Are your partners supportive?

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  • Ironandwine69
    Ironandwine69 Posts: 2,432 Member
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    haymanchantal wrote: »
    b37h1klmtmou.jpeg


    He called me a whale

    I hope​ you're joking.
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,464 Member
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    Bex953172 wrote: »
    Are your partners supportive of your journey?

    My partner will help me by getting me the food I need in the house, not waving delicious treats in my face and will help me do exercises correctly to better myself.

    But I don't think he believes I'll actually be pretty skinny one day.
    I mean I'm a size 14-16 now and I want to be at a size 8-10 and I'm 5'7"
    I don't want to be like boney skinny but as slim as I can be without looking like I've gone too far? If that makes sense.

    I don't know if I just misunderstood him but I dunno
    Just made me think because he is supportive but I don't think he believes I can do it?

    It makes me sad that you are questioning his support. What more could you want than all the things you mentioned that he does for you? Do YOU believe you can/will do it? Just sayin.
  • Golbat
    Golbat Posts: 276 Member
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    My husband is wonderful. We've been together for a very long time and he's very supportive. I was very thin when we got married, but then my thyroid went bad and I had a couple of kids. I've taken off the majority of the weight I put on, but he never acted like he found me less attractive or felt like I had to lose weight, and he is at the same time supportive of my work to lose weight. I am confident he will love me and find me attractive no matter what happens in the future.

    Haymanchantal: You are not ugly, and you are not a whale, and that sounds emotionally abusive to me. I recommend counseling, if not for him then at least for you. If you can't afford counseling and you attend a church or other religious organization, you might be able to get help from a religious leader.
  • Onamissionforfit
    Onamissionforfit Posts: 90 Member
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    Very! Mine never judge me when I put on a lot of weight and has been awesome the entire fat loss journey. Lost 40 pounds now and still going. The real question is do you believe you can do it? You have to believe in yourself as well. He will come around when he starts seeing results and then you can say I told you so. Some people doubted I could do it as well feels good to show them.
  • Bex953172
    Bex953172 Posts: 4,079 Member
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    lorrpb wrote: »
    Bex953172 wrote: »
    Are your partners supportive of your journey?

    My partner will help me by getting me the food I need in the house, not waving delicious treats in my face and will help me do exercises correctly to better myself.

    But I don't think he believes I'll actually be pretty skinny one day.
    I mean I'm a size 14-16 now and I want to be at a size 8-10 and I'm 5'7"
    I don't want to be like boney skinny but as slim as I can be without looking like I've gone too far? If that makes sense.

    I don't know if I just misunderstood him but I dunno
    Just made me think because he is supportive but I don't think he believes I can do it?

    It makes me sad that you are questioning his support. What more could you want than all the things you mentioned that he does for you? Do YOU believe you can/will do it? Just sayin.

    Well I've thought about it..

    Physically he is supportive (getting me the right foods and helping with exercise)

    Emotionally he is not.

    But a journey like this is a physical and emotional one.

    Don't get me wrong I am happy with him because he's not just dismissed it entirely.

    And I am doing it for me.

    Either he's not emotionally supportive or he's secretly using reverse psychology to make me want to do it more and prove him wrong!

    @haymanchantal
    You are not fat or ugly!
    You're very very pretty!

    If you're the size of a whale then I wonder what whales your partner has seen!

    Is he just joking? Because my OH sometimes says it to me but as an obvious joke!
    But I just cal him a fat bast*** back and we laugh about it?
    If not then maybe that's a behaviour you should look into..
  • littlemcbird
    littlemcbird Posts: 11 Member
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    I don't feel like my husband is very supportive of me... but I think that's my fault with having started and stopped fitness so many times before. When I ask to train with him he can't be bother ect but if I'm about to eat something not that good for you he will tell me I shouldn't be eating that ?? So I'm not actually sure to be honest lol
  • haymanchantal
    haymanchantal Posts: 4 Member
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    Thanks girls I put it down to his faulty personality and trying to bring me down but it still makes me feel like crap dreading my holiday with him I'd rather go on my own and not feel judged on what I look like or feel like he's embarrassed by me at the end of the day he is not all that great himself although he thinks he's gods gift ha anyway onwards and upwards I don't need a man in my life I'm quite capable and independent with my 5 kids I've had a c section and a ectopic previously so have a horizontal scar from my belly button down and the c section scar too so get called jelly belly blah blah blah he bores me I told him to go find a skinny woman cos I'm not interested
  • Ni_La82
    Ni_La82 Posts: 16 Member
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    My husband tries but doesn't understand. It's either one extreme or the other.
    I did Lindora and the first day he brought home Popeyes fried chicken.
    Then he got over enthusiastic. When I started losing weight he told everyone I was on a diet (it was embarrassing) and he'd be irritated with me if I so much as looked at dessert. When I thought I was done he said I hadn't lost enough weight. I gave up about then. I'm ready to restart but I'm keeping him out of it.
  • Geocitiesuser
    Geocitiesuser Posts: 1,429 Member
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    My partner is dat boy in the mirror. Sometime he's a real kitten.
  • bhurley100
    bhurley100 Posts: 201 Member
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    I think your husband should love and support you no matter what you do in your fitness journey.
    My husband is happy to see me happy no matter what kind of workout or diet plan I want to do in my journey. He gets me set up so I can do what I want to do. He is amazingly supportive!!:-)
    Thats how it should be girl. Tell your man you would appreciate some encouragement and praise through this:-)
  • bhurley100
    bhurley100 Posts: 201 Member
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    haymanchantal wrote: »
    Thanks girls I put it down to his faulty personality and trying to bring me down but it still makes me feel like crap dreading my holiday with him I'd rather go on my own and not feel judged on what I look like or feel like he's embarrassed by me at the end of the day he is not all that great himself although he thinks he's gods gift ha anyway onwards and upwards I don't need a man in my life I'm quite capable and independent with my 5 kids I've had a c section and a ectopic previously so have a horizontal scar from my belly button down and the c section scar too so get called jelly belly blah blah blah he bores me I told him to go find a skinny woman cos I'm not interested

