What causes you to relapse when you are dieting

2

Replies

  • sosteach
    sosteach Posts: 260 Member
    For me I have to agree on the socializing that involves booze...especially wine and mojitos. I will save calories to have a couple but after a couple I say sure I'll have another one. I find it better to just drink water and not get started but I miss it.
  • estherdragonbat
    estherdragonbat Posts: 5,283 Member
    High stress and temptation at times that have triggered me to eat more in the past. I can usually turn down potato chips these days. But back in my school days, cramming for an exam with a bag/bowl of chips next to me was 'normal'. If I were to go and take courses now, I'm not sure if the pattern wouldn't reassert itself. (I know it derailed me on previous weight-loss attempts. As did the celebratory sundae after I wrote the final/finished the term paper. Because after that... the guilt set in. I was doing WW and I decided to skip the next weigh-in and go when I was back on-track. But without the weigh-in or the meeting, things just snowballed and I didn't go back.)

    If I'm emotionally at loose ends, eating soothes me. Nowadays, I eat moderate lower-calorie treats. But let's suppose that I'm going to a family gathering while in that emotional state. And the message is 'Relax! Here. Have some cake and ice cream.'

    I want to believe that these days, I'm in a better place to stay on-track either because
    • I'm exercising more, which makes it easier for me to deal with stress
    • I've got a medical reason to get down to a healthy weight
    • I think I may have finally recognized that if I fall off the horse, I need to get back on instead of giving in to guilt and self-pity

    All the same, I'm not looking to test myself unnecessarily.
  • scrapperthoke
    scrapperthoke Posts: 12 Member
    Boredom causes munchies. Even if they are healthy options they are still calories and takes away from my deficit. It took me years to figure out my ideal calorie intake and that is all changing AGAIN with pre-menopause. Just don't stop learning and readjust when needed. It is a marathon and not a sprint. Pace yourself and stay the course. There will be many more obstacles to come so develop the tools that work for you!
  • laurabadams
    laurabadams Posts: 201 Member
    cqbkaju wrote: »
    If you are the type to stop doing something completely (like "dieting") just because you don't see the results you want right away [instead of fixing the things you are doing wrong and moving forward] then no one here can help you.

    When I read your post, what I heard in my head was "I am not losing weight as fast as want so I start feeling sorry for myself and resume overeating again. What is your excuse for doing that?"

    You don't relapse when it comes to eating habits. Relapse is related to disease and illness.
    You may revert to old habits.
    Your choice of the word "relapse" is telling. It points toward you trying to externalize your behaviors.

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    The word relapse is not exclusive to disease or illness. It can mean a return to a worse state. Relapse, revert, regress...they're synonyms. Perhaps some are choosing to apply more (subjective) meaning than the OP intended.

    I recognize that some people who do not subscribe to the idea of food addictions may also take issue with the choice of the word, but it really is just semantics.
  • cqbkaju
    cqbkaju Posts: 1,011 Member
    edited July 2017
    jospen83 wrote: »
    The word relapse is not exclusive to disease or illness. It can mean a return to a worse state. Relapse, revert, regress...they're synonyms. Perhaps some are choosing to apply more (subjective) meaning than the OP intended.

    I recognize that some people who do not subscribe to the idea of food addictions may also take issue with the choice of the word, but it really is just semantics.
    OK then what worse state is the OP "relapsing" to?
    Habit <> Illness

    We will have to agree to disagree.
    I have seen no peer-reviewed scientific publications that substantiates the claim of "food addictions."
  • dfeyes3
    dfeyes3 Posts: 20 Member
    l911jnt wrote: »
    for me it is when the scale stops for about 3 weeks. It just drives me crazy. I can deal with it up until that point knowing how my body works but then it gets to me. Im in that spot now. Im losing my motivation. I have about 20 more lbs to drop and I am stalled out for a little bit. One other thing is the prep. I cant do it as well if I dont prep and I get tired of prepping food and packing food to take everywhere .... hate it.

