should I fight for him ?

if he has a girlfriend still he is jerking you around; keeping you on deck in case things go sour. It sounds like he wants to know he can have you without actually having to do anything to support the relationship. I would be asking "will he fight for you?" If he isn't even willing to cut this other girl lose then move on. It will be hard, and you may always have a squishy place for him in your heart, but you don't have to have drama to have love and you will find love again.

In the words of Ida Mae from the movie ghost " you in danger girl!" or at least you will be if you fight for this dude. Any man that has respect for his self as well as women, would leave his current situation and take time to heal from it first- before moving on to a new situation. I read this to my Partner btw..... Our Advice- Fall far back and work on your self. if he truly cares about you, He will leave his current relationship and take time and then come find you.

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BinaryFu wrote: »

Don't but stupid. We guys aren't that overly complicated. We want every woman on the planet we find remotely attractive. We're dogs. It's in our nature.

And if we have one already but we have another one tagging along and hanging around and showing us they want us?

That's when we men split up into two groups.

Those with honor.
and
Those who will swear we'll break up with the other one.

Those with honor either just do it, or say "Sorry, I'm taken." and make it clear, straight forward and direct. No way to confuse it with anything else.

We man up, in other words.

He's playing both you and her. He knows he had it good then, he knows he's got it good now and he knows he can have it even better (in his mind) when he can play both of you at the same time.

If he was madly in love with you and missed what he had before, he'd tell her goodbye without even giving it a second thought and he'd apologize for making you wait even that long.

^^^^^^^LISTEN TO THIS GUY^^^^^^^^^

Since he says he will never breakup with gf, you must ask yourself are you/they wanting a open relationship of sorts...if not, stop thinking it's worth it.

I went through that exact same thing for 9 years. Ours wasn't as on and off as yours and we were older when it started, but I always had my race race around him, etc, and it was on and off a few times. He got a new girlfriend, I moved away. He eventually reached out to my friend to get my number because he missed me so much and I never told anyone that my heart was breaking daily not being with him. His ex girlfriend even told his mom that she had to leave him because he was always comparing her to me and she couldn't stand it. We started talking as friends but he told me what a mistake it was ending things with me, how much he loved me and would do anything to have me back. We talked every day for months and months. It was better than it had ever been. That is until the new girlfriend he was living with called me. When I tried to confront him, he just hung up the phone. I was in FL and he was in NC, so not like I could just go confront him in person. After a year he called me. He cried, apologized, told me that he had broken up with her and she got his phone and lied and he thought I would hate him and not believe him. So, it started again, the talking, the trust building. Him calling me every single day and night. He loved me so much. But apparently not enough to end his next new relationship. This one he is now married to. All the feelings, the tears, etc was bs. He wanted to have his cake and eat it, too as the saying goes. I'm not sure if you told him how you feel, but if he poured out his feelings and said he would break up with his girlfriend then you most likely did. If so, then move on, he doesn't love you enough to leave her and do not listen to what a HARD DECISION it is. When you love someone truly like that, there is nothing that would stop you from being with them if they want too. If you havent, then you need to tell him now and give him a week. Seriously, if he loves you that much and he knows you feel it too there is no reason he won't end it like immediately. Another concern is that if he loves you like he does, he knows you are single, then what is he doing? Why didn't he already end things with her when he realized how he felt? He plays games with people's emotions? I'm not saying my situation is yours, but I wish I had really questioned those things and saved myself years of heartache. I literally ached and hurt every day not being with him.
Also, you will never feel that feeling again with anyone. It's because when you are young, you immerse yourself in that person. There is no emotional baggage, no guards up, etc. You lose yourself in them. I am now happily married. My husband is my best friend. He treats me well. He is my partner and my best friend. The feeling isn't as intense but it's different and better. There is comfort, trust, love, respect, and deep friendship in our relationship. Although, I my heart doesn't skip a beat when I hear his name, my love is deeper and stronger than anything else I have ever felt.

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1. If he really cared for you, and loved you that much, chances are, he'd of never broke up with you, or posted pics with other girls so quickly
2. He should not be saying crap like that to you when he already had another bird and you shouldn't be declaring your "undying love" for him either
3. If he's saying he's going to leave his bird for you, yet hasn't, what makes you think if you did get back together that he won't be saying that to another girl behind your back?
4. He was your childhood sweetheart, your first love! We've all had one! We all thought that no-one would ever beable to replace them, that you'll never beable to love anyone else every again ect ect
5. He's a dog, just walk away from him for good, focus on yourself and when your happy with yourself, someone better will come along and rock your little world

Take it from an old broad: NOPE. Run. You are young and have all the time in the world. Don't waste it on someone who seems to have already moved on.

If he can dump her on a whim he can dump you. ....remember you lose them like you gained them.

Go for it. Get it out of your system and fight for him. No matter what we tell you, you'll follow your feelings (which are still clinging to him).

BUT, just remember it's not gonna end well. It's gonna hurt like hell, but at least you'll know you're only second best for him - never the priority, never the only one.

Only then you'll be able to move on and forget about him... and have your eyes open for the one who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated.