Severe binge eaters .. How did you do it?
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jla2425
Posts: 67 Member
Looking for guidance and genuine advice from someone who knows what its like yo be so stuffed full but still eat. Someone who eats in secrecies and hides food. Someone who cant stop obsessing over there next meal when trying to eat calorie appropriate. I have been struggling for years. I am now up 30lbs in the last few months. Desperate for advice and help. Just quit doesnt work. So please no rude comments from people who dont understand.
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Replies
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I typed a long response and my browser reloaded2
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You aren't alone and you can be helped. I used a therapist to help me recover. OA is also a good group and it's free. The eating was about my feelings. I had bulimia. There is hope.7
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Hypnosis. I use free videos on youtube. My favorite is the sleep hypnosis. You just put it on and go to sleep with it playing. Works really well for me3
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I totally empathise. I would plan my eating so it wasn't in front of anyone. I'd eat a whole packet of something and then replace it before someone noticed. I've not tried hypnosis - that sounds interesting. I did a 12 step program similar to OA for 9 months and lost 40 kg, but life didn't suddenly improve once I lost the weight. Same low self confidence, just a different weight.
I regained all the weight and then lost 20 kg, then regained that and am now on my back down again.
Food restriction doesn't work at all for me because I still obsess about food, from the minute I get up.
Rather than focusing on what I don't want, I focus on what I do want, which is to be fit, healthy and happy.
I was fortunate enough to meet a personal trainer when I was at my lowest ebb which reignited a tiny spark.
I'm in such a different mindset now than I was 6 months ago. I focus on going to the gym (personal training, weight training and cardio classes), make sure I get enough sleep, try to eat nourishing food but have treats when I want them.
I'm soooooo much happier now, probably overeat once a week (sometimes eyes are still bigger than stomach), and have lost 10+kg.
Never, ever, give up hope.10 -
Have you been able to establish a pattern to your bingeing? Any particular times of day/ triggers/ food types? Do you still record it all when you do binge? Don't beat yourself up over it- we're all here to get healthier and happier.2
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I've heard of people being able to control their binges with intermediate fasting where they eat very little calories one day and many calories the next day that way people that are volume eaters don't feel so restricted. They go by weekly goal calories instead of daily.3
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If you can, address the emotions behind the desire to eat. Find a different way to cope. Life is tough! You're not alone. Nourish yourself with healthy foods and lots of love. You are worth it!
Unhappiness is the first sign that something powerful stirs inside of you. A sign that it's time to change. Grow. For the better.
Advice someone gave me that clicked with me was that this is all a mental game, and I was allowing my mind to go down this rabbit hole and focus only on food and getting that fix. I needed to stop my mind from going down that path in the first place. Focus on the present. Whenever I start thinking about overeating or buying a bunch of unhealthy food to eat, I try to look in the mirror. And I think the person you see there matters. The person you see there deserves healthy satisfying food. That person doesn't need to be stuffed. That person knows eating is not the answer. That person is worthy of love and having the life she imagined. Go for a walk. Write down what's really bothering you. Make other plans to do things you enjoy besides eating. Spend time with people who nourish your soul and uplift your spirits.
Sometimes I overeat when all I really need is a hug, so I'm sending lots of hugs your way.
*Hugs*12 -
Things that might help when you're thinking of overeating might be things that will change your focus away from food.
Maybe drink 2 glasses of water when you think about over eating. That usually makes me feel refreshed, refocused, and reconsider whatever I might be about to do.
Create healthy Habits. Binge eating has probably become a habit, so maybe slowly create habits that don't involve binge eating that work for you.
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I never hid any foods to be honest. However, I used to do it in secrecy. I stopped in January and had relapsed only one time 2-3 weeks ago. If you stop and relapse don't beat yourself over it. The moment you stop is already a new moment. The binge is now part of the past.
What helped me was my thoughts. I told myself I'd rather be 4 kg more and not binge rather than binge and then "purge" with eating too little or sometimes I'd throw up. On the practical level, focus on something else like a hobby. Avoid having sweets and whatever triggers you in the first days at home. If you're like me and have other people around your home, tell them to hide it. I used the excuse of wanting to get fit. Now, I can have the sweets more or less around but I won't binge on them (except that one relapse I mentioned). If the cravings get too harsh on you, take a walk or/and write your feelings down. Observe your emotions but get unstuck from them.
Put your mental state first and fitness goals on the side for a moment. Oh and another mindset tip: think food is food no matter if it is nutella on bread or carrot-cabbage salad. Drink more water to feel fuller and to have something on your mouth. Coffee and tea work well for me as well.
What I found myself doing after the relapse is that I didn't purge at all in any shape or form. I treated this binge as part of the past and the guilt didn't last. If I can do it then you can do it! And lots of people have successfully quit! You own your life and you can do it5 -
I'm the same way with my binge eating disorder. I haven't exactly found success yet, but there are groups on here for it to talk to other people who struggle with it.2
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Try to identify your food restrictions when you are not bingeing, are they the things you binge on? dont call it your 'diet' or 'healthy eating' because ultimatley what we crave is something we eliminate. Your body might need a little more of that - spread out strategically throughout the day, rather than one big feast at the end? For me it was animal fats, either as milk, butter or cream - once I stopped training due to injury - I couldnt get enough of those foods - I didnt think I was being restrictive at the time but really I was.
Its the mental game, of seeing those foods as ok in the right quantity, and at any time they fit your needs, if you really want something sweet / crunchy/ salty / creamy etc and excessivley or constantly delay the gratification then it will have the rubber band effect. Instead incorporate it with your next nutrition intake in a healthy proportion as a complete meal / snack of complex carb/ protein and healhy fat.
