Family is no help!
Oriel94
Posts: 22 Member
Hi everyone! I really need to know how you guys got started and we're able to stay on track when your family refuses to buy food that you could eat. I'm a recent college graduate and currently unemployed so I am taking this time to work on myself until God opens a door for me. Therefore, food in the house is totally up to my family. Any suggestions?
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Replies
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I know that it can be tougher to stay on track if you're eating foods you don't necessarily feel good about but it is possible to stay in a deficit with any food! Just cut portions/possibly get a food scale to weigh.Hi everyone! I really need to know how you guys got started and we're able to stay on track when your family refuses to buy food that you could eat. I'm a recent college graduate and currently unemployed so I am taking this time to work on myself until God opens a door for me. Therefore, food in the house is totally up to my family. Any suggestions?
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Seeing as you're unemployed why don't you offer to help by shopping and cooking sometimes?12
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I haven't changed the foods that I eat in my journey I just changed how much I was eating. I would highly recommend purchasing a food scale ($10-$15 on amazon) . Maybe try to up the water and try not to drink your calories that should help cut some more calories. Feel free to add me!6
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It is not their job to help it is you who needs to lead the charge for your own health. Get a job any job even not the ideal job continue to search for ideal and buy the groceries you want. One hard reality of life is you are responsible for you.7
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Hi!! Definitely is tough, but doable! Try to make sure you eat the recommended serving size, eat in portions, and if it is a whole meal of things put together (stew, sandwiches) try as best as you can to dissect the foods and log them in separately...example
"Homemade: Beef Stew" <--- isn't going to tell you how many calories are in it, they could be wayyy over or waayy less.
Also, if you do end up eating stuff that is "bad" or too much, walking or doing exercise can give you more calories for the day!
So try logging the food separately instead of clumping it together. Hope this helped!
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Could you be a bit more precise: what is your family cooking and what is missing? You do not need diet food to loose weight, however vegetables and fresh fruit are definitely helpful. But as vnb_208 said, portion size and avoiding liquid calories are a big part of the equation. Whatever you do, do NOT look at it as "dieting", i.e. a punishment limited in time, but commit to changing your eating habits for good.2
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You still control *how much* of the food you eat. You can lose weight eating junk food if you have to, but you have to control your portions. If you seriously have no control over what they feed you, then take charge of *how much* of it you eat (or don't eat.)2
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You can stick with portioning the main dish, and just request a different side (i.e. asparagus vs rice). But don't make your family do everything. If you're not working, then you can go grocery shopping with them (or go on your own), and pick/cook what you want to eat. Better yet, make "healthier" versions of their favorite meals. Coming from a similar situation (not working due to health), take this time to really learn how to cook. It will suck at first if you're not a cook to begin with, but keep it simple, and it will be fun to experiment!1
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Hey It's awesome that you are wanting to make some changes in your life!
I agree with a lot of the suggestions you've already gotten, such as,
>Smaller Portions
>Offering to help with shopping/cooking/cleaning
>Finding a part time job
However, I'd also suggest you talk with your family. I don't know who you live with, but for example, if It's your mom, maybe talk to her about your goals, ask her (or anyone in your family) if they'd like to join you on your journey.
Communication is so important.
Best of luck, and if you'd like to support each other, please add me as a friend! 3 -
TavistockToad wrote: »Seeing as you're unemployed why don't you offer to help by shopping and cooking sometimes?
I actually do all the cooking right now because my grandparents are sick.3 -
You can stick with portioning the main dish, and just request a different side (i.e. asparagus vs rice). But don't make your family do everything. If you're not working, then you can go grocery shopping with them (or go on your own), and pick/cook what you want to eat. Better yet, make "healthier" versions of their favorite meals. Coming from a similar situation (not working due to health), take this time to really learn how to cook. It will suck at first if you're not a cook to begin with, but keep it simple, and it will be fun to experiment!
