husband sabotaging my efforts!

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  • wizzybeth
    wizzybeth Posts: 3,573 Member
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    showerbeer182 wrote: »
    Zieskej wrote: »
    Remain strong!!! The first time I did it, I did not have family support, but I managed. I bought stuff and ate my stuff. My husband acknowledged today that I am on a "diet" when we were discussing lunch. He wanted Arby's, so when I got home from picking it up, I immediately grabbed a knife, cut my sandwich in half, put other half in fridge. I ate one French fry. It is a process.

    Do you say it like...AREbees....or do you do AIRbees...I've heard it both ways....

    ARE-bees
  • WayTooHonest
    WayTooHonest Posts: 144 Member
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    siraphine wrote: »
    Seriously, 99% of marital problems can be solved by getting off the computer and saying what you're spouting to strangers online to your husband - the one that matters and can help change the situation with you.

    @siraphine In for a REAL close second place win.

  • DancesWithDogz
    DancesWithDogz Posts: 107 Member
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    aka62792 wrote: »
    NO ONE can make you do what you do not want to do. My Friend lost 100 pounds, with an Idiot bringing Pizza, M&M, Cheesecake etc etc home every day. WHY ? He wanted her Fat because if she lost weight other Guys would be interested. She Ignored the MORON, looks Gorgeous and is married to a more supportive Hunk.

    EXACTLY what I said above... they keep feeding us to make sure we remain unattractive... seen it...
  • indiacaitlin
    indiacaitlin Posts: 691 Member
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    Have a chat with him and explain that what you're doing really means a lot to you and you'd appreciate his support, maybe part of that would be limiting the amount of unhealthy food in the house. At the same time though, he's probably not doing anything deliberately and if he's not following any kind of specific diet plan himself then it's going to be give and take from you both :smile:
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 17,959 Member
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    Some of the projection in this thread is astounding. He made her favourite cookies... for a POT LUCK. Not for her! To give away to people. Who knows, maybe they're her favourite because they're amazing. Maybe all the friends and neighbours think so too. Maybe they *shock* requested them?

    Seriously, equating him baking cookies for a potluck to him wanting to keep her fat so she doesn't leave him is ludicrous. Even the posts about a spouse bombarding someone with donuts and sweets and ignoring requests not to are out of proportion to this. He made cookies. To give away. Not even for his wife. Sheesh.
  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,261 Member
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    Alatariel75 wrote: »
    Some of the projection in this thread is astounding. He made her favourite cookies... for a POT LUCK. Not for her! To give away to people. Who knows, maybe they're her favourite because they're amazing. Maybe all the friends and neighbours think so too. Maybe they *shock* requested them?

    Seriously, equating him baking cookies for a potluck to him wanting to keep her fat so she doesn't leave him is ludicrous. Even the posts about a spouse bombarding someone with donuts and sweets and ignoring requests not to are out of proportion to this. He made cookies. To give away. Not even for his wife. Sheesh.

    I completely agree.

    I am a complete nut about homemade chocolate cake with homemade chocolate icing. My husband and I use the same recipe that I love. I cannot describe how much I love this cake. Anyway, when his workplace has a potluck, the people ask him to bring that cake and he does. Sometimes I help him, sometimes I don't. He'll ask if I want him to bring me home a piece and sometimes I say yes and sometimes I say no.

    I've learned self control by practicing self control. It's like a muscle. You need to work it to build it. Yes, I try to limit tempting foods in the house but I have never attempted to limit what my husband can have or make. Not even in my earliest days of dieting have I done that, and I was a huge eat-all-the-cookies/cake/treats-in-large-quantities eater.
  • aka62792
    aka62792 Posts: 98 Member
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    Alatariel175 jemhh WHOA ! The comment I posted was regarding, someone I knew well. Her Husband WAS
    PURPOSELY TRYING TO KEEP HER FAT. When they met in High School, she was overweight and he did not care. After her
    first Pregnancy, she was ENORMOUS. Her Health was affected, her Doctor and her Friends were very worried about her. After she collapsed at work, found out she had Diabetes, SHE changed. He did everything in his power to keep her FAT, so she left. THE END !
  • DancesWithDogz
    DancesWithDogz Posts: 107 Member
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    Alatariel75 wrote: »
    Seriously, equating him baking cookies for a potluck to him wanting to keep her fat so she doesn't leave him is ludicrous.

