does this make me a jerk? Probably...
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I wouldn't have said anything. Two jerks don't make a nice person.
Agreed BUT would you rather they wear something uncomfortsable that doesn't fit because they have an unhealthy sense of competition, or something that fits and is flattering and actually does make them look smaller. Granted she could have said it as bit nicer, but I think its just as sinful to let someone walk around looking like a hot *kitten* mess when tactfully letting them know that they look like a hot *kitten* mess would save them the time of having to return pants that are obviously the wrong size.0 -
Your not a jerk. However you friend needs to realize that sizes vary by brand. Also, wearing your clothes that tight only makes you look bigger. Be glad that you are wearing an 8 and it fits comfortably. Go by Inches, not by clothing sizes.0
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just because you can "fit" into something doesn't mean you should [justsayin]
Completely agree!0 -
Perhaps *I* am the "jerk" here.. but since when is a size 6 something you brag about?0
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Perhaps *I* am the "jerk" here.. but since when is a size 6 something you brag about?
For those of use with bigger frames it is. I'm a size 10, goal is a size 8. Size 6 would probably be too skinny.0 -
Perhaps *I* am the "jerk" here.. but since when is a size 6 something you brag about?
Are you saying that a size 6 isn't an accomplishment that is brag worthy? I would hazzard to disagree, there is nothing wrong with a size 6, and it is completely note worthy. Until I got down to a size 2 I totally would have bragged about my 6's . . . but my 6's fit.0 -
Sounds as if she may be a bit jealous of your success to want to send you a pic like that and try to brag about being in a size smaller then you. It's complete rivalry all right.... on her part.0
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This brings back a memory. My husband and I went to a concert a few years back with some other people he worked with. (Free tickets from work.) Luckily our row was the last row on the first level, because one of the girls from work (who was very overweight) wore a pair of jeans that were WAY too small for her. I'm honestly not sure how she zipped them up, or how she sat in the car on the way there. She could not even sit all the way down in her seat. She had to stand the whole time! Good thing there wasn't another row of people behind us!!
I say tell her the truth!!0 -
Muffin top = ew.
NOT sexy.
This is why I'm a size 16 right now instead of a size 12 ^_^0 -
Ummm... no. You're not a jerk. She's a jerk for sending you that pic. You would be a jerk if you didn't tell her nicely not to buy them, yet.
that!0 -
I saw all kinds of women trying on "one piece" outfits at Aritzia earlier this month. I had to tell one woman to NOT buy it. Just cause it goes on, doesn't mean you look good in it!
She just looked at me like "skinny *****". LOL I just couldn't take it anymore. I had to say something!
There are lots of clothes that don't look good on me. I don't pretend they do and buy them!
Also, my husband is disguisted with the number of women wearing Yoga pants as an every day outfit. I am guilty also at times but never at work or anywhere of importance!0 -
Yeah, the also say "jealousy is a b!tch"0
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No, you're completely right. I don't consider the size a fit unless you can zip it, and it fits comfortably. If you have a huge muffin top spilling over, and can barely breathe, they don't fit, and that's not your size.
Women that go around with jeans that are two sizes too small with spillage going on everywhere baffle me. Do they not look in the mirror before they leave? And if they do, how can they honestly say "Yeah, I look damn good.", when they've got muffin top going out 5 inches from their body on either side?0 -
I just I am not a nice person I would have told her wow that looks great! bahaha! That way when she wore them out she would look like a complete idiot! But If she was my friend and wasnt trying to make me feel bad I would have told her the truth.. I know sad but true!0
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no your not a jerk, i never understood people who wear a smaller size,. talk about uncomfortable0
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Case in point...the skinny jean. I can't tell you how many people wear them that shouldn't. Just because you "fit" into something doesn't mean you should sport it in public. However, be the bigger person even if she isn't. :-)0
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Just realized I said "bigger" person....hopefully not taken the wrong way... What I meant was even though you are irritated with her, be the mature one. Some things you just have to let roll off your back.0
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I have a girlfriend that does this to me all the time. I don't think your answer was jerk-ish.0
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:0) Another clarification...I never said anything to her about it....only to ask to see the magnificent 6s when I was at her house and she said she didnt buy them---didnt want to spend the $$, not due to the size!
you guys all rock! thanks for the support!0 -
I completely agree!!!!
Plus, a person looks better if the clothes fit properly. She would probably look slimmer if she went up a size or two so everything smoothed out. Muffin top is not appropriate and it looks horrible. I will probably catch flack for saying this but when the zipper is about to bust open because you squeezed into the pants... Then they don't fit. End of story.0 -
Agree, sounds like she could be jealous. I really dont like when people are like, I'm a 2! Good for you, but can you sit in them? Sure I could fit in a 6, but 8's are more comfortable. Or when the sizes run big, New York and Co for example, I could wear an XS, and I am not XS.0
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That was not very nice. You probably hurt her feeling and hurt her self esteem. She sounded like she was really excited about being able to fit in a 6, forget the muffin top, just being in a 6 had to have been exciting. It sounded like she wanted you to give her some support rather than shoot her down. In my opionion, you really should apologize. :brokenheart: :sad:0
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If you read my last post just a few above yours, you would see that I didnt say anything to her....and that she wasnt trying to lose weight, she was just showing me her size was smaller than mine. the "jerkiness" was just something I thought and shared.That was not very nice. You probably hurt her feeling and hurt her self esteem. She sounded like she was really excited about being able to fit in a 6, forget the muffin top, just being in a 6 had to have been exciting. It sounded like she wanted you to give her some support rather than shoot her down. In my opionion, you really should apologize. :brokenheart: :sad:0 -
Just want to add something else--
Sizes are completely arbitrary. I could be a size 20 in one store and a size 12 in the next. What really matters is how healthy you are, inside and out. You're changing your life AND you're secure with yourself, which means guess what? YOU'RE WINNING. (you can just let her think she is
) 0 -
This goes to the fact that just because its "your" size dont mean you should wear it. If you can not comfortably sit down in a pair of jeans they are too small. Just my two cents worth.0
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No not a jerk. Let the comment and pic spurn you forward to losing even more weight. Besides muffins are for fat people.0
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No, I only read the first one. Glad you didn't say anything to her.0
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I have a "former friend" (she only considers me a friend when she needs something...aka help me clean my house, watch my cat I'm going on vacation, help me bathe my insane cat, etc...not a true friend right?) who is always oh I lost so much weight, and yes she has lost some weight, but (and I can't say a lot I have the whole "dunlap disease" myself) refuses to pull her pants over her gut...she pulls them up and zips then buttons/snaps them under her stomach and has the other just flop over,..it isn't attractive (we are both big women) but she is always rubbing it in how she's lost sooooooooo much weight.
As has been said they may "fit" but should you be wearing them? NO! Wear something that looks decent and fits properly. If you need to tone up do that, don't have the muffin or the dangle or the whatever you want to call it all flopping out, that isn't fitting...
Sorry for the rant...0 -
I wouldn't have said anything. Two jerks don't make a nice person.
This.0 -
Umm, as long as you didn't say that to her I don't think you're a jerk. Making a comment like that is how my friends and I joke with each other so I'm not sure if you and her have a similar sense of humor as me and my friends do.
What I do find "jerk-ish" is the fact that you are taking her excitement with fitting in a smaller size than you, as something to compete with and want to knock her down for it (even if in your mind). I just don't think in that manner. If someone I care about is excited about something (anything) I share that joy. I don't focus on the details which make that victory not as accurate as she says.
But that's just me. Good job on fitting into a size 8 recently!0
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