I do all the cooking in the house, but we are from the south where everything is either smothered or fried and they refuse to eat it any other way lol0 -
I'm thinking you could take all the above advice and also consider something that worked great for me.
Intermittent fasting. Eat normally one day and fast the next day. Repeat for the rest of your life.
That way you won't need to worry so much about the specific groceries and foods you eat everyday and your body will have enough time to digest all the food you do throw in
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Could you be a bit more precise: what is your family cooking and what is missing? You do not need diet food to loose weight, however vegetables and fresh fruit are definitely helpful. But as vnb_208 said, portion size and avoiding liquid calories are a big part of the equation. Whatever you do, do NOT look at it as "dieting", i.e. a punishment limited in time, but commit to changing your eating habits for good.
Well I am trying to take red meat and fried food out of my diet. I have already discontinued rice from my diet but I love bread and sweets so I am trying to wean myself off of them. However my family continues to request red meat, fried food, and sweets. They are on a fixed income so it is expensive to try and cook two different dinners daily.0 -
You can stick with portioning the main dish, and just request a different side (i.e. asparagus vs rice). But don't make your family do everything. If you're not working, then you can go grocery shopping with them (or go on your own), and pick/cook what you want to eat. Better yet, make "healthier" versions of their favorite meals. Coming from a similar situation (not working due to health), take this time to really learn how to cook. It will suck at first if you're not a cook to begin with, but keep it simple, and it will be fun to experiment!
I do all the cooking in the house, but we are from the south where everything is either smothered or fried and they refuse to eat it any other way lol
That is the beauty of being the cook, they get what you give them
But since it sounds like you don't want to rock that boat, just make a healthier option for yourself, or eat a little bit of what they are eating but make the bulk of your meal veggies. So if you cook fried chicken for the family then bake or pan cook some for yourself. Or just eat a piece of friend chicken with a big salad.
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You can stick with portioning the main dish, and just request a different side (i.e. asparagus vs rice). But don't make your family do everything. If you're not working, then you can go grocery shopping with them (or go on your own), and pick/cook what you want to eat. Better yet, make "healthier" versions of their favorite meals. Coming from a similar situation (not working due to health), take this time to really learn how to cook. It will suck at first if you're not a cook to begin with, but keep it simple, and it will be fun to experiment!
I do all the cooking in the house, but we are from the south where everything is either smothered or fried and they refuse to eat it any other way lol
I live in the south and not EVERYTHING is smothered or fried. This is a false statement.1 -
I do all the cooking in the house, but we are from the south where everything is either smothered or fried and they refuse to eat it any other way lol
I can relate to that! lol
Since you are the one cooking, perhaps you can set aside portions for yourself that you fix in a different manner or maybe find a way to lighten up the meals?
For example: you might be able to try to make oven-fried chicken instead of pan fried to save on grease or you could set aside your portion of the chicken meat and bake it while you fry what the others want.
If you are doing the grocery shopping, you can sneak in 1% or skim milk and use that to make the mashed potatoes, and then skip the gravy yourself. For breakfast, you might find a way to lighten up the gravy or just skip it yourself, and opt for toast instead of biscuits.
I feel for you though, because it's really hard to cook one way on good, homestyle comfort food but have to eat another! It's much easier when you are living alone and have total control of the menu! I do think the advice to start with portion control is quite sound, too. Best of luck to you!5 -
Could you be a bit more precise: what is your family cooking and what is missing? You do not need diet food to loose weight, however vegetables and fresh fruit are definitely helpful. But as vnb_208 said, portion size and avoiding liquid calories are a big part of the equation. Whatever you do, do NOT look at it as "dieting", i.e. a punishment limited in time, but commit to changing your eating habits for good.
Well I am trying to take red meat and fried food out of my diet. I have already discontinued rice from my diet but I love bread and sweets so I am trying to wean myself off of them. However my family continues to request red meat, fried food, and sweets. They are on a fixed income so it is expensive to try and cook two different dinners daily.
