I am so embarrassed.....

all_4_my_son
all_4_my_son Posts: 8 Member
in Getting Started
Hopped on the scale yesterday, swore I would never allow myself to get over 300 pounds - scale said 322. I am so ashamed and humiliated, mainly because I did it to myself and now, I don't know how to undo it. Logging my food and exercising has not helped in the past - I just gain it right back.

I don't know what to do this time around, but I know I'm tired, I can't breathe or bend over, I can't fit in a booth at a restaurant anymore and I couldn't even fasten my seat belt in my sister's SUV the other night.

I know, it's a pity party, but it seems to be all I'm good at anymore because being healthy, I clearly suck at!
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Replies

  • littleworm23
    littleworm23 Posts: 341 Member
    I agree with the posters above. Making small changes is much easier than trying to change everything at once. Maybe you focus on adding more water like SueHolt3 said and when that becomes normal you add something else like walking more each day. Also go slow like livingleanlivingclean suggested. It will take longer to see results but the things you are doing become your daily routine. It is much more likely to maintain weight loss if you look at it as a lifestyle change not a diet. Diets end. If you think "I'm so glad that's done!" you are way more likely to go back to your old ways. Maintaining can be hard, I have days when I slide back into old ways, you have to catch yourself and get back on track. We are all human, it happens. Just don't let it stop you. Good luck. You can add me if you would like to.
  • dejavuohlala
    dejavuohlala Posts: 1,821 Member
    You can do it. You need to keep at it everyday, be patient, log everything and go not give up. You are looking at a lifestyle change, change one thing at a stone and enjoy looking Forbes healthy food option and stay focused. Good luck you
    Must do this for the sake of your health
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,393 Member
    Baby steps. Just start, don't aim for perfection.

    How about just logging your food and spending ten minutes looking at your Food Diary at the end of the day and making a note of how you could improve a tiny bit.

    One day at a time, it's all we have.
  • marelthu
    marelthu Posts: 184 Member
    It's helped me to go to a dietitian to get advice about nutrition and serving sizes. Maybe that would be a good place to start?
  • zdyb23456
    zdyb23456 Posts: 1,706 Member
    I agree with small baby steps. Logging everything you eat/drink and looking at where you can cut back. Maybe instead of chips, switch to pretzels, or even better a piece of fruit. Instead of soda, switch to diet soda or sparkling water.

    Then find ways to increase your daily activity. Start small. Take the stairs, park further away, go for a walk around the block. Walk up and down the aisles at the grocery store - I do this to get extra steps in. Get a Fitbit and start tracking how active you are. Challenge yourself to up your steps every week.
  • 1princesswarrior
    1princesswarrior Posts: 1,242 Member
    I did the same thing, lost the weight, swore I would never go back...and I went back. I gained the weight back because I quit logging and being accountable.

    But I started logging again and I'm getting back on track now, slowly but surely that is. I quit shaming myself and instead said okay let's take this one day at a time and it's okay to make mistakes along the way. When I overeat I log it now instead of ignoring it. And when I hold myself accountable I'm less likely to overeat. My diary is public.

    Start slow, make small and attainable goals, start walking, even if it is just down the driveway or the hallway right now and go 20 steps farther tomorrow. Add 1 serving of vegetables to your daily food intake. Small steps like others have already said.

    You can do it.
  • mayadgr8
    mayadgr8 Posts: 2 Member
    I had my annual physical this year and my doctor said i'm at the pre-diabetic border and i need to lose weight. So i have decided for myself and for my family to DO IT. My doctor gave me a shot of a B12 and gave me a food plan to eat for 3 months. She also said i had to have other medications to really help me lose weight. Although one medication was an appetite suppressant that did not make me feel good so I decided to stop that and just continue with the meal plan which is high protein and practically NO CARBS diet... tomorrow will be exactly a week and I have lost 8 lbs. I can't believe how fast I'm losing weight just by cutting my carbs out of my diet. I've also decided to track my food here and hopefully by walking an hour a day will benefit me more. My start weight was 241.1 and I'm now at 232. I was very scared starting this diet because I know I have failed many times before and I pray to God for help and strength and to fight any temptations that come my way. My goal is 120 lbs. but I'm breaking that down by 3. So for now my goal is to reach 200 lbs, then 160lbs, and finally 120 lbs. With God's grace I hope to reach it.
  • JohnnyLowCarb
    JohnnyLowCarb Posts: 418 Member
    all_4_my_son wrote: »
    Hopped on the scale yesterday, swore I would never allow myself to get over 300 pounds - scale said 322. I am so ashamed and humiliated, mainly because I did it to myself and now, I don't know how to undo it. Logging my food and exercising has not helped in the past - I just gain it right back.

