So very broken.

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  • ckmama
    ckmama Posts: 1,668 Member
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    I'm with you. I've amended my goals to be a final weight of 165 (from 145, with a muscle mass of 136, I found out later). I set mini goals, figuring 10 pounds every two months wouldn't be too bad... And I made my first one! I hit 210 by March 31. Then came 200 by May 31. I hit 201 by about May 24. Then... I don't know what happened. I'm STILL bouncing around between 202 and 204, and I can't get under 200 to save my life. I even did the 30DS, and while I lost thirty six inches that way, I lost ZERO pounds. Not one. Still haven't. Don't know why, but I do know it's incredibly frustrating, maddening, and boy would it be nice to just not care and do whatever the blazes I feel like again. It's even worse knowing I've been busting my butt working out and still nothing. But... Here I am. Dunno if it's stubborn, stupid, insane or dedication, but I'm still here.

    About 3 years ago I dropped from 272 to 190. and maintained it for 3 years. When I hit the 200 lb mark it did the same thing to me. I think it is a mental thing. Break it. See it as a glass ceiling you are about to burst thru and noone is going to stop you.
  • klbfrisbee
    klbfrisbee Posts: 8
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    Don't deprive yourself too much, if you do; you will feel like cheating, once you start cheating, you tend to toss in the towel. I tell my self, I can still have bacon, beer, and cheesecake!!, just not all three in the same day.
    I hate to exercise so I replace that with things i like to do; like get out in the garden and weed whack, or scrub the heck out of the kitchen and bathrooms , I mean to the point of breaking a big sweat. I feel so good ,both to have a clean kitchen and I worked off some stubborn fat calories. tomorrow I PAINT THE SHUTTERS. you can do this, don't beat yourself up, just change the routine.
  • lovinmamaxo
    lovinmamaxo Posts: 368 Member
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    Keep your head up girl.. it really is one day at a time. It seems like so far away but it comes off relatively quicker especially in us starting out in higher numbers. I too started at over 200lbs to lose. I now have to lose 164lbs to be at my goal weight of 190lbs. When i started i truly didn't seen an end in sight but it can be done with dedication and loving yourself enough to want to be healthier.

    Yeah we all have a long way to go but i do recommend truly taking it one day at a time... a year goes by quicker than you think! You can do this.
  • bodybliss2
    bodybliss2 Posts: 10
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    You will get there but only if YOU BELIEVE you will. Noone else can do it but YOU.
    Do you notice how your negative thoughts get in the way of you feeling good about yourself? Right now? At this current time and at your current weight?? Our thoughts become our reality and I know it seems like an easy enough concept to grasp, but when you really THINK about it, you will realise it all the more.
    We are the creator of our thoughts and those thoughts can either lead us UP or DOWN, depending on whether you choose to believe them or not.

    I know its so easy to come on here and have people say, 'you can do it' or 'just one day at a time' but all of that is meaningless unless you BELIEVE you can do it.
    Start by believing yourself WORTHY of your goal.
    If you want to be that hot chick who guys wanna be with and girls wanna hate(LOL) then you have to believe you are WORTH making that required effort for.
    Its all very well to lose the weight and I congratulate those who do, but if you do not change the way you feel about yourself WITHIN you, then all that success will be for nothing because the same issues that led you to overeat in the first place will make themselves evident again.

    Even just a few minutes a day looking yourself in the mirror and saying 'I AM WORTH IT!' and 'I CAN DO IT!' can have major benefits to your self esteem.

    Believe yourself worthy because you ARE worthy and once you realize and BELIEVE that, then things will start looking up for you okay! Do you know the average person thinks about 50,000 thoughts a day??? Now that is ALOT of thoughts and when you consider that where we are today is a direct result of our thoughts, you'll realize how important and VITAL it is that we start thinking good, positive thoughts! You will get there, but its all about whether you believe you can.

    All the best!!xox
  • BabyDuchess
    BabyDuchess Posts: 353 Member
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    I started out with 145 to lose and 6 months later I only have 85 left. I can only tell you what worked for me. I NEVER, EVER went there in my mind about the big picture. I set small goals for myself, which were very attainable to get my confidence level up. I started out by eliminating trigger foods, then I started eating leaner meats, then I started eating grilled, baked or broiled vs. fried....even when I went to a fast-food restaurant. I started eating more fresh fruits and vegetables and drinking a ton of water, which I hated before this.....I drink ice-water, which burns more calories....lol Then when the weight started coming off I started working out at home and did that for a couple of months until I saved the money to pay for the gym.....best decision I ever made! I made a large friend base at the gym immediately since I figured I was going to be spending so much time there.....great to have encouragement from every source you can get it from....lol Then I got to know and eventually hired a trainer....well actually, I take a weight lifting class of his and I'm signing up for another six weeks and then who knows from there. Please don't get discouraged. We didn't get this way overnight and shouldn't expect it to come off quickly because if It did, where would the reward be? it would be way to easy to gain it back if it was too easy to take it off, wouldn't it? I think so. It's hard work and anyone that tells you differently, isn't being honest. But really, what alternative do you have? You can either lose it at a healthy rate without giving up on yourself or you can give up and stay 200 lbs overweight or get bigger. I'm sorry if this seems harsh but this is what I told myself and the realization I had to come to in order to push myself to the point of doing something about it. You can do anything you tell yourself you can or you can fail if you set yourself up for failure but the choice is ALWAYS yours! :flowerforyou:
  • miriamtorason
    miriamtorason Posts: 208 Member
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    I'm with you. I've amended my goals to be a final weight of 165 (from 145, with a muscle mass of 136, I found out later). I set mini goals, figuring 10 pounds every two months wouldn't be too bad... And I made my first one! I hit 210 by March 31. Then came 200 by May 31. I hit 201 by about May 24. Then... I don't know what happened. I'm STILL bouncing around between 202 and 204, and I can't get under 200 to save my life. I even did the 30DS, and while I lost thirty six inches that way, I lost ZERO pounds. Not one. Still haven't. Don't know why, but I do know it's incredibly frustrating, maddening, and boy would it be nice to just not care and do whatever the blazes I feel like again. It's even worse knowing I've been busting my butt working out and still nothing. But... Here I am. Dunno if it's stubborn, stupid, insane or dedication, but I'm still here.

