Need advice: How do I take weight loss one day at a time? Please Respond/Friend me

Oh, I dunno. I've lost 85 lb this year and all I did was have breakfast (big, focusing on protein and fiber), lunch (small), and dinner (big, more focus on protein and fiber). I exercise some, but not every day like a gym rat.

Set small attainable goals for yourself. try starting with 10 pounds . A short walk during your lunch break and take the stairs instead of the elevator when possible. You can do this.

I'd work on getting the family situation settled first as that will likely reduce stress, thus reduce your bad eating. If not, just get into the habit of logging what you eat.

I agree with a lot of the posts.... start small (ex) add a glass of water before each meal, walk during commercial breaks if you watch tv, there are also some great at home exercises to build strength and muscle (using things at home). Some have more to lose that 40-60 lbs and stress definitely does contribute to bad eating, depression, and lack of exercise. Glad that you and your wife are working it through... hopefully you can be on the same page with your health. Think about it like this, your good health is not just for you but for your wife and your kids also. Add something small and doable each day or week, until it becomes a habit- at least that has worked for me. Good luck!

Yep, life has a habit of kicking your *kitten* now and again.
I had been trying to lose the same 30lbs for 5 years. In hindsight I had a lot going on during those 5 years so I just couldn't commit, Focus, follow through etc. The recession, losing a business, owing the banks money, setting up a new business, working 70 hour weeks, pregnancy loss (still birth) bereavement and yes all of those things also took their toll on my marriage. But, but that is in the past, I've let it go. Things are better now so I can focus a little on me. It's only looking back now I realise I wouldn't have been able to take anything else on at that time.
Focus on the here and now, practice the attitude of gratitude, be thankful for the good things today. Things have improved in your workplace, and in your home life. Focus on that. It sounds like you are still carrying some stress and anxiety from the tough few months past. Maybe go and talk to someone even if it's only one session. Just get it all out there, let it go and move on.
You are here, you are healthy, things are way better than you realise.
Enjoy your life, your family and your food!
Just weigh and log and stay in your goals.
Good luck.

You can do this. I lost the first 40 lbs without no exercise at all and I have a desk job. I started running eventually not because I needed it to lose the weight, but because it felt great. It's all about the deficit. Track everything every day and just stay with it.

What worked for me was keeping my blood sugar level throughout the day. This meant eating 6 times a day in measured amounts. I kept my snacks small but high in protein so they stayed with me and I always drank a full glass of water with every meal and every snack. I never felt hungry.

I agree it's more about a lifestyle change. It's not really going on a diet at all. Yes, you have to create a calorie deficit in order to lose the weight, but once you do, you have to continue to eat the same way, but you can eat larger portions.

The idea of 10 lb "mini goals" is a great one. They'll come around faster than you think too.

Wow, you have been through a lot and are still standing. That is amazing.
You need to give yourself a break in regards to the weight gain. It happened, yes, and it will take a while to rectify it - but you have already started.
You are obviously a strong person who has dealt with some major life changes. You have the determination and resolve to make the lifestyle changes you need. Sure there will be some bumps in your quest for a healthy you, but that is when you shrug it off and remember how awesome you are.
Don't worry about the days or the pounds - just know that you are making the right decisions and it WILL pay off.

You've got this.

I need to lose about the same amount of weight.

My advice? Do not focus on losing all the weight. I try not to even keep track of how many pounds I have left until goal. I find it stressful and overwhelming.

Instead, every week I make a goal of losing 1lb. Even though I have MFP set up to 1.5 lbs a week loss I give myself some leeway and in my mind I'm only trying to lose 1 lb a week. When I weigh in then and meet my weekly goal I feel terrific about myself.

The weight will come off in time. You have to believe that and it won't be so overwhelming. No, it won't happen overnight, but if you keep to your goals it will happen.

Practice the Art of Frugality with your diet. This will pay extraordinarily handsome dividends to both your waistline and wallet. Part of this Art, naturally, is cooking from scratch and eating things in modest proportions.