    You go girl!! Ditch that undeserving loser!! There is so much better out there. Do what fitness and exercise plan you want in your journey. This is for YOU. Theres plenty of online support when you need it.
  • vespiquenn
    vespiquenn Posts: 1,455 Member
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    Mine forced me to go to the gym despite crying that I didn't want to because my depression has completely overwhelmed me. And normally I don't miss a gym day even in the worst circumstances. So I knew he was trying to be supportive by ensuring I continued to do what I enjoy.

    In regards to eating.. well that can be hard at times because he likes eating out. But I manage.
  • texasfarmer
    texasfarmer Posts: 483 Member
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    haymanchantal wrote: »
    My boyfriend called me an ugly fat whale and when I go on holiday on the beach there will be no water left

    You need a new boyfriend! Why would you be with someone that talked to you like that? I'd rather be alone.
  • aganey
    aganey Posts: 501 Member
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    My husband is so unbelievably supportive of me. I'm 5'7 and 181 currently. My heaviest was 198. When we met I was 118 (dancer's body). He has worked out his whole life and is in such great shape. I tell him all the time that people probably look at us out and about and think "how did they end up together" because he's so fit and I'm just not. He tells me all the time that I am so mean to myself with the things I say about myself and that he loves me no matter what I look like. He actually prefers my curves better. He tells me all the time how proud of me he is and he doesn't want me to lose too much. I'm aiming for a healthy and toned 140. I feel like that would make me and him happy even though he tells me to do it for myself, not him. After all I am a mom of two and would like to just look like a healthy fit mom. He encourages me. We watch workout videos together. He listens when I talk about my struggles and offers advice. I couldn't have a more supportive man that I love.
  • wpg2mpls
    wpg2mpls Posts: 17 Member
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    My husband is generally very supportive- he loves to cook and is always open to trying new things with healthier ingredients. He has also started making an effort to eat better and exercise as well, which is a big change for a guy who can put away a dozen donuts without batting an eye (I've seen it!). The only issue I have with him is that he thinks I don't eat enough and will sometimes ask a bit too frequently what I've eaten and then comment that I should have more. He is 6'1 210lbs and I am 5'6 130lbs so he needs WAY more calories than I do and he also doesn't have a good sense of proper portions. I eat around 2000 calories a day which is totally reasonable but because his sense of portions is so skewed he assumes its a lot less than that. He also burns way more at the gym than I do so I think he is also overestimating my needs in that respect. I know he is just concerned that I am taking it too far but I wish he had a little more faith that I know what is right for my body.
  • Chef_Barbell
    Chef_Barbell Posts: 6,644 Member
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    vespiquenn wrote: »
    Mine forced me to go to the gym despite crying that I didn't want to because my depression has completely overwhelmed me. And normally I don't miss a gym day even in the worst circumstances. So I knew he was trying to be supportive by ensuring I continued to do what I enjoy.

    In regards to eating.. well that can be hard at times because he likes eating out. But I manage.

    This is just great. I need this.
  • Leah_62803
    Leah_62803 Posts: 292 Member
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    My husband isn't unsupportive... I don't know if I'd call him supportive though. He's part of the reason I gained weight. He spoils me and spoils me with food. He doesn't purposely sabotage me (I don't think) but he likes to surprise me with candy and sweets. Just food in general, anything he knows I like.
    He grew up in a family that just doesn't care about health or their weight. They are all extremely unhealthy and morbidly obese but make no effort to change at all. So it's been hard for him to notice or care. He's 6'3 and over 350 lbs. Occasionally he'll get on a kick and lose about 20 lbs or so but always goes back. I always fail too though so he probably doesn't feel like I take it seriously either.

    I do wish he was more supportive. I wish I was better for him too though. I don't know how to talk to him about food.
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
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    Super supportive. We met just after I lost weight 15 years ago. So he met me as slimmer me.
    He's always supported "my way" of eating.
    When menopause hit and the scale crept up a bit, he was wonderful.
    He couldn't be more supportive.
  • MichelleWithMoxie
    MichelleWithMoxie Posts: 1,818 Member
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    My husband is my biggest support system and my biggest inspiration. We're both into health and fitness, so we mesh wonderfully.
  • kimothy38
    kimothy38 Posts: 840 Member
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    Ni_La82 wrote: »
    My husband tries but doesn't understand. It's either one extreme or the other.
    I did Lindora and the first day he brought home Popeyes fried chicken.
    Then he got over enthusiastic. When I started losing weight he told everyone I was on a diet (it was embarrassing) and he'd be irritated with me if I so much as looked at dessert. When I thought I was done he said I hadn't lost enough weight. I gave up about then. I'm ready to restart but I'm keeping him out of it.
    I think this is kinda sweet. Maybe a bit clueless but good intentions.
    My hubby is super supportive so I can't fault him in that regard. When I'm on a bender though the last thing I need is him criticizing what I eat. I don't believe I need anyone's permission to eat whatever the heck I want.

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