Is it just me or...?

Ahhhh.
If I had more money to spend, I could buy an elliptical, more workout videos, the ankle/wrist weights I really want, new hand weights, a little pedal thing for my desk at work. I could get so much skinnier!
Well, the fact is, it doesn't work like that. It's about self-determination, not the size of your bank account.

The main thing you need to address is your depression over your entire life plan collapsing in a pile of metaphorical and literal rubble. If you're too rural to get free counseling anywhere, you're gonna have to learn to overcome it yourself. You had best learn to meditate, and do it every single day. This will help enormously.

If you don't have any control over the food you eat, go get yourself some food stamps (SNAP). That way you can contribute something to the family and make sure you've got produce on hand. You'll also have a lot more freedom.

Look around for heavy stuff. If you can find an 8 lb sledge in the garage, you have an epic-level piece of exercise equipment, capable of delivering unbelievable upper body workouts that will leave your arms and shoulders like jelly while hitting parts of your core as well. Look up sledge hammer workouts on youtube, there's a ton of them, and they're surprisingly fun.

Don't crap on rolling around on the ground until you can do a 3 minute plank. That **** is serious. Download some beginner yoga videos, and do it.

Make sure you're applying for every single job in your field. I know France is expanding their nuclear program, maybe you could get a visa, date some nice french girls for a while...

Find something to do besides working out and sitting in front of a screen. Volunteer, build stuff from construction scraps, dig in the garden, make awkward passes at uninterested girls, start a fight club, learn to play drums on a bucket, protest the **** economy down at city hall, whatever. Get excited and make stuff. If you can find a **** job, great. If not, at least you'll be doing something real. Consider hitchhiking across the country, visit some place you've always wanted to see. If you've got food stamps it's surprisingly doable, particularly if you've got the minor social graces and resourcefulness necessary to make friends on couchsurfing.com. You'll learn a lot in the process, absolutely, about yourself, about other people, about the poor, about how this society really is, and what is really possible. You've lost everything-- the only thing separating you from absolute freedom is your own outlook on life. Find real hope, the kind that pierces through despair and suffering and lets you know that everything will be okay. Face your fears. The universe will provide. And its not because of magic, but just because having faith in the world will let you see the abundance of opportunities happening every day all around you, opportunities that you are missing in your withdrawal from the world and your best self. You are free. Don't forget that. Be bold, and do something with your freedom.

I think the worse part has been to keep full between meals I have been eating plain bread because it fills me up and it is usually the only thing in the house at all times.

I ran my family of four on $800 a month for five years in grad school. It wasn't easy and we cut out a lot of things that I now think of necessities (dentist visits, for instance), but we managed.

To make this work, you will HAVE to contribute something to the grocery budget so that you have some control over what gets bought. If you can get ANY kind of job (part time at a gas station? waitstaff at Olive Garden?) you can do this.

So snack food on a tiny budget: buy whichever of these you can afford this time, next time buy a different one. Mix them up so you don't get bored.

A big brick of yellow cheese (store brand): 1 oz of cheese is approx 100 cals and good for protein and calcium. You can guess an ounce by looking at package size and then mentally dividing the brick.

A bag of whatever fresh fruit is on special. We ate a lot of apples while I was in grad school. When you have both fruit and cheese, a snack can be a few apple slices (or whatever) and a couple of slivers of cheese. No need to be boring just because you're poor!!

A jar of creamy store brand peanut butter: Spread on apples or crackers.

Crackers. Plain saltines are versatile and relatively low cal, but club crackers are nicer and are sometimes on special. Have crackers with PB or cheese.

V8 juice.

8ox package of cream cheese (store brand is fine). Soften cream cheese on shelf, then beat in about 1/4 cup of V8 juice (more or less to get the consistency you want) use as spread for crackers and use as dip for vegetables.

Celery (eat with PB and dip, above).

When you can afford to splurge, buy a small bottle of olive oil and a small bottle of vinegar. THEN

Dried pinto beans, garbanzo beans (chick peas), or black beans. Rinse, rinse, soak, rinse, and cook according to package directions, and drain. This will take several hours. Make an oil and vinegar dressing (stir it up in a small bowl if you don't have a bottle with a tight fitting lid) and stir it into some of your cooked, drained, beans.

Eat beans with bits of cheese and raw veg cut up in them for a very upscale salad.

When you can afford it, buy a small bottle of lemon juice (glass or plastic bottle is cheaper than the lemon shape)

With cooked garbanzo beans, mash them up and stir in a little olive oil and lemon juice to taste = hummus. Use as dip for veg. or spread for crackers. Also put on top of your beans with bits of cheese and veg.

Plain or wheat bagels or pitas. Use with cheese, the cr cheese dip, or the hummus.

Get a big bag of store brand mozz cheese, a bottle of pizza quick sauce. Make bagel or pita pizzas.