    I can really relate to this! I know food prep especially is key but I will resist at times. When that has happened lately, I acknowledged it as a mental barrier and kind of visualized how if I don't prep it's like building a wall or tripping myself. Sounds silly, I'm sure, but I can also visualize how smooth "the road" is when I prep :)
    It's like what was said earlier, focus on mental growth and achievements too!
  • kellyfeb78
    kellyfeb78 Posts: 65 Member
    With me it was gaining weight due to sunburn! I felt like all my work went down the pan and gave up, put on 5lb as a result and now struggling to do a full week of behaving with food weekends being my worst time for binging
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    I never had a "relapse"...I had other objectives that went beyond the number on the scale...the scale was just one of many things, and actually pretty low on my list considering some of my health issues when I first started. I was focused primarily on getting my health back and my fitness back...when I started focusing on that, everything else fell into place.
  • ltkasmala
    ltkasmala Posts: 109 Member
    Stress.... and having chocolate within 50 feet, any direction!
  • KayHBE
    KayHBE Posts: 906 Member
    A big relapse for me is when the cold weather comes. It's dark and cold and sometimes icy, it's just harder to go outside. I am way less active and bored more. As dinners tend to be more 'comfort cozy foods' and more calorie dense and berries/produce are way more expensive, harder to find and have less taste. I am aware of this now and will start going swimming more at the pool and look into joining a gym and some classes.
  • mspris2u
    mspris2u Posts: 161 Member
    Laziness! I start out really well and then start to slide back into my bad habits like a comfy old pair of jeans. By the time I admit it I'm right back to overeating and gain all the weight back... This TIME I've slipped a bit here and there but I get right back to it within a few days and I've lost 30lbs since January, I feel confident this time around that I can maintain it. I've actually developed some healthier habits over the last 6 months that I think will stick this time.... fingers crossed!
  • 76Crane76
    76Crane76 Posts: 133 Member
    edited July 2017
    Wow. What a jerk, the guy that laughs at "relapse." There is such a thing as food addiction, and many people on this app have it. Why do you think so many people fail with diets. They RELAPSE. Also, the man above with the diagram. Are you a psychiatrist or medical Doctor ? Because if you are not an expert on binge eating disorder, you need to not give your opinion. This thread is so negative and this is not what people get on this app for. A nutritionist told me to get on this app and yet I still find trolls on it.
  • laurabadams
    laurabadams Posts: 201 Member
    cqbkaju wrote: »
    OK then what worse state is the OP "relapsing" to?
    Habit <> Illness

    We will have to agree to disagree.
    I have seen no peer-reviewed scientific publications that substantiates the claim of "food addictions."

    You'd have to ask the OP what his/her worse state is, but my assumption is that s/he deems binging as an undesirable behavior, a worse state than eating on plan.

    Not sure what we're agreeing to disagree on, unless it's the definition of relapse? I won't be offering any peer reviewed scientific research substantiating the claims of food addiction for two reasons: 1) I don't personally subscribe to the idea of food addiction; 2) the validity of food addiction wasn't the point in my previous comment.

    I've helped derail this thread enough, arguing over the definition of relapse. My apologies, OP. I hope you've otherwise gotten some helpful insight.

