Hoarders

tonicia
tonicia Posts: 145 Member
edited September 29 in Chit-Chat
Not weight loss related but.....has anybody lived with a hoarder?
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Replies

  • mikonei
    mikonei Posts: 291 Member
    I live with one now. Not the best of situations to be in.
  • dumb_blondes_rock
    dumb_blondes_rock Posts: 1,568 Member
    I tend to hoard hair products/beauty products.....but i am not hardcore.....i LOVE the hoarder shows though....
  • pauljsolie
    pauljsolie Posts: 1,024 Member
    Yes, growing up.
  • shesnotthere
    shesnotthere Posts: 117
    No, and the tv show sends me into cleaning fits.
  • enidstewart
    enidstewart Posts: 9
    My neighbor is a hoarder. it is awful. Totally wipes out your profit margin if selling a house.
  • MissingMyOldSelf
    MissingMyOldSelf Posts: 689 Member
    No, and the tv show sends me into cleaning fits.

    Me too!!!! I will clean for days afterwards, and get rid of clothes to the Special Olympics!!

    I think my husband's glad I only catch the show maybe once a month :)
  • cynthiaclark1000
    cynthiaclark1000 Posts: 77 Member
    Agreed!I feel dirty just watching them....:happy:
  • boomboom011
    boomboom011 Posts: 1,459
    no and i cant fathom what that must be like. I have a tendency to throw too much stuff away. Clutter gives me anxiety
  • Kath712
    Kath712 Posts: 1,263 Member
    No, and the tv show sends me into cleaning fits.

    Me too! It's actually really good for me to watch once in a while. Inspires me to clean up.
  • sarahbeth17
    sarahbeth17 Posts: 100 Member
    I somewhat am....NOTHING like the show but I have most my stuff from childhood that I can't part with, although I've been getting a lot better and donating things more often! We own a lot of furniture and don't have much space so it probably looks worse than it would if we were in a big enough house!
  • vaughny
    vaughny Posts: 145
    my grandma is a horder and she used to babysit me when i was a kid GROSS!
  • Leannek74
    Leannek74 Posts: 374 Member
    Yep, my old room mate (her house) and still current good friend. It was before the shows came on and I didn't realize how common the disease is.
  • joeysrib
    joeysrib Posts: 158 Member
    No, but my moms neighbor died about a year ago, I think her daughter has become a hoarder, she hasn't't cleaned anything out of the house, but she brings over a car load of crap everyday. Place looks ridiculous now.
  • tonicia
    tonicia Posts: 145 Member
    I guess I should ask....has anybody had success in "curing" it? My mom is a closet hoarder. The living room and things are clean, but we have sheds in the backyard/guest rooms/etc FULL of stuff....It's extremely taxing. I've tried to help sooooooooo many times and the only solution I see really working is moving out. = ( Anybody have any ideas?
  • kellydoyle76
    kellydoyle76 Posts: 14
    No, and the tv show sends me into cleaning fits.

    Me too!!!! I will clean for days afterwards, and get rid of clothes to the Special Olympics!!

    I think my husband's glad I only catch the show maybe once a month :)

    Me too!
  • LilRedRooster
    LilRedRooster Posts: 1,421 Member
    Growing up, my best friends' family. They hoarded EVERYTHING, and the entire house was ridiculous. Lots of fun when you're a kid, though.
  • vaughny
    vaughny Posts: 145
    i think they need a therapist to help them, everytime i see an epidsode the families usually say they have cleaned in the past and it always goes back they seem to have better success working with a therapist. My mom cleaned my grandma's house and its slowly going back to the way it was, i don't know why she is a hoarder
  • Kara52217
    Kara52217 Posts: 353 Member
    No, and the tv show sends me into cleaning fits.

    Me too.. Watched old episodes in On Demand this weekend and been cleaning ever since!
  • Kym1610
    Kym1610 Posts: 328 Member
    Yep, my hubby is a hoarder. He has uni books from 20 years ago that he won't through away (and no he is not going back to uni and he admits that the info in some of them is out of date). He also has mobile phone broachers (prices etc) from every major phone company for the last 10 years, he has clothes that he doesn't wear anymore some which are either the same age or older than me.... I could go on but you get the idea!
  • cheeksv
    cheeksv Posts: 521 Member
    I think my mom is heading that way. When we were young the house was clean now her home is in shambles and she keeps starting projects and not finishing them and is so unorganized. I tend to keep things because I do not have time to throw them away or go through the boxes but I have no problem getting rid of anything haha

    Watching the show has made it easier to organize myself haha
  • mikonei
    mikonei Posts: 291 Member
    Outside of professional help, there isn't much to be done. Just don't push her. That only seems to make things worse. If anything, talk to her, try and get her to see what is really important. It is not at all a quick fix situation. After 3 years the woman I live with was finally convinced that her pool ( ripped liner, broken deck, rusty sides) should be taken down.. And we only managed to get that far by telling her that we would fix the deck and find a free pool on craigslist.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,416 Member
    I guess I should ask....has anybody had success in "curing" it? My mom is a closet hoarder. The living room and things are clean, but we have sheds in the backyard/guest rooms/etc FULL of stuff....It's extremely taxing. I've tried to help sooooooooo many times and the only solution I see really working is moving out. = ( Anybody have any ideas?