It sounds like you are trying to cut out a lot of foods. That is not necessary. My husband is from the south, likes his current weight, and refuses to eat the healthy stuff I grew up on out west. So, I cook the greasy fatty food with rice or potatoes for dinner and honestly it's delicious! I just eat a lot lighter during the rest of the day and watch my dinner portions. Would your family object to buying a few healthier options for you to eat for breakfast and lunch?1 -
Could you be a bit more precise: what is your family cooking and what is missing? You do not need diet food to loose weight, however vegetables and fresh fruit are definitely helpful. But as vnb_208 said, portion size and avoiding liquid calories are a big part of the equation. Whatever you do, do NOT look at it as "dieting", i.e. a punishment limited in time, but commit to changing your eating habits for good.
Well I am trying to take red meat and fried food out of my diet. I have already discontinued rice from my diet but I love bread and sweets so I am trying to wean myself off of them. However my family continues to request red meat, fried food, and sweets. They are on a fixed income so it is expensive to try and cook two different dinners daily.
No need to wean yourself off something you like! Eat the foods you like in PORTION that;s the key. Fill up on veggies & fruits when available you're talking to someone who eat's pizza weekly, ice cream (halo top)/ Oreo's (2), or something else sweet every night. (down 86 lbs eating foods I enjoy) In order for you to make a lasting change you need to be able to learn how to eat the foods you like by portion control. Sure you can have a piece of fried chicken but you don't want to do this every night or eat 3-4 piece's. Don't make to many changes at once it can get very discouraging.1 -
Could you be a bit more precise: what is your family cooking and what is missing? You do not need diet food to loose weight, however vegetables and fresh fruit are definitely helpful. But as vnb_208 said, portion size and avoiding liquid calories are a big part of the equation. Whatever you do, do NOT look at it as "dieting", i.e. a punishment limited in time, but commit to changing your eating habits for good.
Well I am trying to take red meat and fried food out of my diet. I have already discontinued rice from my diet but I love bread and sweets so I am trying to wean myself off of them. However my family continues to request red meat, fried food, and sweets. They are on a fixed income so it is expensive to try and cook two different dinners daily.
Instead of cooking two separate dinners, maybe try just cooking using different methods? For example, if your family only likes veggies covered in sauce or butter, make it that way for them but steam yours in the microwave. If they want fried chicken, just take the fried skin off yours. That way you're using the same foods and not adding much extra cooking time, but your food will be a little healthier. Finding healthy versions of favorite foods is something I've had a lot of fun and success with as well- my favorites come from Pinterest, Hungry Girl, and Skinnytaste.com. And of course, portioning is important, as others have said.1 -
You can stick with portioning the main dish, and just request a different side (i.e. asparagus vs rice). But don't make your family do everything. If you're not working, then you can go grocery shopping with them (or go on your own), and pick/cook what you want to eat. Better yet, make "healthier" versions of their favorite meals. Coming from a similar situation (not working due to health), take this time to really learn how to cook. It will suck at first if you're not a cook to begin with, but keep it simple, and it will be fun to experiment!
I do all the cooking in the house, but we are from the south where everything is either smothered or fried and they refuse to eat it any other way lol
You always have a choice. If your family insist on Fried Fish, mash-potatoes and gravy. Then fry theirs and BAKE yours, keep a portion of the potatoes to the side for you and omit the fats and leave off the gravy. As you said you are doing the cooking so you are making the choices you are eating.
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chelseahatch24 wrote: »You can stick with portioning the main dish, and just request a different side (i.e. asparagus vs rice). But don't make your family do everything. If you're not working, then you can go grocery shopping with them (or go on your own), and pick/cook what you want to eat. Better yet, make "healthier" versions of their favorite meals. Coming from a similar situation (not working due to health), take this time to really learn how to cook. It will suck at first if you're not a cook to begin with, but keep it simple, and it will be fun to experiment!
