Isn't he overreacting?

trytpbme1
trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
edited November 15 in Chit-Chat
Since we can post random things here: here goes...:


There's guy I used to talk to that I haven't seen in almost 3 years texted me a few weeks ago a little background
( we used to talk text see each other all the time but when I graduated high school I stopped talking to a few people and he was one of them , we do talk every 6-8 months but it's only a hi and bye type of talk) and I said he could come over if I wasn't busy when I got off of work... I forgot to text him back that day and a few days later I texted him "good morning" and he said " good morning what happened to us seeing each other a few days ago?" And I said "I got off late and went straight to sleep" after that text I sent he didn't text me back until yesterday when he called me with a little attitude. he said "Kara" I said "hey what's up" he said "where have you been I've been trying to reach you all day" .
I said "I've been busy" then he asked "well what are you doing right now and I said nothing?" And he says "I've been trying to call you all day we could've been chilling together all day ," and I said "I had to work" and he said "what happened to me coming over your house a weeks ago " and I said " I forgot when I got off of work I was tired" and he said " you're always working" and then I said
" I texted you and you didn't text back" and he said "Kara you did not text me and he said I've been calling you too" I said "you did not call me and he said Kara I've been calling you I called like 100 faking times " and I said "why didn't you leave me a voicemail" that's when he said "I don't leave voicemails" and then he hung up on me
Tl:dr; so he obviously has an attitude with me and I don't know why, I want to see him but I got so busy. He is a sensitive guy from past experiences within him so I'm guessing that's a reason why he hung up.
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Replies

  • jbeth30
    jbeth30 Posts: 42 Member
    Sounds like he is a little intense...like he has some self esteem kind of issues that you can't fix and seems to be needy. I would keep this one at arms length for sure. Seems like he could get controlling really fast.
  • FruityFridays
    FruityFridays Posts: 16 Member
    In five years, when you guys are married, he will slap you because you glanced at a waiter. Avoid, avoid, avoid!! This guys is a nutjob.
  • LittleLionHeart1
    LittleLionHeart1 Posts: 3,655 Member
    He sounds like he's a little bit crazy. He's a walking red flag. Keep him at bay.

    ^^^^^This ^^^^^
    Keep focus on your job like you already are. :) Signs of being unhealthy & controling. Nip it at the bud sooner than later.
  • Unknown
    edited February 2017
    This content has been removed.
  • Miz_T
    Miz_T Posts: 150 Member
    It sounds like he's horned up and since you are not complying, he thinks he can talk to you like he owns you. AVOID!
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    Miz_T wrote: »
    It sounds like he's horned up and since you are not complying, he thinks he can talk to you like he owns you. AVOID!
    He sounds like a whiny little b!tch baby too me. Cut that one loose.
    HyeKarma wrote: »
    He sounds like he's a little bit crazy. He's a walking red flag. Keep him at bay.

    ^^^^^This ^^^^^
    Keep focus on your job like you already are. :) Signs of being unhealthy & controling. Nip it at the bud sooner than later.
    In five years, when you guys are married, he will slap you because you glanced at a waiter. Avoid, avoid, avoid!! This guys is a nutjob.
    He sounds like he's a little bit crazy. He's a walking red flag. Keep him at bay.

    Thanks for answering guys!!
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    There is absolutely nothing wrong with this. You guys are practically married and he cares about you. This shows he is committed to the relationship and well committed. Hes not a quitter and you shouldn't question anything he does. I would consider quitting your job so your not so busy and can give him more of your time or at least so he can keep an eye on you without waiting outside your work.

    I haven't had a long conversation with him in almost 3 years lol, there is no relationship
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    If you really wanted to see him you would have made time. Sounds like he is much more interested in you than you are in him, so you should probably cut things off completely to spare both of you future aggravation.

    Yeah you're right thanks for answering
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    Most people take being blown off badly. I would suggest that if you have no intent to see him or develop a healthy interaction with him then be honest about it and leave him alone.
    jbeth30 wrote: »
    Sounds like he is a little intense...like he has some self esteem kind of issues that you can't fix and seems to be needy. I would keep this one at arms length for sure. Seems like he could get controlling really fast.

