Motivation, Success and Frustration Sharing!

clicketykeys wrote: »

Think the eval went well. However, we've apparently had a leak in our roof for awhile. Had a chunk of ceiling fall down last night. No idea how far it goes. *sigh* Feels like there's always one more thing, you know?

Oh how I agree with you @clicketykeys . I feel like there's always one more thing in life. You solve one problem and then there's another one right after! DH missed some work last pay period and totally screwed up the budget but I junked my really old car and got the money to cover the difference so that's one problem solved at least! Hopefully you can fix your roof without much of a hassle!

And congrats on the good evaluation! That must have felt good!

Just a quick stop in. Had a pretty good weekend. Had a blast doing my 7k. The drive there and back was gorgeous. The 7k was in this smallish town. High elevation 8k feet. Lots of hills. I beat my time by 3 minutes. Super excited, I am expecting the next one will be even better.

@Rachel0778 I've heard of HaloTop but never actually invested any thought into it. I think I will now! Lol. But for right now, I'm pretty hooked on organic all natural chunky strawberry fruit bars. Super delicious! The convenience store about two miles away sells a not as healthy but still not bad version of the ones I have in my freezer, so on the days I walk, if it's really hot out, I'll walk there and pick one up as my treat for making it there and eating on my way back home. Lol.

I havent been out on a walk in a few days, I went for a bike ride yesterday and got caught in a freak rain storm a few miles away from home. I got home and I was soaked and freezing! Lol. But I think it's supposed to be decent tomorrow and DH works later then I do, so I may get one in before he gets home. Lol. He's in bad shape physically due to a reckless youth and he cant keep up with me when I walk. He was the one that got the bike and he thinks that that might be less stress on his joints and his body over all. So we'll see how that goes. Lol

Today would have been a GREAT day if I had been in a better mood. I suffer from manic-depression(aka Bi-Polar disorder) and have severe anxiety attacks as well. I'm medicated and mostly stable and have great support from DH, my family and my friends, but for some reason, today was nothing but anxiety and franticness all day at work. I had to take on of my emergency meds right about the time I clocked in and felt like I needed another 3 hours later but didnt take it because I've never taken two of them so close together and I didnt want to try that while I was still at work handling peoples money. Lol. It carried all the way home. I was on the verge of tears on the drive home because it took me like fifteen minutes longer then usual and I was just in a terrible head space all night at home. DH had no idea what to do and I couldnt even tell him what I needed because I didnt even know. Eventually I decided to take a super hot shower(that's my go-to during emotional crisis) and was on the verge of tears as I was climbing in, but it did the trick. It got me(for the most part) out of my funk and I was able to finish the night on a high note. I'm still not competely myself, but I'm hoping a good night's sleep does that for me. And honestly, just typing this out and getting it out on paper is relieving my mind as well. Lol

But, through it all, I paid close attention to my "Full Meter" when I was eating dinner because I didnt want to stuff myself so full that I felt uncomfortable. I didnt want to whatever this was to cause me to over eat out of emotional crisis, which I have done in the past. I wanted to make sure I didnt do that this time. And it was a success! I ate my dinner, had a two cup serving of healthy popcorn and a fruit bar and am feeling much much better, and stayed in the green for almost everything even without logging any exercises.

So now it's bed time. I cant wait. Lol. Anxiety wears me out. I've been exhausted all day. I've been looking forward to bedtime for most of the evening. But I didnt want to go to bed without first checking in with my peeps! Lol

Have a great night everyone!

@melaniedscott You are amazing, always helping the in laws out. For your scalloped potatoes I would by the box and do it that way. (I am lazy.) The 7k is a football thing, out greatest QB, and now GM of our pro team was #7. It is for the teams charity. They normally do one a year. This year they expanded to do 3 in different areas of the state. The next one is in June, and I am going to try and run some of it.

@HGSmith0920 Wow, great job handling the anxiety. I have days like that, and love the shower. IT seems to help a lot.

@rachel0778 You can do this. How is the competition going with the spouse? You are doing great, think about you were when you first started this journey. Would you have been this conscience of what you are eating, would you at least made an attempt to eliminate all the excess calories, or would you have pigged out, ate what you wanted and as much as you wanted? You are so much more aware of what you are doing, and sometimes we have to take standing still as progress. You are creating a healthy you, and learning to deal with making different choices.

I had a decent day yesterday, stayed under calories, an hour at the gym. missed my step goal, but oh so close.

