Need some support and reassurance
elphie754
Posts: 7,574 Member
I am so bummed right now. Stepped on the scale and my weight was once again 260. I almost started to cry. I had promised myself that I would never reach this weight again.
Im pregnant right now, so m sure part of that weight is due to baby, but it still upsets me.
Im pregnant right now, so m sure part of that weight is due to baby, but it still upsets me.
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Replies
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Don't worry about it now being pregnant. I am still trying to lose baby weight I gained from my 7 year old (I had another pregnancy too) I wish I knew what I knew now back then! I don't know if your going to be breastfeeding if you are you will have to be a little more careful with the calorie counting but if your not you can start calorie counting then with me the only exercise I can do is walking even if I just walk back and forth in my garage while the 2 year old is napping2
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Hugs Elphie, it will be alright.4
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Elphie, I'm sure mentally this is very difficult. Not sure how far along you are, but if you're far enough to either feel the baby move or have the baby belly popping out, put your hands on your belly and remind yourself your body is doing an amazing thing. You are growing a baby. If your doctor is allowing you to lose (or not gain at all) then go back to what you know - weighing and logging. It may not bring the scale down, but it will give you the sense that you are not overdoing things. If you can walk each day, then walk. It will make you feel better, is great prep for labor, and won't burn a ton of calories (thus not having to worry about losing). (((hugs))) to you.5
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kksmom1789 wrote: »Don't worry about it now being pregnant. I am still trying to lose baby weight I gained from my 7 year old (I had another pregnancy too) I wish I knew what I knew now back then! I don't know if your going to be breastfeeding if you are you will have to be a little more careful with the calorie counting but if your not you can start calorie counting then with me the only exercise I can do is walking even if I just walk back and forth in my garage while the 2 year old is napping
I hope it doesn't take me 7 years as well lol. Yes i do plan on breast feeding0 -
Thank you!queenliz99 wrote: »Hugs Elphie, it will be alright.ronjsteele1 wrote: »Elphie, I'm sure mentally this is very difficult. Not sure how far along you are, but if you're far enough to either feel the baby move or have the baby belly popping out, put your hands on your belly and remind yourself your body is doing an amazing thing. You are growing a baby. If your doctor is allowing you to lose (or not gain at all) then go back to what you know - weighing and logging. It may not bring the scale down, but it will give you the sense that you are not overdoing things. If you can walk each day, then walk. It will make you feel better, is great prep for labor, and won't burn a ton of calories (thus not having to worry about losing). (((hugs))) to you.
Im 22w3d. Yes it is very hard emotionally. Doctor wants be to gain no more than 10-15 bs. Going to ask at next appointment if it would be safe to lose right now.0 -
Thank you everyone for the support. I've decided to stray off the scales for the time being because the number just gets me worked up. Still going to continue weighing and logging my food so the gain doesn't get out of control.2
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We'll all be here to cheerlead you along the journey and once baby arrives. It's a temporary diversion while you create a new human and looking forward to that is priority number one.2
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VintageFeline wrote: »We'll all be here to cheerlead you along the journey and once baby arrives. It's a temporary diversion while you create a new human and looking forward to that is priority number one.
I know, but it still bummed me out a bit. Better for me if I just stay off the scale.0 -
Maybe ask your dr for a specific diet plan (most probably this will mean a reference to a dietitian)?0
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Maybe ask your dr for a specific diet plan (most probably this will mean a reference to a dietitian)?
No. I already have dietary restrictions due to severe allergies that have led me to stop breathing. I have gotten really good at avoiding my allergens, so I won't tamper with that. Besides, I'm also a firm believer of you can eat anything as long as it fit into your calorie goal.5 -
Oh Elphie, I do feel for you. Long time since I was pregnant but I remember these feelings. The 2 pregnancies did do a number on my weight and thus my esteem and I had a lot of worries about getting back to a more manageable 'happy' size.
