I....am a Food Addict

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itsallgood803
itsallgood803 Posts: 133 Member
in Motivation and Support
I know I have a food addition, which is why I've ended up as heavy as I am today...although I am 12 lbs lighter since starting on here!

-I think about it all day, probably the way that most men think about sex all the time.
-I portion out my meals and try to be good, but then I cave at some point because when I deprive myself I go through emotional withdrawal.
-I eat poorly when upset or as a reward...really for any reason that I can justify.
-I get agitated and grumpy when I don't get the food that I want.
-I think about all the greasy salty foods that I'm missing and it makes me upset.
-I tend to eat more alone because I'm embarrassed to eat in front of people.
-I obsess about my weight and dieting
-I become depressed and feel horribly guilty when I eat something I shouldn't or overeat.

Replies

  • pinuplove
    pinuplove Posts: 12,874 Member
    edited April 2017
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    itsallgood803 wrote: »
    I know I have a food addition, which is why I've ended up as heavy as I am today...although I am 12 lbs lighter since starting on here!

    -I think about it all day, probably the way that most men think about sex all the time.
    -I portion out my meals and try to be good, but then I cave at some point because when I deprive myself I go through emotional withdrawal.
    -I eat poorly when upset or as a reward...really for any reason that I can justify.
    -I get agitated and grumpy when I don't get the food that I want.
    -I think about all the greasy salty foods that I'm missing and it makes me upset.
    -I tend to eat more alone because I'm embarrassed to eat in front of people.
    -I obsess about my weight and dieting
    -I become depressed and feel horribly guilty when I eat something I shouldn't or overeat.

    -I think about it all day, probably the way that most men think about sex all the time. I think about food a lot.
    What I already ate. What I'm going to eat. Menu planning next week. That, in and of itself, isn't an issue.

    -I portion out my meals and try to be good, but then I cave at some point because when I deprive myself I go through emotional withdrawal. Are you being overly restrictive? Eating too few calories? Not building in some of the foods you love in acceptable portions?

    -I eat poorly when upset or as a reward...really for any reason that I can justify. Consciously re-train yourself not to do this.

    -I get agitated and grumpy when I don't get the food that I want. So do I. That's why I build them into my plan.

    -I think about all the greasy salty foods that I'm missing and it makes me upset. See the second point

    -I tend to eat more alone because I'm embarrassed to eat in front of people. This is worrisome

    -I obsess about my weight and dieting Also worrisome. I would ask, is all this obsessing helping you meet your goals?

    -I become depressed and feel horribly guilty when I eat something I shouldn't or overeat. You need to separate food from your emotions. Food is fuel. Food is also enjoyable, and a means by which many of us facilitate socialization. Food is not bad.

    You would probably benefit from some professional counseling to address your feelings of guilt and embarrassment around food. Meanwhile, you can use the tools here at MFP to set a reasonable goal (choose maintenance until you get a handle on your feeling) and start logging your food. Every morsel that passes your lips doesn't have to be virtuous. Last night I ate french fries. This morning I logged a 0.8 lb loss for the week.
  • jessicagreen1828
    jessicagreen1828 Posts: 133 Member
    edited April 2017
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    You're in the right place. Logging should help you stay more accountable with yourself. Try journaling if you're dealing with emotions or call a friend. Drink 20oz of water or hot tea and wait 10-20 minutes to try and hold off on eating something outside your food goals. Try to distract yourself with an activity: walk, dishes, bath, book, puzzle, anything u like to do. Maybe try a deep breathing mindfulness exercise (YouTube has a lot of guides for this or download an app) Good luck!
  • Leah_62803
    Leah_62803 Posts: 292 Member
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    Just wanted to offer some support. Stick with and and listen to the advice you're given here.
    I can honestly relate to almost every single thing you listed.
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
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    check out OA.org see if there's a meeting near you. i'm doing OA as well as being on here (this is how I track, because i use If It Fits Your Macros) and it's a LOT of help.
  • Hearts_2015
    Hearts_2015 Posts: 12,031 Member
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    maab_connor wrote: »
    check out OA.org see if there's a meeting near you. i'm doing OA as well as being on here (this is how I track, because i use If It Fits Your Macros) and it's a LOT of help.

    I believe there's also a group or two on MFP in the groups area.
  • rbritt313
    rbritt313 Posts: 5 Member
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    First of all, Congratulations on losing 12 lbs! Starting a diet is always the hardest I think, so good for you!

    If you are feeling deprived maybe it's what you are or are not eating. You could be lacking something, like not enough protein in your diet so your body starts craving because it's needing something that its not getting. I would suggest talking to your Dr. about this to make sure there are no nutrition wholes in your diet.

    Thinking about food all the time.... Some suggestions that help me.

    1st If you want to give up a bad habit like "eating while watching TV "- which leads to eating junk food usually. You need to replace the bad habit with a good one. You if you are watching TV, instead of eating - maybe do a puzzle, crochet, draw, or color (they have many cool adult coloring books now). Or go for a walk or bowling, call a friend or relative, do something fun you enjoy.

    2nd: Maybe try going simple. I hate calculating all the calories for my meals... Even though my fitness pal app has made it easier then ever before. Sometimes I just want someone else to do the thinking for me.

    My mom and sister started the Jorge Cruise The 100 diet plan. And they have so far each lost 7 lbs. What I liked about it is in his book has it has 4 weeks of meals and snacks all done up for you (with a shopping list for each week). So you dont need to think about what your going to eat. So far I have I have lost 4.5 lbs on it and I'm not having any sugar cravings Like I thought I would or any salt cravings because I too love chips (you get to have baccon so I think that helps) :-) There is veriety, the food is tasty that you make and best of all it's easy. Maybe something like this would work for you?