Boy what a difference a night makes! After I posted here last night, I put on a sermon from one of my favorite speakers and played mah jong on my tablet while I listened to it and just let my spirit quiet down and rest and boy did it help! The DH was great too! He knows that when I get frantic and anxious like that to just leave me alone. He knows what I needed better than I do. Lol. So I sat in the bedroom and just kept quiet while he was in the living room with his headphones on and the TV on silent while he played on his XBox. After about an hour I felt soo much better. I felt like I could breathe and think clearly again. I got up and hugged the DH and turned out the light and went to sleep. I slept like a baby too. I dont even think I woke up when the DH came to bed! And I've been in a great mood ever since! Woke up feeling fabulous today, had a great day at work. I drank the last of my beer last night and have no intentions of buying more for a while since I drink the flavored beer and they're very high in calories and sugar. So I still have like 800 calories left for the night so I think I might have two helpings at dinner tonight! Lol.

I'm off tomorrow as well! Have a psychiatry appointment in the morning that the DH is going to come with me to because he sees my mood shifts so much better than I do. He can give the doctor better insights into my well being than I can. That's a rough part of my disorder. I dont realize just how unstable I am until I'm suicidal or havent slept for a week. DH is much better at picking up on my fluctuations than I am. Most of the time he works when I have my appoinments but he actually closes his store tomorrow so he can come! Lol. With what happened yesterday I'm glad he can.

Havent really been on the exercise train recently. So hopefully tomorrow I can fix that! I dont have much to do after the appointment so I think I'm gonna take a nice walk and then do a kettlebell workout in the nice weather. Give it a change of pace. Lol. I've never been one to do much strength training but I keep hearing people say that it's a good thing, and I've read some articles here on the MFP blog. So I guess I'll give it a try!

Anyway! Sorry for the rambling!
Have a great night everyone!

You are all so open & I usually am, but I got into a quiet angry mood Sunday at something DH said. It was an incident that used to go on frequently but hasn't because he has been working on it for a long time. I think it effected me so much because I was SO tired from the Thursday before, I worked TOO hard at our animal rescue. I felt so good I kept working hard but it did a number on me. I laid in bed all day Friday & I'm just starting to feel better today...Tuesday. It also aggravated my tendonitis in my hands which haven't bothered me in a long time. I did go in Saturday, but it was fine. I showed potential adopters dogs & stayed for 1 1/2 hrs, no hard work. Cooked over one of our son's house on Sunday, since he always cooks for us. I've been so groggy since Friday. I'm not doing that again...lifting heavy wooden chairs & large crates.

@jdelaroy Sounds like a great day yesterday! I am winning the challenge against my SO Sadly, I barely remember a time before I was conscientious of calories. I think I started Weight Watchers when I was 16. When I pigged out I knew what I was doing but I'd do it anyways

@Evamutt Sorry to hear about the incident with your husband. I'm glad to hear he's working hard on it and that you planned a more relaxing day at the animal rescue to recover

@HGSmith0920 I'm glad to hear you're feeling more stable. Your SO sounds like a great support system. It's wonderful he's able to make the flexibility to join you in your therapy appointment!

@bluepoppies777 Welcome back, we missed you! 5lbs is frustrating (I'm in the same boat) but we can absolutely tackle them this summer! Summer is a hard time for weight loss for me as well because it is always so busy with fun plans (not that I'm complaining!) I tentatively pre-tracked the weekend events to give me a structure to go off of. I hope work quiets down for you soon!

Yesterday evening ended up being a blast. Instead of derby practice, we went trail skating on one of the local trails. It wasn't an intense workout, but I did feel it in my core this morning and it was super fun! Today instead of pole class I decided to do a strength workout at home and walk the dog tonight since I'll be gone for a good chunk of the weekend and want a night out to enjoy the weather. I also downloaded some new library books that I want to dig into. Whoever evented the electronic library system deserves a hug!

Work is feeding me today, but after a few days on plan (and turning down ice cream last night) I'm feeling more in control. Plus, I reminded myself that all of my eating out this weekend is with my Mom and she's a light eater so any going off plan will be my fault!

GAH!!! I just wrote out a whole bunch of replies and my computer decided to reboot so I lost it all! So lets try this again!

