ATTN Parents! I need some advice...

i have 4 kids ( 2 boys 2 girls) my oldest is 21 my youngest 9
they ALL do it,
im not sure HOW to stop it
all i do is KEEPING CHECKING on them
and reminding

I beat my kids

I never let my 5 year old play outside of my attention. There isn't a moment that I can't see or hear what she is up to, that goes for double when she has friends over. Children like to explore and it's up to YOU to make sure they stay safe and not do what they are not supposed to.

Amen!

If it's a problem, quit letting him play with these kids. It time to teach him about respect - not only of other people but of his things. And if other kids can't be respectful, why be around them?

I am a mother of 3 and I hate to tell you this, but this will be an ongoing worry for you and your child. Your children will be faced everyday with other children who are not taught the same values or morals as yours. The important thing is to teach your child to know what is right or wrong and empower them to stand up for themselves to their friends so they don't get into trouble. It is so important to teach them this and continue to do so. As they grow up and are faced with even more difficult peer pressure's they have to learn to stand up for what is right and doing the right thing. They also need to understand consequences. This takes a long time and in fact, children do not fully understand consequences until they become young adults. Hang in there, we all face this and must teach our children about choosing the right friends and right choices. Since he is little you will have to do this for him sometimes, but when you teach him why and how, he will need to learn to do this on his own. You set the example and foundation.

I don't tolerate my own kids doing what they know they're not supposed to do, and there's no way I would tolerate someone else's kid doing it at my house....I think you're on the right track, keep punishing, keep on him. At that age even though they know it is wrong, they have totally developed their impulse control, so you have to take into consideration their age..... if it comes down to it, you could have a friendly chat with the parents, "my son loves it when your child comes over, but we have a couple rules different from at your house, maybe we could go over them for next time he visits?" theres no reason that because they don't care if their kids tear apart expensive toys that you should be expected to shrug it off as well. I teach my kids to respect their toys, clothes, furniture, etc......

Here is my favorite saying, "My house, My rules." I make sure my kids know that I don't care what other kids are allowed to do, or where they are allowed to do it at. This goes for the kids that visit my home too, their momma might let them do things at home but that stuff doesn't fly around here.

I would suggest structured play until they are older and can be trusted to obey the house rules. Have them over to play a certain game, or have specific toys available only. I would also set a time limit, things tend to fizzle, always leave them wanting more so they will be excited to play again next time.

I can see taking away things for destruction of his truck. The garden hose thing is normal though. kids like to play in water. I know I always did. Playing with the hose is part of being a kid. maybe they were thirsty, we were always drinking from the hose as kids.

My son doesn't have any neighborhood friends but I do know that some kids are not disciplined at home and have no boundaries. I see it all the time at stores and in the kids in my neighborhood. One morning this little boy and his sister were playing in a car on the road, no parents ANYWHERE and the little girl was completely naked. We had to call the police because we didn't know who the kids belonged to. (we live across from a bunch of apartments). The kids were honking the horn on the car and running around in the street. The little girl was maybe 2 and the boy was maybe 4.

My son did have a playdate at our house with a little boy from swim class last summer. He has a Knex Ferris wheel that he and my husband put together and the boy took it off of the dresser in my sons room and took some of the pieces apart and lost them. then he brought it out to our living room and his mom yelled at him for breaking my son's toy. I only payed 5 bucks for the thing, but my son was upset because he loves Ferris wheels and he didn't want his friend touching his toy that he put together with his dad. My son is 7 and has autism. he is very much by the book and does not like it when people do what they are not supposed to be doing. He will also let you know you aren't supposed to be doing something.

If I were in this situation, I would make sure to monitor the childrens' play more. If there are items you don't want them playing with, then either remove them from their play area or let them know they are off limits. If the neighbor boy doesn't have parents who set boundaries, he really may not know what is appropriate and inappropriate behavior. If you set the limits and boundaries of playing at your house and he still cannot seem to follow them, then it may be time to end the play-date relationship!

I would go and talk to the parents of the other kids, and let them know what is going on. In my neighborhood there isn't a parent around here, that wouldn't hesitate going to someone's house to let the parent's know what has been said or done. Let them know what's going on...I can almost guarantee that if things were reversed, they would be knocking on your door!!

oh and i also recite "the list"

for example
before the last boy sleepover
the list was
dotn touch the oven
dont touch the microwave
dont touch the laptops dont order pay per view movies
AFTER the sleepover I now have to add
"dont draw on people after they fall asleep"
its an ongoing problem LOL