You don't say what you are currently eating, other than it is "crap"...are you or your wife already cooking from scratch, since it sounds like she has ample down time and would appreciate making a valuable financial contribution to the household, or are you eating low-quality, high calorie fast food?

The more I cook from scratch, the cheaper it is, and the food is high quality and low calorie. Here are some ideas:

-I got a 10 lb bag of chicken legs for $6 at Kroger a couple of weeks ago--I've been roasting them and using the meat for cheap chicken dishes (chicken and noodles, chicken and dumplings: the noodles and dumplings can be made from scratch) and the bones and scraps for chicken stock.
-You can at the same time roast a big batch of chopped potatoes, onions, butternut squash, and carrots with a little olive oil and a lot of garlic. The perfect complement to chicken, freakin' delicious, super cheap, and a powerhouse of reasonable-calorie nutrition.
-Bake your own whole-grain bread, or make muffins, banana bread or zucchini bread. Bread made form scratch is super cheap, and you can fill quick breads with all kinds of healthy things.
-If you're still hungry, saute a mess of frozen greens with a little bacon and garlic. Use this to bulk out your dinners instead of too many potatoes or bread. Or roast a pile of cauliflower.
-Stock up on oranges, apples and bananas for lunch--whatever is cheap and in season.
-Learn all about soups of all kinds! Julia Child has an amazing Potato-Leek recipe--it is the first recipe in her Art of French Cooking. If you have ham, save the hambone for bean soup. Turn all your roasted bones and meat scraps into stock.
-Eat oatmeal (made with milk and fruit and just a tsp or two of brown sugar) and eggs for breakfast.
-Roll out your own pie crust using lard and make a classic French quiche lorraine or a spinach and leek quiche or something else packed with veggies and using a light hand on the cheese.
-Make flank steak a regular part of your diet--it is lean and delicious.
-Learn to make a roux and cook the world-class cuisine of New Orleans, which is basically poor folks' cooking, black and white.
-Buy the very best extra virgin olive oil and balsamic vinegar that you can afford. The BEST, especially for the vinegar, it should be the dark and viscous kind that you may have to order or find at a fancy specialty store. I have found it in pomegranate, black currant, etc. flavors at those shops where you can taste-test everything. Combine it in equal amounts and add a bit of dijon mustard and shake to emulsify. This will be your secret weapon to drizzle lightly on pork, roasted chicken, roasted veggies, and salads. I keep a squeeze bottle on my desk at work and one on the counter at home. It even turn a nasty (to me!) pile of raw spinach and kale into a very satisfactory little salad!

Cooking can be a huge time suck, from one perspective, but if you turn it into a hobby (or even a game--the challenge of taking very inexpensive ingredients and magically transforming them into serious cuisine) it can become a great source of please and a chance for your family to spend time and bond together.

Keep in mind that those days will pass anyway. They can pass with you actively practicing healthy habits and getting closer to your goal, or they can pass with you moving further away from your goal; you can choose how you spend the time, but time is going to keep moving forward. There literally isn't any way to take it other than one day at a time.

For the most part, weight loss doesn't happen because of huge, dramatic changes. It happens because of small actions that we repeat over time. That's good news, because those small actions don't tend to disrupt your daily life, and you sound like the last thing you need is more stress.

There used to be a very active poster here who had lost something like 120 pounds (could've been more, I'm not sure). He used to tell people that he didn't lose 120 pounds, he lost 1 pound, 120 times. 40-60 pounds sounds like a huge undertaking, but 1 pound is easy to lose. Start there, then do it again.

Something I've started doing when I go to gym classes and feel like not doing it... I imagine my future slimmer self thanking me in that moment for my efforts today.

Honestly, being on here and faithfully logging food and exercise is an enormous help. Each day is a new day here, and the end of each day is a tremendous motivator as you close out your diary and it tells you where you will be if "every day were like today." I don't even focus on the scale or the belly or anything like that. I focus on today only. Success is not a goal, it's a result. If you do the small things toward success, you will get there. Don't focus on the end, focus on the journey.

Log what you eat, focus on one week of weight loss at a time and try to reduce your stress. From the sound of your situation it looks like the worst is over and it will get better soon. I wish you the best of luck