    About 3 years ago I dropped from 272 to 190. and maintained it for 3 years. When I hit the 200 lb mark it did the same thing to me. I think it is a mental thing. Break it. See it as a glass ceiling you are about to burst thru and noone is going to stop you.
    Boy, do I hope that's the case. I've been sitting here forever, and it's a pain in the @$$! What really drives me nuts is that I'm trying to fit into a dress. I almost fit into it before I did 30DS. Then I lost 3-4" in my belly, hips, and thighs. The dress *still* doesn't fit - and according to my measurements and the manufacturer's website, I should have 4" clearance all over! GAH! *thud*

    Okay, !thread-hijack...
  • rosieflo
    rosieflo Posts: 218
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    Thank you all for your support...your kind words...your friend requests. I'm worn out from all the crying I've been doing tonight, but I'm waking up to a brand new world tomoroow. Thanks.
  • achampionsheart
    achampionsheart Posts: 1,020 Member
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    Honey, we are all broken in our own way. It is ok to be broken, you have to be real with yourself. If you feel like crying, cry and get it out. Then pick yourself up, pick up a bottle of water, and exercise. work out the frustration on a piece of equipment. The first weight you need to lose is not fat, it is the attitude that youre NOT going to do this....you can.....but no one can do it for you.....you have to pick yourself up and push yourself....if you really want to lose that much, then youre going to have to work at it EVERYDAY.....do set small goals AND reward yourself for your success...but dont use food as a reward....use food to live, dont live for food.....i am here and so is everyone else to support you.....each step is important in the journey...live strong sweetie!!!!
  • fifon1
    fifon1 Posts: 17
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    hey its ok to feel the way you feel.. afterall, it is a hard and long battle... and its definitely okay to take 1 or 2 days off.. go do things u that makes u happy whatever that maybe.... dont think about all of this at all.. i know its easier said that done.. but u can try.. its normal that u always will look at the 200lbs to go... but take days off to celebrate how far u have come.. go buy new dresses.. go let ur hair down.. stop and smell the flowers! :) get back at it when ur ready.. it always work for me... hope it will for u too!! good luck!!
  • healthyjen342
    healthyjen342 Posts: 1,435 Member
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    JUST KEEP TRYING! I have felt the SAME WAY! Time and Patience is key! (((hugs)))
  • SMarie10
    SMarie10 Posts: 956 Member
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    Think you should read this post - I believe in personal responsibility and doing it for the right reasons. Not trying to be harsh, but really it is up to you.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/278516-friends-can-only-take-you-so-far
  • celestedavis
    celestedavis Posts: 37 Member
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    Broken things get fixed! Broken is the best place to be because we realize we can't do it alone. Do you watch episodes of biggest loser or extreme makeover weight loss edition? They are encouraging because you see the real struggle (esp extreme makeover weight loss).

    The one step at a time sounds trite, but it is how any trip is handled. If you were driving you would count short distances, such as 50 miles to the next Ruby Tuesdays, lol. So look at this journey and set a reasonable destination, maybe stop focusing on pounds and change your goal to movement. Maybe if you walk 10 minutes set a new goal for 12 or if you bike for 15 minutes, bump it up to 18 or increase your hills or difficulty. If you focus on increasing your movement your pounds will be affected!

    Maybe another milestone goal would be drinking more water, it takes 3 molecules of water to flush away 1 molecule of fat.

    So rather than focusing on the pounds, choose a different measure, one that you actually can control (since we can't control pounds ie: today I am removing 3 pounds) but make it a measure that will benefit your pounds goal as a side benefit.

    Lastly, I asked God for wisdom on removing my last 40 pounds (I've lost 76 and kept it off for 6 years). He showed me I needed to eliminate gluten and up my exercise so I was burning 4 digits a day, that has made a huge difference! I lost 3 inches and 2.5 pounds in the first week after being stuck at the same place for 6 years!
  • beckyinma
    beckyinma Posts: 1,433 Member
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    One pair of pants at a time girl! Find a pair of pants in your closet, the next size down, and make them your goal. Stick with it, one lb at a time, you CAN do it!

