done that and not posted on the forums (I've been on MFP for 3.5 years. I know how it works by now).

    You'll notice that it's typically the case for my posts... I post because I'm frustrated. So yes, typically I've tried pretty much everything before posting (or I wouldn't be frustrated and posting). So I do end up shooting down most suggestions (and I know it tends to piss off people). But what can I say... If it was easy for me, I would have found a solution and I wouldn't be posting).

    Hope it makes sense..

    Anyway, they had a salmon dish with almond crust on the menu - so I asked for grilled instead. It wasn't a problem and it came with a small portion of risotto and veggies - I'd be shocked if the whole thing was over 450 calories, it really wasn't a lot of food. But it was fine and it was tasty, so all good.
    teagin2002 wrote: »
    I always look for a protein they don't have to add lots of fat too like a lean cut of steak or salmon and either 2 portions of vegetables or one vergitable and while grain bagget

    If it's an Italian restraunt I stick to the 2 veggie portion, the tend to be more calories then most other restraunts

    Well it's what I do typically too, but a lot of restaurants don't have that option at all. I know that it was a nightmare when I was traveling last year - lots of places only had coleslaw, fries, or side salads (ugh) as options for sides, for example... they didn't even have veggies. Or sandwiches were already assembled, dishes all prepared so you couldn't ask for the sauce on the side.. that's why I often don't even want to bother going to some places, because I don't want to be stuck with no options because they can't put the sauce on the side.
  • pdxwine
    pdxwine Posts: 389 Member
    I am not sure what restaurants you are going to, so this may skew my response.

    I do not eat out, often, but when I do, it is in higher end eateries. This means that I am able to select items that can be modified. For me, that is sodium and fat.

    My experience is that restaurants will work with dietary restrictions. Here is a photo of a modification that I was able to make. While my table-mates were eating rich foods, I had a beautiful fish dinner. sccgjlgy4r1n.jpg
  • Noreenmarie1234
    Noreenmarie1234 Posts: 7,492 Member
    I don't always order off the menu. I usually tell the server I have allergies and intolerances and ask if I could have _______(insert what I want like grilled chicken with no oil veg, sweet potato, salad, etc). I've never had a restaurant say no we cant give you that lol
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 25,681 Member
    Francl27 wrote: »
    What do you do? Sigh.

    My husband and I have walked into restaurants, looked over the menu ... and walked out again.

    We did that occasionally before I started dieting with MFP, but since I started with MFP, we've done that quite a bit. One of the things I told myself was that I was not going to waste calories on foods I didn't like. If a restaurant doesn't have what I like ... I leave.

    But if I'm really stuck, I go with the vegetarian option. Pumpkin and spinach risotto or something like that.

  • Packerjohn
    Packerjohn Posts: 4,855 Member
    It's one meal on one day. Just eat part of a pasta dish, or a boring salad. You will live to dine at the next meal.

    Hope it was a fun day.
  • extra_medium
    extra_medium Posts: 1,525 Member
    Sadly this has never happened to me.
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
    You can go off menu as suggested. I also look to the appetizers and sides.
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    you must get frustrated a lot.
This discussion has been closed.