Why do some people stay slim, and never gain weight?

xfc1 wrote: »

I'm not talking about biological factors where there is some factor preventing them from gaining. I'm talking about when they have made a decision to keep slim. I have my own theory as to why they want to do that (at least for some people), but I'm curious as to why you think that they do that. Let's exclude people who are in the business of being seen (models, acting) where being slim is part of their job.

I was slim from the time I started walking at age 1 (or so) until my early 40s. Then I gained a bit of weight and edged up into the overweight category. I wasn't there long before I lost it again and have maintained for the last 2 years.

I remained slim all that time because my mother, a nurse, made some attempt to teach nutrition to my brother and me, and to feed us a reasonably healthy diet with small portions. My diet has changed somewhat since then, but that basic pattern of eating still sticks with me most of the time.

I remained slim all that time because both my parents were active. We walked and cycled everywhere. I continued to be active when I became an adult, and even when I did gain a bit of weight a few years ago, I was still active ... just not quite as much as I had been. For me, walking and cycling is a normal part of life. I can't imagine life without it.

After being overweight briefly, I've also discovered how uncomfortable that is!!! I don't want to feel that uncomfortable again if I can help it.

I think being happily active with anything compared to being bored plays a big role. What I don't mean with that is working out every day but doing something one enjoys doing. The opposite is sitting behind the telly or computer with a big bowl of snacks. If you keep yourself busy you might be less likely to get the big bowl of snacks in the first place, or also to just take one instead of continue eating. I'm guilty of that myself. Keeping my fingers and brains busy keeps me from snacking. I even have a fairly big snack stash in the kitchen at the moment, and don't feel like taking anything.

In the end I think the reason is very individual. Some people don't value food, others enjoy it so much that they only want something special every now and then, others are super active, others aren't bored. Quite likely it's a combination of all those things.

gradchica27 wrote: »

He will also bring a full bag of Oreos to the couch and eat 3. Then leave the open bag next to him for an hour and not touch it, whereas I would eat 12 without blinking and need to hide the bag, brush my teeth, or empty it into the trash. He enjoys food but just doesn't care about it much.

I've never understood why a person would eat a whole bag of cookies.

I grew up with 1 cookie for an after school snack and that really stuck with me. Having even 2 is a bit of an indulgence. But my husband will down the entire collection in one sitting ... and that's just baffling to me. Fortunately for him, he has an active job so he remains relatively slender too.

But more recently it has dawned on me that I'm a food hoarder. I would rather know that there's a bag of cookies in the cupboard that will keep me going at the rate of 1-2 cookies a day until the next grocery day than to eat them all in one sitting.

What ends up happening to me is that food goes stale in the back of the cupboard because my desire to know that I've got food in there just in case is stronger than my desire to eat it.

Machka9 wrote: »

it has dawned on me that I'm a food hoarder. I would rather know that there's a bag of cookies in the cupboard that will keep me going at the rate of 1-2 cookies a day until the next grocery day than to eat them all in one sitting.

What ends up happening to me is that food goes stale in the back of the cupboard because my desire to know that I've got food in there just in case is stronger than my desire to eat it.

Interestingly, I have a touch of this as well. I actively enjoy the feeling that I have food stored. For me, it's in direct tension with my desire to start eating and just keep going, as I know I'll be sad when it's all gone.

I've found I can play the two impulses off against one another to achieve the result I want - not "don't eat all of that, it's bad for you" but "don't eat all of that because then it'll all be gone and you'll be sad".

It works particularly well with ice cream for some reason - I can quite easily squash the desire to have another scoop with the thought that I'll be happier if there's still some left for another day.

If you're anything like me, you obsess over food in a very unhealthy way, which is exactly how I became overweight. In the past, I was jealous of people who stayed slim but didn't appear to try. I learned, however, that not everyone has the same obsession I have. I've learned this because I started treating food differently, not as an addiction.

kshama2001 wrote: »

Machka9 wrote: »

gradchica27 wrote: »

He will also bring a full bag of Oreos to the couch and eat 3. Then leave the open bag next to him for an hour and not touch it, whereas I would eat 12 without blinking and need to hide the bag, brush my teeth, or empty it into the trash. He enjoys food but just doesn't care about it much.

I've never understood why a person would eat a whole bag of cookies.

I grew up with 1 cookie for an after school snack and that really stuck with me. Having even 2 is a bit of an indulgence. But my husband will down the entire collection in one sitting ... and that's just baffling to me. Fortunately for him, he has an active job so he remains relatively slender too.

But more recently it has dawned on me that I'm a food hoarder. I would rather know that there's a bag of cookies in the cupboard that will keep me going at the rate of 1-2 cookies a day until the next grocery day than to eat them all in one sitting.

What ends up happening to me is that food goes stale in the back of the cupboard because my desire to know that I've got food in there just in case is stronger than my desire to eat it.

It lights up my brain like...things I won't mention so as not to derail the thread

I feel a compulsion to eat more and more and more until I feel physically sick.