    I too started and gave up on logging my food, eating better, it's hard there is no way around it. I cant tell you its easy. BUT you have to keep TRYING, there is no shame in trying and failing, just keep trying, you know its the right thing to do, for yourself and those you love. For me it eventually clicked and with My Fitness Pal it was the easiest way to keep track, I tried spreadsheets and it failed miserably. I am now on track and so will YOU!
  • emilyvictoria7
    emilyvictoria7 Posts: 102 Member
    I think I know how you feel to an extent. I was steady at my weight for 3 years, still very overweight but I was tired of trying to lose any and tried to move on to acceptance. Then, over the last 2 years (but the majority in the last 8mo) I gained almost 50 pounds. I weighed in at my heaviest - 270lbs. So I told myself I was going to start making small changes after a long period of misery and self loathing. I was always telling myself constantly how gross I was. Stopped letting my partner touch me. I didn't want that, but I also wanted to eat whatever I want and not exercise so I started making little changes. Turns out, you can't eat whatever you want but you can change what you love to eat over time.

    For the first week I just looked at what I was eating. Then, I set my calorie goal to lose one lbs a week while also checking to see what my maintenance intake would be so I would let myself be kind to myself and not worry if I ate over my daily intake. Either way I would lose even if it was just oz.

    For a few days I struggled a lot with the hunger, but I started to figure it out. I started cooking better meals. I found snacks that made me fuller through research and the community boards on this app. I didn't look at the scale for five weeks because I didn't want to get on and see I hadn't lost. I told myself I'd wait and see if I felt better, which I did. My house cleaning outfit, of all things, looked better after the five weeks so I got on the scale.

    So far, it's been 65 days and when I weighed in last weekend I had lost 13.1lbs so far. No exercise, just calorie counting. It happens. I'm not saying it's by any means perfect and I have a long way to go, but I feel less intimidated now if I want to cut my calorie limit to lose 2lbs a week, or if I start slowing introducing exercise or walking. I'm in it for the long hall.

    I really like setting little goals. My first is 20lbs between Jan 1 and Easter Weekend. My second will be similar over the same period of time when I figure out what my next big date will be. My hope is to lose 71lbs this year to get down to 199lbs finally, but if I don't reach it that's okay too. After 199lbs, who knows. I won't be done, but that's the number that's important to me right now.

    Also, like I've seen mentioned about about folks saying a lot of it is psychological, I'm in counseling. Not for my food issues, but for my personal ones that cause me to overeat like I do. It's something that helps and makes me feel better every time I go, even though it's painful when I'm there.

    I hope this helps. Please feel free to add me or message me, we all need support and I'd also be happy to have yours :)
  • HopeTracker
    HopeTracker Posts: 16 Member
    Just one step at a time. That's what I keep telling myself. It feels overwhelming but if we stick with it, eventually a few days will turn into weeks and before we know it, months. I think this calorie tracker will work if we stick with it. :)
  • 1234newman
    1234newman Posts: 31 Member
    Ultimately it is all about changing life habits and what we eat is one of those. However the other habits such as the unresolved stresses in our lives do impact on eating. We can punish ourselves for not being loved as a child, or for lack of friends, as examples.

    Knowing that we are on the brink of a some serious chronic disease, diabetes for instance, or finding twinges of pain indicating impending loss of mobility from overloaded knees and hip, can give us the incentive to decide to eat differently.

    However at some stage we need to address those mental injuries from life history, especially unsatisfactory childhood, that are harming us mentally. Beating yourself up mentally is what we do to 'atone' when we wrongly blame ourselves for old history that we cannot do anything about.

    What about a medical practitioner to refer to you to a counsellor to help you work through things? To reduce your attention to those self-punishing thoughts and voices that are yesterday and self-limiting.

    I am on a long journey too and like all here and all humans, I have to concentrate on and deal with this moment and today. That is enough.

