Is it wrong not to comment or like a private diary

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Replies

  • christys03
    christys03 Posts: 22,783 Member
    I dont. How do u comment on something u have no idea about....
  • nefudaboss
    nefudaboss Posts: 69 Member
    Lmao cause i could drink 1200 calories of red wine and close out my diary itll say I'm under pat me on the back lmao they don't want accurate help apparently i wish someone would be like bro you can't keep eating buttery popcorn trying to fit it into macros just eat veggies
  • PaulaWallaDingDong
    PaulaWallaDingDong Posts: 4,640 Member
    nefudaboss wrote: »
    Lmao cause i could drink 1200 calories of red wine and close out my diary itll say I'm under pat me on the back lmao they don't want accurate help apparently i wish someone would be like bro you can't keep eating buttery popcorn trying to fit it into macros just eat veggies

    Nothing wrong with popcorn. And people aren't always....I'd even say aren't usually looking for help.
  • A_Rene86
    A_Rene86 Posts: 141 Member
    nefudaboss wrote: »
    Lmao cause i could drink 1200 calories of red wine and close out my diary itll say I'm under pat me on the back lmao they don't want accurate help apparently i wish someone would be like bro you can't keep eating buttery popcorn trying to fit it into macros just eat veggies

    Right, but this is only an issue if someone specifically asked for your help. I, for example, don't ask for or want any help in the form of dietary advice, so I keep my diary private to avoid comments from people who feel the need to offer it unsolicited anyway.
  • dwntwn5
    dwntwn5 Posts: 69 Member
    I'm glad you asked this. I've got a few friends who have locked diaries, but then complete it so it posts on the newsfeed, why why why? What's even more confounding is the likes and 'good job' comments they get :huh: I have never liked or commented on a locked diary, because i have zero idea what the hell it is I'm liking!!!!

    Because they don't know that you can change your settings to not post, or don't care enough not to, I suppose.

    I complete my diary most days so that it is a mental signal that I'm done eating for the day! I didn't realize there was a way to turn it off, frankly. I thought it just auto-generated that update on my feed.

    Also, I usually click "like" to celebrate with people that they met their calorie goal. I rarely, if ever, go into my friends' diaries to look at entries and would never judge what they were eating! Just like I hope they aren't judging my food choices. But, I never expect people to "like" any of my feed. Who has time for that drama?
  • TR0berts
    TR0berts Posts: 7,739 Member
    I'm glad you asked this. I've got a few friends who have locked diaries, but then complete it so it posts on the newsfeed, why why why? What's even more confounding is the likes and 'good job' comments they get :huh: I have never liked or commented on a locked diary, because i have zero idea what the hell it is I'm liking!!!!


    Perhaps they like the 5-week prediction?
  • JessicaMcB
    JessicaMcB Posts: 1,503 Member
    Honestly I have a closed diary and I would find it weird if people were commenting on closed entries for me- who knows what I have going on in there ;) haha

    The only time I bother to comment on open diary friends' entries is when they ate something interesting and I want to know if it was good or not!
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 25,827 Member
    Theo166 wrote: »
    I deliberately turned off notifications for posting when I close my diary because it is on private and I don't need someone randomly cheering for me when they have no idea what I ate that day. I kinda feel like if your diary is closed but you get annoyed if people don't like or comment when you close it, you're being a bit of a goose, frankly.

    And my diary is closed because I have no need or desire to have people comment on my food choices. If I ever feel the need to ask advise I might open it, but I really don't see that happening.

    I didn't realize we had this control until reading the thread. Have now turned off most of my notifications to stop spamming my friends. Wish MFP had them turned off by default, a clean newsfeed would help to see what friends are actually saying.

    I pretty much abandoned my feed when we were getting spammed by "X is now friends with Y" messages. This was turned on by default in an update. I think it might be turned off now but was so annoying as to make the newsfeed unusable.
  • cb2bslim
    cb2bslim Posts: 153 Member
    I normally don't have the time to read everyone's meals. In addition, I don't want to get hungry right before I go to bed. lol I tend to only "like" and not comment on my friends diary even if they are over in calories. The way I see it, they are logging to make themselves a healthier person and staying true to themselves. That is what the "thumbs up" means to me. I'm not their judge. What works for one doesn't work for the other. My mfp friends are a huge support and I never mind being someone's cheerleader or even a motivator. It's reciprocated so nothing bad can come from having friends.

    With that said, for those who have their diaries open and I have time to read a few, something positive comes about. I may find a recipe I can ask someone about or someone was a guinea pig and tried out a new food product. Overall, a diary opened or closed never bothered me in a negative way.

    Now I wish we can control what we see on our own news feed aka friend's becoming friends with others. That gets to be a little too much.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 25,827 Member
    I have a number of friends who have private diary's so I do not know how they did when I see they were under so I don't comment or like bec I feel I can not accurately support them if I can not see their progress is that rude?

    I have a few people in my friends list who I know are under-eaters. I stopped liking their diary completions because I feel this gives them positive affirmation for unhealthy behavior. Then, I stopped liking everyone else's as well unless I was going to look at their diary which I am not unless asked.
  • brittyn3
    brittyn3 Posts: 481 Member
    A_Rene86 wrote: »
    I just want to give my 2 cents as someone with a closed diary that no, I don't think it's rude at all! I used to have my diary open, but I found that it resulted in more frequent comments on my dietary choices than I was comfortable with (be it during a discussion in the forums or from friends on my page). As an example of what I mean, sometimes I will weigh out a proper serving (according to package directions), then find that the MFP entry doesn't have it by weight. However, I know that I weighed out the gram equivalent of a 1/2 cup based on the package so logging it as such results in the same calories/macros being recorded without my having to re-enter the whole thing. Other users see this "1/2 cup", assume I'm not weighing and offer a diatribe on the inaccuracy of measuring cups. This discouraged me, so I cut out the cause.