The 2nd trimester is really where pregnancy takes on new meaning in bumps growing amazingly quickly and greater weight gain for both baby and Mum, at least that was what happened for me. All I can say is that I ate like IDGAF for the 1st one ie: I basically had the idea that eating for 2 meant EATING for 2 adults. I was wiser the 2nd time round and ate a lot more mindfully and well avoiding my previous 'addiction' to Caramello Koalas but still I gained the same amount....which was around the 27 kg mark. I had the sadz over this as I missed those damn Koalas.
I am wondering too whether you aren't experiencing some delayed inflammatory reaction due to the illness and allergy response you had to the meds. for the eye infection. Bodies are weird and wonderful things and the pregnant body has a mind of it's own. The weight may very well be a lot of fluid rather than actual gain.
Other than that I can reassure you that although your body will be different after this pregnancy, there is no reason to stop you get back into losing and travelling along the road you were on before pregnancy. Once you give yourself time to recover and find your feet....remember though take it easy, the tiredness that comes with a 1st baby is really nothing anyone can ever prepare for, so don't be too eager to bust out and force yourself to hard.
Personally, I think you should be extremely proud of yourself. This has not been an easy pregnancy. You have been ill at least once that I am aware of, suffering itchy skin which is such a sucky thing to endure. Probably too you have been coping with sore boobs, tiredness, mood swings, swollen feet, bursting bladder, achy back etc etc....getting through 9 months of any/all of this makes women Saints in my eyes.
You have my support, empathy and greatest respect. Sending Hugs and Love.
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You have something very important to do now. Having a child is a miracle. You know your hormones are going crazy so it's easy to be emotional--it's all part of the package. Right now, you want a safe birth. If your doctor OK's, walk alot and stay as active as possible. Watch your intake, but don't stress. Get enough rest, keep your feet up once in a while, and it may sound stupid, but enjoy this time as much as you can. Congratulations!!!1
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((elphie))2
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HippySkoppy wrote: »Oh Elphie, I do feel for you. Long time since I was pregnant but I remember these feelings. The 2 pregnancies did do a number on my weight and thus my esteem and I had a lot of worries about getting back to a more manageable 'happy' size.
The 2nd trimester is really where pregnancy takes on new meaning in bumps growing amazingly quickly and greater weight gain for both baby and Mum, at least that was what happened for me. All I can say is that I ate like IDGAF for the 1st one ie: I basically had the idea that eating for 2 meant EATING for 2 adults. I was wiser the 2nd time round and ate a lot more mindfully and well avoiding my previous 'addiction' to Caramello Koalas but still I gained the same amount....which was around the 27 kg mark. I had the sadz over this as I missed those damn Koalas.
I am wondering too whether you aren't experiencing some delayed inflammatory reaction due to the illness and allergy response you had to the meds. for the eye infection. Bodies are weird and wonderful things and the pregnant body has a mind of it's own. The weight may very well be a lot of fluid rather than actual gain.
Other than that I can reassure you that although your body will be different after this pregnancy, there is no reason to stop you get back into losing and travelling along the road you were on before pregnancy. Once you give yourself time to recover and find your feet....remember though take it easy, the tiredness that comes with a 1st baby is really nothing anyone can ever prepare for, so don't be too eager to bust out and force yourself to hard.
Personally, I think you should be extremely proud of yourself. This has not been an easy pregnancy. You have been ill at least once that I am aware of, suffering itchy skin which is such a sucky thing to endure. Probably too you have been coping with sore boobs, tiredness, mood swings, swollen feet, bursting bladder, achy back etc etc....getting through 9 months of any/all of this makes women Saints in my eyes.
You have my support, empathy and greatest respect. Sending Hugs and Love.HippySkoppy wrote: »Oh Elphie, I do feel for you. Long time since I was pregnant but I remember these feelings. The 2 pregnancies did do a number on my weight and thus my esteem and I had a lot of worries about getting back to a more manageable 'happy' size.