Ways to help 'eat until satisfied, not until full' : slow down, chew mindfully, use cutlery in your non dominant hand, or try chopsticks, turn off distractions, and pay attention to how much food you need to progress through your "hunger scale" (google this) portion out your serving size, "eating is finished" mantra - then get up go into another room or do something different, but most importantly ; stop often and Smile: Because eating should be a wholesome enjoyable experience, that we needent feel guilty about, even when its occasionally indulgent. Persistence not perfection. Good luck, for us all, as we are all on an imperfect journey to be a better version of ourselves, as joy to be shared with others.xo3 -
I started distance running to deal with the calories from binge eating4
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If you have an iPhone or iPad and use podcasts app, there is a great podcast to check out. "Weight Loss Made Real" by Cookie Rosenblum. She take a lot about binging and how to overcome it. Start back at the beginning of the podcast and listen through. Very insightful info.6
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I have struggled with this most of my life. In the last year I finally found a health coach to assist me with this. First the focus was restructuring my food intake. We focused on me having quality food such as veggies, healthy fat and protein at every meal. This allows me to feel satisfied. The second biggest part of this is emotions. I have found when I go through situational personal issues whether it be depression, or stress is when I lose my ability to stay focus on eating well and eat from emotion which further leads to major binges. Lastly, the key for me is being prepared, and knowing my triggers. Just last week I made Brownies for Teachers appreciation Luncheon. never again, I ate a third of the pan. My intent was to only try one. I am a sugar addict and sugar craves sugar. I 100% agree with the research in sugar addiction as that is me no matter what frame of mind I am in.
I will continue to battle binges, but I feel more in control now because of what I mentioned above. If I am going through an emotional issue I try to schedule with my therapist, tap into my faith, immerse myself in inspirational quotes. Whatever it is that can help me.
I hope this helps you in someway. I remember for the last two years that I would search in the community forum to find information about binging and to feel relatable to someone.. At first i thought I just didn't have will power, but again once I started educating and taking care of myself I realized that there were many different factors at play.4 -
I can empathize, I was bulimic for 10 years. Now I am heathy and happy and reasonably fit (had a baby this year). What worked for me was -
- Prozac
- Therapy (I saw both a dietician and a licensed social worker)
- Giving up dieting for several years
- Finding an physical activities I really loved so exercise felt fun and not like punishment. For me road cycling.
- Letting go of the all or nothing / good food bad good mentality
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I strongly recommend looking at the underlying mental issues your suffering. For me, I realized I held onto the fat for so many years and binged at every chance because it gave me an excuse as to why my dad hates me. I was able to justify his abuse and cruelty by coupling it with being fat. (It was the biggest strain in our relationship) he dieted me all the time growing up and even starved me at one point cause I was so fat. I got rid of him. One day just had enough and kicked him out of my life. I didn't have an excuse anymore. I started focusing on bad habits and changing them one by one. Today I'm 287lbs, large but afar cry from the 363 I once was! I'm still loosing and don't have anymore excuses! You can do it!9
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I would eat so much I would get sick. I would literally throw up from eating so much. Did that stop me? Of course not, I would just get back to eating. The groceries I bought on Sunday generally were gone by Wednesday. The more I bought, the more I ate. While at work all I would do is think about stopping off on the way home, getting a pizza, chips, Doritos and a 12 pack of beer so I could sit and watch a movie while I ate everything. I would sit and stare at the clock waiting for the time I could leave to get my food, get home, and eat. Everybody at the local convenience store knew me by name because I was in there pretty near everyday buying chips, beer, Mac & Cheese, whatever I was craving that day. When I tried to change my habits, I would cut out all of that food and I would do okay for a few weeks, and then something would happen, often some little thing in my life, that I would use as a reason to revert back to my prior habits. When size 40 inch pants were barely fitting, I actually had to leave them unbuttoned and then cover that up with my belt, I knew I had to do something. I focused on my exercising and my diet followed. When I had that craving to revert back to my old eating habits, I would think about how many calories I would consume, and how many hours exercising it would take to burn those calories. I still eat chips, nachos, and gluten free mac & cheese, along with the other foods I love, but now I eat one, or sometime two servings, max. Completely cutting out the foods I loved only made me crave them more, and now I see I was simply setting myself up for failure. What I do now is allow myself one or two servings while staying under my caloric intake goal. I also don't watch TV while I eat.4
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I started working out more and it helped with my cravings. I also hung up pictures of how I used to look by my fridge and threw out all of my sauces like ketchup and mayo ranch etc. you can be snacking on something healthy and those things just add so many calories without you even realizing it2
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Wow i am just so grateful for all of your responses. I feel so hopeful. Binge eating runs in my family but isnt a concern for others except myself. I see my mother paying severely and my younger siblings with obesity and health issues. I so badly want to gain some control over my eating so that i can be healthier when im my moms age. Thank you all. Im so blessed by the advice and thoughtful time you took to reply.7
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I make sure that I have snacks on hand like cheese & fruit. I try to log everything when I get the binge urge. I also try to drive to and from work on a route that had none of my stops. I also know that if I don't have something sweet I will obsess over it so I try to have little chocolates, and I try to limit myself to so many a day. This does not always work, but knowing there is an issue and trying is half the battle.
Honestly being diagnosed with celiac has helped me a lot too, because a whole area of food out there is off limits, and when I think ... maybe I could have this (insert something a celiac can't have but is so good) I say to myself the after effects of pain, mood swings and diarrhea etc are just not worth it. The worst time for me is when my bf is away and I'm by myself, but I try and try and try.3
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