  • Wysewoman53
    Wysewoman53 Posts: 582 Member
    edited July 2017
    First thing I did when I started MFP was to stop using the word 'diet' in the way that most of us use it...to lose weight. Diet is not a nasty word. It simply means what we eat every day...nothing more, nothing less. It's what we choose to eat that makes our diet either healthy or unhealthy. When I planted my garden this year, I knew it would take a while for it to produce. Even on those days when there is no see-able progress, it is still progressing every single day. That's kind of the way I saw my own personal life-style change. Weight loss is not linear. There is gratification and then there is instant gratification. If you are expecting instant gratification, then you may end up sorely disappointed. When I go over own personal calorie allotment, I don't just give up and continue to eat more and more throughout the day or the week. It was a choice I made for the moment but I keep trying no matter what. Every day is a new day, a new start and I don't make excuses for my unhealthy choices the day before. If anything, it makes me more determined than ever to get back on track. We all get to choose what we eat. There is nothing out there we 'can't' have. I just choose to eat things with less calories and healthier for me now than in the past. With this attitude, I have lost 80 pounds and keep the weight off now by making better choices. It is the first time in my life that I have taken control over my own food intake and not letting food control me.
  • MommaGem2017
    MommaGem2017 Posts: 405 Member
    My downfall is by simply not planning. Whenever I don't plan ahead, prep, anticipate the dinners out and special events - then I'm doomed. Maybe I'm exaggerating, but I know that if I don't track then I will underestimate the calories in a food.
  • work_on_it
    work_on_it Posts: 251 Member
    Nachos make me relapse.

  • okohjacinda
    okohjacinda Posts: 329 Member
    My number one is lack of exercise. As soon as I hit lethargic city the binges increase as does my weight. My number 2 is not seeing results as well. I am an impatient person so if I am putting my all into it and haven't seen it go down within a week or two...im like f it.

    Though I am getting better at handling both.
  • vmbourg
    vmbourg Posts: 125 Member
    Stress and not planning. But I found the weeks I dont have time to meal prep, I just stop at the grocery store on the way to work and pick up fresh ingriedients for a salad or sandwhich and I just prep at my desk for lunch. Super fresh that way too!!!
  • Fat2Fab1988
    Fat2Fab1988 Posts: 14 Member
    Restricting myself of the foods I love, the scale not moving, and stress..
  • SafioraLinnea
    SafioraLinnea Posts: 628 Member
    Injuries throw me off course sometimes. Otherwise nothing. Really, I choose everything I do and don't do. Everything else is an excuse and I don't do excuses.
  • French_Peasant
    French_Peasant Posts: 1,639 Member
    76Crane76 wrote: »
    Wow. What a jerk, the guy that laughs at "relapse." There is such a thing as food addiction, and many people on this app have it. Why do you think so many people fail with diets. They RELAPSE. Also, the man above with the diagram. Are you a psychiatrist or medical Doctor ? Because if you are not an expert on binge eating disorder, you need to not give your opinion. This thread is so negative and this is not what people get on this app for. A nutritionist told me to get on this app and yet I still find trolls on it.

    @cqbkaju is a martial arts trainer who consistently and generously offers patient, thoughtful, wise advice encouraging discipline, self-knowledge, and the development of strong habits to support ones goals. It is often packaged in a wrapper of cold, hard truth which makes it particularly useful. It is a refreshing counterpoint to the many people on the site who spout advice they gleaned from Cosmo or some such.

    Rather than immediately resorting to attacking people without knowing anything about them, it might be more helpful to listen to and learn from a variety of sources, even if they may initially hurt "muh feelz." This is how one learns to grow, gain strength (physically and mentally) and master challenges (physically and mentally). Your nutritionist has sent you to the right place. Hopefully you stick around for more than 15 posts so you can learn some discernment as to what is sound advice.
  • susanp57
    susanp57 Posts: 409 Member
    76Crane76 wrote: »
    Wow. What a jerk, the guy that laughs at "relapse." There is such a thing as food addiction, and many people on this app have it. Why do you think so many people fail with diets. They RELAPSE. Also, the man above with the diagram. Are you a psychiatrist or medical Doctor ? Because if you are not an expert on binge eating disorder, you need to not give your opinion. This thread is so negative and this is not what people get on this app for. A nutritionist told me to get on this app and yet I still find trolls on it.

    @cqbkaju is a martial arts trainer who consistently and generously offers patient, thoughtful, wise advice encouraging discipline, self-knowledge, and the development of strong habits to support ones goals. It is often packaged in a wrapper of cold, hard truth which makes it particularly useful. It is a refreshing counterpoint to the many people on the site who spout advice they gleaned from Cosmo or some such.

