Compulsive Eater needing help...
hgrace78
Posts: 23 Member
Hi. I'm a compulsive eater. I've never actually put that out in the universe... Feels really strange. But here I am. The jig is up. I'm ok until about 8 pm and then I find myself eating constantly. I can't stop. I'm not hungry but I'm like a bottomless pit, unable to feel fulfilled. I try and control it, but then it just consumes my mind. Yes, I realize this is an addiction. Yes, I should probably be researching shrinks rather than crafting this post... But I'm just wondering if any of you have had this issue and beat it?
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Replies
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What are you eating after 8p that does not satisfy you? Maybe you are missing something?? Try eating more protein. Boiled egg or beef jerky. See if that fills you up?1
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It's not really what I'm eating because it doesn't really matter. It's a compulsion, so as soon as I finish one thing, I'm thinking about the next.1
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I struggle with this too. I found the book 'If Not Dieting Then What' really useful in stepping back from the moment and figuring out what's actually happening, being able to articulate what you're thinking and interrupt it.
Go well, good luck! x4 -
I seem to have an addiction/compulsive disorder. It's kind of weird though, because since being on this site, my addiction/compulsion is logging my food and making sure I have all my steps in for the day. My addiction to food is very multi-faceted, but part of it is "tasting" food. Sometimes I get stuck on one flavor, like teriyaki or vanilla and I can't get enough no matter how full I feel, but sometimes it's not specific, it's a need to keep tasting something. Sometimes that compulsion will strike while I'm eating something and suddenly I feel this ravenous feeling like I have got to stuff myself as quickly as I can to satisfy this craving that is driving me crazy. I've always wondered if I'm the only person in the world that has these crazy feelings or if others do too and no one talks about it????4
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Hgrace78, you are very much not alone. I do this too, and it's got so bad lately that I find myself here on the Community boards for the first time to try to find inspiration to stop it. I know why I do it - it's a mixture of general anxiety and self-punishment (I have learned over the years that I punish myself with food when I don't even want it - it's a harmful measure to temporarily alleviate angst or whatever emotion it is I'm having, mixed with subconsciously thinking I don't deserve to treat myself any better). It's not usually due to hunger, but if it is then that is often due to undereating beforehand, or being hungover. The best way to tackle it in my experience is exactly what you've done - call it out, say it out loud to yourself or to someone else - even when you're at the fridge, if you can say 'I'm about to eat this and I don't need or want it. Why am I going to eat it? Am I going to have it? What's making me want it?' and decide then if you're going to have it or not. Even if you then do, just recognising what you're doing is helpful - being mindful of it is the first step, as self-awareness does wonders for helping you stop. And, if you do then eat it anyway, don't berate yourself. Eat it, enjoy it, and then start afresh the next day or even the next hour - rather than the old 'Well, I've had it now, I've ruined it, I might as well just eat everything else in the house and in the next house too'. Other things I find helpful are having a sweet hot drink instead, like Options or something - sometimes that gets rid of the need to shovel solids in. Or, cleaning your teeth. I sometimes find that once I've taken my makeup off and cleaned my teeth, my brain goes into nighttime mode and I don't feel like eating anymore. I hope this helps and I wish you not just luck, but awareness and determination!7
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I am a binge eater. Usually at the end of the day as well. I can literally eat several thousand calories without even being hungry. As soon as I stray even a little from my healthy eating plan it's a roller coaster of bad eating until I finally go to sleep. I would love a support group for this!!7
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sounds blunt but I just stopped. after a while of forcing myself not to, I stopped needing to do it. it's very much a habit - if I start snacking at night I start feeling the need to again even if I'm not hungry, so I try to avoid it unless I know I really didn't eat enough that day; if that's the case it's something I need, not oreos.5
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I think I am too, but in the day. I wish I could help but I don't know how to stop it0
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I have the same problem, At about 8-9 when ever the kids get to bed im like ravenous. not even hungry just eating. if i have had a bad day, or if i have had a good day. once i can finally relax its like i should have been a competitive eater or something.3
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I've been sabotaging my workout efforts for over a month now with binge eating. I'm getting in touch with a nutritionist because I hate myself for it, which causes another episode, which makes me spiral into a hate/binge/hate/binge cycle. If anyone finds any leads on a support group for this, please let me know. I've tried to "just stop" and it's not that simple. I feel powerless. I'd love a positive support group!3
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sounds blunt but I just stopped. after a while of forcing myself not to, I stopped needing to do it. it's very much a habit - if I start snacking at night I start feeling the need to again even if I'm not hungry, so I try to avoid it unless I know I really didn't eat enough that day; if that's the case it's something I need, not oreos.