The 2nd trimester is really where pregnancy takes on new meaning in bumps growing amazingly quickly and greater weight gain for both baby and Mum, at least that was what happened for me. All I can say is that I ate like IDGAF for the 1st one ie: I basically had the idea that eating for 2 meant EATING for 2 adults. I was wiser the 2nd time round and ate a lot more mindfully and well avoiding my previous 'addiction' to Caramello Koalas but still I gained the same amount....which was around the 27 kg mark. I had the sadz over this as I missed those damn Koalas.
I am wondering too whether you aren't experiencing some delayed inflammatory reaction due to the illness and allergy response you had to the meds. for the eye infection. Bodies are weird and wonderful things and the pregnant body has a mind of it's own. The weight may very well be a lot of fluid rather than actual gain.
Other than that I can reassure you that although your body will be different after this pregnancy, there is no reason to stop you get back into losing and travelling along the road you were on before pregnancy. Once you give yourself time to recover and find your feet....remember though take it easy, the tiredness that comes with a 1st baby is really nothing anyone can ever prepare for, so don't be too eager to bust out and force yourself to hard.
Personally, I think you should be extremely proud of yourself. This has not been an easy pregnancy. You have been ill at least once that I am aware of, suffering itchy skin which is such a sucky thing to endure. Probably too you have been coping with sore boobs, tiredness, mood swings, swollen feet, bursting bladder, achy back etc etc....getting through 9 months of any/all of this makes women Saints in my eyes.
You have my support, empathy and greatest respect. Sending Hugs and Love.
You are absolutely right that this hasn't been easy. The pregnancy has caused my allergies to act up, and break out constantly (reaction to the hormones according to my allergist). I seem to be getting every complication known to mankind lol. The good thing though is I have an amazing support system at home.
Thank you for the a outraging words. In sometimes get so wrapped up in how miserable I've been feeling that it can be hard to see the big picture.2 -
Incredibly understandable and natural to have these feelings. Taking each day at time and looking after yourself mentally and physically in the best possible way is a really positive step.
You will find that you are more strong and resourceful than you ever believed.
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Thank youHippySkoppy wrote: »Incredibly understandable and natural to have these feelings. Taking each day at time and looking after yourself mentally and physically in the best possible way is a really positive step.
You will find that you are more strong and resourceful than you ever believed.HippySkoppy wrote: »Oh Elphie, I do feel for you. Long time since I was pregnant but I remember these feelings. The 2 pregnancies did do a number on my weight and thus my esteem and I had a lot of worries about getting back to a more manageable 'happy' size.
The 2nd trimester is really where pregnancy takes on new meaning in bumps growing amazingly quickly and greater weight gain for both baby and Mum, at least that was what happened for me. All I can say is that I ate like IDGAF for the 1st one ie: I basically had the idea that eating for 2 meant EATING for 2 adults. I was wiser the 2nd time round and ate a lot more mindfully and well avoiding my previous 'addiction' to Caramello Koalas but still I gained the same amount....which was around the 27 kg mark. I had the sadz over this as I missed those damn Koalas.
I am wondering too whether you aren't experiencing some delayed inflammatory reaction due to the illness and allergy response you had to the meds. for the eye infection. Bodies are weird and wonderful things and the pregnant body has a mind of it's own. The weight may very well be a lot of fluid rather than actual gain.
Other than that I can reassure you that although your body will be different after this pregnancy, there is no reason to stop you get back into losing and travelling along the road you were on before pregnancy. Once you give yourself time to recover and find your feet....remember though take it easy, the tiredness that comes with a 1st baby is really nothing anyone can ever prepare for, so don't be too eager to bust out and force yourself to hard.
Personally, I think you should be extremely proud of yourself. This has not been an easy pregnancy. You have been ill at least once that I am aware of, suffering itchy skin which is such a sucky thing to endure. Probably too you have been coping with sore boobs, tiredness, mood swings, swollen feet, bursting bladder, achy back etc etc....getting through 9 months of any/all of this makes women Saints in my eyes.
You have my support, empathy and greatest respect. Sending Hugs and Love.HippySkoppy wrote: »Oh Elphie, I do feel for you. Long time since I was pregnant but I remember these feelings. The 2 pregnancies did do a number on my weight and thus my esteem and I had a lot of worries about getting back to a more manageable 'happy' size.