    Rather than immediately resorting to attacking people without knowing anything about them, it might be more helpful to listen to and learn from a variety of sources, even if they may initially hurt "muh feelz." This is how one learns to grow, gain strength (physically and mentally) and master challenges (physically and mentally). Your nutritionist has sent you to the right place. Hopefully you stick around for more than 15 posts so you can learn some discernment as to what is sound advice.

    That may be true, but when I read his post I thought he was reading things into OP's post that were not there. Unsolicited advice is not useful or kind. And your comment about "muh feelz" is just damn snarky.
  • mulecanter
    mulecanter Posts: 1,792 Member
    Stress. I think many of us go to food as a "happy place" in which to escape stress. Binges can also result from letting that blood sugar get too low, low blood sugar can change the guy in the mirror from fat to thin and invulnerable to excess calories!
  • French_Peasant
    French_Peasant Posts: 1,639 Member
    susanp57 wrote: »
    76Crane76 wrote: »
    Wow. What a jerk, the guy that laughs at "relapse." There is such a thing as food addiction, and many people on this app have it. Why do you think so many people fail with diets. They RELAPSE. Also, the man above with the diagram. Are you a psychiatrist or medical Doctor ? Because if you are not an expert on binge eating disorder, you need to not give your opinion. This thread is so negative and this is not what people get on this app for. A nutritionist told me to get on this app and yet I still find trolls on it.

    @cqbkaju is a martial arts trainer who consistently and generously offers patient, thoughtful, wise advice encouraging discipline, self-knowledge, and the development of strong habits to support ones goals. It is often packaged in a wrapper of cold, hard truth which makes it particularly useful. It is a refreshing counterpoint to the many people on the site who spout advice they gleaned from Cosmo or some such.

    Rather than immediately resorting to attacking people without knowing anything about them, it might be more helpful to listen to and learn from a variety of sources, even if they may initially hurt "muh feelz." This is how one learns to grow, gain strength (physically and mentally) and master challenges (physically and mentally). Your nutritionist has sent you to the right place. Hopefully you stick around for more than 15 posts so you can learn some discernment as to what is sound advice.

    That may be true, but when I read his post I thought he was reading things into OP's post that were not there. Unsolicited advice is not useful or kind. And your comment about "muh feelz" is just damn snarky.

    "Muh feelz" is shorthand for the unexamined, potentially pathological, and often carefully nurtured, coddled, and perversely cherished conceptions we hold about things ranging from our self-worth to whether we are even capable of weight loss. Unfortunately, feelz are one of the worst saboteurs of health out there, so I am always willing to expose them to the light of day and give them a good kick in their pants. In their DAMN pants, since we're now resorting to cussing. (!)

    Most people tend to find success once they have a light bulb moment and get beyond the feelz that are holding them back, rather than catering to them. Some people might need therapy and medication to do this (for example, people with actual diagnosed BED, not just people lamenting their binging and "addiction"), quite a few others have read advice on these forums, learned the facts, realized what their problem was, and did it for themselves.

    Regrettably, it is difficult to have that light bulb flash on, and take control over your life (through discipline, routine, habit, etc.) when you are wrapped up in nurturing these pathological feelings or blaming outside forces.

    To give a personal example, two years ago I would have self-flagellated mercilessly if I enjoyed myself over a holiday, and then probably would have quit what would likely have been an overly rigid, feelz-based diet.Thanks to the "mean people" on these forums who so generously (and meanly!) give their time and advice, day after day, calling BS on all the BS out there, I have an understanding of the FACTS behind weight loss and have been able to achieve and maintain a desirable weight and physique. As have many, many others.