Great for you! It may be a little more difficult for others.1 -
I have this same problem I eat to console or comfort myself sometimes when I'm really stressed out and last night was one of those nights well actually all afternoon yesterday too it's like I either do really good or really bad there's no cheat meal because when I start it lasts all day and sometimes into the next day too0
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leejoyce31 wrote: »sounds blunt but I just stopped. after a while of forcing myself not to, I stopped needing to do it. it's very much a habit - if I start snacking at night I start feeling the need to again even if I'm not hungry, so I try to avoid it unless I know I really didn't eat enough that day; if that's the case it's something I need, not oreos.
Great for you! It may be a little more difficult for others.
I didn't say it was easy.0 -
Thanks for the replies, everyone! It's very heartening to know there are others like me on here. I do have generalized anxiety disorder and I think I use the taste of food as a distraction. It's something to concentrate on instead of whatever is freaking me out. A maladaptive coping mechanism. And I've been through all kinds of therapy to treat my anxiety. I've learned mindfulness, meditation, anything you can imagine, I've been there. But, I'm too arrogant to let it work.. I think I'm smarter than all that. I mean... I put myself through hell working out and then completely sabotage it with thousands and thousands of calories that night. I'm so brilliant! And I can only imagine the damage I'm doing to my organs (heart, liver, etc). But no matter how much I tell myself this, I still do it. I can only liken it to a drug addiction of some kind.3
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I have the same problem. Often I do feel full after a while but that doesn't register as "so you can stop eating now" in my head. Today while I was doing the dishes I kept eating the entire time (sweets, mostly. I try to be good and go with "saying "no" once in the supermarket is easier than saying "no" one chocolate at a time", but somehow you ALWAYS end up with stuff to eat in your pantry. Even if it's just spoons full of honey and linseed. I do get "creative" during binges.) I didn't do this as much for a while when I started using this website and lost a lot of weight and was motivated, but now I'm trying to maintain and don't have a goal to keep me on track it's getting worse again, the binges getting quite regular and counting calories starts to feel pointless. But I'm already starting to gain again. And also worry about the psychological side of things. I am obsessed with food and think about calories and nutrition all the effing time, when am I allowed to eat again and what and how much... but lately I feel sort-of confused right now and unsure about how many is the right amount and how to fill them properly and what is healthy for me and what not - I'm scared of gaining weight again.... but these binges and my general loss of direction is making it even more difficult to stop myself during binges!1
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It is such a mind game. For me, it's an addiction almost impossible to escape because you have to have food to survive, so you can't remove the food from your life, so it is just a constant struggle. I feel like mine has to do with something in my brain because mood, stress, time of day, none of that is what drives this addiction. Every other aspect of my life is controlled & normal, except for this, never feeling full always feeling like I'm starving and perpetually being on a diet, and always thinking about it. It's a lifelong struggle, I've been thin, I am now super fat, and have been everywhere else in between. I've tried it all, exercising, weight watchers, nurtisystem, a nutritionist, 21 day fix, P90X, kickboxing, no carbs, cabbage diet, but nothing really helped me lose substantial weight no matter how strict I was with it, so then I fall back into this struggle. The only thing that worked was several years ago I took a diet pill that had undeclared sibutramine in it, which was a weightloss Rx years ago but got pulled from the market. I lost 40lbs. This pill instantly turned off that need & feeling to constantly eat or always feeling hungry, but it got pulled off the market. Since then I've gained over 65lbs back. I need to find a permanent solution, I've wasted so much time and worry on this food addiction & weight gain.1
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I'm struggling with the very same thing. I know it's an addiction. It's become my way of dealing with emotions. I know 'how to' eat right. But I just can't. The worse I eat, the more self-critical I become which causes more anxiety/depression and I eat to calm or numb the feelings. I found a more compassionate approach here https://growinghumankindness.com that I've started to adopt. I try to be more patient with myself and realize my overeating stems from an emotional need and that to change the way I eat I need to heal my relationship with food first. I also found the book "Weakness is not a Sin" helpful as well as listening to podcasts about using the 12 Steps from Overeaters Anonymous https://oa.org/newcomers/how-do-i-start/program-basics/twelve-steps/ I haven't join this group yet figuring I could do the program on my own. But I keep relapsing and am starting to see I need some sort of support group. However these resources have been very helpful for me. I've also found it helpful to get up early and walk/ exercise first thing and then to go to bed early in the evening. I'm less likely to give in in the morning than when I'm tired in the evening. I hope this helps. I appreciate everyones' thoughts. It's nice to know I'm not alone.3
