going to uni

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  • AnvilHead
    AnvilHead Posts: 18,344 Member
    edited September 2016
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    callumwalker1995 wrote: »
    yeah i agree with everything here its just i want to make friends and be more social as i was isolated and on my own the whole of last year but i still want to go to the gym in the mornings and study hard

    Bottom line is, you're a big boy now and it's time to take charge of your life and start making your own decisions. If you want to work out four days a week, figure out how to make time to do it. If you can't make time to do it, cut your workouts down to fit your schedule. If drinking takes a higher priority than working out, that's a decision you've made - accept that and roll with it or change it. If you have to work to pay the bills or study to pass your classes, maybe that will take priority for a while or maybe you'll learn how to organize your time well enough to fit your workouts in. The bottom line is that nobody else can make those decisions or write your schedule for you - you're an adult so it's time to start adulting.
  • peleroja
    peleroja Posts: 3,979 Member
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    I would like to point out that the friends you make going out drinking constantly....are the kind of friends who like to go out drinking constantly. Which is fine if that's what you want to do, but if you don't, you'd probably be better off meeting people who do the same things as you.

    If you want to spend your time at the gym and library, then the gym and library are probably great places for you to make friends, know what I mean? The good thing about university is that there are so many different people with different interests that it's never hard to find someone who's into the same stuff as you. Way easier than virtually any other point in your adult life in my opinion.
  • callumwalker1995
    callumwalker1995 Posts: 389 Member
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    peleroja wrote: »
    I would like to point out that the friends you make going out drinking constantly....are the kind of friends who like to go out drinking constantly. Which is fine if that's what you want to do, but if you don't, you'd probably be better off meeting people who do the same things as you.

    If you want to spend your time at the gym and library, then the gym and library are probably great places for you to make friends, know what I mean? The good thing about university is that there are so many different people with different interests that it's never hard to find someone who's into the same stuff as you. Way easier than virtually any other point in your adult life in my opinion.

    yeah but who strikes a conversation and gets to know someone well in the gym or the library (where you get chucked out if you even so much as cough), drinking imo is the only place where people can actually show their full personality
  • janejellyroll
    janejellyroll Posts: 25,763 Member
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    callumwalker1995 wrote: »
    peleroja wrote: »
    I would like to point out that the friends you make going out drinking constantly....are the kind of friends who like to go out drinking constantly. Which is fine if that's what you want to do, but if you don't, you'd probably be better off meeting people who do the same things as you.

    If you want to spend your time at the gym and library, then the gym and library are probably great places for you to make friends, know what I mean? The good thing about university is that there are so many different people with different interests that it's never hard to find someone who's into the same stuff as you. Way easier than virtually any other point in your adult life in my opinion.

    yeah but who strikes a conversation and gets to know someone well in the gym or the library (where you get chucked out if you even so much as cough), drinking imo is the only place where people can actually show their full personality

    People can show their full personalities everywhere. To think that people are only capable of this when drinking . . . well, that's just not true. I've shown my full personality in bars, for sure. But I've also show it in the gym, at the library, at work, in my living room, etc.
  • elphie754
    elphie754 Posts: 7,574 Member
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    If it's just the alcohol portion that you are concerned with, you can always go out with friends and order non-alcoholic drinks.
  • Rabbitsocksgardener
    Rabbitsocksgardener Posts: 74 Member
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    Honestly though people have no problem boozing and working out! You'll absolutely find time for both, and it's all about working to find the balance that makes you feel best! You'll also find that you can find gym buds with similar goals and concerns that can keep you accountable and even drag your hungover *kitten* out of bed and into the gym!
  • callumwalker1995
    callumwalker1995 Posts: 389 Member
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    I'm going out sunday and then Wednesday, do you think this is ok? shall I track these days as normal and leave some cals for drinks (about 600?) or just eat normal and have drinks as extra and just enjoy them instead of tracking them
  • elphie754
    elphie754 Posts: 7,574 Member
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    You are still over thinking this.
  • jo_nz
    jo_nz Posts: 548 Member
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    You'll soon figure out what works for you.

    If you want to party constantly, no doubt you can find someone to join you - probably not the same people every night, but depending on their own timetables, you can usually find someone with a late start tomorrow who is ready to cut loose tonight.

    But you can still have fun without that, and you will find plenty of other ways to socialise - I found the gym actually quite a good place to make friends at uni, or just in classes & labs. Then you take lunch breaks together afterwards and chat some more, or moan about professors and assignments - no alcohol needed. I don't think that drinking-me is more me than regular-me. In fact probably the other way around, but I'll admit it can be a good way to break the ice (once it's broken though, there's really no need to keep on going).

    When I was at uni, I kept an eye out for local bands playing (some bars had regular live music), comedy nights and other events - I found them better for actually interacting with people and making friendships.
  • MeiannaLee
    MeiannaLee Posts: 338 Member
    edited September 2016
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    I was taking 16 credits, am part of student counsil, have friends, would wake up at 4am to workout, i counted calories, etc.

    I ended up relapsing into my eating disorder, and i had a mental breakdown that led to at home care for a while.

    PLEASE be careful. I am sorry but you cannot have it all without lagging in one area of your life.
    Choose what is important to you.