    Thanks guys!
  • TavistockToad
    TavistockToad Posts: 35,719 Member
    He was going to 'come over'... in his head that's for sex, he likes you and doesn't like that you blew him off...
  • This content has been removed.
  • kwph
    kwph Posts: 7,375 Member
    Time 2 trim the fat!
  • PandoraGreen721
    PandoraGreen721 Posts: 450 Member
    LL5lifts wrote: »
    I'd put a stuffed animal horse head on his porch with fake blood on it and attach a little card saying "A little gift from The Family. Smile...they're always watching. " then little xxoo and your name, that way he knows you can outcrazy him if you want to.

    This is the best. A girl I knew used to say, "You have to outcrazy the crazies." It stuck with me. :wink:
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    kwph wrote: »
    Time 2 trim the fat!
    LL5lifts wrote: »
    I'd put a stuffed animal horse head on his porch with fake blood on it and attach a little card saying "A little gift from The Family. Smile...they're always watching. " then little xxoo and your name, that way he knows you can outcrazy him if you want to.


    Nicely said haha! Thanks guys
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    I admit, that was a very riveting conversation.


    Lol how so?
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    He was going to 'come over'... in his head that's for sex, he likes you and doesn't like that you blew him off...

    Thanks for answering
  • PowerMan40
    PowerMan40 Posts: 766 Member
    Runn..... run... little girl there are better more mature men out there for you. Drama wants drama, and makes drama
  • acorsaut89
    acorsaut89 Posts: 1,147 Member
    While relationships have changed he seems a little unstable to me, so I would recommend walking away from this one.

    You know what never fails to amaze me (outside of this situation) is how people say they want one thing and then when it hits them in the face they back away.

    Case in Point: I am single. I am doing online dating right now as a way to hopefully meet more people and perhaps even the right one for me. Anyways, I 'ran' into a guy that I used to work with on the online website and we were chatting away, very friendly. And he says the typical things: I want a smart, successful woman who can handle herself and has a lot going on for her. Essentially someone like you (his words, not mine). Anyways, he gets around to asking if I want to have coffee/dinner and I said sure. He asked when I'm free and it happened to be about a week after we were chatting. He responds by saying "Geez, you're so busy! Can't make time for me until then?" . . . but 5 minutes ago, he wants someone who has their life together and things going on in their life . . . so you want that, but then someone who will drop all of it for someone they don't even really know on a personal level??? Then we agreed to that day and he didn't text me until the day after that scheduled date. I texted him on the Thursday to see if we were still on for meeting up and where he wanted to meet him. SILENCE!

    I was kind of blown away because he texted me saying "I guess you aren't that interested since you didn't want to meet up yesterday". And I am thinking wait, I texted you to confirm this and nothing came back so what am I supposed to do? So I responded as much and he responded with something like "I don't chase anyone, so if you want to see me then you have to let me know".

    Has it really come to this? Seriously? If I see something (or someone I want) I will make sure I do what I can to show I am interested. But him? No. However if you want someone who is successful and smart and yada yada she probably has things happening in her life: so if you want her, let her know too.
  • Reaverie
    Reaverie Posts: 405 Member
    He DOES seem a bit unstable. And pushy for someone just recently let back into your life. I have a friend who promises one thing then gets "distracted" with work and gaming. It's irritating but we aren't a couple so I have no hold over him. On the flip side I do this a lot to another guy friend of mine who thinks he can force me to be more social like him. He gets frustrated with me but knows better than to act like I belong to him. All 3 of us are best friends and we respect the fact that we each lead our own lives outside of one another. This dude needs to back off and clue in that you are an adult with a job and hobbies that don't include him. If you set an exact time to hang then it would be rude to break it . Then he would have a valid reason to be pissed at you. But just saying you two should hang sometime with no actual plan in place means that the time is of your choosing and still up in the air.
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    It seems like he expected something very different than you from this interaction and you aren't really friends.
    I'd let things die with the hang up and not respond further to calls or texts from him.
  • Gimsteinn
    Gimsteinn Posts: 7,678 Member
    My English isn't good enough to keep up with what I just read... All I got was that your name is Kara
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    Gimsteinn wrote: »
    My English isn't good enough to keep up with what I just read... All I got was that your name is Kara

    Thanks for reading anyways !
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    Lounmoun wrote: »
    It seems like he expected something very different than you from this interaction and you aren't really friends.
    I'd let things die with the hang up and not respond further to calls or texts from him.