I do all the cooking in the house, but we are from the south where everything is either smothered or fried and they refuse to eat it any other way lol
I live in the south and not EVERYTHING is smothered or fried. This is a false statement.
It's not uncommon for families in the south to fry EVERYTHING. I know, I live in the south. I eat with these families.
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TavistockToad wrote: »Seeing as you're unemployed why don't you offer to help by shopping and cooking sometimes?
I actually do all the cooking right now because my grandparents are sick.
So then you can portion out the amount you can eat to fit your calories.
Again, given that you're not working, why not cook 2 meals if you don't want to eat the same as them?1 -
chelseahatch24 wrote: »You can stick with portioning the main dish, and just request a different side (i.e. asparagus vs rice). But don't make your family do everything. If you're not working, then you can go grocery shopping with them (or go on your own), and pick/cook what you want to eat. Better yet, make "healthier" versions of their favorite meals. Coming from a similar situation (not working due to health), take this time to really learn how to cook. It will suck at first if you're not a cook to begin with, but keep it simple, and it will be fun to experiment!
I do all the cooking in the house, but we are from the south where everything is either smothered or fried and they refuse to eat it any other way lol
I live in the south and not EVERYTHING is smothered or fried. This is a false statement.
It's not uncommon for families in the south to fry EVERYTHING. I know, I live in the south. I eat with these families.
You missed what I said I said NOT EVERYTHING is fried in the south. To place blame on that is ridiculous.0 -
chelseahatch24 wrote: »chelseahatch24 wrote: »You can stick with portioning the main dish, and just request a different side (i.e. asparagus vs rice). But don't make your family do everything. If you're not working, then you can go grocery shopping with them (or go on your own), and pick/cook what you want to eat. Better yet, make "healthier" versions of their favorite meals. Coming from a similar situation (not working due to health), take this time to really learn how to cook. It will suck at first if you're not a cook to begin with, but keep it simple, and it will be fun to experiment!
I do all the cooking in the house, but we are from the south where everything is either smothered or fried and they refuse to eat it any other way lol
I live in the south and not EVERYTHING is smothered or fried. This is a false statement.
It's not uncommon for families in the south to fry EVERYTHING. I know, I live in the south. I eat with these families.
You missed what I said I said NOT EVERYTHING is fried in the south. To place blame on that is ridiculous.
I don't think that's what OP was saying at all.2 -
chelseahatch24 wrote: »chelseahatch24 wrote: »You can stick with portioning the main dish, and just request a different side (i.e. asparagus vs rice). But don't make your family do everything. If you're not working, then you can go grocery shopping with them (or go on your own), and pick/cook what you want to eat. Better yet, make "healthier" versions of their favorite meals. Coming from a similar situation (not working due to health), take this time to really learn how to cook. It will suck at first if you're not a cook to begin with, but keep it simple, and it will be fun to experiment!
I do all the cooking in the house, but we are from the south where everything is either smothered or fried and they refuse to eat it any other way lol
I live in the south and not EVERYTHING is smothered or fried. This is a false statement.
It's not uncommon for families in the south to fry EVERYTHING. I know, I live in the south. I eat with these families.
You missed what I said I said NOT EVERYTHING is fried in the south. To place blame on that is ridiculous.
I purposefully capitalized "EVERYTHING" so you would know that I did not miss it.4 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »chelseahatch24 wrote: »chelseahatch24 wrote: »You can stick with portioning the main dish, and just request a different side (i.e. asparagus vs rice). But don't make your family do everything. If you're not working, then you can go grocery shopping with them (or go on your own), and pick/cook what you want to eat. Better yet, make "healthier" versions of their favorite meals. Coming from a similar situation (not working due to health), take this time to really learn how to cook. It will suck at first if you're not a cook to begin with, but keep it simple, and it will be fun to experiment!
I do all the cooking in the house, but we are from the south where everything is either smothered or fried and they refuse to eat it any other way lol
I live in the south and not EVERYTHING is smothered or fried. This is a false statement.