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Cutaway_Collar wrote: »Lady, you may have clinical depression.3
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For weeks and weeks I'd go upto bed taking item after item, the more I ate the more I wanted, I wasn't even hungry. One day I literally said to myself, you can't keep doing this, your slowly killing yourself. Now I just simply don't do it anymore, I have written myself signs too which definitely help and make me think twice if I'm thinking of going off track. A lot of it is habit and a cycle you need to break and the other is will power, and being able to say no when everything around you is saying yes
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Anyone struggling with this may want to try intermittent fasting. I'm not saying this will absolutely work but it's worth trying something new. It has DRASTICALLY helped me with my compulsion to eat at night time.1
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b1gwillystyle wrote: »Anyone struggling with this may want to try intermittent fasting. I'm not saying this will absolutely work but it's worth trying something new. It has DRASTICALLY helped me with my compulsion to eat at night time.
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I aet end of evening, too.what works for me in sa relaxing medutation i liste to in my ipod or telepnhoe; Lots of possibilities to find at youtube. select one thatpleases you and start it the moment you have finished diner. For exemple
https://youtu.be/OL_6avXpwzA?t=18
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I was exactly like this for the same reasons you listed. I had to force myself to stop once my calories were gone and I had my bf help me. At first it was so bad I would just decide to go to bed because it was the only thing that would stop me from thinking about food. Like any addiction you kind of have to put yourself into detox and go through withdrawals. You could also leave some calories left at the end of your day and binge on really low calorie foods or make a smoothie (I am slow at drinking smoothies so I can't usually even finish them before bed. You just have to train your body as part of your journey.1
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@Arizona_C I listened to that meditation and it was a WONDERFUL. Thank you for posting it! I will use this now when I need it. Thanks, Holly0
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A few strategies have helped me. The compulsion is satisfying a need. Identify that first. Make sure that need is taken care of. Then you can focus on satisfying that need in non food ways.
There is also the habitual component so you will need to be alert on days you are tired or distracted that you don't slip back in to old habits.
Evening compulsion brings to mind a couple of factors. You might be bored. Willpower from a day of restraint might be depleted.
A psychologist pointed out to my group therapy class that it is just as exhausting to hang on to an anxiety as it is to confront the fear. So avoidance just compounds the problem. Confront the fear, find release.
Food replacements might be exercise, handcrafts like knitting, a hot bubble bath, a new club or workshop, or a good book.
New rules like eat only in the kitchen or only one cup of the designated snack followed by a full glass of water might help.
Try something and if it works, keep doing it. If not, try something else.1 -
@Arizona_C, I listened to the meditation and it is amazing! Thank you! @b1gwillystyle, I read up on intermittent fasting and I'm starting today.my first calories were taken in at 1 pm and my last was at 8 pm. So, hopefully this, coupled with meditation exercises and some kind of hand craft to keep my mind occupied, will work. Fingers crossed. Thank you all for you generous and inspiring advice!1
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I'm curious to know how it works for you. Keep me posted. IF has been amazing for me.0
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Struggle with the same thing here0
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@hgrace78 - just sent you a message about this post. I hope you are doing well. Binge eating is so hard, especially when you can't get full.....I understand completely.0
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I get like that too. I will do it for a while, then kick myself and stop, be "good" for a while, then fall back into it. I've just kicked myself again today to stop doing that for this week!
I don't have any specific strategy to deal with it - I just have to exercise self control and after about the 3rd day it becomes easier. BUt it's bloody hard!!! And I start looking around for stuff to eat so I have to distract myself by going and doing something even if it's playing Candy Crush! Or I'll go take a looooong shower.
Tonight I am going to fold and put away all the laundry I left lying around on purpose!!!
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