We broke up because...
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This one time I was tea bagging her and she bit me0
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Is a wimp and cant take a few love bites and scratchings.0
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I didn't finish in her mouth and she missed the taste0
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His "finish" tastes like clam chowder.0
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Her clam tastes like trout0
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He liked trout too much, couldnt get enough of it.0
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I stuffed her trout deeply with the tartar sauce..0
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Because he flirts with men!0
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He made me blush and cringe at the same time.0
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Shoebacha1 wrote: »He made me blush and cringe at the same time.
I have the talent to provide a rollercoaster of emotions..
Blush is good, red trout is healthy0 -
He was too poetic in his speech. Made me cross my moral boundaries, and like it.0
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I liked stretching her boundaries1
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He never took me to meet his family0
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You simply couldn't drive in reverse and eat a banana at the same time. Shameful...
( I just did it, it was the best I could come up with)1 -
She wouldn't do my make up (seriously you've got skills, love your eyeshadow talent)0
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She would not participate in my vampyre bedroom fantasies.0
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She sucked my blood0
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She wanted to tie me down and bite me.. I barely got out alive0
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Was not type "O" blood type0
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She always wanted the D0
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He couldn't keep up.0
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Only had 1,740 posts.0
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I couldn't get a good night's sleep because of the always wet bed0
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1741, but who's counting?0
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Always wore diapers to bed0
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Actually she was wetting the bed.. night and morning0
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Got me pregnant then cleared out with the neighbour0
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Got pregnant?! I thought she was in love with me!0
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