    What do you mean expected something different
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    PowerMan40 wrote: »
    Runn..... run... little girl there are better more mature men out there for you. Drama wants drama, and makes drama

    Lol
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    acorsaut89 wrote: »
    While relationships have changed he seems a little unstable to me, so I would recommend walking away from this one.

    You know what never fails to amaze me (outside of this situation) is how people say they want one thing and then when it hits them in the face they back away.

    Case in Point: I am single. I am doing online dating right now as a way to hopefully meet more people and perhaps even the right one for me. Anyways, I 'ran' into a guy that I used to work with on the online website and we were chatting away, very friendly. And he says the typical things: I want a smart, successful woman who can handle herself and has a lot going on for her. Essentially someone like you (his words, not mine). Anyways, he gets around to asking if I want to have coffee/dinner and I said sure. He asked when I'm free and it happened to be about a week after we were chatting. He responds by saying "Geez, you're so busy! Can't make time for me until then?" . . . but 5 minutes ago, he wants someone who has their life together and things going on in their life . . . so you want that, but then someone who will drop all of it for someone they don't even really know on a personal level??? Then we agreed to that day and he didn't text me until the day after that scheduled date. I texted him on the Thursday to see if we were still on for meeting up and where he wanted to meet him. SILENCE!

    I was kind of blown away because he texted me saying "I guess you aren't that interested since you didn't want to meet up yesterday". And I am thinking wait, I texted you to confirm this and nothing came back so what am I supposed to do? So I responded as much and he responded with something like "I don't chase anyone, so if you want to see me then you have to let me know".

    Has it really come to this? Seriously? If I see something (or someone I want) I will make sure I do what I can to show I am interested. But him? No. However if you want someone who is successful and smart and yada yada she probably has things happening in her life: so if you want her, let her know too.
    Reaverie wrote: »
    He DOES seem a bit unstable. And pushy for someone just recently let back into your life. I have a friend who promises one thing then gets "distracted" with work and gaming. It's irritating but we aren't a couple so I have no hold over him. On the flip side I do this a lot to another guy friend of mine who thinks he can force me to be more social like him. He gets frustrated with me but knows better than to act like I belong to him. All 3 of us are best friends and we respect the fact that we each lead our own lives outside of one another. This dude needs to back off and clue in that you are an adult with a job and hobbies that don't include him. If you set an exact time to hang then it would be rude to break it . Then he would have a valid reason to be pissed at you. But just saying you two should hang sometime with no actual plan in place means that the time is of your choosing and still up in the air.

    Thank you guys so much for answering
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,423 Member
    trytpbme1 wrote: »
    Lounmoun wrote: »
    It seems like he expected something very different than you from this interaction and you aren't really friends.
    I'd let things die with the hang up and not respond further to calls or texts from him.

    What do you mean expected something different

    He probably expected that you inviting him over to hang out that day meant more than just a lukewarm "if I remember... it would be okay to see you... I guess."
    You didn't think it was important to see him. You still don't. It was more important to him. .
    I don't know if he is just pissed because a friend blew off plans and acted like it didn't matter or he wanted sex and thought that was going to happen with you. You have different expectations or understanding of what you want to happen or how you should be acting.
    Doesn't really matter what he thinks. You haven't seen him for years and barely communicated in that time by choice. Don't worry about this unimportant non-relationship. Don't respond to his calls or texts again.
  • trytpbme1
    trytpbme1 Posts: 107 Member
    Lounmoun wrote: »
    trytpbme1 wrote: »
    Lounmoun wrote: »
    It seems like he expected something very different than you from this interaction and you aren't really friends.
    I'd let things die with the hang up and not respond further to calls or texts from him.

    What do you mean expected something different

    He probably expected that you inviting him over to hang out that day meant more than just a lukewarm "if I remember... it would be okay to see you... I guess."
    You didn't think it was important to see him. You still don't. It was more important to him. .
    I don't know if he is just pissed because a friend blew off plans and acted like it didn't matter or he wanted sex and thought that was going to happen with you. You have different expectations or understanding of what you want to happen or how you should be acting.
    Doesn't really matter what he thinks. You haven't seen him for years and barely communicated in that time by choice. Don't worry about this unimportant non-relationship. Don't respond to his calls or texts again.


    Ahh okay
  • dniania
    dniania Posts: 251 Member
    Stay away
This discussion has been closed.