    I'm so glad you came HERE TO VENT instead of opening the fridge when you felt frustrated! I too get very flustered when I consider how much I still have to go. I think of the next 1/3 of my battle, and getting over that half-way point and wonder if i'll be able to get past my wedding weight...then I'll still have 25lb that I want to go! But I keep logging, keep venting here when I'm frustrated, instead of hitting the fridge, because typing away 10 calories to make someone feel better makes me feel 10 times better than 700 calories worth of chips and dip would...every time, guaranteed!

    On my profile I have a saying, that I have to read every single darn day: "If the journey you're on is easy, then you're not working hard enough" This is not an easy thing to do, but you have to put one foot in front of the other, and force it, or you're just going to go back to your old destructive habits...

    Remember, small goals, 1lb at a time...
  • SabrinaJL
    SabrinaJL Posts: 1,579 Member
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    How am I ever going to lose over 200 lbs? How will I ever be healthy?

    By not giving up. Just by working out regularly and making better food choices, you ARE being healthy even if it's taking a while for the lbs to come off. Hang in there, buddy.
  • mrstudz
    mrstudz Posts: 30 Member
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    Its truly is a never ending cycle until you break it.

    The only way you ever gonna be happy is if you get off your *kitten*, get off the computer typing on these forums and get on the treadmill.

    Its gonna take you at least 3 years..might as well start now!!!!
  • TamiLinc
    TamiLinc Posts: 70 Member
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    I feel this sometimes too. :( however i looked at your pictures and you new pic looks really good. i can tell you have lost a lot of weight in your face!! You can do this.. and this is why we all are here.. to help each other
  • minnie86
    minnie86 Posts: 187
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    I am sorry you are feeling this way. I've felt this way too. I know you are expecting to hear "one step at a time." Maybe I'm giving you the same advise, but remember that no matter what is your weight, you are a beautiful person and you have to stay healthy. First, I would advise you to consult your physician to make sure there are no others problems that might inhibit your weight loss.

    What helpes me is to break up my goal. Instead of saying, I need to lose 50 pounds, I break it up. I'll set my goal to lose 8-10 this month. I break it up further, and say, this week I'll lose 2 pounds. I only focus on that mini-goal. If I don't do this, I'll get so overwhelmed by the time and work it will take me to lose those 50, that I will get frustrated.

    Look for things that motivate you. I love reading sucess stories every day. It keeps me motivated to eat well during the day.

    This week is a fresh new start, you can do this! You are already in the right place. best of luck!
  • DBabbit
    DBabbit Posts: 173 Member
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    Sometimes this battle seems so overwhelming. How am I ever going to lose over 200 lbs? How will I ever be healthy? I know that if I was responding to this post, I would say, "One lb, one goal at a time." But, I'm honestly at a point where all I can do is cry. I no longer feel productive. Just sad. :( Not even sure how the next lb is coming off.
    Just needed to vent.

    {{{HUGS}}}

    I weighed in at 200 lbs before I decided I needed to get serious about losing weight. Never mind the fact that I'm in a wheelchair, and exercise for me can be one of two things: (1) excruciatingly painful, or (2) excruciatingly slow. However, I've managed to lose 10lbs, and I have 55lbs. to go. You can do this!

    Yes, it is hard! I'll agree with you there. Now add a "so, what" to the end of that statement. Yes, it is hard, so what! You've decided to become healthier, and that's wonderful! Give yourself a pat on the back, cry if you need to, and then pick yourself up and put on your walking shoes!

    You should be so proud of yourself for choosing to take better care of yourself! Don't look at the final goal. I know I started getting discouraged just thinking about how I was going to ever reach mine. Start by making small changes and choose to make better choices every day. Most of the time, I'm in so much pain that my only option is bed rest. I exercise on the days I can, and I have to push myself because yes, it is hard! But, we only fail if we give up, and I don't want to see you give up. You can do this. WE can do this!

    Instant gratification has become the norm for us, and it isn't going to happen in a day or two, but so what! Keep moving, keep making healthy choices, and before long, you'll be able to say, "I met my goal, so there!" There are so many amazing, supportive people here. You are not alone. xx :flowerforyou:
  • bmw4deb
    bmw4deb Posts: 1,325 Member
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    You are not alone, there are many people here for you.
    I was just thinking the other day how christmas is only a little over 5 months away
    it comes so quick!! just think how much further down the weight scale you will be by then
    you can do this we can help, keep going girl!
  • squishyjenn
    squishyjenn Posts: 245 Member
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    I started this journey needing to lose 126 pounds. I now need to lose only 89. If you give up you are just going to get fatter and fatter and die a young death. It took you a couple of years to pack on the pounds (as did I) so it will take you a couple of years to lose the pounds (as will I) I don't mean to sound mean, but you got your way into the mess so you just have to get out of it. There is no magic pill to make it all go away unfortunately, so you just have to say enough is enough and not let your weight or your self confidence bring you down further into a dark hole. There is no happiness there. <3!

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