    Environment - I know I have to throw out anything in the fridge and pantry that is not OK for my body. I need to decide in advance what food I can buy that is not calorie dense fast food if I am out past a meal time.
  • size102b
    size102b Posts: 1,370 Member
    all_4_my_son wrote: »
    Hopped on the scale yesterday, swore I would never allow myself to get over 300 pounds - scale said 322. I am so ashamed and humiliated, mainly because I did it to myself and now, I don't know how to undo it. Logging my food and exercising has not helped in the past - I just gain it right back.

    I don't know what to do this time around, but I know I'm tired, I can't breathe or bend over, I can't fit in a booth at a restaurant anymore and I couldn't even fasten my seat belt in my sister's SUV the other night.

    I know, it's a pity party, but it seems to be all I'm good at anymore because being healthy, I clearly suck at!

    Don't be just take this a day at a time hey ...,
    Last year I was 231 got down to 167 now I'm back to 206 because I hit real sick thought I had lung cancer I didn't thanks god but life happens
    Am I demoralised YES but the whole point is we are doing something about this and tbh it's just a number - those scales are just a number

    We can do this add me :)
  • cmedwards52
    cmedwards52 Posts: 81 Member
    You just gave yourself three very good reasons to MAKE this work for YOU and they are all health related not to mention "happy" related. Maybe post those on your fridge instead of a magazine photo. You might also post photos of the very special people in your life that you want to stick around for. Just sayin.....................
  • kenyonhaff
    kenyonhaff Posts: 1,377 Member
    Hey, hey.... you're here ready to make a change and to tell strangers about it. That's really brave. You just took a couple steps in the right direction so keep going!
  • Nikion901
    Nikion901 Posts: 2,467 Member
    You did it ... and you can UNDO it .... just know that the undo part is a long journey with lots of detours and booby traps along the way ... be ready for them!
  • cessi0909
    cessi0909 Posts: 654 Member
    Don't be embarrassed, you can do this -- you can get to a point that you feel good in your skin! But there is no reason for the embarrassment.
  • nutmegoreo
    nutmegoreo Posts: 15,532 Member
    cmriverside wrote: »
    Baby steps. Just start, don't aim for perfection.

    How about just logging your food and spending ten minutes looking at your Food Diary at the end of the day and making a note of how you could improve a tiny bit.

    One day at a time, it's all we have.

    I agree with this. Don't make big sweeping changes. Small changes that you can live with will be much more sustainable in the long run. Log what you are currently eating. You might find it eye opening. I was surprised at how high calories some of my previous staple foods were before logging them. Once I knew, I could still enjoy them, but maybe half the serving.

    Baby steps. Persistence and consistence are what you need. If you have a rough day, don't throw it all away, just refocus.
  • Meghan952
    Meghan952 Posts: 2 Member
    I would recommend the book (and the CD that comes along with it) called "I Can Make You Thin" by John McKenna. It has made a difference in my life and my husband's life. It is very affordable and very helpful; I bought it off of Amazon. Best of luck!
  • Bluwaves1
    Bluwaves1 Posts: 191 Member
    You have to have some motivation to lose the weight and stick to it. Some need that your weight is preventing from being filled. when you find that, focus on it and let that drive you toward success. Do not stop once you start.
  • Tonkajoe
    Tonkajoe Posts: 14 Member
    Don't be embarrassed. But start to take care of yourself first! Keep logging everything you eat -even if its over your calorie goal. Consider the change you need to make is "for the rest of your life." Like every human on the planet you have a health issue. Some are farsighted, some are bald, some (sadly) have cancer .. some have to be super careful about what they eat --for the rest of your life -- its okay -- like I said everyone has "something." Slowly build a plan and then once you have that plan --never change it. You will NEVER go off this diet -- you will from now on always watch what you eat. Again - its okay - make a "game" out of it. Use all the data and tools you can find - get a fitbit - get a really good smart scale - again consider this to be something you have to do -for the rest of your life. Again - thats not a bad thing. Full time athletes that make a ton of money - spend their whole life watching what they eat and do. Full time supermodel's do the same thing. They count every calorie. All those movie stars and people you see on tv -- they ALL watch every calorie. One thing ive found lately thats helpful is watching a lot of transformation videos on Youtube -- a lot of these people have a lot of good information about their success. So you dont have to go it alone even -- watch a bunch of them - select a couple you think are similar to yourself and follow their goals along with your own. I hope you find success. T.

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