    There are usually other psychological issues, and you aren't going to be able to "fix" it yourself.

    Go to WebMD or Mayo Clinic and search for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. It will lead you to other disorders as well. Often there are co-issues like anxiety, depression, ADD. The hoarders need therapeutic help. It isn't just about cleaning.
  • smrtcar
    smrtcar Posts: 104 Member
    There is nothing YOU can do and there is NO cure. My mom is a hoarder and I cannot visit for more than 10-15 minutes. I can't sit anywhere in her place either. I've tried numerous times but have given up helping.
  • slwsnowman40
    slwsnowman40 Posts: 4
    No, and the tv show sends me into cleaning fits.

    OMG, I so happy I'm not the only one! When my wife and I watch, we just start cleaning and putting little things away. We aren't picture perfect all the time (I have an 8-, 6-year old and a 20 month old; all boys) but we are never any where near one of those shows. We are a controlled chaos; though I will loose it and start cleaning, and we both agree she doesn't like when I clean as it involves lots of trash bags and her not being able to find anything.
  • tonicia
    tonicia Posts: 145 Member
    So....I agree it is gross....I do feel dirty....
    The show makes me cry out of frustration every time.
    I know it's psychological issues deeper than cleaning.
    She has almost every "cause" I've found that people start hoarding.
    I get why she does it, but unfortunately it doesn't help me feel less frustrated/closed in on/etc. (Some of you know how I feel).
    I have suggested therapy/tried to help her clean/written her letters/cried to her/had heart to hearts/etc etc etc a thousand times.
    She refuses to even discuss it..she just gets angry and walks away..even if I stay calm. I word things in ways that aren't blaming. She doesn't want me to move out....I've told her I would.....nothing has helped.....her marriage and relationship with me and others have suffered. If I could afford to move out, I would've already. Im just stuck and don't know what to do now..if she won't accept help with the disorder or the cleaning. = (
  • vaughny
    vaughny Posts: 145
    i am sorry i somewhat understand b/c i had to spend a lot of time at my grandma's I can't hardly visit her now b/c she has cockroaches and I hate them I also have to make sure i can visit her when i have no other plans b/c i feel like her house smells and I don't want to go any where smelling like that also i have to make sure i don't take anything in with me like a purse or jacket for fear of a cockroach going home with me. When i was little at least she didn't have bugs occaisonaly maggots outside in her trash (i gag if i see maggots even on tv). I hope your situation gets better
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,416 Member
    I feel for you, I really do. I had an uncle who was a hoarder, and right now I'm in a condo and my downstairs neighbor is a hoarder.

    I've found in my area that Adult Protective Services can step in. I contacted the City because the smell from my downstairs neighbor's apt is so bad and I'm worried about health issues for the rest of us.

    You can contact your city or county Health Department, Social Services, the police or Sherriff. They can all help you. You need to take care of your health.

    Move out. That is the best thing for you. Talk to Social Services, describe your problem and ask for help. You can find roommates to share expenses. You can move out, and you will be much happier.
  • aprilgicker
    aprilgicker Posts: 395 Member
    It can be bad. Folks have to want to change. Even on the show, a women who had her children taken from her still couldn't deal with throwing away a slushy cup. To me she chose the cup over her kids. The best way to help that I have seen is to not be combative. Just make a statement about a decision they have made and leave it at that.
    Like when the lady had to keep the cup. someone should have simply said. "So this cup means more to you than your kids." make it a statement not a question. don't cry, don't yell, don't threaten. Just DO
    And you need to move out. save you money. do not pay for things that you don't need. cut your bills down get 2 jobs. then when you are ready a few years down the road you will need to call the appropriate people that your Mom has a hoarding issue and her house is not safe. it won't be long and she will have the rest of the house filled soon after you leave.

    Wish you luck
  • ziggiezed
    ziggiezed Posts: 36
    I have a friend thats a hoarder & it's really terrible i have been trying to help them get their place together as a friend, They refuse to allow me to help them get a cleaning crew. I really want to give up helping them. they have a really nice house & every time i go to help them clean we clean the exact same area i cleaned before. I feel like it is worthless work & to make things worse their pregnant. They have way to many animals to have kids and a newborn baby.

    4 dogs, 4 cats, 3 chinchillas, 3 hamsters. The animals are really not house broken because they go crap anywhere in the house, I am concerned & wonder, what should i do? I would love to throw my hands up and walk away but what kind of friend would i be to do that.
  • Cait_Sidhe
    Cait_Sidhe Posts: 3,150 Member
    I live with one now. Not the best of situations to be in.
    Me too. I keep my own room nice and mostly clutter free. But it's become so bad I can't use the rest of the house. And this person is in complete denial that it's a problem.
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