    You can party now and get it out of your system, and then jr year you can get your poop together.
    Or you can understand whats really important and know that real friends are not just drinking buddies but people who you enjoy time alone with and who have your back


    //if your going to drink at least opt for low cal vodka and tequila
  • SusanMFindlay
    SusanMFindlay Posts: 1,804 Member
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    There are piles of ways to make friends at university. Choose whatever appeals/works for you.
    1. Live on campus. You'll meet your roommates, neighbours, etc.
    2. Join a club. There are tons of them. Usually one for every major plus ones surrounding hobbies. Join the one for your major. They're not for studying; they're to socialize the people who'll be in your classes for the next four years.
    3. Sign up for an intramural sport. You'll meet your teammates.
    4. Join an athletic team (if you're good enough at a particular sport). In my experience (living next door to the swim team), many athletes drink and party more than most other students.
    5. Take one or more courses with a lab or tutorial (or just a small enrollment). You'll meet your class mates, lab partner, etc.
    6. Take part in organized social events. Some of these will involve alcohol. There's nothing wrong with the occasional night out. But most students go out 1-3 nights a week - not 7.
    7. Go wherever interests you and meet random people (gym, library, bar, cafeteria, grocery store) or strike up a conversation with someone while waiting in line/hanging out between classes/waiting for class to start/etc.
  • callumwalker1995
    callumwalker1995 Posts: 389 Member
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    I am going into my final year so i'm just worried that socialising would get in the way of my work that is essential for getting me that degree that I want.
  • dizzieblondeuk
    dizzieblondeuk Posts: 286 Member
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    callumwalker1995 wrote: »
    I am going into my final year so i'm just worried that socialising would get in the way of my work that is essential for getting me that degree that I want.
    This is such a sad statement! Will socialising get it the way of your work, when you GET a job? The idea that 'once I have a degree and job, I can socialise' is a pretty unhealthy way. This is your life, right now, it'll be your life in a year's time, when you've graduated. Don't make it into some brand new you that will magically exist once you have a degree certificate.

    There will still be time within that for socialising within a heavy course load. One easy way to combine both is to join a uni sports team, or find one of the recreational clubs. As a fresher, you'll discover that these clubs cleverly combine a bit of sport with a whole lot of socialising and bonding! So, you'll get your exercise quota and a social life at the same time.

    If you're still worried about fitting exercise in, consider walking to your classes. I lived 3 miles from my lecture halls in the first 2 years, and walked home around 3 days a week. There will also likely be gym classes for students at the on-campus gym, if that's something you want - also good places to make friends and socialise.
  • elphie754
    elphie754 Posts: 7,574 Member
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    callumwalker1995 wrote: »
    I am going into my final year so i'm just worried that socialising would get in the way of my work that is essential for getting me that degree that I want.

    Wait... At the beginning you said this was your freshman year and now it is you final year?!?
  • smotheredincheese
    smotheredincheese Posts: 559 Member
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    callumwalker1995 wrote: »
    I am going into my final year so i'm just worried that socialising would get in the way of my work that is essential for getting me that degree that I want.

    If it's your final year then tbh I don't think going out drinking every night of freshers week is the way to make friends. Most people tend to stick together with the people they share halls of residence with to begin with, and it may be harder for you as on older student to break the ice.
    Why not join a few societies and meet people you can talk to, sober, who have similar interests?
  • claraoswold
    claraoswold Posts: 89 Member
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    I have a two hour break between classes most days when I go to the gym. On Thursdays I have a five hour break so I go at least three or four times a week. And I can still do things after class. Class usually ends around 3:20 so yeah, lots of time.

    The biggest issue I've seen with universities is that the meal plans and options are not great. I bring my own stuff, so this isn't an issue most days.

    As for drinking, don't be stupid. Do so occasionally if you want. I have a rule that I don't drink if I have to be in class the next day. It works for me.
  • callumwalker1995
    callumwalker1995 Posts: 389 Member
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    I'm in my final year but I'm staying in halls of residence with other final year students and don't you think its a bit late to join a society? :( I also like going to the gym in the morning like 8 am which I obviously wouldn't be able to do if I went out the night bfore
  • emmadonaldson95
    emmadonaldson95 Posts: 179 Member
    edited September 2016
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    As someone in the middle of a 5/6 year degree I'd say be prepared to compromise. I've been back at uni 2 weeks and official freshers week is next week for us. I've been doing well so far getting to the gym 2-3 times per week which is my personal aim. I'm well aware that come freshers week it's best to just go with the flow and have fun. I'd say for you as a 1st year that's even more important as you need to make friends and not be that boring bloke who's too busy talking about protein synthesis to be fun ;)
    It's one week of hard party so just go with it and get back on the gym/healthy eating wagon once freshers is finished, classes kick in and you'll find everyone settles into a routine. Once freshers is finished you can easily go out once a week or once every couple weeks without attracting any attention as the dull one and without sacrificing the gym life.
  • emmadonaldson95
    emmadonaldson95 Posts: 179 Member
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    callumwalker1995 wrote: »
    I'm going out sunday and then Wednesday, do you think this is ok? shall I track these days as normal and leave some cals for drinks (about 600?) or just eat normal and have drinks as extra and just enjoy them instead of tracking them

    Personally i like to track mine. I also wear my fitbit equivilant because youll be shocked how much cardio you do and how many calories it burns dancing about, which helps offset the drink. I usually try to pick something for pre drinks like wine which for the alcohol content isnt too horrific or vodka or gin and only use diet mixers. If i drink in clubs which i try to avoid i always drink vodka and diet coke. I feel like i cheated the day if i dont track them but that might just be me
  • RachelElser
    RachelElser Posts: 427 Member
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    I did not drink a lot in college because 1- price! and 2- I didn't need booze to have a good time. Nothing against going to a party but if you get pass put drunk on a weekly basis you may not be invited back the next semester.
    You can join clubs, study groups, gym groups (zumba, yoga for ex) to meet people.

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