Can I get some people to help motivate me

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f4istunter4
f4istunter4 Posts: 3 Member
in Goal: Gaining Weight and Body Building
Hi guys not going to lie here. I have a sad story I'm 27 and only weigh 127. My heaviest weight was 162 but I was 19 and was in the gym everyday. Now my wife is wanting to leave me for guys more muscular than me. Can I have some people help push me to gain the weight and such. You help is much appreciated.
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  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,535 Member
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    If you need pushing, then you're really not wanting to do it. Motivation is internal. You can get all the inspiring, cheering on, etc, but if you really don't want to do it, it may not happen anyway.

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  • f4istunter4
    f4istunter4 Posts: 3 Member
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    I get what your saying. I have the drive. I know I can do it. In one year I went from 118 to 162. All by sheer will power and encouragement from others. It's just that little bit of encouragement that helps keep one on track. I was getting it from my wife then girlfriend but now I get nothing but put down. Not sure how to put it in words lol. I guess just dig deep like I used to for paintball practice "which is when I gained the weight" and do it all over again.
  • Jokerz9
    Jokerz9 Posts: 24 Member
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    Is 127 lbs or kg, and yeah i can help you to gain weight, lean muscle mass, tell me what you eat all day, if you want you can text me also.
  • trigden1991
    trigden1991 Posts: 4,658 Member
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    Jokerz9 wrote: »
    Is 127 lbs or kg, and yeah i can help you to gain weight, lean muscle mass, tell me what you eat all day, if you want you can text me also.

    You seem to ask everyone to text you in all your comments. Can I ask why you can't just post advice on here like everyone else?
  • Cylphin60
    Cylphin60 Posts: 863 Member
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    Due respect OP, you need counseling and help getting your priorities straight, not motivation.

    Your marital problems are deeper than who has the most muscles. Seek professional help there. It just might be salvageable if you're willing to give it your all.

    Your physical conditioning should be a priority whether you're in the land of milk and honey, or down in the valley. You need to take care of yourself regardless of what she is doing.

    I would dare say your mental, emotional and spiritual health should be first though. Get help. Take care of sorting "Yourself" out first, and the rest will naturally fall in line, and things will look completely different to you once they do.

    You cannot "Fix" her. You can do something about you. Go do it.
  • Commander_Keen
    Commander_Keen Posts: 1,181 Member
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    f4istunter4 wrote: »
    Hi guys not going to lie here. I have a sad story I'm 27 and only weigh 127. My heaviest weight was 162 but I was 19 and was in the gym everyday. Now my wife is wanting to leave me for guys more muscular than me. Can I have some people help push me to gain the weight and such. You help is much appreciated.

    Sorry, Bud,
    If you wife wants to leave, let her leave. whats next for you if she stays, cosmetic surgery?
    If you want to get bigger for you, there are motivation photo's, before/after photo's all over the internet
  • f4istunter4
    f4istunter4 Posts: 3 Member
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    Thanks cylphin your words seem to be what most of my friends are saying on the marriage part. I probably should have specified with where I wanted the help lol. Like in how I'm eating and gaining weight and muscle. I have already been able to do the one gallon of water a day thing. Only took 4 days and I have already felt so much better about myself on that. I guess I am looking for people to try and coach me along. Like say keep up the good work as I gain and keep me on track if I mess up. I just feel it's easier to tell ones story up front that way you don't have a ton of people going ok now why do you want this an so on. Thanks again. By the way I'm 127lbs not kg
  • joemac1988
    joemac1988 Posts: 1,021 Member
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    For motivation watch "The Perfect Physique". You'd proabably relate to David Morin lol. Also, get a gym partner; someone that will hold you accountable to show up. But, most importantly freakin EAT!! I'm eating 4500 calories a day (500c/150f/300p) and barely increasing weight...right about 200lbs.
  • Cylphin60
    Cylphin60 Posts: 863 Member
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    f4istunter4 wrote: »
    Thanks cylphin your words seem to be what most of my friends are saying on the marriage part. I probably should have specified with where I wanted the help lol. Like in how I'm eating and gaining weight and muscle. I have already been able to do the one gallon of water a day thing. Only took 4 days and I have already felt so much better about myself on that. I guess I am looking for people to try and coach me along. Like say keep up the good work as I gain and keep me on track if I mess up. I just feel it's easier to tell ones story up front that way you don't have a ton of people going ok now why do you want this an so on. Thanks again. By the way I'm 127lbs not kg

    You're on the right path then :) Just be patient and remember it's going to take time, but as someone new, you stand to make a lot of quick gains early on.

    The workouts can also be a good stress relief from what you're dealing with. I know this from personal experience with my ex :)

    There are some great threads here outlining ways to go from "new" to being well on your way.

    Start with the "Most helpful posts" at the top of this forum. There are several excellent threads there for exactly what you're asking. Once you start to get a sense of where you're going with this and develop better, clearer goals, other questions will come up. Best of luck :)

  • Cylphin60
    Cylphin60 Posts: 863 Member
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    JoeMacCready wrote: »
    For motivation watch "The Perfect Physique". You'd proabably relate to David Morin lol. Also, get a gym partner; someone that will hold you accountable to show up. But, most importantly freakin EAT!! I'm eating 4500 calories a day (500c/150f/300p) and barely increasing weight...right about 200lbs.

