Some thoughts on "Starting Over"

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  • lorib642
    lorib642 Posts: 1,942 Member
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    I needed this. Thank you :)
  • AquabearGO
    AquabearGO Posts: 232 Member
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    GREAT POST! Just what I needed as I start back on my journey
  • Ladybug3129
    Ladybug3129 Posts: 18 Member
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    Wonderful and thoughtful post. I will keep coming back to it for motivation and guidance as I re-start my journey...
  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,150 Member
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    Motivational.
  • mysteps2beauty
    mysteps2beauty Posts: 494 Member
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    DianePK wrote: »
    what a great post. I have put down below my answers to some of those points, incase anyone else is interested or it resonates. I am starting over, yet again. I have had several weight loss successes in my life and then life got in the way and I gained the weight back on.

    Relapse
    This particular relapse was slow in the making. I lost 15 kilos (about 30 pounds) before I hit 40 years old as a goal. I felt amazing and skiied my first blue run and was really fit and strong.

    The following year I was still the same weight, but fell badly on the same run and was injured.

    The subsequent surgeries destroyed my confidence and happiness as I became depressed and was in pain constantly. The surgeon kept telling me to "rehab out of it" ."it" turned out to be a screw sitting behind the kneecap - as a result of a botched surgery. I have had 3 additional surgeries, and now have very little cartilage in the joint and am looking down the barrel of a replacement knee.

    Also at the same time my business became more and more stressful, and I also needed spinal surgery to fix a numb arm caused by cervical spondylosis and stenosis and needed a cervical laminectomy to free the nerves to my arm.

    I Went on a weight loss challenge and got under 70kg, but went to Paris and ate myself silly (I don't regret a bite though) and my weight went back up.

    Recently I sold my company and took a full time job, which was very stressful, and the place that I was working was hugely toxic and just awful, and the cupboards directly outside my office stored wholesale sweets/candy (long story) and so I ate sugar for comfort.

    I ended up getting "let go" as I was a "bad fit", despite working 70-80 hours a week and doing all that was asked and more. I was a round peg in a square hole. They gave me one weeks' notice and made me leave immediately, which is just awful for someone in management, as it is not easy to find jobs at this level, and takes time. I'd not done anything wrong, they just didn't want to pay my salary. Again I turned to food, chocolate mainly. I was pretty devastated. So the weight really crept up more, and I stepped on the scales 2 weeks ago heavier than ever.

    That's my relapse story.

    Write Down What Works
    In the past what has worked for me is portion controlled diets such as "Lite'n'Easy" or tracking my food with programs such as weight watchers. I also find that if I do not snack or after dinner, if I refrain from consuming the empty calories of alcohol, if I cut out sugar (processed) and if I do at least 30 minutes of exercise per day, I lose weight at a steady rate. I stay inspired and motivated on Pinterest and use forums like this instead of snacking and drinking wine.

    What DOESN'T work
    If I am too restrictive, such as cutting out all carbs or dairy, I fail. Detox fasting also doesn't work for me as I end up binge eating the wrong foods in reaction. I also have to be careful as I had an eating disorder 20 years ago so I need to be moderate and healthy, focusing on health and fitness. I also have to be careful due to my injuries, not to train too hard so I have to stop altogether.

    What derails you?
    If I drink alcohol my willpower is thrown out the window, and I turn to salty, fatty and or sweet foods, in significant quantities. I prefer not to drink during weight loss efforts as i'd rather lose weight than drink. I also turn to food when I become stressed, so I need to look into alternative methods for dealing with anxiety or solve the reasons for the stress ( for example, I shouldn't have taken that job, as I had a feeling that the owners were crazy from the start but I didn't trust my instincts, so I ended up not in control of my own career - tough lesson). Next job I take I will consider the culture very carefully to ensure I am not walking into a hornets' nest.

    Now I am on the wagon again, looking for a new job, exercising daily, getting my knee looked at by a fresh surgeon's eyes and tracking, using this site, and finding ways to keep this journey integrated, moving in the right direction. I am starting over in my job and in my body. I feel positive and healthier (although once my thighs stop rubbing together I will feel better).

    That's my story of "starting over", if it helps anyone else or resonates, let me know or comment : )

    After all you have gone through, the one thing I would say about it is your resilience and come back. I hope you are doing well since you posted this back January 2015....

    All the best to you.
  • RacheUk82
    RacheUk82 Posts: 70 Member
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    Starting over.... again. This was a much needed welcome - Thank you!
  • Chipsass
    Chipsass Posts: 2 Member
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    Great Great thoughts and concepts…very well-timed and applicable for myself (and I assume others]
  • smartin0181
    smartin0181 Posts: 44 Member
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    I like this. Yes we are all reading this because it pertains to us. I'm on my third attempt at it. I have to remember I am not alone, and it's the journey. And I know a lot more this time then I did last time which means I am set up for success.
  • lulalacroix
    lulalacroix Posts: 1,082 Member
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    Great post.

    When I started again, I thought long and hard about how I had gone wrong in the past. This has helped me to not derail my weight loss goals this time around.

    Also, I get nervous about the new members who are looking for outside motivation. I think if you cannot be self-motivated, then there might be a greater chance of failure.
  • davoiscool
    davoiscool Posts: 125 Member
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    Wise words of experience there. I hoping this phase of weight loss is the one that sticks.
  • Sacha_p
    Sacha_p Posts: 1 Member
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    The most useful thing I've read in such a long time. Thank you.
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,464 Member
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    The mindset of "starting over" is negative and setting yourself up for failure. It creates too much drama for me. This is a lifelong journey. Just keep going. If you get lost on a trip, you don't give up, go home, and start over. You make a few corrections and keep going. Ups and downs are part of the journey and part of LIFE.
  • myheartsabattleground
    myheartsabattleground Posts: 2,040 Member
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    bump !
  • FitToLead
    FitToLead Posts: 275 Member
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    Great post. I get nervous about the new members who are looking for outside motivation. I think if you cannot be self-motivated, then there might be a greater chance of failure.

    I always remember that

    motivation is what we need from the outside to make ourselves do what we don't really want to do.
    Inspiration is what arises from within when we are in touch with what really matters to us.
    So stay inspired.

    When my life gets busy and my eating is off track for days or longer, the moment I register that I am out of touch with what truly inspires me, what truly matters, I refocus on that, and it all gets easier again.
  • FitPhillygirl
    FitPhillygirl Posts: 7,124 Member
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    There is nothing wrong with starting over. Sometimes it's the 2'nd time that is the most successful.
  • Gipcsoul
    Gipcsoul Posts: 12 Member
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    This is just what I needed to read today! Thanks for the great post.
  • Rawrrrforlife
    Rawrrrforlife Posts: 1 Member
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    Such insight and so well written!
  • valpo00
    valpo00 Posts: 3 Member
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    Thank you for this post! Food for thought (nom nom nom) Great read!
  • PantoneRed
    PantoneRed Posts: 40 Member
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    Wonderful and thoughtful post. I will keep coming back to it for motivation and guidance as I re-start my journey...

    Brilliant post!