    Hope this helps! Don't give up!
  • tracibrown2
    tracibrown2 Posts: 3 Member
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    It's comforting to see others like me. I find I often think about food, I think about what I'm going to eat when I get home. Sometimes I can't wait to get home so I can eat. It's crazy really. I often eat in private myself, or rather, the binge eating that I do, I tend to do in private. People don't usually see me binging, not even my gf. She has occasionally but I don't think to her it looks like a binge. It sucks and is really hard to overcome.
  • fiddletime
    fiddletime Posts: 1,862 Member
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    When I want to binge eat it's usually at night. If I don't have the yummy food around, I refuse to go buy it. If I have some left over food around, fattening, yummy foods, I can guarantee that it will NOT get eaten in moderation. It sucks. I wish I could have ONE piece of candy. My solution, not to have it around and not buy it. I do make an effort to eat yummy foods within my calorie count (but not my favorites, my second best). Hang in there. You're in the right place!
  • kimothy38
    kimothy38 Posts: 840 Member
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    Identify with every single thing you wrote. I did a 12 Step program for a year and lost 40kg. Then life got very difficult and I regained it all plus some. I learnt 2 things: I'm never doing a diet again & never ever give up hope.
    What works for me is to focus on the enjoyment of exercise coz I love feeling fit & strong, then the food part follows naturally. Focus on what you do want, not what you don't want.
  • sweet2def
    sweet2def Posts: 52 Member
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    the struggle is real...I recently weighed myself after a 3 week binge and I'm basically right back where I started, the 14lbs that took me two months to lose, all back. That has lit a fire up my butt. No going back, I'm honestly fed up of the cycle!
  • LKArgh
    LKArgh Posts: 5,179 Member
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    Therapy? I have found out helpful in the past for me (for different issues) and it can help a lot with developing strategies to cope with such problems.
  • RBBNKRHL
    RBBNKRHL Posts: 2 Member
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    I struggle with binge eating as well. I have found that meditation and mindfulness has helped me alot. I also like to read self help books and am going to therapy to help with underlying issues with anxiety, depression, PTSD, and other unresolved mental issues. I never wanted to admit I actually had any of these problems until I realized I needed more than just a diet to fix what was going on. So my advice is to first try to figure out what's compelling you to continue this cycle of
    distruction. You're not alone, it can be done, don't give up and try different things, eventually you'll find the right path for you.
  • amtyrell
    amtyrell Posts: 1,449 Member
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    Regarding rewards I used to eat. I have been rewarding myself very consciously by going to the living room and actually happy dancing I put on happy music and literally dance like a fool around my living room. Yes I might look silly but it is much better the eating a family sized bad of chips and it feels great and gets me away from kitchen. I recommend this strategy.
  • BLawyered
    BLawyered Posts: 32 Member
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    I really get it. I am hungry all the time. It doesn't even matter. I could have just finished a huge portion of my favorite meal and I'd still be hungry. In an hour after that, I'd be even hungrier yet. You need to talk to a doctor and/or therapist. And I need to take my own advice. But I will share with you the only thing that has ever relieved me from the mental anguish of always being hungry and therefore thinking about food all the time. Phentermine. It's a prescription appetite suppressant and it's the only way I've found thus far to get food to not consume my life. I know I can't take it forever and I have yet to find a long term solution but in the interim taking it at least makes me feel a little normal. I'm just telling you my experience, not saying you should do it. Good luck to you.
  • Gamliela
    Gamliela Posts: 2,468 Member
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    Glad you are here, logging calories helped me. I realized it starts with a thought. One little thought on some treat type food. Then desire, then the plan to get it etc. etc. For me I have to say 'no' to the first thought about any food that doesn't fit into my plan for the day. I got the food that is just too tempting out of my house and I have other things like cocoa and yogurt that I can eat instead. Stay here at MFP and read how other people have been successful, you can do it too.
  • alaskandelight
    alaskandelight Posts: 24 Member
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    @itsallgood803 like @BLawyered I used Phentermine for a period of time. It really does help cut the "distraction" of hunger and helps you focus on the science of nutrition. If you need to gain that knowledge, look into it. Someone changed my life when they asked me "how's the healing process going?" This really brought home that so many of my issues were related to emotional eating and that I really wasn't dealing with that at the time I was taking the RX. I was running on math (calories in/out), determination and results. That loaded question pretty much gave me a new orientation to not just lose weight for a healthy body, but to heal the connection between my mind, body, and spirit. I pretty much disassociated all three components of myself for a significant part of my life. Always hungry, but for what? Even today, I still don't have a solid answer to that. Just thinking about these issues and verbalizing them is a good thing. It's going to help you evaluate different situations and ask yourself difficult questions. I can relate to every point that you've listed and I can tell you that sometimes there are no answers to "why" you feel/think/do these things...or maybe the why was never in your control. (Like when I use to be mocked for eating salad, fair food, or just eating anything at all by complete strangers...that started my secret eating as a teenager and in college. >:-( People are jerks.) I did loose 130lbs in a healthy manner, but 50lbs slowly crept back over the past 2 and a half years. Since I've started again (-10 woot-woot), I feel like I'm relearning things, reprocessing. I'm not sure that I should ever stop. I slowly I let that self-awareness slip away and I don't have a healthy intuition with food. I need to always be mindful. Food will always bring me joy. I love to plan, shop, prepare, feed other, and feed myself. As many other have responded here, I am keeping food a key part of my life, but I'm mindfully placing higher value on the physical activities, hobbies, and relationships that bring me a different sort of comfort. Keep up the healing process, keep making observations, keep asking yourself questions, and just keep at it. You got this and you're worth it! <3

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