The 2nd trimester is really where pregnancy takes on new meaning in bumps growing amazingly quickly and greater weight gain for both baby and Mum, at least that was what happened for me. All I can say is that I ate like IDGAF for the 1st one ie: I basically had the idea that eating for 2 meant EATING for 2 adults. I was wiser the 2nd time round and ate a lot more mindfully and well avoiding my previous 'addiction' to Caramello Koalas but still I gained the same amount....which was around the 27 kg mark. I had the sadz over this as I missed those damn Koalas.
I am wondering too whether you aren't experiencing some delayed inflammatory reaction due to the illness and allergy response you had to the meds. for the eye infection. Bodies are weird and wonderful things and the pregnant body has a mind of it's own. The weight may very well be a lot of fluid rather than actual gain.
Other than that I can reassure you that although your body will be different after this pregnancy, there is no reason to stop you get back into losing and travelling along the road you were on before pregnancy. Once you give yourself time to recover and find your feet....remember though take it easy, the tiredness that comes with a 1st baby is really nothing anyone can ever prepare for, so don't be too eager to bust out and force yourself to hard.
Personally, I think you should be extremely proud of yourself. This has not been an easy pregnancy. You have been ill at least once that I am aware of, suffering itchy skin which is such a sucky thing to endure. Probably too you have been coping with sore boobs, tiredness, mood swings, swollen feet, bursting bladder, achy back etc etc....getting through 9 months of any/all of this makes women Saints in my eyes.
You have my support, empathy and greatest respect. Sending Hugs and Love.
You are absolutely right that this hasn't been easy. The pregnancy has caused my allergies to act up, and break out constantly (reaction to the hormones according to my allergist). I seem to be getting every complication known to mankind lol. The good thing though is I have an amazing support system at home.
Thank you for the a outraging words. In sometimes get so wrapped up in how miserable I've been feeling that it can be hard to see the big picture.
Not sure how I missed that before (thank you autocorrect)-that was supposed to be encouraging words.1 -
VintageFeline wrote: »We'll all be here to cheerlead you along the journey and once baby arrives. It's a temporary diversion while you create a new human and looking forward to that is priority number one.
I know, but it still bummed me out a bit. Better for me if I just stay off the scale.
My OB gave me a range of weight to gain. After I had gained more than the top end of the range, I decided to stay off the scale. I was eating as well as I could and exercising as consistently as I could so the scale wouldn't change anything I was doing. I did feel better and better as the pregnancy progressed, despite my size, and I hope you do too. (((Hugs))).1 -
(((hugs)))2
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(((( ))) 2
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Maybe ask your dr for a specific diet plan (most probably this will mean a reference to a dietitian)?
No. I already have dietary restrictions due to severe allergies that have led me to stop breathing. I have gotten really good at avoiding my allergens, so I won't tamper with that. Besides, I'm also a firm believer of you can eat anything as long as it fit into your calorie goal.
In general, I would agree. But what happens when this is not working and you are also pregnant? Your weight already makes this a high risk pregnancy, and not stepping on the scale will not make the risk lower. I do not understand all the "no worries, you are pregnant". Obesity is a risk factor for several complications, so having a medically supervised plan to avoid further weight gain or even lose weight, depending on dr's instructions, sounds safer than not worrying.1 -
Maybe ask your dr for a specific diet plan (most probably this will mean a reference to a dietitian)?
No. I already have dietary restrictions due to severe allergies that have led me to stop breathing. I have gotten really good at avoiding my allergens, so I won't tamper with that. Besides, I'm also a firm believer of you can eat anything as long as it fit into your calorie goal.
In general, I would agree. But what happens when this is not working and you are also pregnant? Your weight already makes this a high risk pregnancy, and not stepping on the scale will not make the risk lower. I do not understand all the "no worries, you are pregnant". Obesity is a risk factor for several complications, so having a medically supervised plan to avoid further weight gain or even lose weight, depending on dr's instructions, sounds safer than not worrying.
