We broke up because...
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She enjoyed another guy's meat (and meat by-products).0
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he didn't let me have my tarantula0
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She sang in her sleep0
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He snored so loud it woke the next door neighbor down the street up0
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and it was me!1
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It was my stunt double, sorry..0
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She has failed repeatedly to bring the intensity and alacrity...juuuusf sayin....0
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He didn't like being called Mr. Anderson.
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He was too mysterious .. I couldn't trust him0
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Who could break up with you???0
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I liked a little mystery, she didn't.0
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He loved another0
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She moved to Cairns0
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He kept talking about Karen or something. I wasn't listening.0
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Insisted i call him Karen0
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wouldn't welcome the baldness!0
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Thought he was balding and wore a toupe1
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She wore a merkin ...
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She wanted me to dress like a garden gnome0
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He was always worried about being mistaken as a Gnome0
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He kept wearing his mankini out to dinner0
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Kept showing everyone his helicopter technique0
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Her tongue lashings were brutal.1
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Didn't like real lashings0
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she was too sensitive0
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She always said I was a pain.0
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He took it otherwise0
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she didn't like me flashing her friends0
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