I don't have Oreos in the house.

I really do think this is one (of many) of the big difference in why people can stay within a normal weight range and some can't.

I don't have that 'a bag of cookies lights me up in a thread derailing way' reaction.
Don't get me wrong, I have a sweet tooth that I get teased about.

I was at a wedding yesterday and the desert table contained all the creamy cakes, trifles, etc I could ever dream of. I was happy taking a bite size portion of 6 of them. That satiated me, I looked at them often, but knew I would just feel uncomfortable, and not enjoy the flavour, if I ate more.
There was no thought of over or under calories, just mmmm I love this, but that is enough.

(I always was given 2 biscuits as a child, and that is still how many I will eat at one time.)

Cheers, h.

I'm pretty sure that every person will have a slightly different reason and a slightly different method. Looking for one reason why slim people want to stay slim seems really reductive.

Those that I know who stay thin usually have active occupations/past times and rarely think about food. I have a coworker who constantly gets so into his work that he forgets to eat on a regular basis, while I think about food at my desk job every 30 min. For me, when I was active (running every day) and younger, I did not have to count calories. Now with a sedentary job and middle age, I do.

Because some don't change their activity or eating habits. I have several relatives that are like that.

A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
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Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

I choose to maintain a low body weight because I like the way I look and feel at this size. I also don't really like food or eating. I understand that some people love the taste and smell of food. They can tell the difference in specific spices used, they cook, and that's awesome, I just have zero interest. To each his own.

xfc1 wrote: »

I'm not talking about biological factors where there is some factor preventing them from gaining. I'm talking about when they have made a decision to keep slim. I have my own theory as to why they want to do that (at least for some people), but I'm curious as to why you think that they do that. Let's exclude people who are in the business of being seen (models, acting) where being slim is part of their job.

Genetics my friend is that way but her eating habits stay the same. She never struggles with food.

If I understand your post correctly, you were asking why some people "choose" to stay slim, implying that it may be a challenge for them.

Along with a number of reasons cited by others, I think there are additional factors, especially for women in Western society and specifically, the US.

Looks matter. Society has prejudice against "fat" people. If you are in the dating market, whatever your age, being perceived as an appropriate size is an advantage, whereas generally speaking, being overweight is a disadvantage.

So even if you have a tendency to gain, you watch very carefully so that you maintain a reasonable weight. You "make the decision" not to be fat.

In the workforce, data strongly suggest that sat by us carries into compensation. Check this out if you think I'm kidding - https://dailyplateofcrazy.com/2013/05/29/salary-and-appearance-think-looks-dont-pay/ - Data shows that obese people, statistically, are paid thousands of dollars a year less, which obviously accumulates over the course of one's working years. A very compelling reason to avoid significant weight gain even if it is difficult, and to "make the decision" not to be fat.

For those who may have seen close relatives die too young from the impacts of obesity - diabetes or heart disease - even if it means a lifetime of watching everything you eat and making sure you exercise, seeing parents or siblings or grandparents pass away too young is strong impetus to "make the decision" not to be fat.

Last, speaking as one who has been extremely overweight, too thin and everything in between, but able to maintain an extremely healthy "trim" weight for roughly a dozen years, every day involved choices and work to stay that size. For me, a lot of it was about the confidence I felt when I was the size that seemed right for me.

That confidence had impacts in every aspect of my life. And it was worth it to make the decision not to be fat.

Jruzer wrote: »

TorStar80 wrote: »

What is your theory because I sort of don't understand what you are asking... maybe if I see your logic, I might I'm always more curious about people who seem to eat and eat (and not just healthy foods) and never get fat!

The key word here is "seem". Humans are notorious for selective memory and confirmation bias.

Often these "naturally thin" people are very active. They are observed eating a large quantity of food, and the casual observer says "See? Look how much they eat and never gain weight!"

I totally agree with that. My mother appears to eat and eat , and she is actually underweight. But in reality if you talk To her many days she skips a couple meals because of nerves or her "eating all day" was cucumbers and humus.

I think many times genetics work in our favor or against. But I also think that it's lifestyle. I am like another poster that said they are considered slim most of their life . But I have recently gained 15-20 lbs. it was all due to my lifestyle change, stress eating, depression, lack of motivation. Now that I'm back on board with exercise and it's coming off . I have my own comfortable weight that motivates me. That's where I feel good . That's where I feel like the healthiest version of me.

lady_ghost wrote: »

xfc1 wrote: »

I'm not talking about biological factors where there is some factor preventing them from gaining. I'm talking about when they have made a decision to keep slim. I have my own theory as to why they want to do that (at least for some people), but I'm curious as to why you think that they do that. Let's exclude people who are in the business of being seen (models, acting) where being slim is part of their job.

Genetics my friend is that way but her eating habits stay the same. She never struggles with food.

I'm genetically predisposed to gaining weight ... if you look at the side of the family I take after. And I do gain it quickly and easily if I take my eye off the ball. And yet, I'm slim.