So going to a dietitian, having them change what actually works for me and keeps me safe, and try a new way of eating that could
Kill me is better? No.
Last time I went to a dietitian, they quite literally gave me a food plan that would have killed me because they didn't understand my allergies.
I didn't need a lecture about my weight, I needed some support. This is not helpful. I'm already panicking literally everyday about the baby, I don't need you to make it worse.3 -
Aww Congratulations on being pregnant. Babies are a gift. Don't worry about the weight now, just log and eat healthy for the two of you. The weight will come off later.2
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Maybe ask your dr for a specific diet plan (most probably this will mean a reference to a dietitian)?
No. I already have dietary restrictions due to severe allergies that have led me to stop breathing. I have gotten really good at avoiding my allergens, so I won't tamper with that. Besides, I'm also a firm believer of you can eat anything as long as it fit into your calorie goal.
In general, I would agree. But what happens when this is not working and you are also pregnant? Your weight already makes this a high risk pregnancy, and not stepping on the scale will not make the risk lower. I do not understand all the "no worries, you are pregnant". Obesity is a risk factor for several complications, so having a medically supervised plan to avoid further weight gain or even lose weight, depending on dr's instructions, sounds safer than not worrying.
But what she said WILL work. Right now she is growing a baby though so there will be some weight gain due to that. Eating everything within your calories has worked great for many people, myself included. She doesn't need some diet plan. OP, I know how stressful it is. I was obese during my 2nd pregnancy and really stressed about too much weight gain. Right now your focus needs to be on baby and try not to stress too much about the weight.3 -
Maybe ask your dr for a specific diet plan (most probably this will mean a reference to a dietitian)?
No. I already have dietary restrictions due to severe allergies that have led me to stop breathing. I have gotten really good at avoiding my allergens, so I won't tamper with that. Besides, I'm also a firm believer of you can eat anything as long as it fit into your calorie goal.
In general, I would agree. But what happens when this is not working and you are also pregnant? Your weight already makes this a high risk pregnancy, and not stepping on the scale will not make the risk lower. I do not understand all the "no worries, you are pregnant". Obesity is a risk factor for several complications, so having a medically supervised plan to avoid further weight gain or even lose weight, depending on dr's instructions, sounds safer than not worrying.
But what she said WILL work. Right now she is growing a baby though so there will be some weight gain due to that. Eating everything within your calories has worked great for many people, myself included. She doesn't need some diet plan. OP, I know how stressful it is. I was obese during my 2nd pregnancy and really stressed about too much weight gain. Right now your focus needs to be on baby and try not to stress too much about the weight.
Exactly. It's led me to lose 100lbs in the past (I got lazy when we added another person to our household). Right now I'm supposed to be gaining (eating 300 calories above maintainence) according to my OB. I just don't like seeing the number go up.0 -
You're doing just fine, @elphie54. Remember it's not much fat you're gaining. It's the baby, the placenta, the amniotic fluid, a 30% increase in blood volume, retained water...
Your health and your baby's health are more important than a number on a scale. If your OB says you should be gaining, listen to that advice and take care of yourself. 3 -
You're doing just fine, @elphie54. Remember it's not much fat you're gaining. It's the baby, the placenta, the amniotic fluid, a 30% increase in blood volume, retained water...
Your health and your baby's health are more important than a number on a scale. If your OB says you should be gaining, listen to that advice and take care of yourself.
Thank you.0 -
You are pregnant so cut yourself some slack
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trigden1991 wrote: »You are pregnant so cut yourself some slack
Easier said than done lol.0 -
So much good advice here. Food allergies are so hard! We dealt with some anaphylactic food allergies for quite awhile and it's exhausting staying diligent. You're doing a great job! Just hang in there. It feels like forever but you're more then half way. Just do your best food wise and deal with it afterwards. I completely get your panic. I did that too. I think @avskk gave you great advice and I would just echo that for trying to deal with the mental aspect of the weight. I wish someone had suggested I look at the weight gain that way. I think it would have been helpful to have a specific place to put the weight focus.
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