    Having said all that, I also recognize that many people are suspicious of a closed diary and hesitant to congratulate an accomplishment they don't have any information on! And further, I get the impression most people don't expect congratulations on these auto-generated posts anyway :)

    Ugh. This why I a) closed my diary, b) turned off the newsfeed posts for it, and c) rarely even "complete" it anyway. Had a few jelly bellies logged and got a lecture on how the candy industry is evil and it's all a conspiracy to keep us addicted and all this nonsense. Like "Hey, I just want some damn jelly beans. Get off my *kitten* about how I want to spend my last 24 calories for the day, huh?"

    The only time I like or comment on someone's newsfeed post is if I know that they need the encouragement for whatever reason. Either they're new, having trouble, been down on themselves or whatever. I assume most people are as annoyed by the flood of notifications they have to clear from their phone as I am when they haven't really done anything special.

    Same, I like my friends updates so it'll give them a notification and keep them logging/exercising etc. But, I don't think it's rude if you don't. I don't always do it, I only do it if they haven't exercised or tracked food for a while.
  • try2again
    try2again Posts: 3,564 Member
    TR0berts wrote: »
    I'm glad you asked this. I've got a few friends who have locked diaries, but then complete it so it posts on the newsfeed, why why why? What's even more confounding is the likes and 'good job' comments they get :huh: I have never liked or commented on a locked diary, because i have zero idea what the hell it is I'm liking!!!!


    Perhaps they like the 5-week prediction?

    You can close your diary & get the 5 week prediction without having to post it on the news feed. :)
  • Christine_72
    Christine_72 Posts: 16,056 Member
    try2again wrote: »
    TR0berts wrote: »
    I'm glad you asked this. I've got a few friends who have locked diaries, but then complete it so it posts on the newsfeed, why why why? What's even more confounding is the likes and 'good job' comments they get :huh: I have never liked or commented on a locked diary, because i have zero idea what the hell it is I'm liking!!!!


    Perhaps they like the 5-week prediction?

    You can close your diary & get the 5 week prediction without having to post it on the news feed. :)

    Yep, that's what i did.

    I turned off the notification to post my diary on my newsfeed (not that i complete it regularly), because i hate the attention focused on me. It's nice of people to like and post positive comments, but i just get embarrassed :blushing:
  • rolenthegreat
    rolenthegreat Posts: 78 Member
    I don't think it's rude to not comment/like things. Especially closed diaries.
    I almost never read people's food diaries but I do 'like' when they have been completed (regardless of whether or not they went over) because I feel like it's trying that counts. The way I see it even if someone goes way over they are still paying attention and logging which helps create better habits and will help them in the long run.
    I got a comment on my food diary the other day that was positive, but still threw me because I kinda forgot that people could read it?
    Not that I'm trying to hide my eating habits but I do still feel like food is very personal and it feels strange for someone on the internet to be analyzing it.
  • CSARdiver
    CSARdiver Posts: 6,257 Member
    Learned something new today and shut this notification down - thanks!

    I don't think its rude at all. Every now and then I'll check to see what my friends are up to and any cool recipes, but I'm not doing a deep dive.
  • Lillymoo01
    Lillymoo01 Posts: 2,868 Member
    Total noob question but how do you even access someone elses diary in the first place?
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 11,032 Member
    edited April 2017
    So here's a dissenting view: In my friend's list we seem to regularly look at each others' diaries and bring up to our friends' attention areas of note.

    I have gained at least 2-3 valuable insights that I wouldn't have caught on my own from comments made by friends including comments that without a level of friendship that tolerates debate (see added vs natural vs total sugar debates) might not have ended well; but, with a level of friendship that does tolerate debate were thought provoking and interesting.

    I also believe that on a few occasions suggestions or insights that I put forth were later explored and adopted by people on my friends list.

    We often also get ideas from each other, sometimes good (go bunnies! <i.e. extra fruits and vegetables>) and sometimes... just "interesting" (multiple people eating scones on the same day a few weeks ago was NOT a coincidence)

    I am not going to claim that it is easy to do. It is quite time consuming, and fraught with risk if the people in question are defensive, and not willing to examine and re-examine their habits and choices.

    But, since I don't pay a dietitian to review my habits and choices, having a few knowledgeable MFP friends do so is quite welcome!

    And hey, if I don't want the feedback I can always let them know that I am not interested in receiving feedback and/or unfriend them.

    As to the OP's question:

    Closed diary means no comment and i would would expect people with closed diaries to turn off the "I completed my day" notification. The exception being people who have announced they are struggling and have asked for support and who, invariably, get asked to confirm how close to target they got before being applauded.

    A not completed diary means no comment, the exception being people who I know well enough to know that they just forgot to complete (or friends I want to get a rise from :wink: )

    Completed diary is obviously an invitation to comment.

    Of course most of my friends have been on MFP for a long time and know that their notifications can be adjusted and the level of interaction all this entails means that my friends list has to remain small.
  • try2again
    try2again Posts: 3,564 Member
    edited April 2017
    Lillymoo01 wrote: »
    Total noob question but how do you even access someone elses diary in the first place?

    If a person's diary is open to the public, you can click on anyone's profile and a tab will come up to view their diary.
    What's mostly being discussed in this thread is when you have someone on your friends list and they complete their diary for the day, and they haven't adjusted their settings not to, you will get a notification on your news feed with a "view diary" link.