It's not uncommon for families in the south to fry EVERYTHING. I know, I live in the south. I eat with these families.
You missed what I said I said NOT EVERYTHING is fried in the south. To place blame on that is ridiculous.
I don't think that's what OP was saying at all.
I wasn't speaking to the OP0 -
chelseahatch24 wrote: »Chef_Barbell wrote: »chelseahatch24 wrote: »chelseahatch24 wrote: »You can stick with portioning the main dish, and just request a different side (i.e. asparagus vs rice). But don't make your family do everything. If you're not working, then you can go grocery shopping with them (or go on your own), and pick/cook what you want to eat. Better yet, make "healthier" versions of their favorite meals. Coming from a similar situation (not working due to health), take this time to really learn how to cook. It will suck at first if you're not a cook to begin with, but keep it simple, and it will be fun to experiment!
I do all the cooking in the house, but we are from the south where everything is either smothered or fried and they refuse to eat it any other way lol
I live in the south and not EVERYTHING is smothered or fried. This is a false statement.
It's not uncommon for families in the south to fry EVERYTHING. I know, I live in the south. I eat with these families.
You missed what I said I said NOT EVERYTHING is fried in the south. To place blame on that is ridiculous.
I don't think that's what OP was saying at all.
I wasn't speaking to the OP
You originally were. *shrug*
What's the big deal? :huh:4 -
You can stick with portioning the main dish, and just request a different side (i.e. asparagus vs rice). But don't make your family do everything. If you're not working, then you can go grocery shopping with them (or go on your own), and pick/cook what you want to eat. Better yet, make "healthier" versions of their favorite meals. Coming from a similar situation (not working due to health), take this time to really learn how to cook. It will suck at first if you're not a cook to begin with, but keep it simple, and it will be fun to experiment!
I do all the cooking in the house, but we are from the south where everything is either smothered or fried and they refuse to eat it any other way lol
Smothered.......serve sauce on the side, or take your serving out before it get's smothered. Fried.....this is (somewhat) in your control too. They can have fried fish; but you could bake yours.
The other alternative is to have just a small portion of these higher calorie meals. Maintenance is going to work the same way. There will be recipes you don't want to mess with, and that's okay. Work in as many non-starchy veggies as they can stand. These will "bulk" up your servings with fewer calories.1 -
chelseahatch24 wrote: »chelseahatch24 wrote: »You can stick with portioning the main dish, and just request a different side (i.e. asparagus vs rice). But don't make your family do everything. If you're not working, then you can go grocery shopping with them (or go on your own), and pick/cook what you want to eat. Better yet, make "healthier" versions of their favorite meals. Coming from a similar situation (not working due to health), take this time to really learn how to cook. It will suck at first if you're not a cook to begin with, but keep it simple, and it will be fun to experiment!
I do all the cooking in the house, but we are from the south where everything is either smothered or fried and they refuse to eat it any other way lol
I live in the south and not EVERYTHING is smothered or fried. This is a false statement.
It's not uncommon for families in the south to fry EVERYTHING. I know, I live in the south. I eat with these families.
You missed what I said I said NOT EVERYTHING is fried in the south. To place blame on that is ridiculous.
I purposefully capitalized "EVERYTHING" so you would know that I did not miss it.
Right,.0 -
TavistockToad wrote: »TavistockToad wrote: »Seeing as you're unemployed why don't you offer to help by shopping and cooking sometimes?
I actually do all the cooking right now because my grandparents are sick.
So then you can portion out the amount you can eat to fit your calories.
Again, given that you're not working, why not cook 2 meals if you don't want to eat the same as them?
I know what you mean but when you have a grandmother with dementia that is possessive about her kitchen and gets violent you will learn to minimize your time in the kitchen lol. Most days I do my best to cook separately but it's becoming more and more of a battle the sicker she gets.0
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