    Jeez! I'd burst lol! :#
  • joemac1988
    joemac1988 Posts: 1,021 Member
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    Cylphin60 wrote: »
    JoeMacCready wrote: »
    For motivation watch "The Perfect Physique". You'd proabably relate to David Morin lol. Also, get a gym partner; someone that will hold you accountable to show up. But, most importantly freakin EAT!! I'm eating 4500 calories a day (500c/150f/300p) and barely increasing weight...right about 200lbs.

    Jeez! I'd burst lol! :#

    Ya know what? I thought I would too! In hindsight I mustve been eating waaay below maintenance...I used to eat about 2750 cals.
  • Cylphin60
    Cylphin60 Posts: 863 Member
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    JoeMacCready wrote: »
    Cylphin60 wrote: »
    JoeMacCready wrote: »
    For motivation watch "The Perfect Physique". You'd proabably relate to David Morin lol. Also, get a gym partner; someone that will hold you accountable to show up. But, most importantly freakin EAT!! I'm eating 4500 calories a day (500c/150f/300p) and barely increasing weight...right about 200lbs.

    Jeez! I'd burst lol! :#

    Ya know what? I thought I would too! In hindsight I mustve been eating waaay below maintenance...I used to eat about 2750 cals.

    I usually cap off a day around 1900ish or so, then again I'm not a large guy and am still slowly dropping a bit. All I can think though, is I would love to have the freedom that 4500 would bring lol. That's probably a matter of perspective too though...
  • joemac1988
    joemac1988 Posts: 1,021 Member
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    Cylphin60 wrote: »
    JoeMacCready wrote: »
    Cylphin60 wrote: »
    JoeMacCready wrote: »
    For motivation watch "The Perfect Physique". You'd proabably relate to David Morin lol. Also, get a gym partner; someone that will hold you accountable to show up. But, most importantly freakin EAT!! I'm eating 4500 calories a day (500c/150f/300p) and barely increasing weight...right about 200lbs.

    Jeez! I'd burst lol! :#

    Ya know what? I thought I would too! In hindsight I mustve been eating waaay below maintenance...I used to eat about 2750 cals.

    I usually cap off a day around 1900ish or so, then again I'm not a large guy and am still slowly dropping a bit. All I can think though, is I would love to have the freedom that 4500 would bring lol. That's probably a matter of perspective too though...

    It's nice but a bit of a struggle! I'm eating all. the. time. lol
  • _benjammin
    _benjammin Posts: 1,224 Member
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    ninerbuff wrote: »
    If you need pushing, then you're really not wanting to do it. Motivation is internal. You can get all the inspiring, cheering on, etc, but if you really don't want to do it, it may not happen anyway.
    That's harsh. A motivational support system is a tremendous help for success.

  • joemac1988
    joemac1988 Posts: 1,021 Member
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    _benjammin wrote: »
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    If you need pushing, then you're really not wanting to do it. Motivation is internal. You can get all the inspiring, cheering on, etc, but if you really don't want to do it, it may not happen anyway.
    That's harsh. A motivational support system is a tremendous help for success.

    I agree. He has it backwards; motivation is external, inspiration is internal.
  • atowinram
    atowinram Posts: 8 Member
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    The most important thing is to be doing it for yourself (to be healthy, have more energy, improve your self-image). If you do it to gain the approval of another person or to "show them" that you can do it, then it will be a hollow victory. The power to define your "success" will be in another person's hands and not your own.

    Both of my teenage sons are beanpoles and struggle to gain weight...I was the same way for many years and understand how frustrating it can be. If you need an "atta boy" on a rough day, just holler!
  • Bridogg72
    Bridogg72 Posts: 45 Member
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    Honesty there is only two things you need to decide
    1 what weight do you want to be
    2 do you really want a non supportive wife in your life (regardless of the weight you are)
  • Cylphin60
    Cylphin60 Posts: 863 Member
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    JoeMacCready wrote: »
    _benjammin wrote: »
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    If you need pushing, then you're really not wanting to do it. Motivation is internal. You can get all the inspiring, cheering on, etc, but if you really don't want to do it, it may not happen anyway.
    That's harsh. A motivational support system is a tremendous help for success.

    I agree. He has it backwards; motivation is external, inspiration is internal.
    I very much agree.
    atowinram wrote: »
    The most important thing is to be doing it for yourself (to be healthy, have more energy, improve your self-image). If you do it to gain the approval of another person or to "show them" that you can do it, then it will be a hollow victory. The power to define your "success" will be in another person's hands and not your own.

    Both of my teenage sons are beanpoles and struggle to gain weight...I was the same way for many years and understand how frustrating it can be. If you need an "atta boy" on a rough day, just holler!
    Well said :)
  • Bridogg72
    Bridogg72 Posts: 45 Member
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    Swap the gallon of water for a gallon of milk

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