@jdelaroy YAY!!! That's so exciting about your time! I'm so proud of you! Dont cry! As for telling people on facebook about your journey, I didnt tell anyone on Facebook about when I quit smoking for about 6 months into it . I had quit and failed so many times in the past that I didnt want the eye rolls and the yeah rights to derail my progress. My closest friends knew but not the general public. I'd say, if you're up to telling them and getting potential flack and it wont derail your efforts, then go for it! And BTW, congratulations on all the inches you've lost!!!!

@Rachel0778 A trail skate sounds like a blast! I think I would love that! Maybe one day Lol! I just started a new job a few weeks ago that has great earning potential in sales(though it's not required) but I've never really done sales or been comfortable with the idea of it, so I took a bunch of books out of my lending library on selling tips and tricks for beginners, so we'll see how that works out. And I'm glad you are getting a little more control over your meals. That has to be really hard, not really having control over anything that's being served to you.

@Evamutt I'm sorry that your DH said something hurtful. Sometimes the people closest too us can hurt us the most. My DH, although super supportive, has a temper. It's way better than when we first started dating, but some of it is still there. Hopefully it is easily forgotten and forgiven and doesnt undo all the hard work he's put in over the years!

As for me, today was my weigh day! I can happily say that I am down another 4 lbs! That's 9lbs in two weeks! And really it's nothing more than not putting so much crap in my stomach. I've been doing the occasional long walk and the occasional bike ride, but nothing too drastic and it's paying off. I've even found that eating the way I am now, isnt too difficult. I still treat myself to popcorn and strawberry fruit bars after dinner. But everything else I've been eating is clean, or close to clean and yummy! I eat a lot of fruit and a decent amount of nuts. And that'll keep me full for most of the work day, until dinner time. Lots of water and a cup of tea or two as well. I try to limit myself to 2 cups of coffee a day, though, today I had 3. Lol

But I am finding this much easier to do this time around, I think because I was just so sick of seeing myself in the mirror and going, WTF happened to me? 10 years ago, I barely weighed a 100lbs , up until 2 weeks ago I was almost pushing 200. But as I start to fit in my clothes better it's been a major confidence booster!

@rachel0778 I love the variety of exercise and activities you have planned. Glad your weekend out won't be as stressful as you were thinking it was going to be.

@HGSmith0920 They would have been tears of joy and happiness. I am a big baby, I cry all the time. Thanks for the advice about FB. I will keep it in mind. Congratulations on all the weight loss so far. I hope it continues to be easy for you.

@evamutt I am so glad you are starting to feel better and glad we could be here to listen to your not so great days. It is so wonderful to have a safe place to just be whatever, and feel whatever you are feeling.

I gave up on the no sugar this week. ToM is just stronger than I am this time. I will try it again in the near future. I may have lost this battle, but the war is far from over. I had an okay day hitting my goals. I tried running on the treadmill for the first time ever. Holy Crap did it kick my bum. I was only able to run about 3 minutes, but that was 3 minutes more than I have ever done before. I did run (Slow as f run.) at lunch for 28 minutes. My next 7 k is in a little less than a month. I want to be able to try and run for at least 1 mile. The 7 K in September I want to be able to run the whole thing. (4.2 miles) I need to start working on my endurance.

Tonight is roller skating night. I really want new skates.

Rachel - you always do such fun activities! I don't even know what trail skating is, but I think I would like it! LOL I am also a big reader, but I love to read the real book, not an electronic one. Although every time we go on a trip, I download audiobooks and we listen to them (can't read in the car due to motion sickness!).

Jen - good for you for losing those inches, that is amazing! You are doing great! and high fives all around for your time in that 7 km race! Fab!!

Eva - Glad that you are more rested and feeling better. I haven't done water aerobics in maybe a decade or 2? LOL! Would be a good work out for sure!

HGSmith - good job on your loss, 9 lbs in 2 weeks is a lot! glad you have the support of your hubs.

Speaking of hubs, it's my hub's birthday today! We are going out to a really nice dinner tomorrow night to celebrate. (I'm going to try to behave and I will be the DD so he can enjoy a few drinks). We were planning on doing some fun things this weekend for his bday/mother's day like going 4x4'ing in the jeep with the top off, and hiking or cruiser biking, but the weather is calling for rain, rain and more RAIN. GAHHHH! I painted my toenails and am wearing a new bright orange pretty top today, trying to will the summer to get here. (Didn't work - LOL!)

If I don't log on tomorrow, I'm wishing everyone a happy Mother's Day (even for your cute fur babies)! xo