    I am so very grateful to go from self-flagellating over feelz, to just rationally saying, "well that was a stupid decision--oh well, just 500 calories over maintenance, back on track now!"
  • laurabadams
    laurabadams Posts: 201 Member
    edited July 2017
    "Muh feelz" is shorthand for the unexamined, potentially pathological, and often carefully nurtured, coddled, and perversely cherished conceptions we hold about things ranging from our self-worth to whether we are even capable of weight loss. Unfortunately, feelz are one of the worst saboteurs of health out there, so I am always willing to expose them to the light of day and give them a good kick in their pants. In their DAMN pants, since we're now resorting to cussing. (!)

    Most people tend to find success once they have a light bulb moment and get beyond the feelz that are holding them back, rather than catering to them. Some people might need therapy and medication to do this (for example, people with actual diagnosed BED, not just people lamenting their binging and "addiction"), quite a few others have read advice on these forums, learned the facts, realized what their problem was, and did it for themselves.

    Regrettably, it is difficult to have that light bulb flash on, and take control over your life (through discipline, routine, habit, etc.) when you are wrapped up in nurturing these pathological feelings or blaming outside forces.

    To give a personal example, two years ago I would have self-flagellated mercilessly if I enjoyed myself over a holiday, and then probably would have quit what would likely have been an overly rigid, feelz-based diet.Thanks to the "mean people" on these forums who so generously (and meanly!) give their time and advice, day after day, calling BS on all the BS out there, I have an understanding of the FACTS behind weight loss and have been able to achieve and maintain a desirable weight and physique. As have many, many others.

    I am so very grateful to go from self-flagellating over feelz, to just rationally saying, "well that was a stupid decision--oh well, just 500 calories over maintenance, back on track now!"

    Perhaps some posters here felt @cqbkaju's advice was misplaced & came across as harshly-given unsolicited advice, seeing how the OP never requested advice. The post was seeking examples of relatable, common weight loss struggles. Replies criticizing the use of the word "relapse" & telling the OP "if you give up completely just because you don't see the results you want right away, then no one here can help you," seem needlessly critical & misplaced when OP didn't ask for help. And comments like, "You choose to binge eat. No one makes you do it," are assuming the OP is making excuses for his/her binge eating or blaming others for it, when s/he never suggested such.

    Lots of assumptions running rampant through this thread (admittedly, from myself as well). Maybe we'd all do better offering the benefit of the doubt first, before assuming the OP isn't taking responsibility for his/her weight loss struggles.

    Edited for spelling
  • MsMaeFlowers
    MsMaeFlowers Posts: 261 Member
    Anger. When I get angry, I want to eat all the foods. I generally manage to funnel my anger into a work out, or cleaning my house, or pretty much anything active, but every so often I give in and eat my rage away. Lol.

    I just get back on track the next day. No big deal.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    cqbkaju wrote: »
    jospen83 wrote: »
    The word relapse is not exclusive to disease or illness. It can mean a return to a worse state. Relapse, revert, regress...they're synonyms. Perhaps some are choosing to apply more (subjective) meaning than the OP intended.

    I recognize that some people who do not subscribe to the idea of food addictions may also take issue with the choice of the word, but it really is just semantics.
    OK then what worse state is the OP "relapsing" to?
    Habit <> Illness

    We will have to agree to disagree.
    I have seen no peer-reviewed scientific publications that substantiates the claim of "food addictions."

    How about we confine the debate about food addiction to the Debate forum, where it belongs?
  • BarneyRubbleMD
    BarneyRubbleMD Posts: 1,092 Member
    Not sleeping well or not getting enough sleep.
    Also, if my blood sugar gets too high (I'm a type2 diabetic).
  • nowine4me
    nowine4me Posts: 3,985 Member
    Drinking. I still do it once in a while, but just one or two and just a few times a month. Alcohol itself (like a bottle of wine) has lots of empty calories, and once I start, I make bad food choices too. Plus, I'm wrecked the next day and don't want to exercise. Triple whammy.
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