We Broke Up Because....... part 2 .....
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He was always calling me Jackie and my name is Linda!
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Didn't like when I sang Paul McCartney... La la la la la the lovely Linda
With the lovely flowers in her hair0 -
He looked too much like me... people thought we were twins... oh, wait... it is me! Let's get this back on the 1st page!0
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He impersonated his twin Brother and ...
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She liked my twin brother more than me.0
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He was always smiling at me with a Sardonic Smile
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She kept calling me Sardonic and I thought she meant I was the bad guy from Lord of the Rings!0
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Was always trying to out Sarcastic me!0
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She was out of my League!
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I was jealous of all his gorgeous female friends.0
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I just mentioned ONCE, inviting a friend along.0
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I liked his friend more
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She didn't want to be more than Friends 0
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I found out that when he said friend with benefits he was talking about life insurance.0
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She chose another beneficiary so I moved on to a bigger fish0
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She started asking about my beneficiaries... Felt a SNAPPED moment coming!0
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Asked me for a Divorce when I asked her to share her coffee0
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She was a hot mess!0
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Called me a slob0
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Told her that she was so HAWT that she had me SLOBbering like a Baby... Then she just left!
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I was much too old for him!0
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She though age mattered0
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Her smile was bringing too many Boys to the yard
and she wouldn't share! 0 -
She had a keg Stella Artois in the front yard to attract all the boys.0
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He said he was attracted to some Chick named Stella0
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Wasn't open to the Artois during sexy time.0
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Kept trying to get me to try new things from France or wherever the heck that's from!0
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He said I had too much Stella for sexy time0
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