    You missed the point...(there are a dozen comments here, so easy to do)... it was a comment, as to what can happen sometimes in response to another poster - not specific to OP ...
  • faramelee
    faramelee Posts: 163 Member
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    I wonder what @dufferoo makes of all of this?
  • justkris_gettingfit
    justkris_gettingfit Posts: 239 Member
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    It's okay to say "No" in a marriage.
    Changing your eating habits is a one way street. To have support on that journey is a gift, it is not a given. Yeah, it sucks, but that's reality.

    I wanted a gym membership, but my husband told me I didn't have time to workout because I have to take care of our 4 kids, while he goes to the gym 4-5 times a week. Know what I did? I found the time to work out when/if I feel like it. Because this lifestyle change is for ME, MYSELF, and I. No one else.

    Just remember what you do some of the time doesn't override what you do the majority of the time.
  • Madux1818
    Madux1818 Posts: 307 Member
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    AnAbsoluteDiva wrote: »
    I ignore all the stupid stuff my husband does. It's why we're still married.


    Lol, same here.

  • alyssa0061
    alyssa0061 Posts: 652 Member
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    He made the cookies for a potluck, not for your dinner
  • vmtama27
    vmtama27 Posts: 43 Member
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    Sit and have a talk with him. Let him know how important this is for you and eventually he'll adjust. My husband grocery shops differently because of me and I'm very grateful for it
  • aka62792
    aka62792 Posts: 98 Member
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    I agree, everyone I know Parties nonstop. I personally cannot stand drunks, so I leave parties pretty quickly. I have NO PROBLEM with any of my Family or Friends who do it.
  • Naina149
    Naina149 Posts: 16 Member
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    My husband does the same things but I wouldn't call it sabotage, he is going about his normal way of life. I'm the one who decided to make a change and I can't expect him to do so too, this is my journey, not his. During the week it's not that bad he eats whatever I cook for the most part but on the weekends I know to expect pizza, burgers etc in the house, if I want some I make sure it fits into my goals for the day log it in and go about my way or I will make sure my healthier meal is already cooked so when he eats whatever he brought home I won't be as tempted.
  • shetland
    shetland Posts: 55 Member
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    It's hard, but at the end of the day, YOU are the one in charge of YOU, and no one else. I have eliminated all sugar unless it is naturally in the food. I still have to cook for my husband and two kids who are not on a reduced sugar plan. It is hard, but I realize that I need to be able to be around it, cook for my family, and go out to restaurants, etc. While it would be really nice if he were 100% supportive and on-board, the reality is that he isn;t and most likely won;t be, so you will have to be strong and stick to your plan. If you 100% stick to it, at the end of the first week, you should be feeling SO much better and the cravings will all but disappear. The first week was the hardest when I cut out sugar.
  • courtneyfabulous
    courtneyfabulous Posts: 1,863 Member
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    faramelee wrote: »
    I wonder what @dufferoo makes of all of this?

    Yeah I don't think I've seen any response from OP at all?
  • brebarlows
    brebarlows Posts: 1 Member
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    I would def. Want my husband to not flaunt cookies around me right at first! It is hard seeing those things! Fast food cookies sweets in general ....maybe just have a talk to him let him no hey I'm on a diet I need motivation! Maybe he will be more curtious try to snack when your not around at least until you get used to eating healthy! Just my opinion! Good luck
  • CatchMom11
    CatchMom11 Posts: 462 Member
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    xRezin wrote: »
    My wife makes it very very difficult for me to watch my weight as well. And I got all the way up to 285 pounds, and then very very careful over the course of the next two years and got down on the 180ish.

    She slowly introduced junk food and stuff back, and I climbed back up to about 235. Managed to stop and get down to 190 again.

    But here we are same crap again. Nothing but junk food coming into the house and I'm back up to 203 already.

    Many of you can have support, but take it from me... Weight loss journey is when you are truly alone on. Even if they TRY to be with you, you are still alone.

    Is your wife force feeding you? Don't blame your wife for YOUR actions. YOU have to be accountable for YOU. You can control YOUR actions, not someone else's. You need to practice accountability and stop blaming your wife.

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