Feeling unattractive?

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  • jaxass
    jaxass Posts: 2,128 Member
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    I don't think I'm unattractive, but I do think I'm undateable. In other words, I'm not ugly, but I'm not handsome enough to be seen with in public. :smile:
  • km8907
    km8907 Posts: 3,861 Member
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    bearbugbear wrote: »
    km8907 wrote: »
    Was this the same husband that was asexual?

    Yes. We're still together because I love him. We have a family together too. Still, my confidence is shot!

    Yeah I can't imagine. Have you tried marriage counseling? Even if he's asexual, he's not psycho. He could make an effort to make you feel loved.
  • FrothyGibblets
    FrothyGibblets Posts: 49 Member
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    melmelw03 wrote: »
    When you grow up seeing/hearing nothing but criticism by family members....of themselves, you, perfect strangers.....you get real comfortable with the idea that even if you were a supermodel, you'd never be good enough.

    I know that. Taught to feel shame for being overweight by one parent who was caught in that same cycle herself, and litterally told no woman would ever want me repeatedly by the other parent in some incredibly ill thought out attempt at motivating me to change, so I was kind of destined to not have a high opinion of myself lol
  • ValerieMartini2Olives
    ValerieMartini2Olives Posts: 3,024 Member
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    Almost never.
  • jaxass
    jaxass Posts: 2,128 Member
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    FrothyGibblets wrote: »
    melmelw03 wrote: »
    When you grow up seeing/hearing nothing but criticism by family members....of themselves, you, perfect strangers.....you get real comfortable with the idea that even if you were a supermodel, you'd never be good enough.

    I know that. Taught to feel shame for being overweight by one parent who was caught in that same cycle herself, and litterally told no woman would ever want me repeatedly by the other parent in some incredibly ill thought out attempt at motivating me to change, so I was kind of destined to not have a high opinion of myself lol

    People sure do suck sometimes, don't they? Family is suppose to be the one thing you can turn to. Noticed I said "suppose to"? Frustrating at times!
  • selina884
    selina884 Posts: 826 Member
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    There was a time when I hit rock bottom but that's because I was surrounded by idiots who had unrealistic expectations of women. it was my weakness that led me to ruin my self esteem.

    I still have my moments, Im not skinny or perfect but I have a good partner who loves me and always makes me feel great about myself.
  • Pterod
    Pterod Posts: 131 Member
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    I'm so sorry you've experienced something similar, it's an awful situation to be in. Your daughter sounds lucky to have you. I have always been very affectionate with my children and with everyone around me but I guess it has been damaged by the rejection and my low self confidence. I have been making a huge effort to be in photos with my children and keep doing fun, spontaneous and silly things with them since I realised I was so subdued.

    Thanks for the kind words, it's very nice of you to say.
  • DetroitDarin
    DetroitDarin Posts: 955 Member
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    I've never said this to another man, but "Well done, Frothy" :) Good post.
  • Just_J_Now
    Just_J_Now Posts: 9,551 Member
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    Sometimes I do and sometimes I don't.
  • synchkat
    synchkat Posts: 37,368 Member
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    PlaydohPants wrote: »
    synchkat wrote: »
    This thread makes me sad. There's beauty in everyone and everything...ok maybe not a serial killer but I trust there are none posting here.

    Screw the naysayers we are all attractive and worthy and super awesome.

    I'm not a serial killer

    regular killers are beautiful
  • born_of_fire74
    born_of_fire74 Posts: 776 Member
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    I'm cute. Not pretty, sexy or attractive; cute. This is not a terrible thing but there comes an age where "cute" doesn't really work anymore. I'm going to go from cute straight to "old" and I'm not terribly thrilled with this. Luckily I've age fairly well so far and I won't GAF by the time I'm actually old.
  • fanceegirl75
    fanceegirl75 Posts: 620 Member
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    JessicaJS23 wrote: »
    evilokc wrote: »
    I hated myself until i was an adult. Now that im in my 30s i *kitten* love me. You couldnt pay me to be anyone else .It helps that i think im good looking. Im deffinatly not every womans cup of tea but im aging better than 90% of people my age. So now its MY TIME to love me and love being me. Dont waste your time feeling bad. Yes there is ALWAYS someone better looking but so what? For every person you see who is so good looking they make you feel bad about yourself there are 5 that look at you and it makes them feel bad. You dont have to be a perfect 10 to be sexy.


    My mom always told me that her 30's were the best. She said you develop a idgaf attitude and finally feel comfortable in your own skin. I never really thought she made any sense until I hit 30. I finally feel pretty much what she described and it's great. :)

    This. I couldn't agree more!!
  • Kieranova1994
    Kieranova1994 Posts: 258 Member
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    Yes.

    I suffer from social anxiety, dispite how confident I seem on here.

    I feel your pain.
  • saragd012
    saragd012 Posts: 693 Member
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    born_of_fire74 wrote: »
    I'm cute. Not pretty, sexy or attractive; cute. This is not a terrible thing but there comes an age where "cute" doesn't really work anymore. I'm going to go from cute straight to "old" and I'm not terribly thrilled with this. Luckily I've age fairly well so far and I won't GAF by the time I'm actually old.

    I can relate to this. I have never felt particularly pretty, and I'm certainly not "sexy" but I've always been told I am "cute." I honestly try not to focus on it though, I try to be kind to people, and the type of person people want around because I can make them happy, regardless of my physical appearance. I know at some point "cute" will stop being a thing, and my features will not magically become more attractive, so I just focus on being as good of a person as I can.
  • Gimsteinn
    Gimsteinn Posts: 7,678 Member
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    I do.. all the time.. And when people tell me I look beautiful/sexy/pretty I think they're lying to make me feel better.

    So I decided I was gonna be fine with not being beautiful or sexy or pretty, Cause i'm gonna be bloody strong instead and now I am kinda strong although there's always room for improvement.
    I find that working out makes me feel better about myself, I find self confidence in being fit
  • refuseresist
    refuseresist Posts: 934 Member
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    PlaydohPants wrote: »
    synchkat wrote: »
    This thread makes me sad. There's beauty in everyone and everything...ok maybe not a serial killer but I trust there are none posting here.

    Screw the naysayers we are all attractive and worthy and super awesome.

    I'm not a serial killer

    multiple murderer...get it right

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